u/IllLiterature1026

First time mom in my 3rd trimester. I was laid of slightly before conceiving and although I spent my pregnancy looking for work I did not land anything due to a downturn in my industry.

My current plan is to use California disability to give birth (6-8 weeks PP) and then take a little extra time. Ideally I’ll start looking for work again after about 3.5 months at home.

I’m wondering if anyone else was forced to look for work with a young baby and how you went about it logistically. That includes what your timeline was (and whether it felt too soon), how you arranged childcare, and how you stayed connected in your industry.

I’m in an area where childcare often has long waitlists, and where I might not have much notice before being asked to accept a job. Since I freelance, a job could be 2 weeks or two years, and the hours are usually out of my control.

Luckily my husband works full time with relatively steady hours, but doesn’t make enough to support three people on his income so me looking for work is imperative. We’re only getting by because our families are temporarily helping and because of savings from my last job. At max my income could be double his and with much better healthcare. Since both of our jobs aren’t entirely stable, we’ve decided it’s necessary for both of us to stay in the workforce.

Note, I posted something similar on a finance-related sub and half of the comments told me to get an abortion, and it was stressful enough that I deleted my account. This is a very wanted child and while the timing isn’t perfect we’re determined to make it work. So please be nice.

Currently decluttering my 2 bedroom 900 sq foot house to make room for a baby - this involves cleaning out closets so I have room to store diapers and basically slowly going through everything and trying to remove excess.

The issue comes with the amount of stuff I’m collecting. I built my registry with a fairly minimalist approach by keeping my small space in mind (for example, the baby won’t have a room of its own so everything needs to fit in my room for the time being). Then came along Buy Nothing and donations from friends, and I’ve ended up with a whole lot of stuff I didn’t specifically ask for, but that I’ve heard could be useful. I’m hesitant to get rid of stuff that was 1) free and 2) I might later decide I need. As a FTM I don’t really know what will come in handy in the middle of the night. For example, what if I’m out of laundry and need extra onesies? But cumulatively, all this stuff adds space which is a rarity in my house.

Then comes the need for a decluttering strategy later. I’d like to donate most things as soon as the baby grows out them if I can. I don’t know whether I’ll have more children so I’m hesitant to keep anything “just in case” unless it’s extremely valuable, such as a convertible crib. If I found it cheap, I can probably find it again cheap. Of course the valuable stuff is also the bulkiest.

I’d love to hear from parents of young children - what’s your decluttering strategy? How do you keep the kids stuff from getting out of hand? How far ahead to accept stuff that could be useful in the future, especially if it’s free/discounted/gifted? How often do you get rid of stuff the kids have outgrown, and how do you keep on top of it? At what point do you say no?

This a whole new world to me.

Long term vegan and tofu advocate here.

I see a LOT of advice for tofu newbies that freezing and defrosting is the way to go and I’m just here to counter that. I think the texture can get too dry and spongy and I prefer a softer center most is the time. I don’t think there are no uses for frozen tofu but I think it’s over-relied on as a preparation tactic. I get that it’s subjective.

Currently pregnant and looking for more dresses, since they seem to be the most comfortable and accommodating clothes for me right now. They do NOT need to be maternity, but they need to be “bump friendly” - that is, the belly area should be loose and drapey and the chest should be accommodating. Empire waist dresses are great. Ideally it’s the kind of stuff I will also be able to wear postpartum.

So far most of what I’ve found has been either
- polyester - completely disqualifying, especially because it’s summer and I need breathable fabrics
- boring - Quince is a good example here. Plain fabrics, boring colors. I love patterns, color blocking, brights - doesn’t need to go crazy but I don’t need a dress in another shade of calming blue.
- cheap Amazon brands - where did these brands come from? How do I trust them?
Or
- expensive. I’d like to spend around $100 give or take max, which is limiting. I’m happy to thrift online if I know the brand will fit and be at least moderate quality. And yes, I have been thrifting in person but most of what I’m finding there is also polyester.

So, any brand suggestions that are moderately affordable (new or used), decent quality, and fun with the kinds of dresses I’m looking for in primarily (95%+) natural fabrics?

Visiting family and will be having dinner shortly after I arrive. I’ve been asked to bring my signature lemon cake.

However, the cake will be made at home and then transported about 7 hours by car to the relative’s house.

I would normally make a vegan buttercream frosting but this will probably melt in the car, and I won’t have much time to prep something fancy once I arrive.

There will be plenty of natural grocery stores where I’m going, but I’ve never been a huge fan of store-bought icing (I could buy other toppings though). I can also bring a small cooler if needed, but I wanted to check first if anyone has creative ideas that may be simpler or more durable than buttercream.

I’m trying to decide between the following Breast Pumps. All are partially covered by insurance. I’m a FTM and still pregnant so whether I’ll be able to pump at all is still speculative.

