u/HeresJohnny1212

Everything feels 2D.

I feel like I'm missing a layer of reality, like I can't associate with reality because part of my brain is missing.

I feel like I'm in my own world, and I can't see the grand reality, as if layer of reality has evaporated and I'm left with some empty brain. The way I see things, no emotions for people or myself.

I'm just living my own reality with melted brain. I dont care about relationships or marriage or anything. Everything is 2D, flat, and small. I feel soo alone in this.

Sometimes I think it's my past habit of extreme masturbation as a child because that was the only habit I had as a child. I used to masturbate heavily as a 7 year old and by the time I was 9 I had ejaculated every single day. I was excessive when it came to that.

What's weird is I don't have any emotions towards relationship or anything like that.

I understand basic stuff like when it comes to talking and when directed to do something I would do it, but my perception of reality is soo scary.

I feel I can't see or experience THE FULL REALITY.

It's like gasping for air, I'm gasping for reality but it's missing. I feel I'm in a cartoon. I feel dull or as if something has melted. And as a result I'm just having to cope with this strange reality.

Anyone else suffering like this?

It's as if something in me or brain has disappeared. I've had a MRI which came back normal. I honestly don't know if I'm overthinking or if I can't see the other side of reality. I feel some layer of reality or consciousness is missing.

Have I destroyed my brain from excessive masturbation since a young age?

I can't think of any other reason.

I was in India, I was very energetic and loud and naive. There used to be 2 servants of this family home. I got along very well with one of them and became friends. He was a kid and perhaps few years younger than me. There was also another servant who was around that same age. However, the one I was friends with hated the other servant.

.They used to tell me bad things about the other servant and I for some reason pushed the other servant to the ground. I can tell that servant was hirt

.

I can't stop thinking about ny actions as a kid and why I pushed that servant. I feel absolutely guilty and disgusted and I feel God punishes those who do such a thing.

Has anyone done something like this that they regret?

I feel soo much detached from reality. I had a very heavy masturbation habit as a child. I started around about 7 ish and indulged in masturbation every single day until 20. I ejaculated everyday since age 9.

I haven't done any drugs

All I did was masturbation every single day as a kid. I ejaculated numerous times.

I feel soo detached that I'm sure I've ruined ny mind / brain. I feel I'm not part of this life.

I'm soo scared. I haven't been abused or anything I just feel detached.

For example, I started really early...and I mean really early. Probably around 7 or 8. I got into looking at lingerie photos at young age and for some reason got excited and copied the lingerie photos. This is the main habit I have had as a child. I did masturbation every bloody day. I'm crying as we speak this because this went on until I was able to ejaculate at age of 9 ish.

You lot don't understand, I masturbated and ejaculated everyday. I kept doing it. This was me growing up. I sometimes feel like just wanting to end my life because of this. I couldn't help it. I did it everyday. Ejaculation etc.

I must have ejaculated everyday until the age of 20.

My health suffered alot. I've been a slave to masturbation porn every bloody day. I felt awful, disgusting, slow. I used to have weird brain problems. Scares of people, blush everytime because I was disgusted. I was athletic but I suffered because I ejaculated everyday.

I cry to God because I feel since I started young age, its ruined my health, my brain must have melted. I feel soo derealised, I'm fighting for my life because my brain feels soo seperate to reality, always feeling high and feel it's been melted or something has zapped some life energy.

I cry because I feel soo guilty and imprisoned to this.

NY mind has been ruined.

I've stopped masturbation 13 years ago, but I feel it's too late as I've been masturbation from age of 7, I had ejaculated ever since 9... EVERYDAY.

The amount of semen I let out since 9 must have killed my brain.

Anyone here who can relate?

I feel I've done permanent damage since I started this excessively soo young.

I feel like I've escaped life and just taking a backseat. It's a very weird vision but it's as if I can't experience life properly and I'm in some 2D world. Its really tough for me to explain. I feel I'm in my own hyper high 2D world and my brain or conciousness has shrunk that I feel numb towards things or the drama in the world.

I'm always feeling high and mind / head feels hollow. I'm always very content, like I don't find the need to get into a relationship but I'm constantly thinking about sex.

I am never feeling hate towards anyone. I don't ever think too much about work politics or anything.

Everything around me feels soo serious though and it's scary. Everything feels off.

I don't know if this is due to too much masturbation as a kid when I was young or if I were born like this?

Nonetheless I'm scared and feel terrified that my brain is permanently like this.

I feel happy and excited for no reason that it gets to the point that I feel that I'm not normal?

