u/DifferentResearch631

TW: mentions of SH and ED

This is a long one but PLEASE READ.

(for reference, I live in the United Kingdom and I am doing a gap year course before I go to university. So I am going to be saying college 1 (reffering to the college I am at now) and college 2 (reffering to the one I am going to In the coming September)

Hi everyone. I (18 F) have a 'friend' (17 F) who I go to College with. I say friend bc she is the kind of person to make you feel so incredibly small.

For context, we are both in our final year of Musical Theatre College, and today I found out that she has got a place at the college I was going to. Now normally that wouldn't be a problem. The college we are going to (college 2), I have been working with for the last 2 years and have become quite popular by doing their summer camps. Teachers and students know me and actually LOVE ME, which is quite a change as due to my AuADHD and just general quirkyness, have been bullied out of 3 different schools by normal boring ppl.

I was lucky enough to earn a scholarship to a Musical theatre sixth form (college 1) and was honestly having a ball, and getting ready to audition for universities. Now the 2nd year I was there, this girl joins who seems nice at first, if not a bit intimidating. But nonetheless I'm kind and nice, idc what someone looks or acts like, theres always a chance I'm missing something from a situation and given my past of being bullied, Id never want someone to feel the way I did.

This girl seems sweet as when she joins but slowly I start to see more and more cracks in her persona. It all comes to a head when I'm having deep conversation with her about a mutual friend (who also goes to the college who Is horrible) and says she likes to grab ppl without their consent, so to watch out.

(Just Incase anyone wants to come for me for saying this, this girl (20 F) who we are talking about, is a compulsive liar, has talked horrendously about me and everyone else in our college, has fat shamed, body shamed, is homophobic, transphobic and has also been trying to steel my bf of 2 years)

The girl who I am talking to, intentionally or miss intentionally tells our teachers that I am accusing this other girl of Sexually Assaulting me and others. This baffles me, as even tho I said she is a bit too touchy, I never accused her of anything. So this whole thing happens at school and time goes on. The girl apologized to me, stating she feels terrible and she obviously got things wrong. I forgive her of course as it was just an accident but as a victim of SA and DV it does trigger me now when she's around. But again, she didn't mean it.

Time goes on, I thought we were on good terms. But over time her general demeanour becomes more and more bitchy and hostile. Every single conversation consists of "who TF asked you" and "don't care" and more and more hurtful things. Now as a neurodivergent queen, I just assume I'm misinterpreting things, as when I confront her, saying how it makes me really upset and uncomfortable how every time she speaks to me in front of others, it's an insult. She claims that's "just her humour and how she jokes with others" but I told her it is making me upset and she doesn't stop, plus she never does it with other ppl. Also, teachers have called her out for her bitchy behaviors and warned her that if she doesn't fix it there will be consequences. But I want the friends, so I'm nice, polite and offer to do her coursework for her when she's too tired as a like writing. (I've stopped becoming such a pushover since so dw) .

But tbh it's not like there's anything about her body language that would tell me it's a joke. All signs point towards it being true. And considering no one in the school talks to me outside of it, invites me out. I know they're making fun of me behind my back and, from the bottom of my heart, I have done NOTHING to warrant it.

I know people on Reddit will always tell their stories in a way that makes them look better, but that's not what I'm doing since I want genuine advice. She makes fun of me every day and (in addition to my terrible audition season) has caused me to get diagnosed with severe depression and struggling with an eating disorder.

I feel so lonely, all the people I want to be my friends treat me like shit, leave me out, and make me the butt of the joke. The only person who has my back is my boyfriend who is at university in Cardiff and I'm really popular there as well, proving there's nothing wrong with me. I'm all smiles and kindness.

I've talked to the teachers about how she treats me makes me extremely uncomfortable too, and they've reassured me it's not my fault and she is just like that. They know she treats me like that and notices how sad it makes me but at the end of the day, it is such a small school and we are leaving in a matter of weeks that they genuinely can't do much except talk to her (they have, it's done nothing).

