u/Electrical_Month4341

I started dating a guy recently that I dated last year. We dated for a few months (never official) before I broke it off due to him not really being there emotionally. During the time we broke up I met someone who works at the same place as him and we had a 4 month fling. Now the place he works at is a super big place so i didnt think to mention anything as I doubt they knew each other. Now we’ve been back together for a few months and it’s going much better than last time and I can see us becoming serious. The last time we hung out he talked to me more about his job and how he had gotten a promotion since the last time we dated. His new promotion makes him over a certain area that I know my fling works with. Also during our conversation we talked about how his ex cheated on him with a coworker she matched with on tinder. Which is where I met my fling… now im nervous because what if it’s the same man? Even if it’s not he still more than likely knows him… i feel like if I tell him I could ruin things if I dont tell him im being dishonest.

Im 22 and I’ll never be good to my mom. She lives with me and for a longer story im stuck with her for a few years. I take care of my 2 younger siblings mostly financially. I want to spend $600 on myself and Shes judging me for it. I work 6 days a week to support this family. Why can’t I have something without being judged… why can’t I be 22. I just want to be happy and not feel guilty for living my own life. She ruined my childhood and im trying to take my young adulthood but I have her in the back of my head everytime I do something for myself.

Im 22 and I’ll never be good to my mom. She lives with me and for a longer story im stuck with her for a few years. I take care of my 2 younger siblings mostly financially. I want to spend $600 on myself and Shes judging me for it. I work 6 days a week to support this family. Why can’t I have something without being judged… why can’t I be 22. I just want to be happy and not feel guilty for living my own life. She ruined my childhood and im trying to take my young adulthood but I have her in the back of my head everytime I do something for myself.

I have been dating some for several months. When we have sex he mentions wanting to do something specific. Im also into it. I talked to him about it after sex twice and he gave me valid reasons on why he doesn’t want to do it so I dropped it. But still every time during sex he mentions how bad he wants to do it…. And I have no clue to respond because if I lean into it I feel like I’m pressuring him but I also don’t say no because it genuinely is something I want when/if hes ready for it. I feel like my silence is awkward but I have no clue how to handle it. I initiated both conversations about the topic already so I feel like the ball is definitely in his court to bring it up again? What should I do?

So for context i (female) had a friend group with 2 guys i worked with. We’ll call m and A. When we all originally became friends we had another girl in the group we’ll call n. Well I had the biggest crush on m but I never told anyone. One day n told me she had a crush on him. I buried my crush because I was already not wanting to mess up my friendship but now another person in the group could get hurt. Well n was the opposite of me and made her crush very obvious. M got overwhelmed and i ended up being the first person he came out of the closet too (Hes gay). Now this was years ago. M is very out of the closet and thriving. Im very much over my crush. N got a new job and faded away. A has now gotten engaged. I’ve never met his fiancé. Since a started dating her he stopped hanging out with us outside of work but me or m was his ride home everyday. But he did talk about us to his fiancé. She knew I was a mom so she assumed I was much older than I am. Well i confessed that I had a crush on m way back. It was funny we all laughed. A decided to tell his fiancé about it which she grew concerned i’d have a crush on him if I was so much older than them. But the truth is, I am the youngest. Which once she figured out how old I was, she demanded He stopped communication with me. Which he did. It hurt but I can respect it. It’s crazy me that the secret i hid so long ago to not break up the friend group ended up breaking us up in a completely unexpected way. Well not long after this she demanded he stopped hanging out with m because m is gay and “might try something” even though A is straight. He now walks home from work and we act like acquaintance coworkers. None of the newer people would ever know we were the bestest friends not so long ago.

Every year i try to make a big deal about my birthday. Before last year I hadnt had a party since my 14th and nobody showed. Last year for my 21st birthday I threw a huge party. Everyone got super drunk on drinks only i bought while I was still sober and nobody hung out with me. (By huge party I mean just my big family and my closest friends). This year I said f everyone else imma do me. I worked 60hour weeks so I could afford to redo my room. I told my mom over and over again I wanted to have at least my furniture done by my birthday. She took the money. She asked to borrow it for one day so she wouldn’t get a late fee so I gave her my money (service industry i make cash and my name is also on the bill but I had my half) asked her to put it on the card use what she needed and Cash App me the rest. My own mother kept my money and says she needs more time to get it back but now if she even gets it back I won’t have my furniture in time. My friends haven’t even mentioned my birthday im pretty sure they forgot. Im newly dating a guy since may. Not even official yet (but seems to be heading that direction) In may we talked about going to a town a few hours away for my birthday. Never made set plans. On the date I was going to make set plans he lets me know he’ll be house sitting the whole month of June. Can’t even spend the night at his own home no way we’re going out of town. Im hoping he still does something for me but also why do i expect him to do something for me if my family and “friends” don’t even care. Idk if it’s just my insecurities but I feel like he forgot to even tho I mentioned it a hundred times on our last date and casually talking about it in may. I just don’t feel like anyone really cares about me. I’d literally cry if someone did even the slightest nicest thing for me. But instead I cry every year because it’s a reminder on how little people care about me.