What I mean by this is, I feel soo carefree talking to people that I fear many think in crazy because everyone else seems soo serious in life. I go to my office and everyone hardly talks, but I'm there cracking up jokes laughing about anything.

I get work done but I'm also a very excited person.

I also never feel the desperation to get into a relationship. I'm always happy and try to ignore negative stuff. Like people are moaning and I just ignore that and question what's wrong with people.

I never moan because its negative energy and it's just boring but then I feel maybe something is wrong with me because I just get on with things.

I never get too involved with people or discussions about family members etc, like I never have problems with anyone nor do I talk or complain about people.

I don't know if I'm just very carefree, but also not gullible or naive. Like I know if someone is messing about, but I dont ever think too much about people.

Also, I never felt desperate or obsessed about being in a relationship. I'm just soo chilled and content.

Is this normal?

Can anyone relate?

If someone has a part of their brain missing, would that mean that a chunk of reality or conscious would be missing aswell?

Just curious.

Whatever it that connects us to this world, surely that would be damaged if the brain is missing or damaged leading to an altered perception of life?

I just feel like my mind is flat. I would say I'm in my own high and comfortable, but that's why it's scary to me.

I just feel as if I've escaped the matrix or something and I'm experiencing life in 2D. It's as if I'm a big chunk of butter and knife can easily cut past me, or as if I'm a balloon and floating. Its giving me the feeling that I can't see the other side of reality.

Like I would be working and I'm just super excited for no reason. I'm looking at people, colleagues and they are soo serious. I'm wondering if I'm missing out on some essence of reality that would make as serious as them.

I feel disconnected and feel like I'm in my own high created world and I'm living in my own mind. I get constant panic attacks that I have to ground myself by looking at photos with descriptions of what the photo is about or what the video about just to get confirmation that I'm normal.

I don't know if it's the seriousness of everything that gets me panicky. Like people may be serious and not that talkative. I get excited and try to talk with everyone.

Also, I think what triggers the majority of my panic attacks is how I see everyone having to find someone and fall in love with a woman. I don't ever feel desperate to go for someone for companionship. Like I wouldn't mind someone, but for the sake of this whole concept of loneliness and going after another human, I don't get that feeling. I begin to ask myself what all the fuss is about. This triggers my derealisation more and I start to ponder if my mind or reality is normal because I'm already high and pretty much content.

I never feel sad, or get jealous or angry at people which again triggers my derealisation. I feel like I'm in my own reality soo I over analyse my feelings. I never get this angry feel. I just laugh on my own at times and wonder am I just high. Is there some part of reality I can't see that would make me serious and less laughing?

I just don't know and can't tell if I'm overthinking or if there is physically wrong / part of my brain or something missing.

I just feel like my mind is flat. I would say I'm in my own high and comfortable, but that's why it's scary to me.

I just feel as if I've escaped the matrix or something and I'm experiencing life in 2D. It's as if I'm a big chunk of butter and knife can easily cut past me, or as if I'm a balloon and floating. Its giving me the feeling that I can't see the other side of reality.

Like I would be working and I'm just super excited for no reason. I'm looking at people, colleagues and they are soo serious. I'm wondering if I'm missing out on some essence of reality that would make as serious as them.

I feel disconnected and feel like I'm in my own high created world and I'm living in my own mind. I get constant panic attacks that I have to ground myself by looking at photos with descriptions of what the photo is about or what the video about just to get confirmation that I'm normal.

I don't know if it's the seriousness of everything that gets me panicky. Like people may be serious and not that talkative. I get excited and try to talk with everyone.

Also, I think what triggers the majority of my panic attacks is how I see everyone having to find someone and fall in love with a woman. I don't ever feel desperate to go for someone for companionship. Like I wouldn't mind someone, but for the sake of this whole concept of loneliness and going after another human, I don't get that feeling. I begin to ask myself what all the fuss is about. This triggers my derealisation more and I start to ponder if my mind or reality is normal because I'm already high and pretty much content.

I never feel sad, or get jealous or angry at people which again triggers my derealisation. I feel like I'm in my own reality soo I over analyse my feelings. I never get this angry feel. I just laugh on my own at times and wonder am I just high. Is there some part of reality I can't see that would make me serious and less laughing?

I just don't know and can't tell if I'm overthinking or if there is physically wrong / part of my brain or something missing.

Hi there.

