A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. Proverbs 15:1

I am keeping this verse in my heart and mind today, I thank God for a new day where I can be a better person, mother, and wife.

embryo is a **boy (XY)** with:
**Low mosaic trisomy 14**
**High mosaic partial monosomy 9p24.3–p23 (11 Mb)**
Has anyone transferred an embryo with a similar **+14 / -9p complex mosaic** result?
If so, how did it turn out—implantation, pregnancy, amnio/NIPT, and ultimately baby?
I’d really appreciate hearing any experiences, good or bad. ❤️

Hey guys. Wandering how long you waited to work out after your laparoscopy or what was suggested for you? I like incorporating weights in my work outs.
Also sex…? I’m on day 8. Had a hysteroscopy and d&c with this..

I need some outside perspective because I genuinely don't know if I'm being unreasonable here.
My husband coached softball for about two years. He recently had to stop because he wanted to focus on starting his new business. There is one particular teenage girl he coached who he has always had a very obvious soft spot for.

She has had a difficult childhood/family situation. Her uncle eventually had to take custody of her and raise her. My husband says part of the reason he feels so strongly about helping her is because of what she's been through. He also genuinely thinks she's one of the best players he coached.

For context, my stepdaughter is around the same age and was also on the team. She's not particularly good at softball and eventually stopped enjoying it. My husband and I have talked about this other girl quite a bit because he has always wanted to help her get opportunities based on her talent. At one point, he was even trying to find other teams/places for her to play after he stopped coaching.

Ive brought up another girl who wasn't as good of a player but was going through an even worse situation at the time. I basically said that if his reasoning for having such a soft spot for this particular girl was because of her difficult life, then shouldn't he also be concerned about this other girl? I also brought up my own childhood and how I didn't have anyone taking me to sports or giving me opportunities like that.

He got extremely defensive, and the argument pissed me off because I felt like I couldn't even question his reasoning without him getting angry. He blamed some of his irritability on having recently quit smoking.

Anyway, this former player is now going to do some kind of skills session/tryout with a college where she's been accepted and will apparently be playing. My husband wants to go watch because he says he wants to see what kinds of things they'll have her doing. He also offered to pay the $50 fee because he doesn't think her uncle can afford it.

Here's another part that bothers me: my husband is actually the one who introduced this girl to a woman who helped set this opportunity up. Now this woman apparently won't give my husband all the details about exactly what time/how long the session will be and told him to just ask the player directly.
My husband calls this woman a "cunt" because of that, which I also find excessive.
At first, my husband didn't invite me to go with him to watch this session.
Then later he apparently thought about it and invited me, but by that point I said no.

And honestly, the whole thing feels fucking weird to me.
It's not that I think a former coach can never support a former teenage player. I understand wanting to help a talented kid succeed, especially if you know they've had a difficult life. But there's something about the combination of how emotionally invested he is in this particular girl, wanting to personally pay for her session, wanting to go sit there and watch her for an hour, and initially not even thinking to invite his wife that makes me uncomfortable.
Maybe I'm completely overthinking this. Maybe this is totally innocent and he's simply being a supportive former coach who believes in a talented kid.

But I can't get past how intense his interest in this one girl seems to be, especially compared with the other players.
And what really bothered me was how defensive he became when I questioned it. It makes me feel like I'm crazy for even noticing any of this.

So, am I being unreasonable here? Is this just a former coach being supportive, or does the overall situation seem like it's crossing a boundary?

Was a round of two week doxycycline course enough to get rid of your endometritis? Did you test again? How did you know it was gone?

I’m looking for experiences from anyone who has been in a similar situation, especially anyone with stage 3 endometriosis who conceived naturally after laparoscopic surgery.
For some background, I have one child who is 13, so I have conceived and carried a pregnancy successfully before. I’m now dealing with secondary infertility. After trying for about a year, we moved to IVF, and I recently had a hysteroscopy, laparoscopy, and D&C after two failed embryo transfers — one completely failed to implant and the other was a PGT-A tested embryo that resulted in a chemical pregnancy.
My surgery ended up finding quite a few things:
Stage 3 endometriosis
Endometriosis implants on both ovaries
A small right ovarian endometrioma, just under 2 cm
My right ovary was displaced/out of position, but my surgeon was able to free it and put it back into position
Some of the endometriosis was removed
My tubes were flushed and both were open
Endometritis was found, and I’m doing about 2 weeks of doxycycline
A cervical polyp was found and removed
A uterine/endometrial polyp was also found and removed
I had the hysteroscopy/D&C at the same time
I was also told that my cervix is quite long and positioned toward the left. Is a cervix being “too long” ever a problem for sperm getting where they need to go, or is that not really a thing?
So now I’m trying to figure out what all of this could mean for my chances of conceiving naturally.
Before surgery, I assumed IVF was probably my only realistic option after trying naturally for a year without success. But now that the polyps are gone, the endometritis is being treated, some of the endometriosis was removed, my ovary was put back into position, and we know my tubes are open, I’m wondering if trying naturally for a few cycles might actually be worth considering.
I also had a chemical pregnancy from one of my embryo transfers, so I know implantation can happen, even though unfortunately that pregnancy didn’t continue.
I’d especially love to hear from anyone who has experienced:

Stage 3 endometriosis and natural conception after laparoscopic surgery

A small endometrioma (around 2 cm) and how it affected fertility

Endometritis treated with doxycycline after failed transfers

Polyps being removed and then subsequently conceiving

Trying naturally for a few cycles after surgery before doing another FET

Having open tubes and improved pelvic anatomy after surgery

A previous live birth followed years later by secondary infertility/endometriosis

A failed transfer followed by a chemical pregnancy and then a successful pregnancy

I know everyone’s situation is different, and I’m not expecting Reddit to tell me what I should do. I’m really just trying to understand whether I’m being overly hopeful, or whether there’s actually a legitimate possibility that addressing all of these issues has improved my chances enough to try naturally.

And honestly… it would have been really nice to know about all of this before using two very good embryos. 🥲 I’m trying not to dwell on that, but it’s definitely hard not to wonder if some of these issues were affecting the transfers.
I’d really appreciate hearing both the positive stories and the realistic ones. ❤️

I need some outside perspective because I’m really angry right now and I don’t know if I’m being unreasonable.
My husband goes away mostly every year with his friends for a golf tournament. We have talked about him stopping going because I’m not comfortable with these weekends, and we had discussed it before this year. Despite that conversation, he decided to go again this year.

There’s also another important part of our marriage: we have an agreement of zero alcohol in our marriage. This is something we have mutually agreed to, so alcohol is a boundary/commitment in our relationship.

Before he left, he specifically told me that if I needed him, I could call him anytime and that he would answer his phone.
Tonight, around 10:30 PM, I called him and he didn’t answer. I waited about an hour and called him again, and he still didn’t answer. I’ve also texted him twice and have gotten no response. It’s now almost midnight and I still haven’t heard from him.

I’m honestly pissed.

I’m not saying I know he’s drinking or doing anything inappropriate. I genuinely don't know what he’s doing. But because this is a golf weekend with his friends, and because we have a zero-alcohol agreement in our marriage, the fact that I can’t get ahold of him makes me even more uncomfortable.

The bigger issue for me is that we had already discussed him stopping these weekends, he knew I wasn’t okay with him going, and he chose to go anyway. Then he specifically reassured me that I could call anytime and he would answer—and now I’ve called twice, waited an hour between calls, texted twice, and still haven't gotten a response.

I understand that being married doesn’t mean he can never spend time with his friends or go away without me. I’m not trying to control every minute of his weekend. But I do feel like there should be some consideration for your spouse, especially when you’ve made specific agreements together.
Right now I feel like he’s acting like a single bachelor for the weekend instead of someone who is married and has commitments and boundaries within his marriage.

I’ve stopped contacting him because I don’t want to blow up his phone. But I’m sitting here almost at midnight, angry and wondering if I’m justified or if I’m being controlling.

Am I wrong for being this upset?

Edit: years ago maybe five years ago we went on a family vacation to Florida with our kids. He got really drunk one of those nights and wanted to go out, I was tired and didn’t feel like it. Well he decided to go alone and I was fine with that, but then he ended up at some strip club super drunk, wallet stolen and credit cards as well. He came back to the Airbnb and passed out, I check his phone and see that he was texting a sex worker and I saw pictures and messages and it seemed like if she wasn’t as far as she was he would’ve went. So he didn’t cheat but he kinda did…. Ever since that happened I told him if he wanted to be with me alcohol has to be completely out of the picture and he needs to work on building trust back up with me. He kept saying it wasn’t him texting this woman and that someone took his phone and was texting her, not him. It doesn’t matter but these kind of things leave a mark. I’ve never brought it up again and we took couples therapy and all but that’s always in the back of my head and even more now.

Hi everyone!
Yesterday I had a laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, D&C, and HSG. So far, recovery has been going pretty well. I'm able to get up, shower, and do a little light cleaning, but I'm trying not to overdo it.

They did find endometriosis, but I have no idea what stage yet. The surgeon spoke with my husband while I was still waking up, and he couldn't remember all the details, so I'm anxiously waiting for my follow-up appointment. I do know I picked a great surgeon, which gives me some peace of mind. We also tested for CD138, but those results won't be back for another week or so.