I am currently out of work but ideally I will be eventually working a desk job where I can pump while working if needed, so I like the idea of a Wearable pump. But I’d also rather not need multiple pumps from the get go or spend hundreds out of pocket.

So far my shortlist is:
Eufy S1 $180
Momcozy M9 $100
Spectra S1 $75

There is also the Spectra S2 I can get for free but I hate the idea of having to be connected to a wall.

Nearing the end of my 2nd trimester and tried on some maternity yoga pants from Old Navy. I HATED the over the bump compression and thought it was so uncomfortable.

I’m tempted to just wear my old yoga pants but I’m worried I’ll irreversibly stretch them out. Any lower-cut options that work with a bump? Or softer materials with slightly less compression? Heat friendly options are welcome too since it’s getting towards summer.

Edit: to all those who recommended CRZ, thank you - they’re a lighter fabric than I normally wear but that also means they’re so much more comfortable than the Old Navy ones on the bump. They’re easy to roll down too!

I have been wearing almost exclusively Cuup bras for the last 6 or 7 years, and I’d like to share my thoughts as someone who has tried on (and worn out) a number of their models. Looking around this sub I’ve seen some curiosity and some critique. I wouldn’t call myself a Cuup evangelist because I think some of the critiques are correct - I especially think durability is a brand weakness I hope they can fix. Instead, I think they’re the perfect bra for a certain type of person, or maybe a certain type of breast.

TLDR Cuup might be right for you if
- you want a minimalist bra that is comfortable while providing more support and lift than your average wireless bra
- you don’t like heavy seams or padding
- you have sensory issues around certain bras
- you want a bra that won’t show under t-shirts
- you have a small band/large cup and need a bra in your size (Edit: not that small apparently)
- you have wide roots and/or shallow breasts
- you want a modal blend bra
- if you have short roots I recommend the balconette. If you have tall roots like me I recommend the plunge.

TLDR Cuup might not be right for you if
- you have very narrow breasts and/or narrow roots
- you don’t want your nipples showing under any circumstances
- you like padding, lace, or foam cups
- you need heavy support
- you want a “forever” bra

My journey
As part of a wardrobe refresh I decided I was tired of the padded foam bras I was wearing and wanted something lighter. I visited a very reputable local bra store and was measured as 32D, but walked home in something so uncomfortable I wanted to tear it off almost immediately. Bad choice. I found Cuup through their online ads tried them on along with a number of other hot online companies but theirs were by far the most comfortable. The cups were silky soft and barely there. I bought a couple in 32DD.

I didn’t overthink this until I became pregnant and my breasts suddenly changed size again. This led me to do a bit more research - I learned that I have perky, close set breasts with even fullness, tall roots, and some protection. I also learned that a lot of people don’t like Cuup. But I ended up buying more of their bras, this time in 34G.

Reviews of models I’ve tried

The Plunge - this is my favorite of their bras and the one I would recommend for anyone with tall roots and center fullness. It comes in a few different materials which are all fairly different. I have had the best luck using the biggest recommended ABTF American cup size and the outside part of the wire still runs wider than my roots, but this doesn’t really bother me.

The Plunge in Modal - silky soft cups. Considerably more durable than mesh with slightly better coverage, and more support than wireless. The biggest downside is that the top seams are visible under a very thin t-shirt.

The Plunge in Mesh - this is the most invisible bra you will ever wear. As long as the color doesn’t show, there will be no visible seams even under the thinnest t-shirt. If your nipples are hard they will also show through. When people complain about durability, this is by far the worst culprit, as I’ve found their mesh stretches out more quickly than their other materials. Because the cups are so thin the wires also feel more prominent here and seem to be doing more of the lifting work. Because they are always changing seasonal colors these are easy to find on sale.

The Wireless Plunge - I have only tried this one in modal and it has a different profile than their other plunge bras; it feels more like a hybrid between their plunge and their scoop. It is however, one of the most supportive wireless bras I’ve ever tried. It does run higher along the armpits and in the center. I have not tried it in mesh.

The Scoop - this fit me about as well as the Plunge and I used to own one, but I didn’t like how high it rode along my armpits and retired it. The Micro fabric is very soft but I haven’t tried their modal or lace bras yet.

The Balconette - not for me, but I think this would be a good fit for someone with shallow boobs and smaller roots on top. These gave me quad boob. I haven’t tried The Longline or The Strapless but these seem to have a similar silhouette.

The Demi - this seemed like something I’d like: I didn’t. I found the fabric really uncomfortable. This was years ago, so maybe they’ve changed things up.

The Full Coverage - haven’t tried it but I’m not a huge fan of full coverage bras in general so I don’t expect I’d like it.

I’ve never tried their underwear or swimwear.

They used to have a model called The Triangle which I loved but they retired it and folded it into their plunge line.