So when I was around 7 I used to touch my genitals alot. I used to explore done there alot to the point that I used to get fascinated by women's lingerie in clothing magazines. For some reason, I would rub my genitals on to the lingerie section of the clothing catalogue. This would go on forever. I think it was around the age of 9 when I first ejaculated when doing this. I would ejaculate alot at this point and the pages would get stuck together. I still remember it like it were yesterday. I ejaculated everyday from that point onwards. This type of masturbation would continue until I hit age 11 when I had my first ever computer and was exposed to porn for the first time. At that age, I began the normal hand over genitals masturbation. Soo I did this and ejaculated alot until my 20s.

I have stopped but I feel like I'm the only one who started this early and had excessive addiction to this. I have not done any drugs or anything but I do feel brain rot, derealisation and just feel empty.

Is this normal feeling from years of excessive masturbation, gooning etc?

Can anyone relate?

Hi there.

So when I was around 7 I used to touch my genitals alot. I used to explore done there alot to the point that I used to get fascinated by women's lingerie in clothing magazines. For some reason, I would rub my genitals on to the lingerie section of the clothing catalogue. This would go on forever. I think it was around the age of 9 when I first ejaculated when doing this. I would ejaculate alot at this point and the pages would get stuck together. I still remember it like it were yesterday. I ejaculated everyday from that point onwards. This type of masturbation would continue until I hit age 11 when I had my first ever computer and was exposed to porn for the first time. At that age, I began the normal hand over genitals masturbation. Soo I did this and ejaculated alot until my 20s.

I have stopped but I feel like I'm the only one who started this early and had excessive addiction to this. I have not done any drugs or anything but I do feel brain rot, derealisation and just feel empty.

Is this normal feeling from years of excessive masturbation, gooning etc?

Can anyone relate?

I'm talking about non stop masturbation. I did it heavily as a 7 year old. Used to push my genitals and rub against the magazine lingerie pictures. I did this everyday and around 9 I was able to ejaculate ALOT EVERYDAY. I must have LOST ALOT of semen, and I mean alot, to the point I must have dehydrated my body to the point of brain illness.

I started at 7 all the way to 20s, constant ejaculation. I'm scared I've melted my brain somehow.

​

I feel like reality is missing, as if I'm only reacting to it subconsciously, but the layer of reality has been removed and I'm in some foggy 2D world.

It's like I'm gasping for air, I don't know if I was born like this or whether it's due to too much masturbation from young age where I feel my brain has melted.

Everything and everyone looks soo serious in life, but I feel soo high and lightheaded that I don't feel the pressures of life. I don't the longing for a relationship or anything. I'm just in my own zone.

Its lonely scary feeling the way I'm experiencing life, trying to reach out to reality.

This is what my life is. I'm getting severe anxiety. I'm in my own high plus everything looks 2D, I start to question whether I'm living out of touch of reality. I do t even feel hurt or heartbroken with relationships. I feel I'm in my own cloudiness. Its bizarre. I try to convince myself that I'm ok, but this feeling is too strong and real.

I have to ground myself to feel that I'm normal. I never felt the urge for relationships but as I look at relationships from far, I feel that something is wrong with me.

Everything is overwhelming that I cant help it.

I feel as if a big portion of my brain is missing because I'm cut off from reality, everything looks fuzzy, 2D, cartoony.

I go out for walks to do my deep breathing.

Anyone else can relate?

It's a nightmare.

I start to question my surroundings and end up asking myself 'am I meant to fall in love with that girl?' Why don't I have any feelings. Am I experiencing the same reality as others?

I get a panic attack just thinking like this. As if I'm missing on the reality everyone is perceiving but I can't.

If someone has a part of their brain missing, would that mean that a chunk of reality would be missing aswell?

Just curious.

Whatever it that connects us to this world, surely that would be damaged if the brain is missing or damaged leading to an altered perception of life?

I feel soo comfortable in my own zone, I never ever felt the need for a relationship. I don't know what it is, but I felt overwhelmed by this because everywhere I see people massively in love and I'm here thinking what the big deal is.

I'm soo scares I end up crying because I don't have that desperate need that others do finding someone.

Sure if I see an attractive woman I would compliment them but I don't ever feel the need to have someone. It's only if my family nags me to find someone then I would see but I NEVER GOT OUT OF NY WAY to find someone. I just feel soo comfortable being single that I'm getting overwhelmed by this and scared.

I really don't know what I have. I have no interest in any relationship. I feel soo good on my own or with family.

I get severe anxiety and panic attacks because I feel something is wrong with me. It's as if I can't experience life fully like a normal human being. I feel I have some part of my brain or back missing, like my brain is sick and burnt out.

I feel soo high in my own space that its freaking me out soo much and questioning whether I'm in another dimension or not.

I think I was born with this.

I don't have any interest in marriage or anything. I'm just soo comfortable. I'm scared.