u/MACAIRODON

Im very very new to these concepts of numerologyand alchemy. Ok so yesterday i saw posts about 10 10 10 (10th october 2026) and how its some portal to possibky manifest change. I genuinely wanted to know how this works, like what if im trying to change but make an old mistake again today will this ruin the alchemical process?

Does the same concept apply for your birthday or the first day of the year. Like if you're trying to quit porn and become more magnetic and havent watched it since your birthday or the start of the new year but then you relapse, will this ruin everything. How important are certain dates as portals to actually bring about manisfestation and change?

I did relapse and im feeling quite shit about it, especially because i did it on this day which 10 10 10, which makes me think i wasted the portal effects. And i dont feel like waiting for the next portal. Im just fearing I'll lose my magnetism or divine help.

Or do i just have to abstain from porn for a while first? Thoughts???

The last time I had watched porn before yesterday was back in august, a few days before my birthday which is on the 30th. For a month I had this feeling of idk like I left porn back in the time when i was 22 and was feeling good knowing I havent watched it in my current age, till yesterday when I relapsed and now im feeling shit about it. Its not just regular guilt, its worse feeling that I watched it again even though I had not done it since before my birthday.

Im curious to know what you all think of these feelings. Im very very new to concepts of alchemy and magics. I know porn might be bad for me physically. But I really wanna know if these thoughts are related to alchemy somehow or are they just mental problems and overthinking whatnot?

I genuinely want to discuss about this topic. I would love if you all could give some input.

(Edit: I forgot to add, i really have felt a change in the flow state i was feeling or the overall energy I had before I had watched porn. Right now im feeling really perfectionistic about all this and trying to get my flow state back but unable to. Im worried if all this will have a negative impact on my life alchemically.)

(Edit 2: OMG! Starting to realize this sub might not be for spiritual alchemy. Im seeing way too many posts having flasks and brewing stuff.)

My sinuses got swollen after heavy straining from excessive sexual activity. So i took just one puff of xynocine (xylometazoline) not knowing how idiotic that is. Ens symptoms like getting too much air while still feeling suffocated and unfulfilled, inflammation (especially under AC), constant fight/flight and Erectile dysfunction aswell. I have never got any nasal surgery. My nose has had been deviated a bit to my right since childhood i feel like which is i feel more emptiness in my left nostril. Could taking just puff of that nasal spray really cause ens-type?

(Note: I have never had any turbinate reduction or any nasal surgery)

A month ago i developed some conjestion in the throat altering my voice and hindering me from hitting some notes when singing (this was either from stress at the time), along with some conjestion in the nose (no much of a biggie at that time, could still get a bit of fullfilling breath). So at first i went to a gen-phy who didnt get why my throat would be blocked but saw nasal polyps and prescribed me xynocine nasal spray (xylometazoline).

Like an idiot i only took ONE puff of the spray and within the first 15 minutes i started feeling my airways TOO open and dry and got erectile dysfunction (i have an active lifestyle and got morning wood just that morning, so getting ED out of nowhere like this was shocking). The next 2 days felt like i wasnt even fully conscious like im stuck in a bad dream with constant fight/flight mode and couldnt sleep for more than 2 hours before i got up with a racing heart, breathlessness, stress flowing throughout my body and tummyache. Even the dreams i was seeing felt like being trapped in a constant fever dream. I didnt use the spray again.

Third day i went to an ENT who told me my turbinates are swollen and have developed an allergy. He gave me an anti-allergy med and a streoid nasal spray (avamys). After a week my sleep is a bit better but the too open sensation in the nasal is still the same and havent seen much improvement in erectile function. What is happening? This cant be ENS because i never had a turbinate or septum surgery. Could taking one puff of xylometazoline really trigger ens-like symptoms. Is this something related to the nerve endings of my turbinates. And how on earth the Erectile dysfunction immediately after the spray, are the sinus and erectile functions connected? As of now i can only get a fullfilling breath if i pinch my nostrils upward (making a face which creates a crease on my nosebridge, kinda like smirking), or if i put a tissue in my nose or anything to create pressure.

What should i consider as of now, a Nitric oxide spray? Ive already tried norsaline drops which werent that effective. Should i try lemma minor 200 as per suggestion of a homeopathic doctor? Should i keep taking the steroid spray?

I had been celibate for 6 months, my aura was shining, I was charming, ambitious and was slowly losing my fears and insecurities. Then I relapsed and gooned so badly recently, around 8 times in one day (No Porn).

Since then I cant even breathe fully, my throat feels like its blocked. The central part of my forehead feels like its paralyzed from the inside and I have trouble speaking and staying focused in a convo and I have had alot of trouble not saying unfunny, creepy shit to women. My left shoulders and hips are tight also slightly internally rotated and im sure I am standing 2 inches below my actual height. I cant fully feel my belly during breathing and have been having constipation issues.

I cant even feel my penis as well. All of this is affecting my face, hair and how people percieve me.

Its only been 5 days since i jerked off 8 times in a day. Can someone please tell me how long will these problems take to go away?

I had been celibate since january and started seeing major improvements in my social interactions until in june i watched porn (which mightve been a symptom of shame i accumulated in a toxic relationship). The porn left me drained me for a month despite not having watched it or even masturbating again until I had started edging the past week (no porn) and i felt alot more energetic and magnetic. But today i slipped and ejaculated, tried edging again but it just resulted in me ejaculating twice more. Now i feel like the anxious patterns are coming back from the time i had just watched porn. I feel like i wont be confident unless i wait a week and then edge. Should i put a pause on meeting women?