Their return policy used to be a little better than it is now. As of last time I checked free returns are gone and they allow free exchanges instead. This is good if you’re the wrong size, but less good if you hate everything about the brand. They were acquired by FullBeauty in 2023 and have made some brand changes since then.

This is not vegan-specific, but I am a vegan mom-to-be in the 2nd trimester of my first pregnancy.

I think my baby may be going through a growth spurt because I have had nonstop sugar cravings the last few weeks. I have been baking vegan goodies once a week, but then I seem to want to more on top of that.

I have my GD test next week and I’m honestly kind of nervous about it.

I was a pretty healthy weight pre-pregnancy and I’ve gained about 5lbs more than the recommended so far, mostly in the first trimester since I felt nauseous if I didn’t eat every few hours.

I do try and eat nutritiously during my main meals but my digestion has gotten so sluggish that I don’t really crave protein outside of big meals and seem to just want quick calories instead. I also take all my vitamins including a prenatal and iron supplement.

I know that if my GD test comes back fine it’s not a huge deal, but so long to eating healthy.

I am expecting my first child and trying to plan out what I need once it’s born in a few months. This includes making a registry and trying to make sure them and all their belongings can fit into my house once they’re bigger and more mobile than a newborn.

I currently live in a 2 bedroom, 1 bath 900 sq ft house with a yard with my husband and 40-lb dog in a HCOL city. Buying a bigger place in this market is out of the question. The biggest problem is that we both have WFH desk setups - we are not both actively working from home but we have and there is a decent chance we will be in the future.

**Question 1** concerns my housing layout - I’d like to hear what worked for other minimalist and small-home parents. We currently have a combo dining/living room, a bedroom and a home office, with a secondary desk in our bedroom.

The easiest thing for us would be to move the (smaller) bedroom desk into the living room behind our couch, reducing the floor space in front of the couch and then moving a crib and any baby storage into a corner in our room. But this requires the child to live in our room past babyhood.

The second option would be to convert our second bedroom into a child’s room, but this would require moving my (bigger) desk with multiple monitors, a bookshelf/file cabinet, and a dog crate out of the room, plus we use the closet space for our coats since we don’t have additional closet space. It’s a fairly large room. I’m not sure that sharing my office with a baby/toddler would be pleasant for anyone, although maybe we could use it for storage for a while.

**Question 2** concerns our registry. We do not want to accumulate more than whatever is super helpful, and we are happy to acquire items used when convenient. We have already acquired a convertible crib, lightweight stroller, infant car seat with extra base and a hand-me-down high chair. We are asking for a Baby Bjorn rocker, one baby carrier, a cheap changing pad, a modular pen, and an assortment of fabric and hygiene products. We are not asking for a pack and play as that feels excessive with our space. We did not ask for many clothes, but hope we can obtain some secondhand.

I’d love to hear from other minimalist parents on what you loved and needed and didn’t. I am already overwhelmed by the amount of stuff I’m supposed to acquire and I am a bit tired of seeing whole nursery setups for unborn babies as if I have the money or space to decorate an entire room.

Wondering if anyone else has felt totally unfocused after a tough workout.

I’ve been mostly good about self-regulating and not pushing myself as hard as I used to. Before pregnancy I was climbing in a gym 2-3x/week and at 20 weeks it’s more like twice a month since I can’t boulder anymore and only do top rope. Add 15+ lbs of weight gain to that and pregnancy hormones and my stamina is down.

Did one climb that was a little challenging and decided to push through it when I was almost at the top. Afterwards felt completely unfocused, brain fog, like all of my blood was going to my forearms and not my brain. I wasn’t dizzy or lightheaded, but it was bad to the point where I was worried about driving myself home.

Wondering if there’s a quick way to prevent it if that happens again. Protein shakes used to be my go to but since pregnancy I no longer like the taste. Maybe I just need to stack up on healthy to-go snacks.

I’m almost 20 weeks pregnant and my bras were getting tight so I used a fit calculator which told me I should be wearing a 34DDD.

I normally wear a 32DD and my preferred bra has always been the Cuup plunge, which I normally find very comfortable.

I tried the same model in a 34F and it has a few minor issues.
- I have to extend the band slightly to get it on, but it’s comfy.
- the cups are a little too wide, and the wire digs into my armpits. This is not comfy. On the 32DD this was never a problem. I think this is because my rib cage has gotten deeper but not wider.
- there is a little bit of spillage from the top - not too much.

Since exchanges are free but take time, I want to order the right size. Also since I’m still growing, I’m probably better off going a little too big than too small. I’m a little lost on how to approach this.
- order a 36F and hope I’m not drowning in the cups
- order a 34G, which will likely fix the spillage but not the side issues.
- order a 32G, possibly H, and use a 3rd party band extender
- the size is right, but the bra is wrong
- a different approach entirely?