Today I find she has got a place at School 2, where I am a big fish in their pond. When I tried to dap her up in congratulations, she looked me up and down like I was pathetic and walked away. I played it off like a joke as per usual while everyone laughed at me. 'poor little Cece with no mates, who no one likes'. I want to ditch her as soon as possible, since I know I can. As soon as we get to School 2, I will be higher on the social food chain, I have the power to make fun of her (not that I would ofc) and I can finally feel free and accepted without this stereotypical mean girl dragging along behind me.

My problem is, I know she has been hurt too. I recognize a lot of herself in me. I notice how she HAS to be liked by EVERYONE. I notice how she she has scars on her arms. I notice how she always has to get a reaction, to be seen as fun so she doesn't have to be out casted like me.

She bullies me because she sees who she was in me.

I want to ditch her as soon as I join my other friends at School 2, but I'm scared of what might happen to her. She's vulnerable, scared and damaged too. She's just a human. But she's hurting me every single day I see her. And she knows she is.

So Reddit, PLEASE TELL ME.

AITBA

TW:

For context: I’m from the UK and currently on a gap year musical theatre course before university. I’ll refer to my current college as “College 1” and the one I’m starting in September as “College 2.”

I (18F) have a “friend” (17F) at College 1 who constantly makes me feel small. At first she seemed nice, just a bit intimidating, and because I’ve been bullied before due to being AuDHD and “quirky,” I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt.

I earned a scholarship to College 1 and finally felt accepted. I’d also spent two years doing summer camps with College 2, where teachers and students genuinely know and like me. For once I felt valued.

Things changed after this girl joined in second year. Over time I noticed cracks in her personality. During one conversation, I mentioned that another student (20F) was overly touchy and crossed boundaries, so she should be careful around her. Somehow this got twisted into me accusing that girl of sexual assault. Teachers got involved, and as someone with a history of SA and DV, it was extremely triggering. She later apologised, saying she misunderstood, and I forgave her.

After that, though, her behaviour toward me got increasingly hostile. Every conversation became insults like “who asked?” or “don’t care.” When I confronted her, she claimed it was “just her humour,” but she only treated me this way, never anyone else. Even teachers noticed and warned her about her attitude.

I kept trying to be kind because I wanted friends. I even helped with her coursework. But no one at school includes me outside of class, and I know I’m the butt of the joke. I genuinely haven’t done anything to deserve it.

I know Reddit stories can be biased, but I’m trying to be honest. Between her treatment and a terrible audition season, I’ve been diagnosed with severe depression and I’m struggling with an eating disorder. I feel incredibly lonely. The only person who consistently supports me is my boyfriend, who’s at university in Cardiff. Ironically, I’m well-liked there too, which reassures me I’m not inherently unlikeable.

Teachers have acknowledged how she treats me and how upset it makes me, but because the school is tiny and we leave in a few weeks, there’s not much they can do besides talk to her—which hasn’t changed anything.

Today I found out she got into College 2 as well. When I congratulated her, she looked me up and down like I was pathetic and walked away while everyone laughed. The idea of finally escaping her was one of the things keeping me going.

Part of me wants to cut her off completely when we start at College 2. I’ll already have friends and connections there, and I know I’ll finally feel accepted. But another part of me feels guilty because I can see she’s hurting too. I notice how desperate she is to be liked, how she always needs attention, and the scars on her arms. I think she bullies me because she sees parts of herself in me.

I know she’s vulnerable and damaged too, but she’s hurting me every day, and she knows it.

So Reddit, AITAH for wanting to distance myself from her completely?

TW: mentions of SH and ED

This is a long one but PLEASE READ.

(for reference, I live in the United Kingdom and I am doing a gap year course before I go to university. So I am going to be saying college 1 (reffering to the college I am at now) and college 2 (reffering to the one I am going to In the coming September)

Hi everyone. I (18 F) have a 'friend' (17 F) who I go to College  with. I say friend bc she is the kind of person to make you feel so incredibly small. 

