u/Individual_Cress_726

I have been out of the church for 6 years now and every time I feel like me and my immediate family can peacefully coexist, something like this happens. For reference, my brother is autistic and tends to use very dramatic language like this quite often + is quite conservative Adventist (I can understand that the structure is comforting for him). However, he is a 33 year old man, very high functioning/low support needs, and I feel like this was so unnecessary to send me in the middle of the night out of the blue. (Of course I care deeply about him and wanted to take him seriously so I told him that if he felt that way he should go to the hospital or text the crisis line. I’ve also had multiple family members this morning check on him.)

Anyways, I suppose I’m not really asking for advice, just moreso comfort. It’s been an emotional wringer with my family for years (3 sda pastors in my immediate family). I would however love any empowering books or podcasts on religious trauma or positive stories you have as well. Thank you all!

matched with a girl on hinge today and we’ve been texting back and forth, she asked me if I want to FaceTime (2 hours from now) and now I’m wondering if I need to change and put makeup on (that’s what I would normally do for a date, but is this a date?). Also lighting? I like the idea of video chat to vibe check before we plan a first date, but I think I look better in person and maybe the techniques are different. And should it just be a casual chat or more first date vibes? (I definitely overthink I’ll admit it) would love some help <3

I have really long, thick hair and it seems like I can’t focus to save my mind with it on my head. To tell the truth I used to have all manner of haircuts like lobs, bobs (not my look) pixies (also not my look) and at one point a baby mullet with the sides shaved (I loved it but was sooo much maintenance). I haven’t wanted to cut it because I’m graduating in December and think long hair will be pretty, and also think it would be irrational to pay for a haircut just for my sanity, especially since it’s so pretty. I know I’m definitely overthinking it, but I think I’m looking for people who can relate and maybe share some advice <3

I’ve been doing lots of research online and see contrasting information on how to keep yourself + your pets safe while doing nails. Do you have a set up that you use, and a specific mask you prefer? Thanks in advance for your help <3

I currently need to build up an emergency fund and was looking at finances realizing that going in for my $55 dip manicures. Every three weeks is really hindering that. I am wondering if I should buy a nail tech set off of Amazon during prime days and just learn how to do my nails myself. I like having a thickness to my nails because I tend to scratch my skin and it tends to leave less damage – I also feel more put together. I’m just concerned about doing it myself because I’ve heard horror stories about people developing allergies and things like that however, I did go to beauty school for skin, and so I have a pretty good understanding of sanitation , etc. I would love to hear both your opinions and advice. And if you do recommend that, I try this myself any tips or product recommendations would be helpful. Thank you so very much in advance.<3

It seems like anytime this week I try to do any physical exertion my body completely shuts down. All of the regular things that always make me feel better just don’t feel accessible to me right now and mostly just laying down and watching positive TV shows but wondering if any of you have recommendations for things that make you feel better on days where you can’t really do much. <3

So I had a great date with a beautiful woman the other day. She made us reservations at a fancy Italian restaurant, we talked the entire time until closing about our shared interests and then I treated her to ice cream afterwards. We brought each other flowers. We had a kiss at the end of the date and then talked later about how we liked it and she thanked me for asking her first.

with women, I’m very shy to make the first move( – I think that this stems from trauma from men, but that’s probably irrelevant to this anyways.)

we are having our second date on Monday night, and we are going to cook and craft together- at my place!!!. I suppose I’d like advice on knowing how to flirt and do the appropriate amount of physical touch, because I’m just so used to other people initiating. I also want to know how I can make it romantic? I know the obvious things like mood, lighting, music and stuff but I could just really use some advice on all of this in general <3.

Sincerely, a beginner femme lesbian

UPDATE: Apparently, our first date was her first date with a woman. She texted me today saying that she wasn't ready to date. Maybe my nerves were trying to tell me something, but I'm sure there's someone out there for me somewhere :)

I do my very best to have self-compassion and rely on my toolkit from therapy and my support system, but I can't seem to shake the feeling that I would be more worthy if I were getting loads done all the time.