u/LivMealown

I'm pre-diagnosis but pretty sure I have LPR (going to an ENT in a couple of months). I'm not going to want to take any PPIs or other GERD meds as they tend to mess with my stomach. I bought my first tube of Reflux Gourmet but it's $$.

Then I noticed that the generic "antacid tablets" I have in my medicine cabinet have ALGINIC ACID listed as the first "inactive" ingredient. I know that's not the same as sodium alginate - but does it have a similar effect?

My symptoms are pretty mild so it's actually kind of hard to tell when something I'm taking is helping...

TLDR: I love dogs, but don't want another with my husband. What do I do if he brings one home without asking?

UPDATED to clarify that the local government-run shelter (where I spotted him visiting, today) is filled to the brim, and (I will call to confirm) they do NOT do home visits or have many rules about who can/can't adopt. If someone is willing to take a dog, they are generally allowed to with NO background/home checks.

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I'm in a long-term bad marriage with a man I don't trust. (Please save the "get a divorce" advice - there's reasons that are NOT good, that I stay, but it is what it is, right now.) I'm asking this sub because I'm over 60 and feel better about getting advice from women who have lived some.

I'm a HUGE dog lover. My husband calls himself a dog person but, every single time that we have adopted (4, so far), he has threatened, within the first 6-9 months, to "send the dog back." He is childish (despite achieving 70+ years on earth) and has anger issues and BIG TIME control issues and, if the dog doesn't behave exactly as he thinks it should, within weeks of adoption, he thinks the dog is deliberately trying to be bad. He is an idiot. But this has happened EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

Our 3rd dog was one that he wanted, and I did not. We already had a dog, and I'm the primary caregiver/exerciser/payer for our dogs, so one was enough for me. I made him promise that HE would take her to training, and we got her. I fell in love with her right away. He chose to take her to a chain pet store for training and do NOTHING with her, between classes, to train, so she was wild and behaved badly - and chewed up some of his stuff. I happened to catch him on "dog cam" from work one day, SCREAMING at her, throwing things at her crate while she was in it - I can't begin to describe the vitriol and I immediately told my boss I had to go home. I separated the dogs and myself from him for days. This was some time ago and I don't remember how it was "resolved," if he EVER took responsibility or apologized, but it wasn't, really, resolved. From that day forward, she was MINE (by my choice) and I told him I would call the cops on him for animal abuse if I ever caught him behaving that way again. He eventually - as he always does - warmed to her again (because she behaved better under my close watch) and things settled down. But I promised myself then that, after these 2 dogs were gone, I was never getting another with him.

After she died - he tried to adopt. On a day when he thought I wouldn't be home, he arranged a home visit with a rescue. I stayed out of sight knowing I would not let this happen, but didn't get involved because I didn't want to put that person in the middle. As she was leaving, however, the rescue person apparently overheard me arguing with him and they rejected his application (thank dog!).

When my last (heart) dog died in February, I started to give away all our "dog stuff" to rescues. He keeps hinting at wanting another, and I tell him flat out that I don't want another dog, and he doesn't understand why (though I have told him). He keeps stealing the dog stuff that I pile up to donate, and hides it away from me. He is rebuilding a fence in our back yard that is only needed if we have a dog. He's being sneaky, and deceitful and, today, when I checked his location on my phone - he was at the animal shelter.

I, of course, would LOVE to have a dog ... without him. I forgot to mention that, with our dogs, the care always falls to me. I'm the one who walks them religiously, entertains them, takes them to the vet and pays for it, researches food choices and pays for it, buys all the toys and treats and ... basically everything. He may prepare their meals and sometimes cleans up, but 90-95% of the work is me. That's partly because I love them, partly because I don't trust him, and partly because he is what's known today as "under-functioning:" He just doesn't know how to do adult things, and has no interest in learning (why should he? I do it all). EVEN if I did want another dog with him, though - I just stopped caregiving for our last one a few months ago. I'm tired. And still grieving.