For context, we are both in our final year of Musical Theatre College, and today I found out that she has got a place at the college I was going to. Now normally that wouldn't be a problem. The college we are going to (college 2), I have been working with for the last 2 years and have become quite popular by doing their summer camps. Teachers and students know me and actually LOVE ME,  which is quite a change as due to my AuADHD and just general quirkyness, have been bullied out of 3 different schools by normal boring ppl. 

I was lucky enough to earn a scholarship to a Musical theatre  sixth form (college 1) and was honestly having a ball, and getting ready to audition for universities. Now the 2nd year I was there, this girl joins who seems nice at first, if not a bit intimidating. But nonetheless I'm kind and nice, idc what someone looks or acts like, theres always a chance I'm missing something from a situation and given my past of being bullied, Id never want someone to feel the way I did. 

This girl seems sweet as when she joins but slowly I start to see more and more cracks in her persona. It all comes to a head when I'm having deep conversation with her about a mutual friend (who also goes to the college who Is horrible) and says she likes to grab ppl without their consent, so to watch out. 

(Just Incase anyone wants to come for me for saying this, this girl (20 F) who we are talking about, is a compulsive liar, has talked horrendously about me and everyone else in our college, has fat shamed, body shamed, is homophobic, transphobic and has also been trying to steel my bf of 2 years) 

The girl who I am talking to, intentionally or miss intentionally tells our teachers that I am accusing this other girl of Sexually Assaulting me and others. This baffles me, as even tho I said she is a bit too touchy, I never accused her of anything. So this whole thing happens at school and time goes on. The girl apologized to me, stating she feels terrible and she obviously got things wrong. I forgive her of course as it was just an accident but as a victim of SA and DV it does trigger me now when she's around. But again, she didn't mean it.

Time goes on, I thought we were on good terms. But over time her general demeanour becomes more and more bitchy and hostile. Every single conversation consists of "who TF asked you" and "don't care" and more and more hurtful things. Now as a neurodivergent queen, I just assume I'm misinterpreting things, as when I confront her, saying how it makes me really upset and uncomfortable how every time she speaks to me in front of others, it's an insult. She claims that's "just her humour and how she jokes with others" but I told her it is making me upset and she doesn't stop, plus she never does it with other ppl. Also, teachers have called her out for her bitchy behaviors and warned her that if she doesn't fix it there will be consequences. But I want the friends, so I'm nice, polite and offer to do her coursework for her when she's too tired as a like writing. (I've stopped becoming such a pushover since so dw) .

 But tbh it's not like there's anything about her body language that would tell me it's a joke. All signs point towards it being true. And considering no one in the school talks to me outside of it, invites me out. I know they're making fun of me behind my back and, from the bottom of my heart, I have done NOTHING to warrant it.

I know people on Reddit will always tell their stories in a way that makes them look better, but that's not what I'm doing since I want genuine advice. She makes fun of me every day and (in addition to my terrible audition season) has caused me to get diagnosed with severe depression and struggling with an eating disorder.

I feel so lonely, all the people I want to be my friends treat me like shit, leave me out, and make me the butt of the joke. The only person who has my back is my boyfriend who is at university in Cardiff and I'm really popular there as well, proving there's nothing wrong with me. I'm all smiles and kindness.

I've talked to the teachers about how she treats me makes me extremely uncomfortable too, and they've reassured me it's not my fault and she is just like that. They know she treats me like that and notices how sad it makes me but at the end of the day, it is such a small school and we are leaving in a matter of weeks that they genuinely can't do much except talk to her (they have, it's done nothing).

Today I find she has got a place at School 2, where I am a big fish in their pond. When I tried to dap her up in congratulations, she looked me up and down like I was pathetic and walked away. I played it off like a joke as per usual while everyone laughed at me. 'poor little Cece with no mates, who no one likes'. I want to ditch her as soon as possible, since I know I can. As soon as we get to School 2, I will be higher on the social food chain, I have the power to make fun of her (not that I would ofc) and I can finally feel free and accepted without this stereotypical mean girl dragging along behind me.

My problem is, I know she has been hurt too. I recognize a lot of herself in me. I notice how she HAS to be liked by EVERYONE. I notice how she she has scars on her arms. I notice how she always has to get a reaction, to be seen as fun so she doesn't have to be out casted like me. 