A little background: after trying to conceive for over a year, we moved on to IVF. Everything went well until the transfers. Before my first transfer, I did two months of Lupron, followed by a medicated transfer that completely failed. We skipped a cycle, then did a modified natural transfer, which ended in a chemical pregnancy.

My fertility specialist had been recommending removing an endometrioma on my right ovary (just under 2 cm) because it kept showing up on ultrasounds. I declined because I didn't think it was the reason for my failed transfers. However, I did agree to the laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, and D&C so we could finally stage my endometriosis and fix or remove anything else that might be contributing.

As far as I know, everything went well during surgery. One thing I did learn is that my left ovary was tucked under my uterus. I'm not sure if my surgeon was able to correct that, so that's another thing I'll ask at my follow-up. My husband said the surgeon also mentioned that if we wanted to try conceiving naturally, we could.

We still have a few frozen embryos, so if conceiving naturally doesn't happen, we'll move forward with another transfer.

For those of you who had excision surgery before trying again, did it make a difference? Were you able to conceive naturally or have more success with IVF afterward?
I'm also trying to figure out what dietary changes might help keep my endometriosis under control. I've read that cutting back on processed foods, sugar, gluten, and red meat while focusing on an anti-inflammatory, antioxidant-rich diet can help.

But... I really love my morning coffee. 😅 Did any of you give up caffeine? I've also heard people recommend avoiding dairy and even chocolate, which honestly sounds pretty miserable.

I'd love to hear what changes you've made after surgery and whether you felt they made a difference. Thanks so much!

Hi everyone!
Yesterday I had a laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, D&C, and HSG. So far, recovery has been going pretty well. I'm able to get up, shower, and do a little light cleaning, but I'm trying not to overdo it.

They did find endometriosis, but I have no idea what stage yet. The surgeon spoke with my husband while I was still waking up, and he couldn't remember all the details, so I'm anxiously waiting for my follow-up appointment. I do know I picked a great surgeon, which gives me some peace of mind. We also tested for CD138, but those results won't be back for another week or so.

A little background: after trying to conceive for over a year, we moved on to IVF. Everything went well until the transfers. Before my first transfer, I did two months of Lupron, followed by a medicated transfer that completely failed. We skipped a cycle, then did a modified natural transfer, which ended in a chemical pregnancy.

My fertility specialist had been recommending removing an endometrioma on my right ovary (just under 2 cm) because it kept showing up on ultrasounds. I declined because I didn't think it was the reason for my failed transfers. However, I did agree to the laparoscopy, hysteroscopy, and D&C so we could finally stage my endometriosis and fix or remove anything else that might be contributing.

As far as I know, everything went well during surgery. One thing I did learn is that my left ovary was tucked under my uterus. I'm not sure if my surgeon was able to correct that, so that's another thing I'll ask at my follow-up. My husband said the surgeon also mentioned that if we wanted to try conceiving naturally, we could.

We still have a few frozen embryos, so if conceiving naturally doesn't happen, we'll move forward with another transfer.

For those of you who had excision surgery before trying again, did it make a difference? Were you able to conceive naturally or have more success with IVF afterward?
I'm also trying to figure out what dietary changes might help keep my endometriosis under control. I've read that cutting back on processed foods, sugar, gluten, and red meat while focusing on an anti-inflammatory, antioxidant-rich diet can help.

But... I really love my morning coffee. 😅 Did any of you give up caffeine? I've also heard people recommend avoiding dairy and even chocolate, which honestly sounds pretty miserable.

I'd love to hear what changes you've made after surgery and whether you felt they made a difference. Thanks so much!

What do you think about the CRNA program at UofL? How is it comparable to Bellarmine if you know anything about theirs? Thanks!

What do you think about the CRNA program at UofL? How is it comparable to Bellarmine if you know anything about theirs? Thanks!

Hey everyone,
I have a laparoscopy scheduled for next week, and my surgeon will also be taking a look inside my uterine cavity. My fertility specialist has suggested removing my endometrioma, which is just under 2 cm.
My concern is that although I have frozen embryos, I'd still like to preserve my fertility. I'm worried that removing the endometrioma could affect my ovarian reserve and lower my AMH. Because of that, she also mentioned the option of draining it instead. However, while researching drainage, I've read that unless ethanol sclerotherapy is used, the cyst often comes back, and there may be other issues I'd rather avoid.
A little background: I have suspected endometriosis, and this surgery should finally allow it to be diagnosed and staged if it's present. After my egg retrieval, I did two months of Lupron Depot before transferring a PGT-A euploid embryo in a modified medicated FET, which completely failed. My second FET was a modified natural cycle, and that ended in a chemical pregnancy.
At this point, I really don't want to keep transferring my PGT-A embryos without addressing anything that could be affecting implantation.
For those of you who've been in a similar situation, what would you do? Would you remove the endometrioma, drain it, or leave it alone? If you've had yours removed or drained, how did it affect your fertility or IVF outcomes?
I've also been reading about ethanol sclerotherapy, and it seems like it may offer a lower recurrence rate while being less damaging to the ovary. Has anyone here had that procedure? I'd really appreciate hearing your experiences before I make a decision.
Thanks so much!

