u/InnerRelation7844

Idk who needs to hear this today but no, that one thing you did as a child that was kind of weird is not a sign you have autism, neurotypical people have weird quirks too and especially kids. Even if you still do it now. You're fine 😭 🫶

No, not even if it's a symptom of autism, you can have those just from mimicking your parents. No, crying because you don't understand how to cope with something they never taught you how to do or cope with doesn't mean you're having a meltdown either. They were supposed to teach you that years ago.

Also, if you freak out trying new things or breaking routine, that's probably just because your parents kept freaking out on you if they did either of those, so you gained the fear from watching them. Ask me how I know 😐

Edit: Please read this before commenting

I've seen a lot of posts about ENFPs with BPD / borderline but not a single one from anyone with NPD or ASPD. So I'm kinda wondering what people know about those ENFPs.

I've been browsing the subreddit and I've seen a lot of people say it's impossible which was kinda funny considering I got medically recognized with traits of both lol so it prompted me to write this. But I'm curious. Maybe you're curious too so you can ask whatever xx

Why is it that the one unfixable unmedicate-able disorder has such a good rep? The person with it often suffers with no way to improve without extensive therapy that often has to start from a very early age or else they end up traumatized and unable to manage it as adults, which then causes them to harm those around them and especially their children.

I heard my friend talk about his schizophrenic neighbor who took her meds and was just completely normal and immediately wondered what it would be like. Would my dad have a job? Would we be able to go on vacation? To the restaurant? Would my mom understand my jokes without getting confused and taking them seriously? Would I stop hearing their meltdowns and arguments?

Yesterday I started talking about my dad with my mom and she kept excusing his behaviors because he didn't mean it and he can't help them. So I just broke down crying and asked:

What horrible sins have I committed in a past life to deserve this?

Why do I have to witness my friends have normal family members and pretend I'm not profoundly revolted by it?

I didn't do anything wrong, so why? I deserve better than this.

And she just stayed quiet and kept talking about our vacation plans calmly. And I guess I didn't feel upset because I realized I can't fix what has been broken long before I came into this world.

They'll never change. They can't. And I'll always be haunted by it. Lol

Edit Guys I think 7 comments is enough I get it 😭 I'd like it if you actually cared about how I feel instead of repeating the same thing over and over

Does anyone else have parents who keep saying this shit and just physically walking away or ignoring you the MOMENT you show any negative reactions to their bullshit?!

My mom: says or does something turbo socially stupid towards me

Me: Please stop fucking doing that you're hurting me. That's not how it works. explains something she should already know but can't

My mom: Why are you speaking to me like that? I'm leaving this conversation.

And then she thinks I'm just being cruel when I ask why the fuck she's actively walking away from me, and acts like she was being helpful to not escalate it. She refuses to ever discuss anything.

Is this an autism thing??? Grown ass woman acting like being confronted on her negative actions is verbal abuse 😭

My dad is even worse (he's more autistic) and just storms off like a teenage boy. Like whatever man.

Oh my fucking god bro just talk to me face-to-face like normal people. Why do they do this?! I don't care about your comfort TALK TO ME!!! I'm your CHILD.

When I point out their bad behaviors due to autism they just look either confused or sad and start trying to excuse themselves. Sometimes my mom starts crying because she feels so guilty. Why do I feel so bad? You traumatized me and ruined my childhood because you couldn't manage your autism, work, life. And yet when I point out anything you did you genuinely meant well and unconditionally loved me while doing those things.

Sometimes I wish you loved me less so I could have become my own person, but you love me so much that it just hurts and I feel guilty for treating you like an equal adult. I love you, why can't you change for me?

Genuinely got nauseous lol it's such an issue that no one else would understand. Autistic this autistic that, it's always about comparing me to the disorder that ruined me without me even having it, isn't it? I will never be my own person.

I really need to stop talking to neurodivergent people, they just end up trying to self-diagnose everything I do. Sorry if that sounds mean. I'm just frustrated. It shouldn't be a big deal but it fills me with self-hatred. 2021 really turned most people my age into pseudo-psychologists...

It also doesn't mean speaking in a forced baby voice and acting like their friend. Everyone can tell you're doing it wrong except you. And of course she makes me do it too and says I'm rude if I just act normal.