She bullies me because she sees who she was in me.

I want to ditch her as soon as I join my other friends at School 2, but I'm scared of what might happen to her. She's vulnerable, scared and damaged too. She's just a human. But she's hurting me every single day I see her. And she knows she is.

So Reddit, PLEASE TELL ME. 

AIO

TW: mentions of SH and ED

This is a long one but PLEASE READ.

(for reference, I live in the United Kingdom and I am doing a gap year course before I go to university. So I am going to be saying college 1 (reffering to the college I am at now) and college 2 (reffering to the one I am going to In the coming September)

Hi everyone. I (18 F) have a 'friend' (17 F) who I go to College  with. I say friend bc she is the kind of person to make you feel so incredibly small. 

For context, we are both in our final year of Musical Theatre College, and today I found out that she has got a place at the college I was going to. Now normally that wouldn't be a problem. The college we are going to (college 2), I have been working with for the last 2 years and have become quite popular by doing their summer camps. Teachers and students know me and actually LOVE ME,  which is quite a change as due to my AuADHD and just general quirkyness, have been bullied out of 3 different schools by normal boring ppl. 

I was lucky enough to earn a scholarship to a Musical theatre  sixth form (college 1) and was honestly having a ball, and getting ready to audition for universities. Now the 2nd year I was there, this girl joins who seems nice at first, if not a bit intimidating. But nonetheless I'm kind and nice, idc what someone looks or acts like, theres always a chance I'm missing something from a situation and given my past of being bullied, Id never want someone to feel the way I did. 

This girl seems sweet as when she joins but slowly I start to see more and more cracks in her persona. It all comes to a head when I'm having deep conversation with her about a mutual friend (who also goes to the college who Is horrible) and says she likes to grab ppl without their consent, so to watch out. 

(Just Incase anyone wants to come for me for saying this, this girl (20 F) who we are talking about, is a compulsive liar, has talked horrendously about me and everyone else in our college, has fat shamed, body shamed, is homophobic, transphobic and has also been trying to steel my bf of 2 years) 

The girl who I am talking to, intentionally or miss intentionally tells our teachers that I am accusing this other girl of Sexually Assaulting me and others. This baffles me, as even tho I said she is a bit too touchy, I never accused her of anything. So this whole thing happens at school and time goes on. The girl apologized to me, stating she feels terrible and she obviously got things wrong. I forgive her of course as it was just an accident but as a victim of SA and DV it does trigger me now when she's around. But again, she didn't mean it.

Time goes on, I thought we were on good terms. But over time her general demeanour becomes more and more bitchy and hostile. Every single conversation consists of "who TF asked you" and "don't care" and more and more hurtful things. Now as a neurodivergent queen, I just assume I'm misinterpreting things, as when I confront her, saying how it makes me really upset and uncomfortable how every time she speaks to me in front of others, it's an insult. She claims that's "just her humour and how she jokes with others" but I told her it is making me upset and she doesn't stop, plus she never does it with other ppl. Also, teachers have called her out for her bitchy behaviors and warned her that if she doesn't fix it there will be consequences. But I want the friends, so I'm nice, polite and offer to do her coursework for her when she's too tired as a like writing. (I've stopped becoming such a pushover since so dw) .

 But tbh it's not like there's anything about her body language that would tell me it's a joke. All signs point towards it being true. And considering no one in the school talks to me outside of it, invites me out. I know they're making fun of me behind my back and, from the bottom of my heart, I have done NOTHING to warrant it.

I know people on Reddit will always tell their stories in a way that makes them look better, but that's not what I'm doing since I want genuine advice. She makes fun of me every day and (in addition to my terrible audition season) has caused me to get diagnosed with severe depression and struggling with an eating disorder.

I feel so lonely, all the people I want to be my friends treat me like shit, leave me out, and make me the butt of the joke. The only person who has my back is my boyfriend who is at university in Cardiff and I'm really popular there as well, proving there's nothing wrong with me. I'm all smiles and kindness.

