u/MarkOnKarma

I feel a strong connection to many of the lyrics Jeff wrote throughout his career, such as *The Sky is a landfill, Grace, Nightmare by the sea, Forget Her, Eternal life, So Real, Everybody Here Wants You, Vancouver, Last Goodbye, Mojo Pin.*

I’ve always thought of Jeff Buckley as a very sensitive person—someone capable of pouring his emotions and feelings into his music—and as the exact antithesis of the attitudes typical of hair metal machismo, which I never liked. I find the same in Chris Cornell lyrics, or Dolores O'Riordan or The Smiths.

I, too, have had to deal with mental health issues—and still do—but activities like psychotherapy, jogging, mountain biking, don't drink, don't smoke (quit many years ago) try to eat healthy, reading, music, writing, and graphic design have been a huge help to me and \*DELETE SOCIAL MEDIA.\*

Furthermore, as a man, I’ve always struggled to navigate my own sensitivity and vulnerability in this society; I’ve always loathed the macho rhetoric of "toughening up," suppressing emotions, or the idea that "women find men with little money unattractive, so get rich and hit the gym," manipulate women and associate masculinity with money, as well as the notion that being harmless equates to being weak or call people losers, if they live with parents after 30s or 40s for many reasons. And stigmatize men who struggle with find relathionships is so judging and heartless to me. And tell you that if you are single because you don't want a toxic relationship after being hurt so bad is wrong. And always had this sense of being a failure for that.

the toxic positivity, grind shit, invalidations,ego, stigma ecc ecc

There is people like Scott Galloway or Jordan Peterson,or Joe Rogan and other podcasts of self help world that i really don't like it. Their ideas on life, dating, relathionships or how a man should be, i really disagree with them. Not like what they shared.

It’s a frustrating situation because there’s a certain stigma surrounding this, even though a man can possess so many other qualities like listening, empathy, deepness, vulnerability, ask for help, being loyal, trustworthy, honest and also cut people out if they hurt you and respond if they treat bad.

I am kind of sensitive and fragile INFJ with some struggles with mental health and kind of introvert but like also going out but also to stay alone. I get overstimulated with situations and big crowds and superficial things and when good people get hurt, I really get pissed off and I feel anger when I feel injustices toward people.

And of course is struggle with avoidance and loneliness like not everyone can really understand my internal world.

Have you also faced similar struggles, and did Jeff music, helped you manage your mental health issues?

I add also of my fav bands like Cranberries, Radiohead, Elliott Smith, Soundgarden, Nirvana, AIC, STP, Linkin Park, Nick Drake, Opeth, Porcupine Tree, Neil Young, Rush, Alanis, The Smiths, Matthew Good, Faith no More,NIN, Guano Apes, RHCP and JF stuff, Audioslave, also heavy stuff, trip hop, alternative , some metal, some acoustic folkish, grunge, some prog rock, some good pop with substance, New Wave/post punk....

I’m a man in his 30s who considers himself both sensitive and fragile; I have ADHD and avoidant personality disorder, and for much of my life, I’ve struggled with low-grade depression.

Throughout my life, I’ve always suffered from the feeling that I wasn't "enough," because I was always seen as the guy who was too sensitive, too quiet, or not tough, manly, or virile enough or incapable of being, let's say, an "asshole." Of course, I don't consider myself perfect I’ve made my share of small mistakes, but I admit that the model society presents of how men should be has always made me feel terrible.

And the aspect that i always hated in music was the Pimp aspect in some lyrics. There is difference between write about someone who hurt you and beind pissed and down, and share that with intensitiy than talk about parties, get laid, have more women and do drugs.

Sure, I’m a funny person; I crack jokes, talk nonsense, and use irony, sarcasm, and sometimes cynicism. I feel anger and frustration just like anyone else, but I’ve never acted like an "alpha male" or a piece of shit around people. I’ve always had a sensitive and fragile personality.

And these podcasters who tell us how "men should be". They talk about chaos as feminine and order as masculine; they talk about hierarchies and not being a loser by living at home with your family; they say our worth depends on how much is in our wallets and our ability to provide resources for women, and that we have to be strong. They claim a docile man is a weak man, and that you should possess great power but choose to "control" it.

This has always made me feel like I couldn't measure up and like I wasn't worth shit. Between my ADHD, my sensitivity and INFJ neurodivergence, and the fact that I’ve never earned a high salary, I’ve always struggled to handle intense emotions, stress, anxiety, burnout—and crowds, especially. I think I’ve been single for most of my life; I experienced true love once, but unfortunately, it didn't end well.

