u/Dkst2019

As the title says I failed all 3 times (1st: 3F, 2nd: 2S, 3rd: 2S) and I had depression and anxiety issues since O/Ls and some other issues ever since 5th grade (which are not even resolved even now🥲) My whole family calls me a failure and they have a good reason to do so cuz my 2nd eldest brother got into Moratuwa and I was one of the brightest in the primary school and finished O/Ls with 8As. I went to a popular school in Colombo too and the kids even the teachers sometimes teased and bullied me cuz of my issues.

When the time came to do the 3rd shy I tried to skip it but my family especially my Mom wouldn't let me and said to do a course after A/Ls...Which I do now cuz I have no choice and we had financial problems since even before I was born🥲. Also my late father worked a great job in a factory before that. I kind of feel like I brought the bad luck to our family.

Now I do a course in engineering related subject and it's going a bit of a bad way cuz I can't stand the Teachers and kids there cuz they are so rude to me like all the time.

Now I'm doing the course cuz I absolutely have to. There doesn't seem to be another path for me. And I take a large dose of meds for my depression and that causes a lot of sleepiness even after sleeping like 10 hours a night. I can't lower my meds cuz it increases my issues and my doctors say they don't know what's up with me cuz I get a bucket load of meds and still don't improve at least a bit. Don't get me wrong I'm a lot better than me without meds but I'm stuck at this point and doesn't seem to improve. I got meds consistently for two years if that matters. Also I started meds on 2019 a year after O/Ls. I managed to pass in a great way in O/Ls cuz no matter how I felt I knew future me wouldn't forgive me if I failed that exam and I told myself that. I couldn't pull that off in the A/Ls tho🥲.

So my question is: is it ok to fail at A/Ls like this? Is it even okey cuz I had those issues? I never even had a girlfriend to talk about things like this and it hurts cuz I probably will never have one either😓What do I do now?

Is this a INTP behavior or not? I kind of get extremely happy and excited when i see her. She scolds me for touching her hand and talking with her all day. I’m 24 btw.

Is this a intp behavior or not? I kind of get extremely happy and excited when i see her. She scolds me for touching her hand and talking with her all day. I’m 24 btw🤪

Note: I'm 24M now and depressed. Also just curious about what you think.

Hi! im S.

I don't know anybody will read this completely but I have something to get off my chest. Something I told no one except myself. Also I'm not a good storyteller so if things sounds boring or not interesting kindly bear with me.

I (21 M) had (have?) a crush on this really beautiful girl who I saw almost every weekday going to school. She's also as the same age as me. She is very talkative and extroverted and it's hard not to notice her in a friend group whereas I'm an average looking, shy and a weird Introvert. She's a people person and I'm the exact opposite. She talks all the time and she has a lovely voice. Everything about her seemed perfect to me. Even her pimples. (Guess that's how everybody feels about their crush.)

I got to know her name years ago when we went school in the same vehicle. I haven't even imagined at that time I'll feel attracted to her even though she was really attractive even then. Most on the time on the way to school and after-school she talks (with other girls, not me as I'm a boy.) non stop about almost....everything ranges from jokes, stories, and general gossip. The sort of stuff you talk with other girls I guess. In the beginning it was really frustrating to listen to her because she talks non stop but a long time (years) after that I felt....kind of feeling that I liked her.

Maybe there was a time when it was possible to get her to like me but.....I wasn't interested enough I guess. Or maybe the idea that she might be way out of my league kind of stopped me. (Her family is rich and my family is not.) I still think about the last days I saw her and still miss her. Her voice, her laugh, her stories. I struggle even to form genuine friendships so....I don't know if it had been possible to get together. Also as far as I know she has a boyfriend (I overheard others talking about that on my last days to school as a kid on which days she wasn't present.)

To understand the situation better let's talk a bit about myself.

I'm really introverted and less talkative as I said before. (It's hard you know, talking about myself because I've never done this before.) Ever since I can remember I wanted to be someone special to humankind. Like an inventer or a......scientist?😅 That's the best word that explains my ambition. Used to be among the brightest kids in school. But now everything seems to have changed. I feel like a black sheep in my family: failed in A/Ls, depressed and useless. Maybe I'm no use to anybody anyway now that I'm such a failure. So about myself again: I'm the kind of boy who likes to read books in my room even when the world ends tomorrow. (at least I was, I still remember my past self a bit)

The main problem is I don't exactly like being in a romantic relationship. I despise them even though maybe it's not the most accurate word. Maybe I'm just afraid of being used, afraid of being in too many relationships in my lifetime. I want to find just one person that loves me and that I love too. And I want to marry that person and spend rest of my life with her.

Even after seeing her last time about 4 years ago I still think about her. But I don't even know her full name duh (other than two parts of it). I did't want to find out because it's hard for me to admit that I like somebody romantically. Also I'm really shy. I think my subconsciousness grew feelings for her when one of my distant friends asked about her (they had went to the same primary school). He asked me if she was still beautiful. I've seen other girls that are interesting but still think about her even though even seeing her again has a slim chance. What should I do?

Note: I'm 24M now and depressed. Also just curious about what you think.

Hi! im S.

I don't know anybody will read this completely but I have something to get off my chest. Something I told no one except myself. Also I'm not a good storyteller so if things sounds boring or not interesting kindly bear with me.

