u/Lucky-Sound-8162

https://preview.redd.it/gsfgdeg1lojh1.png?width=554&format=png&auto=webp&s=f446cecf9b8dd1ad77593ade9ec07e8ab442a285

Why shouldn't you just let people who wanna die, die? Not all suicide is an involuntary hiccup, or a sudden build up of emotions. Sometimes people just have a shitty life, and shitty brain... no amount of material/social achievement or therapy fixes them.

Just let them die? Whats wrong with it? No... really? Do we still believe that suicide sends people into hell or something?

Most problems in life, are an aspect of life itself. If you enjoy yours, be my guest and live fully... Most people however only have a set amount of money, set number of people, and set number of opportunities... after that its just a grind to simply survive...

Whats the point in that? If you find a point in that don't kill yourself, no issue... Why project your own fear of death and loss onto others and stop them from doing it?

...let me get what I want. Lord knows, it would be the first time... Lord knows, it would be the first time...

Can anyone DM me the means to end it? Something painless... preferably. Just something that guarantees the end.

Why is it required for everyone to keep living? What are we supposed to do here? Is there something here we need to do?

It has been shitty for a very long time. Not shitty exactly, but just... eh?

I coasted through high-school, good grades, okay in other activities, a couple of friends, staff and teachers generally liked me. But internally I had no idea what I was doing, or why I was doing all of it. Getting up, going to school, putting effort in my studies, in my relationships, in my hobbies... but I really didn't know why.

I was always so tired, I couldn't keep this mask on... like I was a normal person, saying things I actually mean, when I was just copying others and saying what I was supposed to, doing things I was supposed to do, wanting things I was supposed to want. I just figured if I put enough effort, find a way to fit in, eventually things would work out... eventually it would make sense.

I don't really want anything. In college people were a lot more agentic, since things were a lot less structured. Many profs and colleagues constantly asked me to think for myself. They told me to really think what I want, instead of listening to what society and others tell you what you should. Only then you would have real agency and belief in your actions.

...But more I thought about it, about myself... I didn't really want anything. I was just going through the motions, because that's what you are supposed to. But the more I think about this... about myself, and about other people... it doesn't make sense at all. Why? Why should I continue doing this?

Why should I suffer through this? Why do you want me to put in all this pointless effort? Everyone is going to die anyway, how is it somehow okay if I die against my will?

Then why is death bad? I don't get it. I didn't ask to be here... in a sense no one did... but clearly other people have it figured out in someway shape or form... I don't, I can't figure it out. I can only act that I do. I just don't get it. Whats the point? Why do you want me to live?

I don't feel anything really. Don't want to live anymore. Please DM me any resources, I can tolerate a bit of pain. I wish I wasn't such a coward.

"Life is nothing but an unwanted middle, between two perfectly good nothings."

All the problems, worries, pain, suffering, grief, longing, abuse, neglect, harm. Everything in your past, and in our coming future... are only a feature of being alive. A dead person can' feel or experiences any of that. Being dead is the ultimate equalizer. Its the inevitable and permanent cleansing of our slate which we are rushing towards regardless of our conscious choices.

People say that you have so much to live for! And mention all the positive things you can experience, like the "rare unpredictable moments of genuine connection!" Like anything is granted in this reality other that suffering, pain and anguish.

You can't just pull a chain, and have everything you want. And even if you get it, doesn't mean that if any of that would fill you up. Nothing good is entitled to anybody... a person can live in hope of things working out, work incessantly in making their dreams come true, and there is no lever in the universe that would grant you your desired fate and life.

Then why do we give the ultimate ownership of our own lives to other people? To the hopes of a stupid constructed ideal of love and curiosity?

We keep people alive, let them suffer, drugged out, on the streets, kick them out of their house, mock for living terribly, punched, abused, berated... and if they kill themselves, somehow their psychological health isn't right.

They aren't thinking straight, they need to be locked up, stuffed with more drugs, and then sent back out to just for them go back on the streets again. If you agree with me that there is no guarantee in life, then how can you ask them to keep struggling? It's their live if they want to die, let them die? They are going to die anyway.

Is anyone obligated to their help? Is anyone who walks across them on the streets obligated to shelter and care for them? No. Nobody cares. Nobody is entitled to care about you. You are born alone, and will die alone.

The world just exists, and most of our morality is just post-hoc justification of our self and ego... nothing more. There isn't an order to reality... not at all. Many kids die malnourished at 13, while many criminals die at 90 with generational wealth. Most of the world is built on suffering of the many, and enrichment of the few.

And this isn't new, that can be fixed with strife and rigor... its the default state of the world, people just get more and more competent at hiding it better. So don't tell me why its worth living... in this glitch of an existence, in this rotten, rotten world ruled by monkeys. Monkeys who think they are children of god... a god they created because they couldn't tolerate being animals themselves.

I used to be normal, like other people. I used to be afraid of death, afraid of being harmed, afraid of being abandoned, misused and taken for granted. I thought if I could only do this, or only do that... then somehow things would work out... that somehow universe would listen to my calls. It didn't, because it doesn't. There is no ultimate arbiter counting all our self-constructed sins. It's indifferent to everyone including me.

Why can't I die? Why is it such a big deal? Why should I suffer through this? I am not saying everyone should die, or dying early is good, or death is preferable to life. Its just that death, is death... cessation of experience. Its the ultimate gift which erases our consciousness permanently. Its a black, blank slate of void Nothing, nothing at all.

If you really think life is good, I am not asking you to die or kill yourself... I doubt you would be persuaded by me anyway. You can live, and enjoy your life. The problem is when you project your experience onto me and others.

Nobody asked to be alive.

Why? Why? Why?

What the fuck is wrong with not living? Why force me to live through this meaningless charade and blame me at every second for doing it wrong?

Why? Why? Why?

I hate the people around my for abandoning me at my lowest. I hate the world for moving on without me. I even hate my parents for taking care of me.

Every new thing I look at in this world, I don't get it, and I don't feel a part of it. I feel like I was stabbed in the back, immobilized for half a decade, and somehow have to come to terms with it and adapt to all the changes.

I can't become normal again. I am miserable, and awful. Even if I smile and act normal, I just about hate ever single thing.

I am turning into a misanthrope and want everything to burn to dust. I don't feel part of it, and don't want it to exist otherwise.

I want to die. I just want to die and not deal with any of this anymore.

Every time I look at my parents face, I am reminded that I am the disappointment they tried everything in their will for me not to be.

And just one illness, one hospitalization, one suicide attempt, turned everything lopsided. I don't wanna live anymore. The people who left me in this state, probably already rationalized my death in someway.

My parents aren't rich, but don't need money, especially not if I am not around. Just a burden and a resource drain.

I wanna leave.