Now, i have serious trust issues so much so that I’m afraid to put myself out there with someone new, partly because I live with my parents, which sometimes makes me feel ashamed. I’ve lived alone and cohabited before, so I know what it’s like, but after a mental breakdown, i moved back in with my parents and am trying to find a path I had lost even though it isn't easy.

I admit I have a strong need to be alone, as I crave silence and calm, but sometimes when I go out and see everyone else in relationships, I feel a bit alienated. I also often struggle to connect with men due to various negative experiences, including betrayals by friends and even having a girlfriend taken away from me. I’ve hit rock bottom many times, but fortunately, I’m in therapy.

I’m doing better now: I’m in psychotherapy, exercising, writing, and looking for a training course. Every now and then, I go out—either alone or with the two long-distance friends I have—and I listen to bands like Radiohead, Matthew Good, Soundgarden, Nick Drake, Porcupine Tree, Nirvana, Opeth, AIC, The Cranberries, and Neil Young. DO YOU LIKE ANY OF THIS MUSIC?

And obviously, DELETING SOCIAL MEDIA was really good for me!

Have any of you experienced this feeling of alienation? Do you ever find yourselves feeling lonely even when surrounded by people?

Hi guys, I don't want to sound like an "old-school" person or someone who complains about the modern era, but on the one hand, I'm happy that kids and many young people have rediscovered Nick Drake because it's important to know good music. On the other hand, I don't like it when I see a major artist's music go "viral" on social media in a 15-second reel, maybe under an ad or a sponsor or as an influencer. I wrote that also in Jeff Buckley community

I don't know, I'm very distant from that world, I don't have social media and maybe I'm stuck with the old-school mentality. I definitely use YouTube music, I've collected CDs all my life and sometimes I miss the old-school way of enjoying music. When you sat in your room with your stereo and lost yourself in the vulnerability of those music. I like Cranberries, Nick Drake, Chris Cornell and SG, Linkin Park, Elliott Smith, Jeff B, AIC, STP, John Frusciante and RHCP, Matthew Good, Neil Young, David Wiffen (a canadian Nick Drake) italian old school music, Tears For Fears, Depeche Mode, The Smiths, and many other also heavy alternative metal stuff, trip hop , experimental electronic music (that is more deep and of substance) and pop music with substance

I don't like social media, they are full of toxicity, self help gurus, life coaches, love coaches, guru of masculinity that use rethotic tactics to make us feel worse, if we are more sensitive men and fragile, and say "hey fragility is wrong, you had to be tough, steong, stoics, masculine, be economically viable for women, because women find men with less money less attractive" or say that men are pussies for being more emotional, fragile or sensitive. People like Jordan Peterson or Scott Galloway shared ideas that i really disagree with, because they want to bring back the old machismo patterns like pay for everything for women and recognize the value in a man in money, call you a loser if you live with your parents in your 30s, and i honestly tell you that some months ago i struggled with bad thoughts about myself, after listen this things and thinked about finish my life, for not being successful or always strong or the pressure for "be a man".

But men get hurt, struggle with mental health too, had depression, and this culture demonize therapy. I experienced it exoecislly after a break up who had destroyed my ability to trust people. All western culture, had always demonize suffering and fragility consider a moral failure and a bad thing.

Especially after reading books of Buying Chul Han.

Like we are not hunan beings and I noticed when I was on social media that this people want us to be robots without feelings. But it's not human, humans need to experience also pain and suffering.

I really get pissed off when good people are being hurt by bad people. And I saw especially through social media how people can really hurt you. Assholes was always here , but with social media they had been amplified

But hey, Nick Drake was the opposite of that. He never said to repress emotions, like anger, sadness of depression. I was saw on IG and then I was on it that there are profiles that say that anger is a bad thing, a poison for soul. But we as human beings need to feel it, understand it, and use it in healthy ways, because it is not toxic at all. If you use it to defend yourself, or change a situation or cut a person who hurts you, there is nothing wrong with that.

Do the music of Nick had made you feel better on this overstimulated world?

In winter and spring I was constantly walk through the countryside with fog.. i had leaved a job that had destroy me and got burnout and i had come back to my family in my 30s after a bad relathionship with a woman that i loved, but had destroy me and she leaved me. So I had cut every interaction and go away.

I had CONSUMED XO and Either/Or and this music had helped me so much to think and try to cope the pain that I was felt. Also Cranberries, Jeff Buckley, Chris Cornell and SG, Nick Drake, Nirvana, Tears For Fears, The Smiths , AIC,STP, Opeth, Silverchair, Matthew Good, Aphex Twins Radiohead, Linkin Park,RHCP (john frusciante in specific)...I also listen heavy stuff with distorted guitars and metal / alternative/ alt. Hip-hop / , good old pop music, I like music with substance not superficial stuff that talk about sex, being a bad boy or a bad girl, alcohol, parties, money and being a pimp. I fuckin hate that.