SO if he should somehow manage to bring home a dog against my will - what do I do? It will kill me to return it (I'm fall in love with them quickly). It will scare me to ever leave it alone with him. It will PISS ME OFF no end that he's gone and done it, knowing I did not want him to. I will want to leave him but NOT alone with a dog. I'm anticipating something that may not happen, but am very fearful of his history of moods and anger and irresponsibility.

I dread the kind of feedback I'm going to get from this post, but my marriage is f**ked up and hard to explain, and the reasons I'm still in it are only partly clear, even to myself - so please be pragmatic but kind. And thank you for, if nothing else, letting me vent. I do plan to talk to my therapist about this, but she doesn't give advice.

Country
USA

Budget
Would like to spend less than $500 USD (so I can afford a Macbook Neo, too!)

Are you open to refurbs/used options?
Absolutely. My current laptop was a refurb, bought 10 years ago.

Screen size
15.6 - 16"

Weight limit
Light enough to comfortable sit for hours on my lap, but I won't be carrying it anywhere, most likely

Purpose
Browsing, email (Outlook desktop), Microsoft Office (including semi-intensive Excel use with formulas, multiple sheet workbooks, and VBA), Quicken software with large file and some playing around with programming.

Form factor
Standard

Intended usage
See "Purpose"

Desired battery life
Not picky as I could use plugged in, but would like at least a couple of hours. Longevity of the battery more important that time-per-use.

Please list, in order of most important to least important, the priority between Size, Weight, Performance, Battery life
Performance, size, weight, battery

Info/Requirements
Would prefer Intel but only because I don't know enough. Want an SSD, not an HD. Would like Windows 11 PRO, not Home, if possible. Because I will likely buy a refurb to keep cost low - I'm most curious about how OLD (release date) is too old to last another 10 years. I'm currently considering an HP that came out in 2020, and that feels like it might be too old to stay current for 10 years.

The T-Mobile commercial featuring Sarah and Frank Boal, just an AWFUL stereotype of what retirees are supposed to act like. And played every damned 5 minutes, it seems. Frank and his "It's like ... Ahhh!" attempt to act "hip." Go away.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8d_wTpPe3A0

I'm striving to be less "how I wish things were" or "how I think things should be" and be more rational. Seems like "acceptance" is something I should be working on.

I found a copy of Tara Brach's "Radical Acceptance" on my e-Library, and it started out bad, for me, feeling very "woo," at first, and feeling like it focused on SELF-acceptance, and not REALITY-acceptance.

So it got me wondering - is there a concise place that explains the differences between the way "acceptance" is learned through DBT, through ACT, and through Tara Brach? I'd like to find the one that fits my needs best, before wasting time going down a wrong path.

I need to stay vague, because I have an unrealistic concern about my therapist recognizing that I'm talking about them!

I've been seeing them for 2+ years. I've always been a little put-off by their therapy clichés like "I honor that position," which is repeated multiple times per session. I've managed to let that go for the years I've seen them, but I'm also not crazy about the frequent references to their own family, life, history, situations. They tell me a LOT about some of their other clients' stories.

And, worst of all - I just don't feel like we're moving forward. I have asked repeated for clear and distinct instructions, each session, on what I should work on before the next session. I rarely get anything. I'm allowed to just vent and rant and talk in circles, and I leave feeling like all I did was vent and rant and I didn't GET anything from it except for temporary relief.

But the idea of telling them I'm not coming back or - worse yet - I want to try another therapist within their large practice (and potentially run into them in the future when I'm in the waiting room!) leaves me feeling a little trapped. I am not brave, I don't like "rejecting" people. I feel stuck. I also feel like I'm throwing my copayments away.

But, when I talk about not feeling like I'm improving on the things I want to improve, they point out miniscule changes or realizations that I've had. I need better than miniscule. I'm older, and don't have decades to change for the better.