I've talked to the teachers about how she treats me makes me extremely uncomfortable too, and they've reassured me it's not my fault and she is just like that. They know she treats me like that and notices how sad it makes me but at the end of the day, it is such a small school and we are leaving in a matter of weeks that they genuinely can't do much except talk to her (they have, it's done nothing).

Today I find she has got a place at School 2, where I am a big fish in their pond. When I tried to dap her up in congratulations, she looked me up and down like I was pathetic and walked away. I played it off like a joke as per usual while everyone laughed at me. 'poor little Cece with no mates, who no one likes'. I want to ditch her as soon as possible, since I know I can. As soon as we get to School 2, I will be higher on the social food chain, (metaphorically ofc, ik the food chain is bs) I would have the power to make other people dislike her since they all know me (not that I would ofc bc that would be fire with fire) and I can finally feel free and accepted without this stereotypical mean girl dragging along behind me.

My problem is, I know she has been hurt too. I recognize a lot of herself in me. I notice how she HAS to be liked by EVERYONE. I notice how she she has scars on her arms. I notice how she always has to get a reaction, to be seen as fun so she doesn't have to be out casted like me. 

She bullies me because she sees who she was in me.

I want to ditch her as soon as I join my other friends at School 2, but I'm scared of what might happen to her. She's vulnerable, scared and damaged too. She's just a human. But she's hurting me every single day I see her. And she knows she is.

So Reddit, PLEASE TELL ME. 

AITAH

TW: mentions of SH and ED

I (18F) go to a musical theatre college in the UK and recently found out that a girl from my current college (17F) got into the same college I’ll be attending in September. The problem is, she’s spent the past year making my life miserable.

I’ve struggled with bullying for years due to my AuADHD and “quirky” personality, so finally finding a place where people liked and accepted me meant everything. When this girl joined my current college, I tried hard to be kind to her because I know what it’s like to feel excluded. At first she seemed nice, but over time she became increasingly hostile toward me.

At one point, she twisted something I said about another student being “too touchy” and told teachers I was accusing that student of sexual assault, which I absolutely was not. As someone who has experienced SA and DV, the situation was really upsetting. She apologized and said it was a misunderstanding, so I forgave her.

But after that, the insults and humiliation got worse. Every interaction became comments like “who asked?” or “don’t care,” usually in front of others. Teachers noticed and spoke to her, but nothing changed. I kept trying to be nice and convincing myself I was overreacting, but honestly she just seems to enjoy making me feel small.

The constant exclusion and mockery badly affected my mental health, contributing to severe depression and an eating disorder. Outside this college, people actually like me, so I know I’m not the problem.

Today I congratulated her for getting into the same new college as me, and she looked me up and down and walked away while everyone laughed.

Now I want to completely distance myself from her when we start at the new college. But I also know she’s hurting too. I see her insecurities and SH scars, and part of me thinks she bullies me because she sees herself in me.

I feel guilty for wanting to cut her off, but being around her is destroying my mental health.

AITAH?

TW: mentions of SH and ED

This is a long one but PLEASE READ.

(for reference, I live in the United Kingdom and I am doing a gap year course before I go to university. So I am going to be saying college 1 (reffering to the college I am at now) and college 2 (reffering to the one I am going to In the coming September)

Hi everyone. I (18 F) have a 'friend' (17 F) who I go to College with. I say friend bc she is the kind of person to make you feel so incredibly small.

For context, we are both in our final year of Musical Theatre College, and today I found out that she has got a place at the college I was going to. Now normally that wouldn't be a problem. The college we are going to (college 2), I have been working with for the last 2 years and have become quite popular by doing their summer camps. Teachers and students know me and actually LOVE ME, which is quite a change as due to my AuADHD and just general quirkyness, have been bullied out of 3 different schools by normal boring ppl.

I was lucky enough to earn a scholarship to a Musical theatre sixth form (college 1) and was honestly having a ball, and getting ready to audition for universities. Now the 2nd year I was there, this girl joins who seems nice at first, if not a bit intimidating. But nonetheless I'm kind and nice, idc what someone looks or acts like, theres always a chance I'm missing something from a situation and given my past of being bullied, Id never want someone to feel the way I did.