In this times I was using Instagram a lot but I start to feel like , I don't belong here in this world and start having bad thoughts especially because I am a man and struggle with ADHD , avoidant disorder and some times low grade depression. I am an INFJ , sensitive a lil bit fragile, comedian, sarcastic, funny but also melanchonic and can be sometimes cynical and became kind of a loner.

I feel very distant from social media because I find much of it toxic and full of self-help gurus, ragebait, political influencers, and people promoting a narrow, hyper-masculine idea of success that had put me in a bad thoughts and all this self help people who use victim blaming for made you feel like you are never enough.

I don't use social media anymore and fuckin delete them.

I dislike the idea that men must always be strong, stoic, rich, emotionally invulnerable, and economically valuable to women. Being sensitive, struggling financially, being alone, living with your parents, or having mental-health problems does not make someone a loser or a failure.

But there is people like Scott Galloway, Jordan Peterson, maybe others in this field that spread things that had made me feel so bad about myself and ask if I need to be in this world or not. Like hey, "women find men with less money, less attractive, you had to became rich" "young men are in troubles""if they are alone they became weak and dangerous" oooh fuck ..really? And what is their recipe?

"Being a traditional masculine man, pay everything for women, being stoic, hang out with people more "successful" than you" "drink more" "don't be sensitive" , calling you a loser for living with your family in your 30s, shame you because you are "lazy" or made you feel guilty for not being "successful".

Fuck , i completely disagree and the worst is, that your value depends on money and the capacity of pay for your woman. This is totally awful and horrible.

And I think that this retorics about young men inInstead of helping, it creates even more frustration and hatred among young men and between men and women.

And this narrative that men alone are dangerous is totally a bullshit. I like being alone. I go out in mountain bike, reading books, write, do graphics, listen music,cook,clean I also go out alone, yeah sometimes you want to have some friends and trust them, I have only one.

But I never liked the big crowds and big groups of people.

I'm a sensitive man who has had painful experiences in relationships, and those experiences affected my ability to trust people.

I'm not an incel or a woman-hater: I simply recognize that both men and women can hurt each other, and that men can also experience abuse, betrayal, depression, loneliness, and emotional pain.

What bothers me most is how modern culture often treats suffering and vulnerability as personal failures, especially for men, while discouraging therapy and asking for help. I've experienced how damaging this mentality can be myself.

I believe human beings aren't machines. We need emotions, relationships, compassion, and sometimes help. Sensitivity and vulnerability are not weaknesses, and someone's worth shouldn't depend on money, status, masculinity, or being at the top of some hierarchy.

And of course tell to us to repress emotions is one of the most dangerous things to say to someone , especially the anger.

Now is fashion being stoic and say that anger is a poison that you had to repress and not feel. We are human beings and we feel all emotions. There is healthy anger that made you want boundaries, that protect you from aggression and assholes and sometimes made you stand up for yourself. And made you give strength for start again. But of course you had to deal with anger and not let that consume you for sure.

And therapy is good for that.

However I want only say that Elliott's music had made me felt not alone, was also for you?? Thx you

I don't know, I'm very distant from that world, I don't have social media and maybe I'm stuck with the old-school mentality.

Someone here who listen music like: Soundgarden, Jeff Buckley, Neil Young, Radiohead, Elliot Smith, Nirvana, Nick Drake,John Frusciante (also RHCP) Smiths, Tears For Fears, Matthew Good, Crash Test Dummies, Apex Twin, REM, AIC, Linkin Park, and many other music also heavy stuff

I don't like social media, they are full of toxicity, self help gurus, life coaches, political influencers, ragebaits, love coaches, guru of masculinity that use tactics to make us feel worse if we are more sensitive men and fragile, and say "hey fragility is wrong, you had to be tough, strong, stoic, masculine, be economically viable for women, because women find men with less money less attractive" and if you live with your parents at 35 you are a "total loser". And say that women select men for their economically viability to me is not really a good take to say especially when you struggle.

And if you are not rich it's "your fault". All this people scare me and that had so much visibility.

