u/Far_Letterhead_7907

Hey everyone, I hope you’re all doing well. I’ve posted on here before about my girlfriend, who was subjected to domestic violence and physical abuse by her ex husband, who is also the father of her children. They are currently going through family court proceedings, and the judge has now ordered a family assessment.

A big part of this has been incredibly difficult because it feels like the abuse never really ended, it just shifted into the legal system. What used to be emotional, controlling, and physically abusive behaviour inside the relationship now feels like ongoing legal and financial abuse through court proceedings, constant conflict, delays, and using the system itself to continue causing stress, fear, and exhaustion.

I’m just looking to hear from people who have gone through this process themselves, especially in situations involving domestic violence, physical abuse, coercive control, high conflict custody disputes, or concerns about the children’s wellbeing. We’re trying to understand what to realistically expect and how these assessments usually play out.

A few things we’re wondering about:

• How long did your family assessment process take from start to finish?

• Did the assessor seem neutral and thorough?

• Did they actually take allegations of domestic violence, physical abuse, and coercive control seriously?

• Did you feel the abusive parent tried to use the court process itself as another form of control?

• How much weight did the judge place on the assessor’s recommendations afterward?

• Were the children interviewed separately, and how was that handled?

• Did the assessor speak to collateral witnesses like teachers, family members, therapists, doctors, etc.?

• Were text messages, recordings, police involvement, or CFS/CPS involvement considered?

• Did either parent try to manipulate the process, and if so, did the assessor notice?

• Did the assessment help bring clarity to the situation, or did it make things more stressful?

• Is there anything you wish you knew before starting the process?

• Any advice on things to document or avoid doing during the assessment?

• Did anyone feel the assessor missed important red flags?

• How emotionally difficult was the process on you and the children?

• If there were addiction or substance abuse concerns involved, were those properly looked into?

• Did anyone feel the court system unintentionally gave the abusive parent more opportunities to continue the abuse through motions, delays, financial strain, or constant conflict?

We know every case is different, but hearing real experiences from others who have gone through this would honestly help a lot right now. Good experiences, bad experiences, things you wish you did differently, anything really.

Thank you to anyone willing to share.

Hey everyone, I hope you’re all doing well. I’ve posted on here before about my girlfriend, who was subjected to domestic violence and physical abuse by her ex husband, who is also the father of her children. They are currently going through family court proceedings, and the judge has now ordered a family assessment.

A big part of this has been incredibly difficult because it feels like the abuse never really ended, it just shifted into the legal system. What used to be emotional, controlling, and physically abusive behaviour inside the relationship now feels like ongoing legal and financial abuse through court proceedings, constant conflict, delays, and using the system itself to continue causing stress, fear, and exhaustion.

I’m just looking to hear from people who have gone through this process themselves, especially in situations involving domestic violence, physical abuse, coercive control, high conflict custody disputes, or concerns about the children’s wellbeing. We’re trying to understand what to realistically expect and how these assessments usually play out.

A few things we’re wondering about:

• How long did your family assessment process take from start to finish?

• Did the assessor seem neutral and thorough?

• Did they actually take allegations of domestic violence, physical abuse, and coercive control seriously?

• Did you feel the abusive parent tried to use the court process itself as another form of control?

• How much weight did the judge place on the assessor’s recommendations afterward?

• Were the children interviewed separately, and how was that handled?

• Did the assessor speak to collateral witnesses like teachers, family members, therapists, doctors, etc.?

• Were text messages, recordings, police involvement, or CFS/CPS involvement considered?

• Did either parent try to manipulate the process, and if so, did the assessor notice?

• Did the assessment help bring clarity to the situation, or did it make things more stressful?

• Is there anything you wish you knew before starting the process?

• Any advice on things to document or avoid doing during the assessment?

• Did anyone feel the assessor missed important red flags?

• How emotionally difficult was the process on you and the children?

• If there were addiction or substance abuse concerns involved, were those properly looked into?

• Did anyone feel the court system unintentionally gave the abusive parent more opportunities to continue the abuse through motions, delays, financial strain, or constant conflict?

We know every case is different, but hearing real experiences from others who have gone through this would honestly help a lot right now. Good experiences, bad experiences, things you wish you did differently, anything really.

Thank you to anyone willing to share.

Hey everyone, I hope you’re all doing well. I’ve posted on here before about my girlfriend, who was subjected to domestic violence and physical abuse by her ex husband who is also the father of her children. They are currently going through family court proceedings, and the judge has now ordered a family assessment.