I (21 M) had (have?) a crush on this really beautiful girl who I saw almost every weekday going to school. She's also as the same age as me. She is very talkative and extroverted and it's hard not to notice her in a friend group whereas I'm an average looking, shy and a weird Introvert. She's a people person and I'm the exact opposite. She talks all the time and she has a lovely voice. Everything about her seemed perfect to me. Even her pimples. (Guess that's how everybody feels about their crush.)

I got to know her name years ago when we went school in the same vehicle. I haven't even imagined at that time I'll feel attracted to her even though she was really attractive even then. Most on the time on the way to school and after-school she talks (with other girls, not me as I'm a boy.) non stop about almost....everything ranges from jokes, stories, and general gossip. The sort of stuff you talk with other girls I guess. In the beginning it was really frustrating to listen to her because she talks non stop but a long time (years) after that I felt....kind of feeling that I liked her.

Maybe there was a time when it was possible to get her to like me but.....I wasn't interested enough I guess. Or maybe the idea that she might be way out of my league kind of stopped me. (Her family is rich and my family is not.) I still think about the last days I saw her and still miss her. Her voice, her laugh, her stories. I struggle even to form genuine friendships so....I don't know if it had been possible to get together. Also as far as I know she has a boyfriend (I overheard others talking about that on my last days to school as a kid on which days she wasn't present.)

To understand the situation better let's talk a bit about myself.

I'm really introverted and less talkative as I said before. (It's hard you know, talking about myself because I've never done this before.) Ever since I can remember I wanted to be someone special to humankind. Like an inventer or a......scientist?😅 That's the best word that explains my ambition. Used to be among the brightest kids in school. But now everything seems to have changed. I feel like a black sheep in my family: failed in A/Ls, depressed and useless. Maybe I'm no use to anybody anyway now that I'm such a failure. So about myself again: I'm the kind of boy who likes to read books in my room even when the world ends tomorrow. (at least I was, I still remember my past self a bit)

The main problem is I don't exactly like being in a romantic relationship. I despise them even though maybe it's not the most accurate word. Maybe I'm just afraid of being used, afraid of being in too many relationships in my lifetime. I want to find just one person that loves me and that I love too. And I want to marry that person and spend rest of my life with her.

Even after seeing her last time about 4 years ago I still think about her. But I don't even know her full name duh (other than two parts of it). I did't want to find out because it's hard for me to admit that I like somebody romantically. Also I'm really shy. I think my subconsciousness grew feelings for her when one of my distant friends asked about her (they had went to the same primary school). He asked me if she was still beautiful. I've seen other girls that are interesting but still think about her even though even seeing her again has a slim chance. What should I do?

Last week I had my tech college exam and I messed up really badly. It was about soldering a circuit and I did design it but failed to solder it correctly. I was the only one who failed that bad. I was thinking about my father who passed away from cancer about three months ago and his suffering and all the memories with him and couldn't focus whatsoever. I was shaking really badly too. The test lasted 3 hours but the instructor allowed me another hour but I still couldn't complete it. I had only soldered about only 3 components and it had like 10+. I tried thinking about calming thoughts, playing songs in my head and stuff but nothing worked. I couldn't focus and did unnecessary things like drinking water, tapping on the desk etc. I have depression for about 8-9 years too. And I have had anxiety issues for more than that. Want to know what this is.

24M. For the context: I have not been taking care of myself correctly for the past few years and have been moderately depressed. Like sleeping for days without cleaning myself or eating enough. I'm a wreck I know but anyways...

This part might sound gross and weird cuz it's gross but I just don't have anyone else to talk to and I need advice from others with experience. My groin smells bad even after I clean it up using soap and water. And it has a weird colour and texture like gray white and creases. I tried to tell my psychiatrist and he sent me to a dermatologist and that dermatologist prescribed me Nizoral cream saying that I have a fungus. I took it for two months but there were days I only applied it once a day. (he said "twice" a day.) anyways so after a while my skin came back to normal looking colour but just as i stopped using it, it came back again. Even with the skin looking like normal "I THINK" the smell didn't go away that time. So here's the really gross part: It smells even worse when I have a boner or thinking about boner inciting things. I tried telling my psychiatrist this and she said I just have Olfactory Reference Syndrome but I Do NOT believe her. Cuz I do too smell myself sometimes and it's grosses me out. Even my mom says I smell when I didn't shower for 2 days. Also when I masterbuate it worsens the smell even after cleaning up which makes me only do it on weekends only. Also I never had sex like ever because I never had a girlfriend and girls look scared when I speak with them because of the smell. (It smells even when I get butterflies in my belly.) So I don't think it's an STD.

I probably have another condition called IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) which makes me pass gas almost every fucking moment. (I know I'm messed up) Which complicates things too.

So last month I really decided to change things and went to a doctor again. He looked at my medical records and prescribed me Izole for 7 days and in the next month, another 7 days. (which starts from tomorrow) And he said to bath everyday which I'm struggling to do so. But I did wash my groin twice a day since recently...any advice?

I was just wondering if I wanna get a iem for mixing music, which should I get? I researched a bit and found KZ AS10 has a flat frequency so it should be great for it am I right? Some might say to get a Headphone but I like a multipurpose iem. Thoughts?