People like Jordan Peterson or Scott Galloway or other guru of self help, that i don't follow and i don't like, but i notice that also in 2026 there is this mentality, to condemn men if they are alone or sad or judge , if they don't act like tough,or having much money, being always strong, reduce his function only to be a "provider" without know that also men had feelings and struggle and if we had some mental health issues we are not enough. Like there is something wrong with you if you are not on the "top of the hiarchies" and that if you are not rich and happy it's your fault. totally bullshit. And the worst is that this people made this issues as "political"

THIS IS A TOTALLY SHAME and for months after I leaved a job I felt that way and thinked that I need to kill myself. Fortunate I do therapy, go out in mountain bike , jogging, reading, listen to music, do graphic ecc ecc

What I hate about that is this people also demonize the suffering and want us to made feel more worst. And the impact on people who struggle to have money is so high. Like all women want men for money and for being providers without see also the other things. This is such bullshit. And the fact that also men have emotions, suffer and have their feelings is real

I am kind of sensitive man neurodivergent (ADHD) and struggle with avoidant disorder and I had struggled with low grade depression.

But men get hurt, struggle with mental health too, had depression, and this culture demonize therapy. I experienced it especially after a break up, who had destroyed my ability to trust people.

All western culture, had always demonized suffering and fragility consider a moral failure and a bad thing especially to ask for help (especially men).

Especially after reading books of Buying Chul Han. Like we are not human beings and I noticed when I was on social media that this people want us to be robots without feelings. But it's not human, humans need to experience also pain and suffering.

However, do you had felt that way this way sometimes?

Bleach and In Utero are the albums that helped me a lot through all my bad thoughts about myself.

I really get pissed off when good people are being hurt by bad people. And I saw especially through social media how people can really hurt you. Assholes was always here , but with social media they had been amplified

I don't know, I'm very distant from that world, I don't have social media and maybe I'm stuck with the old-school mentality. I definitely use YouTube music, I've collected CDs all my life and sometimes I miss the old-school way of enjoying music. I'm kind of stuck between 1993 - 2003

However in the darkest moments, Cranberries is like my shoulder to cry and feel like we are not alone!! Do you had felt this way?

I grew up with this band , i start "listening" them in 1995 when they were in a show in my country and i always loved them. Them, Soundgarden, Jeff Buckley, Neil Young, Radiohead, Elliot Smith, Nirvana, Nick Drake,John Frusciante (also RHCP) Smiths, Tears For Fears, Matthew Good, Crash Test Dummies, Apex Twin, REM, AIC, Linkin Park, and many other music also heavy stuff

I have my playlist that purify my mind : Wake Up And Smell the Coffee, Loud And Clear, Wake Me When it's Over, Empty, Salvation, Electric Blue, Sunday, Promises, Dying Inside, Disappointed, I Still Do, Zombie, Wanted, How, Ridicous Thoughts, Not Sorry, Hollywood, Just My Immagination, Copycat,

I don't like social media, they are full of toxicity, self help gurus, life coaches, political influencers, ragebaits, love coaches, guru of masculinity that use tactics to make us feel worse if we are more sensitive men and fragile, and say "hey fragility is wrong, you had to be tough, strong, stoics, masculine, be economically viable for women, because women find men with less money less attractive" and if you live with your parents at 35 you are a "total loser". people like Jordan Peterson or Scott Galloway or other guru of self help that i don't follow and i don't like, but i notice that also in 2026 there is this mentality to condemn men if they are alone or sad or judge if they don't act like tough,or having much money, strong, reduce his function only to be a "provider" without know that also men had feelings and struggle and if we had some mental health issues we are not enough. But not only for men, also for women.

I am kind of sensitive man neurodivergent (ADHD) and avoidant disorder

But men get hurt, struggle with mental health too, had depression, and this culture demonize therapy. I experienced it expecially after a break up who had destroyed my ability to trust people. All western culture, had always demonize suffering and fragility consider a moral failure and a bad thing especially to ask for help.

Especially after reading books of Buying Chul Han. Like we are not human beings and I noticed when I was on social media that this people want us to be robots without feelings. But it's not human, humans need to experience also pain and suffering.

However, do you had felt that way this way sometimes? Cranberries music had helped through the pain??

I really get pissed off when good people are being hurt by bad people. And I saw especially through social media how people can really hurt you. Assholes was always here , but with social media they had been amplified

Dolores O'Riordan was the opposite of that. He never said to repress emotions, like anger, sadness of depression. I was saw on IG and then I was on it that there are profiles that say that anger is a bad thing, a poison for soul. But we as human beings need to feel it, understand it, and use it in healthy ways, because it is not toxic at all. If you use it to defend yourself, or change a situation or cut a person who hurts you, there is nothing wrong with that. I mean, if you listen songs like Promises, Dying Inside, Wake Up and Smell the Coffee, or Electric blue.

And i tell that in the most darkest moments their music to me is kind of medicine. Is for you????