Ughhhhhhhhhhh small vent post. I mean it's so bad that when I was dying and the hospital staff wouldn't bother trying to set an appointment and I obviously was being rude to them because of it, she took THEIR side 😅 😅 😅

What are some things you absolutely love that your family does?

For me, I LOVE how kind they are. Even my very European 95 year old grandma who can barely read and write is so genuinely sweet and incapable of being racist. We just had a conversation about how pretty the super dark skinned football players are and how she loves their afro braids and ponytails! I even remember bringing my trans gay friend over and my granny tried her best to adjust to his pronouns 🥹 AND my whole family tried to get me to marry my best friend who is bi and looks like a girl LMFAOOOOO

For my autistic parents specifically, I was always taught to respect rules and be kind to servers, cashiers, teachers etc. I was taught to never judge people based on ethnicity, religion, sexuality, gender or race. I was taught I would be loved unconditionally no matter what (even if I didn't believe it until I became an adult). I wasn't scolded for having bad grades and struggling in school, and they would constantly say they were proud of how intelligent I was anyways even when I was failing a lot of subjects. I seriously appreciate it

I know not everyone has positive things to say about their family or parents, but I think it's nice to talk about the nice things if we have any 😊 🫶

Kids don't pick and choose what leaves them traumatized or not. Just because our parents didn't mean to be abusive or neglectful doesn't mean they weren't. Just because our parents loved us and were good people doesn't mean they didn't fuck us up. Just because they "only" have autism or ADHD doesn't mean they have an excuse. You don't have to hate them and you don't have to love them either. You don't have to accept any of it. You don't have to justify your trauma to anyone. That's all.

NO! You don't get it because you're autistic! You don't understand anything I find funny and I have to spoonfeed explain it to you! And you STILL don't understand the joke after I do!!!

Super specific to what just happened now but "Could prime Sergio Perez defend against Genghis Khan" is a video title anyone who knows F1 and history would understand. You know about both and you still don't get it even when I explain the pun to you 😭 😭 😭 You don't understand sarcasm or irony when I learned how to be sarcastic at 4 years of age and had to stop because you couldn't understand any of my jokes growing up. It's always about giving up things for my parents because they don't have the capacity to understand anything I say or do. UGHHHHHHHHHH EYE ROLL

Your personal comfort couldn't possibly be more important than tending to your child. If I yell for help you won't hear it; if I talk to you you don't notice. You literally just text me to communicate and get whiny if I don't instantly reply because I expect you to talk to me. And you have the audacity to BOTH wear them all the time?! Take those stupid fucking things off holy shit. I get my school teachers I really do. Just LISTEN TO ME!!!

Hiii guys I use Twitter as my main social media because the side I'm on is like a WAY better Pinterest, it's just pictures and fashion and reuploads of vintage magazines, news about music etc! However I made a new account for like, every topic I enjoy because the timeline algorithm is so awful that trying to keep it all in one 😭

I kinda want a new one to talk to my friends but I reached the account limit! 😢😢😢 Is there any way to make one more? Like can I download an APK or something? Thank you very much!!!

Hiii guys I use Twitter as my main social media because the side I'm on is like a WAY better Pinterest, it's just pictures and fashion and reuploads of vintage magazines, news about music etc! However I made a new account for like, every topic I enjoy because the timeline algorithm is so awful that trying to keep it all in one 😭

I kinda want a new one to talk to my friends but I reached the account limit! 😢😢😢 Is there any way to make one more? Like can I download an APK or something? Thank you very much!!!

"Are you autistic? It's genetic lol" No

"But you act autistic" No shit bro I wonder who raised me. Also no, being quirky doesn't make me autistic. Do you need my psychiatrist's personal note or something

"I'm autistic and don't act like that" Has the diagnosis become Me Specifically Disorder instead of Autism Spectrum Disorder and I didn't notice

"That doesn't sound like autism" You don't even know them but thanks I appreciate a professional opinion

"Sounds like NPD" I'm so sorry to tell you this, but... you have AIO Comment Section Syndrome 😢 😭

"Why are you blaming their behavior on their autism?" I read the symptoms in the DSM-5/ICD-11 and have autistic friends and dealt with managing their autism my entire life and possess cognitive skills yes. You know. Other than my mom being informally diagnosed as a kid and my dad (vaguely gestures towards him)

"You can be autistic and an asshole" The asshole part doesn't cancel out the autism part 💔

"Sounds like BPD" ??????????????

