u/Emotional_Button5705

If my insurance fully covers it, then I am able to attend near the end of June. I'm 19 and still live with my parents and am scared to tell them. They know i have an eating disorder but they currently think I'm doing fine. I'm scared of their reaction. What if they say no? I don't have transportation and i rely on them. I dont want to go, but i cant keep living like this. I'm scared. I'm going to be away from home for 6-9 weeks. I wont be able to use my phone and I'll have a roomate. I just want to be alone. I hate that I'm hoping my insurance doesnt fully cover it. I want to spend summer at home, not away with a bunch of strangers. I'm scared. I want help but I'm feeling mixed emotions.

oh right. i also work. thankfully my manager is very sweet and my schedule is incredibly flexible. i dont want to explain my situation. i hate it here

I get so salty seeing couples together. I just want to be loved too. I have never dated or even romantically hugged/held hands with a guy. Everytime i have a crush, it never works out. I keep having bad experiences with guys. Like, I'll befriend some guys and then they want to be more than friends. Or when i dont want to hang out, they get really upset and block me. Everytime a guy hits me up, they are never my type. I aknowledge their confidence to message me, but it sucks. I don't like rejecting people. I'm actually afraid of rejection myself. Last time i talked to someone(who mutually liked me) was back in January. Then he ghosted me lmao. I'm barely moving on from him. This is so frustrating. I deserve to be in a happy relationship too.