Hi guys,i am not on social media , only this and YouTube, but I wanna say that in my mental health issues like ADHD, avoidant disorder and low grade depression, but I am kind of feel good now because I do mountain biking and jogging and move, I live with my parents (I had 35) and try to feel better. I find out that his music is so special because after the instrumental parts, the lyrics of him are so fragile and sensitive and people can really find themselves inside this.

For me the album "From The Sounds Inside" and "Shadows Collide With People" are something cathartic. A betrayal by friends or loved one, bullying, feelings of emptiness, loneliness, a loss, desperation, frustration, feeling like never enough,love, friendships I don't know but to me is kind of medicine.

And he is so deep and vulnerable in that. Well, I mean, in this age and this culture that hates fragility, vulnerability and stops for asking for help, full of guru , life coaches, love coaches, guru of masculinity, pseudoscientific people that say that men need always to be strong, stoic, suppress anger and emotions, masculine, economically viable for having women and say that women find less attractive men with less money, and say don't ask for professional help for not dieting their image of tough guy(see what Jordan Peterson or Scott Galloway, Robert Greene, Jay Shetty, Mel Robbins and all this people)....without understand that men suffer like every other human beings and struggle with mental health and sometimes we had to stop and sit with pain. They bring more stigma, stereotypes, generalizations and exploit fragilities.

I am both funny, sarcastic, comic,honest, but sensitive, fragile, melancholic, angry sometimes with injustices, with manipulators, evil people, bullies, pedofiles, rapers, and bad people and bad things that happened both in personal lives and at more in society and sometimes silent. I hurt when I saw good people being hurt by bad people

I find the music of John really the opposite of that. However thx for reading and I am curious which song you have listened to and feel not alone?

Thx

Hi guys, I don't want to sound like an "old-school" person or someone who complains about the modern era, but on the one hand, I'm happy that kids and many young people have rediscovered Jeff Buckley because it's important to know good music. On the other hand, I don't like it when I see a major artist's music go "viral" on social media in a 15-second reel, maybe under an ad or a sponsor or as an influencer.

I don't know, I'm very distant from that world, I don't have social media and maybe I'm stuck with the old-school mentality. I definitely use YouTube music, I've collected CDs all my life and sometimes I miss the old-school way of enjoying music. When you sat in your room with your stereo and lost yourself in the vulnerability of those Jeff notes.

I don't like social media, they are full of toxicity, self help gurus, life coaches, love coaches, guru of masculinity that use manipulation tactics to make us feel worse if we are more sensitive men and fragile, and say "hey fragility is wrong, you had to be tough, steong, stoics, masculine, be economically viable for women, because women find men with less money less attractive" .

But men get hurt, struggle with mental health too, had depression, and this culture demonize therapy. I experienced it exoecislly after a break up who had destroyed my ability to trust people. All western culture, had always demonize suffering and fragility consider a moral failure and a bad thing.

Especially after reading books of Buying Chul Han.

Like we are not hunan beings and I noticed when I was on socisl media that this people want us to be robots without feelings. But it's not human, humans need to experience also pain and suffering.

But hey, Jeff Buckley was the opposite of that. He never said to repress emotions, like anger, sadness of depression. I was saw on IG and then I was on it that there are profiles that say that anger is a bad thibg, a poison for soul. But we as human beings need to feel it, understand it, and use it in healthy ways, because it is not toxic at all. If you use it to defend yourself, or change a situation or cut a person who hurts you, there is nothing wrong with that. I mean, if you listen Eternal Life......

I thought a lot after listening to this masterpiece where Chris tries to not always be a "recluse", and while listening to this song I decided to delete social media.

This society, along with social media, greatly glorifies appearance, being famous and extremely rich, being an asshole without ethics; there are dangerous things and I see that they are not so. Sometimes I find myself very much in what he says and for many years I have perceived an emptiness, being a highly sensitive person with ADHD and avoidant disorder and with periods of low-grade depression as a man.

This made me make the decision to delete all social media except YouTube and Reddit, because I see toxicity that has only done me harm and I realize that life is better without social media and even when I go out for a run in nature, or read, or go for a bike ride, it's much better.

I don't know if it's the same for you, but I was tired of feeling guilty after watching some toxic reels. There are too many intermediaries, influencers, constant political wars, hatred between man and women, no respect, people who don't know you and you offend, masculinity gurus like Scott Galloway or Jordan Peterson who emphasize that you have to be "economically viable" to be with women, which is totally disgusting, especially if you're fighting financially as a man and show that girls and women will care only for money and its totally toxic because it's not true, and that you have to be hyperstoic, masculine, and always confident, as if men don't have emotions and don't suffer.

And if you don't have a girlfriend or a wife in your 30s for this people and society you are a loser (but they don't know anything about psychology, emotions) and that maybe men and women are single because they had been hurt a lot in relathionships and need time alone for stay better because they had trust issues?