A big part of this has been incredibly difficult because it feels like the abuse never really ended it just shifted into the legal system. What used to be emotional, controlling, and physically abusive behaviour inside the relationship now feels like ongoing legal and financial abuse through court proceedings, constant conflict, delays, and using the system itself to continue causing stress, fear, and exhaustion.

I’m just looking to hear from people who have gone through this process themselves, especially in situations involving domestic violence, physical abuse, coercive control, high conflict custody disputes, or concerns about the children’s wellbeing. We’re trying to understand what to realistically expect and how these assessments usually play out.

A few things we’re wondering about:

• How long did your family assessment process take from start to finish?

• Did the assessor seem neutral and thorough?

• Did they actually take allegations of domestic violence, physical abuse, and coercive control seriously?

• Did you feel the abusive parent tried to use the court process itself as another form of control?

• How much weight did the judge place on the assessor’s recommendations afterward?

• Were the children interviewed separately, and how was that handled?

• Did the assessor speak to collateral witnesses like teachers, family members, therapists, doctors, etc.?

• Were text messages, recordings, police involvement, or CFS/CPS involvement considered?

• Did either parent try to manipulate the process, and if so, did the assessor notice?

• Did the assessment help bring clarity to the situation, or did it make things more stressful?

• Is there anything you wish you knew before starting the process?

• Any advice on things to document or avoid doing during the assessment?

• Did anyone feel the assessor missed important red flags?

• How emotionally difficult was the process on you and the children?

• If there were addiction or substance abuse concerns involved, were those properly looked into?

• Did anyone feel the court system unintentionally gave the abusive parent more opportunities to continue the abuse through motions, delays, financial strain, or constant conflict?

We know every case is different, but hearing real experiences from others who have gone through this would honestly help a lot right now. Good experiences, bad experiences, things you wish you did differently, anything really.

Thank you to anyone willing to share.

In a 2007 Skyline Layton 268 what would be the cause of the slide out not to work. We have shore power. Lights working, AC working. When clicking the slide out switch it does not move. Can it be a fuse issue?

In a 2007 Layton Skyline 268 what would be the cause of the slide out not working. The camper has lights, and AC. Also has shore power. The camper will just not slide out when clicking the switch. Possible fuse problem perhaps? Can someone help me on this!

Quick question all. Did anyone hear about anyone getting laid off due to tarrifs in 2025 from Savanna Drilling in Alberta. Specifically January to June of 2025..

Hey everyone, I’ve posted in here before and really appreciated the insight, so I’m coming back looking for some perspective again.

I’m posting on behalf of my girlfriend because I’m trying to better understand what she’s dealing with and how to support her through this.

She left a relationship that involved serious domestic abuse, and since the separation it feels like things have shifted into more subtle, system-based conflict.

During the relationship there were repeated patterns where he would disappear for days at a time, sometimes longer, and then return and create chaos in the home. A lot of those returns involved heavy drinking or drug use and would lead to arguments and instability. That cycle of absence and then conflict has been really hard on her and the kids.

There are also recordings of some of these incidents, but he now claims they are manipulated or taken out of context and not what actually happened, which has added another layer of frustration and confusion.

Since the separation, the issues have continued in a different way. He has stopped consistently paying child support and is now reporting a much lower income than what he historically earned, despite having a strong earning history. From the outside, it feels less like a genuine change in circumstances and more like another way of avoiding responsibility and creating financial pressure.

One thing that has made this even more confusing is the explanations being given for the income drop. At one point he blamed external political factors, including things related to Donald Trump, for losing work, even though we are in Canada. It’s hard to make sense of that and whether courts take those kinds of explanations seriously.

There has also been involvement from child services in the past, and for a long period he had very limited involvement with the kids. Now he is trying to increase his parenting time, even though stability has been an ongoing concern.

On top of that, unrelated issues are being brought into the situation. For example, a family member of his is now making a civil claim about personal property that allegedly went missing from the home after separation. These items were left there for a long time in a locked space that she didn’t have access to, and multiple people had access during that time. It’s now being brought into the family matter, which feels confusing and overwhelming.

From the outside looking in, it feels like there’s a pattern of instability, inconsistent involvement, financial pressure, and new issues being introduced instead of focusing on what’s best for the kids.

I’m trying to stay grounded and help her focus on what actually matters, but it’s hard not to get pulled into everything.

For those of you who have been through similar situations, how did you keep things focused when the other side keeps introducing new angles? How do courts typically handle situations where support isn’t being paid consistently and income suddenly drops? Do explanations like that ever carry weight? And how do you support someone through this without them getting overwhelmed by all the extra noise?

Really appreciate any insight again.