"Autism doesn't do that" Okay I didn't know autism doesn't cause struggles with reading your child's emotions, sensory meltdowns and communication difficulties but thanks for the input

"Your parents are just bad people" Pinning all their struggles with their neurodivergence on them being "bad people" is just ableism

"They're just manipulating you pretending to be autistic" Bruh

"Sounds like [Literally any other disorder]" Omg bruh

"They didn't mean it so you're just overreacting" 😑😑😑😑😑

"Why are you saying autistic people act like that" Duuuuuuuuude 😭 why does it stop being a spectrum when you feel offended by me mentioning my parents' disorder 😭 😭 😭 this is not about youuuuu 😭😭😭😭😭

"You just hate autistic people" I don't even HATE MY PARENTS 😂😂😂💥💥💥

Posting this here because you guys would understand way better than normal vent subreddits. I'm so scared of my mom dying and having to support my dad while he stays in my apartment all day watching Twitch streams. I'm so scared. I don't know what to do to help him anymore. He can't get a job and I'm so afraid he'll be homeless. I love him but I can't live like this.

My mom is so overworked and strained and she has to work multiple jobs to support us because of him being unemployed. He barely helps around the house and all he does is cook and wash/groom the dog, doesn't even do the dishes after. I wouldn't mind if my mom wasn't so overworked, I keep asking him to share them with me but he gets overwhelmed. He won't even let me go anywhere because it will ruin the spot he parked his car because he's autistic and gets overwhelmed trying to find a new spot.

Ughhhhhhh. I just want a normal dad sometimes. And I'm scared about the future. I wish I had a dad that could do stuff with me and not just stay in his room for years. I can't just send him off to a group home but I can't let him be homeless! But it would fuck my whole future up. I can't do this. I love him so much. It hurts that he can't just not be like this. Please just change I don't want you to suffer anymore

And I mean it. I love my dad. I love him so much. I don't want anyone in the comments being mean to him okay? Because he genuinely does love me too, and he cares about my mom. I know he doesn't want to burden me and I'm terrified of him k*lling himself if what I said happens. He tries his best to help even though he doesn't have life skills. He tries to inconvenience himself and ignore his autism struggles to make me happy. It's just that these massive hurdles to him produce really minimal results...

My sister and her husband are both incredibly smart people, and they're trying to raise their daughter Amanda to also be really smart, but really they've set their child up to be 'the weird kid'.

They never baby talked for her entire life. No mama or dada, no lovey's, doggy's, not even a 'yummy' it was always the full words and they had her use full words when talking about anything too. So now they have a 5 year old running around talking like a tiny professor. Which is cute if you're an adult watching them correctly use 'excessive' in a sentence, but makes her stick out among a bunch of other kids who have no idea what it means. It also took her way longer to start speaking at all than our younger cousins or their children.

The kid is 5 years old, and has never seen any kind of TV that isn't Steve Irwin reruns or used a touch screen for anything. Which isn't necessarily bad, but it does mean that she doesn't know any Disney movie's, she's never seen any bluey, played any games, or anything else that the rest of the class is into and therefore can't join in when they're talking about that kind of thing. It's making her stick out even more. At pick up yesterday just about everyone was singing songs from Trolls and she was just standing off to the side watching.

Some of their test taking is also done on tablets, and she has no idea what to do when she's handed one, and the teacher doesn't seem to know what to do with a kid that needs instructions on how to navigate them.

This is her first year in a group environment, previously she's always been watched either by family or by a baby sitter, so no day care or pre school of any kind. As a result, this kid is absolutely miserable at school, where not only does she have to fight to get the only adult to pay attention to her, but all the other kids want little to nothing to do with her.

She sticks out, has pretty much no friends and she really hates it. I watch her for a couple of hours after school let's out until their parents get off work and it's so awful asking how the day went and hearing them describe being left out or made fun of. Now the first kids are having birthday parties and my niece isn't invited to either of the ones happening over the weekend, even though basically the entire class is going.

I really hate seeing her so miserable. I feel like if she'd been in group care previously, or even seen some of the most popular shows or movies a little she would have such an easier time with making friends.

But I can't say any of this out loud to my sister, or even my parents who like how 'traditional' her up bringing is and constantly go on long winded rants about how technology is killing society and we're all becoming Wall-E.

There's nothing I can really do but watch her be miserable coming home and it fucking sucks. I can comfort her all I want, but the next day it's all the same.