And all these "new religions" of self-help that want to make us feel like emotionless robots, and that showing emotions and fragility is a bad thing and not masculine, and that kindness or being gentle and honest are some kind of lost value. I'm 35, I live with my parents, and I'm trying to rebuild everything at my own pace.

I notice that forging connections and friendships with groups is difficult for me, even though I have a longtime friend with whom I have a good relationship, and obviously my family. Sometimes you want to connect more deeply to people, it's not easy. But maybe I'll find someone too. I experienced bullying , isolation, betrayal in love and friendships and of course it hurts

I often see on social media that everyone seems to be friends, that there's a connection, and I see a sometimes overly fake do-goodism, which often leads people to feel guilty for even feeling healthy anger, like when they're treated badly. These new stoics tell us that anger should be repressed because it's poisonous, but to me that's bullshit. All the Zuckerbergs, Musk's and all this people who "dictate the rules" and at the same time governments both centreright or centreleft had cut healthcare, liberalize everything and cut every services here in Europe. Western society made you feel guilty for not being successful and rich Anger is an emotion like any other; it needs to be managed, but it needs to be listened to and vented in healthy ways, and sometimes it's even the engine that allows us to defend ourselves when we're mocked, offended, humiliated, and attacked. Sorry for the long post, I'm a bit old school, I live like it's still 1995, but that's fine with me.

Have any of you fans ever felt this way? Or some people that had kind of similar experiences?

However , Soundgarden always rocks!

Maybe i am stuck in the 90s and the first 2000s but i follow the advices of keanu Reeves and Cillian Murphy because social media are extremely toxic and this is the reason why i delete everything except LinkedIn , reddit and Pinterest. Of course I use YouTube , but I try to use it on my computer, but the rest to me is soul sucking, superficial, violent, hater, and to me don't have a lot of benefits.

Too much negativity, bullying, hate, people are so stupid and assholes on there, that to me is too much. Too much gender polarizing, hate between men and women, toxic masculinity, toxic positivity, guru of masculinity who say that men are only here to provide, procreate and get economically viable for women🤮 be stoic, and macho and don't show fragility.

People are get so nervous and bad about themselves on social media. I know because I had felt the same. I prefer listen my music, without the continue interference of posts, of the opinion of fans , read my books, writing, go out on mountain biking, jogging, do graphic, see my fav movies and try to not think bad about myself for being more a sensitive and fragile man.

This summer I listened Cranberries a lot ,John Frusciante, Linkin Park, Trip Hop music, Matthew Good, Soundgarden, Neil Young, Elliott Smith, Crash Test Dummies, because their music connect with my fragile part and I put my pain on poems. I became more cynical and existentialist through life but I continue to enjoy the things that made me feel good. 30% of humans I can trust, the rest...not so much...xD I saw everything here where I live. Here they killed a homeless guy because of a 50 euro of debit with someone and people had done nothing. I became more cynical about love , but I try to stay hopeful and maybe one day I can love again.

Kids who is disrespectful that beat people on the streets and sometimes kill them for nothing , people that beat animals for nothing, a politics that is so far from local and people of middle class and people who have less money , cut universal healthcare, cut mental health services , too much insensitivity. Hey, I am a sensitive man too, I am also sarcastic, comical, cynical,good-natured but very pissed off when I see good people treated bad by stupid people. What do you think about that??

I think I've now accepted the fact that I suffer from ADHD, avoidant disorder, intestinal problems and intolerances and sometimes low-grade depression and this often leads me to reflect on how I wouldn't be able to give anything in a relationship, because I tend to be very overstimulated and if I already do a lot of things, I often tend to not be able to be calm. Then it's true that I worked a lot, 10 hours of driving a day, two different workplaces and they moved me whenever my bosses wanted and I was a professional educator in a retirement home and the work was hard, but I often say, at the moment I'm fine on my own, I've been single for 2 years, I experienced a strong sense of failure when I returned to live with my parents at 35, here the costs of living are impossible and salaries don't grow, but I've found a sort of balance. I'm trying to rebuild my life my way, but often, in terms of relationships, I don't know what I can contribute. I've often been invalidated, treated badly because I had moments of burnout, and I've been told that my suffering was meaningless compared to that of the other person, and this has hurt me deeply. And of course the comparison with others and the fact that my body is not enough exiting, because i'm thin and not so much muscular

I'm not always serious or depressed, i 'm more of a man that joke a lot, say bullshit, be ironic, sarcastic and cuss sometimes, go out to mountain biking in dirt roads, do jogging, play guitar at the same time i'm also a melanchonic, deep, sensitive and fragile human being that love to write, reading, watching films, love animals, cry, feel to much, listen nick drake, elliott smith, soundgarden, the smiths, the cranberries , nirvana, Stone Sour, Linkin Park, and maybe people had difficulties to not see me always happy and satisfacted.