This girl seems sweet as when she joins but slowly I start to see more and more cracks in her persona. It all comes to a head when I'm having deep conversation with her about a mutual friend (who also goes to the college who Is horrible) and says she likes to grab ppl without their consent, so to watch out.

(Just Incase anyone wants to come for me for saying this, this girl (20 F) who we are talking about, is a compulsive liar, has talked horrendously about me and everyone else in our college, has fat shamed, body shamed, is homophobic, transphobic and has also been trying to steel my bf of 2 years)

The girl who I am talking to, intentionally or miss intentionally tells our teachers that I am accusing this other girl of Sexually Assaulting me and others. This baffles me, as even tho I said she is a bit too touchy, I never accused her of anything. So this whole thing happens at school and time goes on. The girl apologized to me, stating she feels terrible and she obviously got things wrong. I forgive her of course as it was just an accident but as a victim of SA and DV it does trigger me now when she's around. But again, she didn't mean it.

Time goes on, I thought we were on good terms. But over time her general demeanour becomes more and more bitchy and hostile. Every single conversation consists of "who TF asked you" and "don't care" and more and more hurtful things. Now as a neurodivergent queen, I just assume I'm misinterpreting things, as when I confront her, saying how it makes me really upset and uncomfortable how every time she speaks to me in front of others, it's an insult. She claims that's "just her humour and how she jokes with others" but I told her it is making me upset and she doesn't stop, plus she never does it with other ppl. Also, teachers have called her out for her bitchy behaviors and warned her that if she doesn't fix it there will be consequences. But I want the friends, so I'm nice, polite and offer to do her coursework for her when she's too tired as a like writing. (I've stopped becoming such a pushover since so dw) .

But tbh it's not like there's anything about her body language that would tell me it's a joke. All signs point towards it being true. And considering no one in the school talks to me outside of it, invites me out. I know they're making fun of me behind my back and, from the bottom of my heart, I have done NOTHING to warrant it.

I know people on Reddit will always tell their stories in a way that makes them look better, but that's not what I'm doing since I want genuine advice. She makes fun of me every day and (in addition to my terrible audition season) has caused me to get diagnosed with severe depression and struggling with an eating disorder.

I feel so lonely, all the people I want to be my friends treat me like shit, leave me out, and make me the butt of the joke. The only person who has my back is my boyfriend who is at university in Cardiff and I'm really popular there as well, proving there's nothing wrong with me. I'm all smiles and kindness.

I've talked to the teachers about how she treats me makes me extremely uncomfortable too, and they've reassured me it's not my fault and she is just like that. They know she treats me like that and notices how sad it makes me but at the end of the day, it is such a small school and we are leaving in a matter of weeks that they genuinely can't do much except talk to her (they have, it's done nothing).

Today I find she has got a place at School 2, where I am a big fish in their pond. When I tried to dap her up in congratulations, she looked me up and down like I was pathetic and walked away. I played it off like a joke as per usual while everyone laughed at me. 'poor little Cece with no mates, who no one likes'. I want to ditch her as soon as possible, since I know I can. As soon as we get to School 2, I will be higher on the social food chain, (metaphorically ofc, ik the food chain is bs) I would have the power to make other people dislike her since they all know me (not that I would ofc bc that would be fire with fire) and I can finally feel free and accepted without this stereotypical mean girl dragging along behind me.

My problem is, I know she has been hurt too. I recognize a lot of herself in me. I notice how she HAS to be liked by EVERYONE. I notice how she she has scars on her arms. I notice how she always has to get a reaction, to be seen as fun so she doesn't have to be out casted like me.

She bullies me because she sees who she was in me.

I want to ditch her as soon as I join my other friends at School 2, but I'm scared of what might happen to her. She's vulnerable, scared and damaged too. She's just a human. But she's hurting me every single day I see her. And she knows she is.

So Reddit, PLEASE TELL ME.

AITAH