I know the answer here is to find another therapist. I know therapists supposedly don't take it personally when you leave them. I'm still having trouble deciding if/how to do that.

I have all the symptoms of LPR and have just had an upper endoscopy to rule out that anything in the area of that scope was causing my problems.

I'm on "regular" health insurance, right now, but going on a pretty good Medicare plan in about 3 months.

Does anyone have the actual name of the procedure that ENTs do to "scope" your throat to diagnose LPR, and the CPT/billing code that is used when they do it in-office? I want to compare the coverage between my current insurance and my upcoming Medicare coverage, and I need the code to do that.

There's a message in the sub that says to read the Wiki before posting, but the wiki is disabled.

I was hoping to find advice about how to accept payment if selling a book. Any tips? How do you time shipping vs. being paid, and what forms of payment do people safely use, in this sub?

thanks

I'm not yet living alone, but am trying to prepare for that eventuality.

Has anyone ever used Uber or Lyft to take them and pick them up from a procedure, but also transport a companion who stays for the length of the procedure? I mean, doctors' offices can't care HOW you get to-and-fro as long as you've got the required companion, right?

EDIT: I'm probably going to get called some names for this, but ... it's shocking how many people either didn't fully read my question or understand it - yet still replied. Reddit becomes less and less useful every day.

I got a couple of good answers, though - enough to know that this option may be viable.

I’ve seen plenty of comments about the horrible writing in the later seasons. I don’t really know why I find it important enough to post this but, as someone who absolutely loved watching the early seasons of Law and order, and who finally got a DVR and so can catch up on later seasons, I’m so confused.

Just as an example, season 25. I started watching it thinking it was going to be the same old law and order. I was disappointed immediately but decided to keep watching because of the “quality” of the cast. I’ve been forcing myself to watch but I guess I need to quit, because I can’t stand seeing actors that I like perform so badly. The acting is just horrible. Either over-the-top or constant stone-faced and dead-pan . Have they just given up on their careers and are doing this for the money?

Just venting. Sad to see something or someone continue, when it’s clear they really don’t care, anymore.

I see plenty of posts about how lousy iPhone dictation has gotten.

I used to get mad that it wouldn’t correctly transcribe what I was saying. That it would put in completely wrong words.

Now, I’m finding that, if it doesn’t “understand“ what I’m saying, it just skips the words. It leaves words out and I have to go back and reread the entire thing to find where it skipped over what I said.

Seems like they decided it was better to quit than to try.

I’ve had many colonoscopies and have never worried about this, but a friend of mine had a perforation during a colonoscopy and nearly died, a couple of years ago. Plus, four years ago, I learned I had a tortuous colon. So I’m more paranoid about it, now.

I had a colonoscopy today. I know that the signs of perforation are severe pain and nausea and vomiting. But when would symptoms arise? Does it depend on how severe the perforation is, or would you start to feel this almost right away, after the colonoscopy?

No real reason to believe that I need to worry about this, but I’m having slightly more discomfort than I’ve ever had before, post procedure.

Hope it's okay to ask this here: for some reason, I saved LOTS of negatives from pictures taken decades ago. I'm in my elderly "I would love to remember my life" phase, and would like to see what's on these negatives, and possibly print some of them.

Without a darkroom (and no desire to have one) - what are my options? How can I most affordably review and possibly revive the photos I took in the 1970's-2000's from their negatives?

Thanks for any recommendations...

I can see "A highlight" in the reading journey for a book I've returned - but it doesn't show the complete text that I've highlighted (at least, it doesn't seem to). How do I see the entirety of what I've highlighted?

On the unlikely chance that anyone who reads this subscribes to the Substack of Howard Luks, MD - I would love to see the full text of this article that he wrote: "Bone: The Biology, the DEXA, and the Load It Actually Needs. It's a Fascinating Tissue Many Ignore."

I would subscribe, but the budget prohibits it...