I often tend to think that the other person won't respect me and will say I'm not strong enough, that I'm too insecure, that I'm not a real man, and that we can't show our suffering, etc., etc. But I want to reiterate that I've always been faithful, I've always been able to listen,to love, to be present,to be helpful etc., etc. Yes, maybe I'm not rich but that was never enough. I am too boring to live with, because i don't have always the same energy

So, I'm staying out of it, because if you can't have moments of fragility in a relationship, then it's better not to get engaged.

Do you have similar experiences?

Hi guys, i always want to say that Elliott music especially XO is kind of a medicine to me, because this music is so important for mental health and struggles. Music had saved me many times and not feel alone in some struggles. Sorry i don't have social media and i want to share that i live with avoidant disorder, low and ADHD and sometimes low grade depression and i always be kind the "lonely ,shy, melanconic but funny kid" i was bullied, i had struggles with relationships and be hurt so much and i don't have many friends. And i am a sensitive man , i like being alone and go out alone with mountain bike, reading, writing, sometimes also go out and be with some friends. I live with my parents at 35 and glad that i have my parents that help me because i leaved a toxic job,burnout and a terribile end of a relathionship. I do psychotherapy a lot and helps me, search job. So i want to say to all people who struggle to find the help and don't be ashamed. And that sometimes being alone is a good thing and can really help you to find your way (obviously with support) .

Tired of self help guru that tells that you are never enough or guru of masculinity who say that men are "this" and women are "that, or that men need to be "economically viable for women" , and always stoic, confident and strong and you had to be an arrogant (quote people like Jordan Peterson or Scott Galloway that spread this toxic traits) and tell how to resolve your problem with a reel of 15 seconds how to live life. I near felt suicidal for not respond to the "society rules" of how men "should be" and for the economic part.

To me Elliott represent the oppose of that toxic traits. I feel bad for thinking that my value depends only for how much money i made . To me is not a good thing and I think that also Elliott would agree.

Men are also human beings that suffer , that struggled , some of them are more fragile and sometimes struggle with mental health and are more sensitive and not the alpha stupid male macho.

i had deleted social media guys, the world is so much better outside without constantly news, political polarizations by the two sides and toxicity, it kill mind and free thinking, and find professional help

do you people had felt that way?

thx you

Hi guys, i always want to say that Elliott music especially XO is kind of a medicine to me, because this music is so important for mental health and struggles. Music had saved me many times and not feel alone in some struggles. Sorry i don't have social media and i want to share that i live with avoidant disorder, low and ADHD and sometimes low grade depression and i always be kind the "lonely ,shy, melanconic but funny kid" i was bullied, i had struggles with relationships and be hurt so much and i don't have many friends. And i am a sensitive man , i like being alone and go out alone with mountain bike, reading, writing, sometimes also go out and be with some friends. I live with my parents at 35 and glad that i have my parents that help me because i leaved a toxic job,burnout and a terribile end of a relathionship. I do psychotherapy a lot and helps me, search job. So i want to say to all people who struggle to find the help and don't be ashamed. And that sometimes being alone is a good thing and can really help you to find your way (obviously with support) .

Tired of self help guru that tells that you are never enough or guru of masculinity who say that men are "this" and women are "that, or that men need to be "economically viable for women" , and always stoic, confident and strong and you had to be an arrogant (quote people like Jordan Peterson or Scott Galloway that spread this toxic traits) and tell how to resolve your problem with a reel of 15 seconds how to live life. I near felt suicidal for not respond to the "society rules" of how men "should be" and for the economic part.

To me Elliott represent the oppose of that toxic traits. I feel bad for thinking that my value depends only for how much money i made . To me is not a good thing and I think that also Elliott would agree.

And I tell you that in my country wages are so low and costs of living sucks, we prefer as European countries waste money on weapons and cut spending on healthcare, jobs, welfare and for workers rights, so i don't really like both of politicians of both two sides.

Men are also human beings that suffer , that struggled , some of them are more fragile and sometimes struggle with mental health and are more sensitive and not the alpha stupid male macho.

i had deleted social media guys, the world is so much better outside without constantly news, political polarizations by the two sides and toxicity, it kill mind and free thinking, and find professional help

do you people had felt that way?

thx you

Good afternoon, everyone. I’d like to start by saying that I’ve loved Linkin Park’s music for quite a few years now—specifically since 2001. Their music continues to help me when I’m alone with my thoughts and dealing with challenges like avoidant personality disorder, ADHD, and low-grade depression; I’m also a highly sensitive person. I’ve experienced bullying, mockery, and various betrayals—both in friendships and relationships—and things like that can slowly make you feel unworthy of appreciation or see yourself as ugly when you look in the mirror.

