u/MChienne

Hi all! Hoping this is a good sub to come to for my predicament.

I’m going to be a bridesmaid in a friend’s wedding in Palm Springs this fall. The wedding is outdoors and will take place early evening. I expect the weather will be around 95-100 degrees.

As I am a bridesmaid following a very specific dress code, I had limited dress options available. Long story short…I’ve ended up with a floor-length polyester dress. I selected a backless style with a low neckline to reduce the amount of fabric actually touching my body, but it is tight around the midsection.

I’m going to see if my tailor can add a leg slit to help with air flow and will accessorize with a VERY chic hand fan, but would love some more advice/strategies to help power through this. I’m looking into merino wool underwear - would it be helpful to get a super high-rise cut to create a layer of separation between my body and the dress, or would that just add more heat? Would it help absorb sweat and avoid sweating through the dress?

Fortunately, this is a non religious ceremony and both grooms will be in full suits, so hopefully it flies by quickly! 😅. Help!!!

As the merger runs into more and more road blocks, I’m debating whether I should sell my shares or not. It’s currently a decent price and I have made significant gains. What are y’all doing?

Like many others, I’ve noticed a huge uptick in bot activity in this sub. I find this disturbing in a sub where people are frequently seeking sensitive advice related to their health and mental well-being. Plastic surgery is a sensitive topic and it is not helpful for robots to be commenting giving people useless advice or encouraging people to get surgery that they may or may not benefit from. I don’t know what these bots have to gain from this at all, either. It’s really creepy.

This sub is really lightly moderated, which is likely why it’s been targeted, so stay vigilant. Some common traits I’ve noticed from the bots in this sub below. Note that one of these traits might not be indicative of an account being a bot, but having multiple of them could be a red flag:

- Default randomized username
- Default randomized avatar
- Account age of two weeks or less
- No post history, only comments
- Active in r/TattooRemoval, r/30PlusSkincare, r/RevisionRhinoplasty, r/AmIOverreacting, r/CosmeticSurgery, and occasionally, strangely enough, r/Rottweilers
- Comments are typically just re-wording existing comments in the thread.
- AI “voice” - overuse of idioms, run-on sentences, overuse of the word “honestly,” typical overly friendly/professional AI tone
- Occasionally have seen bots respond to comments as though they are OP (i.e. thanking someone for a compliment)

I’ve been pointing these out when I have come across them and haven’t been wrong yet. Stay safe out there! ✌️

Hi all!

I am getting married in October and my fiancée and I were looking for a lesbian cover of Elvis Presley’s Can’t Help Falling in Love for our first dance. The lyrics of the song have always felt really queer to us, especially given our religious trauma (“would it be a sin?”), and finding a lesbian cover of it would feel especially meaningful for our wedding.

We found a clip of Chappell Roan covering it in 2021 and fell in love! Her interpretation of the song is so beautiful and unique. It’s exactly what we’re looking for. Unfortunately, the only clips I can find are this one from Instagram (which is a bit short for a first dance) and some live sound checks (which are poor audio quality from audience phones).

Does anyone know of any other LGBT artists who have published a cover of this song? Thank you in advance!!!

Hi all!

I am getting married in October and my fiancée and I were looking for a lesbian cover of Elvis Presley’s Can’t Help Falling in Love for our first dance. The lyrics of the song have always felt really queer to us, especially given our religious trauma (“would it be a sin?”), and finding a lesbian cover of it would feel especially meaningful.

Well, imagine our surprise when we found that our FAVORITE singing lesbian had covered it in 2021, and did so BEAUTIFULLY! Her interpretation of the song is so beautiful and unique. It’s exactly what we’re looking for.

Unfortunately, the only clips I can find are this one (which is a bit short for a first dance) and some live sound checks (which are poor audio quality from audience phones). We also would prefer to support Chappell and buy an MP3 vs. ripping audio from a video.

Do any OG early-Chappell fans know if she ever did a longer recording of this cover? I did some digging and wasn’t able to find anything, but thought I’d consult the community in case there was one buried somewhere that I’m missing.

Thank you!!!

Hi all,

I’m struggling to find dress options that are sufficiently formal for a friend’s outdoor wedding in Palm Springs in September. The dress code is “resort formal” and we are encouraged to go all-out and dress in over-the-top glamorous outfits. Normally I’d find this to be a really fun challenge, except that average high temps at that time of year are over 100 degrees.

As an added element, this is a gay couple and they’re encouraging women to wear white!

I know that natural fibers are the way to go and to stay away from polyester, which really limits options as far as budget goes. I’ve seen mixed opinions on whether Viscose is good for hot weather. Same with silk. I love linen and cotton but they feel too casual for a “formal” wedding. Help!

What are some good shops to look at for formalwear using natural, breathable materials that won’t break the bank?

Context:

I frequently travel for business - average around 30 flights per year. I do a lot of super long-haul business class travel with multiple trips to Australia and the Middle East every year, plus recently a few Europe trips, which is a great way to rake in the points and achieve status.

Per company policy I fly Business for long hauls and Economy for domestic.

