u/Diogenes_Will

A perspective shift that stopped my eczema from driving me to suicide.

I want to document a realization I had that gave me a reason not to use eczema as a justification for suicide via this post inspired by a comment left by u/Bataranger999. I personally have been watching the end of my rope grow shorter as eczema introduces me to new delights over the years and this users philosophy dissemination gave me an argument to stick around even with the expectation that it’ll keep getting worse.

For my whole life, even before I found stoicism, the sheer exhaustion from the burning pain of endless cycles of severe eczema had me looking for a way out; a cure. One thought from Seneca justified suicide if it was aligned with the natural response to extreme physical pain, but that lead to a mental trap of constantly thinking, *"I can always take the easy way out if it becomes too much”*.

Then I came across a perspective rooted in Stoic philosophy that forced me to look at my condition entirely differently.

The core realization is that we suffer twice: once from the actual physical flare-up, and a second time from the agonizing expectation that our lives *should* be healthy and comfortable. But the truth is, nature never promised us a baseline of perfect health. Perfect health is an external variable we can't control. For us, the hard reality is that our bodies developed this condition.

When you look at a healthy person and think you're being cheated, you're clinging to an unrealistic expectation of reality, and that expectation is what breeds the deepest frustration and despair.

Once you drop the narrative that you are a victim of an "unfair" universe, everything changes. Accepting this isn't giving up or rolling over. It's just recognizing the exact hand you were dealt. Eczema can dictate your skin, your sleep, and your comfort, but it cannot dictate your mind unless you hand over the keys.

Stoicism taught me that even in the absolute worst of the storm, we retain the power to align our will with reality and withstand it. Knowing that I have the ultimate agency over my own life gave me control, but understanding that I can choose to endure is what keeps me here. We weren't owed a flawless body, but we have just as much of a right to a meaningful existence as anyone else. You don't have to let an unpredictable external condition rob you of your mind. Stop fighting the unchangeable reality of your skin, look the suffering in the eye, and choose to outlast it.

TLDR: A stoic with eczema frames their judgements so that their will is aligned with the true Nature of reality. In doing so one gains the tools to escape suffering, and also the power to take control of the rest of one’s life. To know that killing oneself, if necessary, is an option, yes, but reminding one that you can withstand this. That eczema being out of your control is a test of your virtues. Temperance, Wisdom, Courage, Justice.

I want to document a realization I had that gave me a reason not to use eczema as a justification for suicide, and to disseminate that knowledge with my eczema family. I know some of us here are at the absolute end of their rope.

For a long time, even before I found stoicism, the sheer exhaustion from the burning pain of endless cycles of severe eczema had me looking for a way out; a cure. One thought from Seneca justified suicide if it was aligned with the natural response to extreme physical pain, but that lead to a mental trap of constantly thinking, "I can always take the easy way out if it becomes too much”.

Then I came across a perspective rooted in Stoic philosophy that forced me to look at my condition entirely differently.

The core realization is that we suffer twice: once from the actual physical flare-up, and a second time from the agonizing expectation that our lives should be healthy and comfortable. But the truth is, nature never promised us a baseline of perfect health. Perfect health is an external variable we can't control. For us, the hard reality is that our bodies developed this condition.

When you look at a healthy person and think you're being cheated, you're clinging to an unrealistic expectation of reality, and that expectation is what breeds the deepest frustration and despair.

Once you drop the narrative that you are a victim of an "unfair" universe, everything changes. Accepting this isn't giving up or rolling over. It's just recognizing the exact hand you were dealt. Eczema can dictate your skin, your sleep, and your comfort, but it cannot dictate your mind unless you hand over the keys.

Stoicism taught me that even in the absolute worst of the storm, we retain the power to align our will with reality and withstand it. Knowing that I have the ultimate agency over my own life gave me control, but understanding that I can choose to endure is what keeps me here. We weren't owed a flawless body, but we have just as much of a right to a meaningful existence as anyone else. You don't have to let an unpredictable external condition rob you of your mind. Stop fighting the unchangeable reality of your skin, look the suffering in the eye, and choose to outlast it.

TLDR: A stoic with eczema frames their judgements so that their will is aligned with the true Nature of reality. In doing so one gains the tools to escape suffering, and also the power to take control of the rest of one’s life. To know that killing oneself, if necessary, is an option, yes, but reminding one that you can withstand this. That eczema being out of your control is a test of your virtues. Temperance, Wisdom, Courage, Justice.

I can’t sit still without a debilitating itch consuming me. It feels like spiders are crawling across my skin and randomly biting me all over my body. Almost all day, everyday, for weeks (chronically for my whole life). I’m starting to become very convinced that this is a disability at this point. So much of my time (even my gfs time) is wasted because of my discomfort. My whole life, everything I do centers around my skin. I am planning my future around it.

I’d cut my lifespan in half for the quality of life I’d experience without it in a heartbeat. It’s so miserable I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy, much less my child. If I’d known that this was going to be my lifelong condition I wouldn’t have asked to be born.

I don’t understand why treatment has to be expensive. I’m literally being tortured by my body. Why should I have to pay 20$ for a bottle of Aveeno?

I had a print fail because it had a ~15mm brim on an object (not this one) that was generated over the edge of the buildplate on my Mk3s+as the model was large and complex. All that extra material was deposited in the same spot and caused downstream failure with repeated failed extrusion due to the lack of space for each failed extrusion attempt.

It would make sense to add a feature that used this extra material to add 'ears' (a circle of what is effectively a brim around the ends of long parts) to the edge of the prints, such that it increases build plate adhesion, reduces wasted material and time, and dynamically restructures brims to have the frankly necessary bugfix feature for preventing prints failing, like mine did last time.

I theorize that this would promote functionality as often when i try to fit big objects they have long edges that like to curl due thermal shrinkage, which is why people add ears at the ends because they resist this. The ears would be cut off such that they are more like semi-circles or splines perhaps.

I took some of my gfs vaginal/gut probiotics, and my skin cleared up the next day. I didn’t take it that day, and the skin got worse overnight. I took it again, and skin cleared up the next morning.

Here’s the active ingredients.

“Supplement Facts

• Biotin: 30 mcg (100% DV)

• Lactobacillus acidophilus (as LA-14): 8 B CFU

• Bifidobacterium lactis (as HN019): 3 B CFU

• Lactobacillus rhamnosus (as HN001): 2 B CFU

• Lactobacillus crispatus (as CCFM1110): 2 B CFU

• Lactobacillus gasseri (as HLG13): 2 B CFU

• Lactobacillus reuteri (as HR7): 2 B CFU

• Bacillus subtilis (as DE111): 1 B CFU

• PreforPro (LH01, T4D, LL12 - Myoviridae, LL5 - Siphoviridae): 15 mg

“

FYI, I’m a dude, I just tried them because they were making her crazy bloated and I wondered if it was just her (it mostly was).

Did I just cure my eczema? I joked with her, “what if this is the cure” but then it actually worked and I don’t know why!