Fortunately, I’m in therapy, and I have things that help me feel good: mountain biking, music, and reading. I’ve also deleted all my social media accounts except for YouTube, Pinterest, and LinkedIn, and for me, it’s been like a rebirth. I moved back in with my parents at 35 after some devastating failures. But getting to the point: sometimes I can’t wrap my head around how so many bullies listen to Linkin Park.

The messages in their lyrics—whether in the angrier songs or the more melodic, vulnerable, and desperate ones—often involve "regurgitating" the pain inflicted by someone who hurt us. This stirs up anger, despair, and the whole spectrum of human emotions. Yet, I just can’t reconcile these artists with bullies, macho "alpha males," or people who just want to act arrogant, show off, flaunt their wealth, and so on. Linkin Park was different from the other bands in the early 2000s, was more deep, vulnerable and emotional band in the lyrics and in the music and they always support people to ask for help.

For the record, I deleted my social media accounts precisely because they were driving me to suicidal thoughts—the constant comparisons, the dehumanization of people, the various forms of cruelty, the insensitivity, the extreme political polarization on both sides. Then there are the self-help gurus who tell you your life sucks and—in a 15-second Reel—tell you exactly what to do, trivializing psychotherapy. And all those "masculinity gurus" claiming women don't find men with little money attractive, insisting you have to be a provider and a procreator, that you need high social status to be appealing, that you must be arrogant, hyper-stoic, and incredibly selfish to be "a real man," or that living with your parents past 30 makes you a failure—they even make you feel guilty about it. They completely ignore the fact that men suffer from mental health issues, have emotions, sometimes they enjoy being alone and loneliness too and often need to seek help, all while trivializing that very help.

People like Scott Galloway and Jordan Peterson often push these ideas; for someone who has lost their job or quit due to burnout—and who often finds themselves isolated—these toxic messages are anything but healthy. Sorry for the rant, guys, but I just wanted to share this perspective with you.

Well I grew up with The Cranberries, Nirvana, Soundgarden, Nick Drake, Radiohead of course Jeff Buckley and Elliott Smith (I listen different kind of music like new wave depeche mode, tears for fears, the Smiths, but also Linkin park, Neil Young, Rush, Other different stuff) but also love Opeth music and obviously the more introspective acoustic stuff and I always find comfort in this lyrics, don't have social media. Feeling inadequate, feeling awful, low self esteem, feeling hyper sensitive and find difficult to deal with people. I struggle with ADHD, dysthimia, anxiety disorders and avoidant disorder. I leave a toxic situation of unsustainble rhythms of job and high cost of life. My relathionship ended and it takes 2 years for processes all the pain that this person had caused to me and before , I was suffered from chronic stress, burnout and start drinking too much in loneliness (but now is one year and 5 months completely healthy and without alcohol of course I don't smoke, . Come back to my fam home at 34 now 35.

Society view me as a loser. But I prefer be a loser and take care of my mental health.

When you listen this toxic messages for masculinity gurus (like Jordan Peterson , Robert Greene , Jay Shetty, Mel Robbins and Scott Galloway) that say that you need to always be strong, be aviable economically for a woman ( you worth only if you have money because women find men with less money less attractive), don't show your sensitivity or "oversensitivity" or fragility with a woman, because they made fun of you and they want a fucking "alpha male" strong, with money , provider and procreator and masculine, so you start to feel so inadequate and so lonely, because maybe you get hurt by invalidation of feelings. To me this concepts reinforce my insecurities about self esteem and tell that you are not worth if you are not into this standard. And this gender role models for men to me are solo toxic. As a man I always felt shamed when you say this stupid rethorics. I felt like an alien when I was young, in was not so good at primary school, get bullied, in was the sensitive kid. My ex friends betrayed me , steal my first gf and I was so hurried that I start to close myself to the world because I fear to deal with pain again, I passed anger , sadness, depression and was totally embarassed. But hey guys, music always helped,now I am more aware of myself , I do therapy, exercise, running, meditation, listen to music, reading books, know myself better and of course I delete social media. I don't have anything but Reddit and YouTube and linkedin. I always struggle to be ok to the external world for my sensitivity and intestinal issues. It is so complicated because sometimes I feel like an alien in this ultracompetitive, aggressive, asshole world.

What kind of songs had helped you through the process of grief??