Based in LAX.

Enjoy personal travel and award redemptions basically anywhere. I love to travel and am happy to redeem rewards in both Europe and Asia, so no bias there. I travel with my fiancée. No kids.

The dilemma:

I have historically been loyal to Alaska/Atmos/OneWorld, with Delta/SkyTeam as my backup program. I recently stockpiled a ton of Atmos points and used them to book my honeymoon, so I have the opportunity to restart from scratch.

I know that Delta has a lower value per point and I find their redemptions very frustrating to track. However, the hard product, particularly for domestic economy flights, is so much nicer than American (my status is with Alaska, but often American offers more options). I also notice that my coworkers with Delta status get upgraded much more often than I do, so I’m wondering if it is worth the improved quality of life.

Pros for OneWorld: Prefer Qatar airways for ME flights. Better value for points. Better options for Australia travel via Qantas (usually go once per year). Historic loyalty/emotional ties. Great Asia redemptions w/ Europe options rapidly gaining.

Pros for SkyTeam: Better domestic economy hard product. Better airline options for Europe (I’m not a fan of British Airways). Perceived to be better for upgrades. More domestic options on Delta vs. Alaska, where I have historically banked my points. Better online interface.

Cons for OneWorld: Fewer Alaska Airlines flight options. Domestic American Airlines flights are lesser hard product than Delta. Atmos has nerfed international partner mileage earning (they’ve promised to improve it again sometime this year but have yet to).

Cons for SkyTeam: Much worse value per point. Frustrating redemptions/awards. I find the MQD system confusing (and it feels a little unfair/slower than Atmos, but that might be my perception/lack of status). Etihad flights to Middle East are less convenient than my usual go-to Qatar flight.

One last point:

I could probably achieve some status with both of them this year. With the trips I currently have booked, I should be able to clear Delta Silver Medallion and Atmos Gold, but wondering if it’s best to put all my eggs in one basket instead.

Any points I’ve missed? Sorry for the novel!

Hi all! My partner and I are getting married in LA in October and are looking for a HMUA with experience working with Butch women/queer couples in general.

My partner never wears makeup at all but wants to look nice and put together (but like herself!) for our wedding - just basic complexion makeup to even out skin tone, hide blemishes, etc. I’ve reached out to Bobbie Pins & Blush and Melissa Bedi, but they’re the only two I’ve found so far that have couples that look like us in their portfolio 🫠. Does anyone have any recommendations?

Hi all,

I have a bunch of shares I purchased via my company’s Employee Stock Purchase Plan at a 15% discount.

The company is set to be acquired. If and when the merger closes, all shares will be automatically sold for cash at a set price.

The stock price is currently about 15% below the agreed-upon sale price. Would it be smart risk management to cash out all my long-term holdings now and put them in SPAXX? I will be realizing gains whether I sell now or later and that 15% difference ultimately amounts to about $2-3k.

I don’t have a strong cash emergency fund built out outside of these investments and I’m anxious about the deal falling through and my nest egg taking a nose dive.

Aware of the tax implications (already asked about it in a separate thread) and will plan accordingly.

Thank you!

Hi all,

I own a bunch of company shares purchased at a discount via the Employee Stock Purchase Plan. The company is being acquired soon, meaning my shares will automatically be sold at the set cash price as soon as the deal closes.

I’m set to earn around $20k in capital gains on these shares. The majority are long-term, but a small portion will be taxed as short term capital gains (depending on when the deal closes).

I have calculated the anticipated tax burden for the sale in a number of different scenarios (timing of the sale, if I cash out early at a lower price, etc). Does it make sense to just set that amount from the sale aside in a separate “bucket” so I can just pay it from there next April? Is there something else I should consider doing? I don’t really have anything I can sell at a loss to balance it out at the moment.

Additional info:

Gross income: $102k base, $45k (ish) bonus
Roth IRA $100 (just opened it last week)
HSA $11.5k
401k $94k
Professionally-managed brokerage $59k
HYSA $3k

I am aware I need a liquid emergency fund. This is the plan for the stock sale proceeds.

Let me know if I should provide more specific info, and my apologies if I got any of this verbiage wrong (very likely!).

Thank you!

Day 2 PO and I can’t believe I have to wear this thing for a week! It’s causing me substantially more pain and discomfort than the surgery itself. My poor ears!

My surgeon gave me one of the ace bandage style wraps that goes over the ears. The pressure on my ears is awful. I’ve put some extra chunks of lipo foam above my ears to relieve the pressure which helps a little. It’s also making me clench my jaw in a way that causes discomfort and wakes me up. I’m ordering a mouth guard to mitigate.

I also bought one of the face wraps from Amazon that everyone in here has recommended. It has ear holes, but the head straps wants to slide forward on my face, meaning that it just tugs on my ears from the back instead of pushing them down. A lose-lose! I also feel that the compression isn’t as high or as even as the ace bandage from my surgeon.

This is mainly just a rant post, but also open to more recommendations if anyone has them! I wear glasses which only makes the ear pain worse. Would love to hear from others about tips and tricks that have worked for them.