Hey everyone,
I tested today at 5dp6dt after a modified natural FET. I kept telling myself I wasn't going to test early, but I caved because my husband is leaving tomorrow on a short trip with his dad. He won't be here when I get my beta on Friday, and I wanted us to be together for whatever the result was.
Unfortunately, it was negative.
Now I'm spiraling a bit and wondering if it's because I used a Pregmom test, if I just implanted later and it's too early, or if the embryo didn't implant at all. What's your take? Was 5dp6dt too early to test?
If this transfer doesn't work, I don't think we'll jump straight into another FET. We have three more PGT-A tested embryos, but this would be my second failed transfer (my first was a medicated transfer, and this one was a modified natural transfer after two months of Lupron). I have a small endometrioma (chocolate cyst) on my right ovary that's about 1.5 cm, and my RE thinks it could be contributing to implantation issues.
At this point, I'd rather have a laparoscopy before transferring another embryo. I don't want to keep spending money and using embryos without first addressing anything that could be affecting implantation.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? I'd really appreciate hearing your experiences.

[removed]

I keep telling myself I will wait until my beta in four days but I’m just wondering if anyone here tested 5dp6dt after ovidrel shot. Today is 12 days since the shot. I’m not sure if it’s still in my system or not. I’m afraid to test anyway, and I am also afraid to do my beta. This was my second transfer, the first one was a medicated transfer (failed) and this one is a natural modified 4aa pgta embryo.

[removed]

I'm 33 and have a 2.something cm endometrioma on my right ovary. My first medicated FET with a PGT-tested embryo unfortunately failed. I also did two months of Lupron beforehand, so we already tried that approach. This month we're doing a modified natural FET, and I'm really hoping this is the one. 🤞
That said, I'm also trying to think ahead. If this transfer doesn't work, I asked my RE to refer me to a surgeon for a laparoscopy. My thought process is that if they remove the endometrioma (and any endometriosis they find), it might improve my chances with future transfers. A part of me also wonders if I could even conceive naturally afterward. I know there's no guarantee, but my body has done it before—I had a spontaneous pregnancy 14 years ago that resulted in a live birth.
At this point, I'd rather look into surgery than keep transferring embryos if endometriosis could be part of the problem.
Has anyone with an endometrioma around this size had a lap? Did it help your FET success or lead to a natural pregnancy? I'd love to hear your experiences, whether positive or negative.

Hi everyone,
I’m 33 and my husband is 45. I have a 13-year-old child from a previous relationship, but we've been struggling with infertility now, and honestly, it’s been really hard.
Last month we transferred our first PGT-tested embryo, and unfortunately it failed. I have suspected endometriosis—I have pretty much all the symptoms, but I’ve never had laparoscopic surgery to officially diagnose it. My fertility specialist thinks it’s likely stage 3 or 4 based on my symptoms.
Before the transfer, my RE recommended 2 months of Lupron Depot instead of surgery. We did that, and because the Lupron suppressed everything, we had to do a fully medicated transfer to help rebuild my lining. Everything looked great—my lining reached 11 mm—and we were feeling hopeful. But the transfer still failed.
I’m scheduled for another transfer next month, this time as a modified natural cycle. Yesterday my husband asked why we haven’t considered laparoscopic surgery. He’s been reading about excision/laser surgery for endometriosis and wonders if removing the disease could improve our chances, or maybe even allow us to conceive naturally.
My fertility specialist feels that the Lupron has already addressed the endometriosis for now and that we should just move forward with another transfer. I’m not sure how much truth there is to that versus actually having surgery.
Right now I’m on a progesterone-only birth control pill to keep the endo under control and prepare for the next transfer, so I have no idea whether natural conception would even be possible at this point.
I’m exhausted from this roller coaster and trying to figure out the best next step.
For those with endometriosis:
Did laparoscopic excision/ablation surgery help you?
Did anyone have success after Lupron Depot without surgery?
If you had a failed transfer after Lupron, did you change anything before your next transfer?
Would you push for surgery before transferring another PGT embryo?
I’d really appreciate hearing your experiences. ❤️

Has anyone ever gotten to the point in IVF where you were just completely done with the hormones after a failed transfer and decided to take a break / stop the protocol changes because it was seriously affecting your mental health and relationship?

For context: my first FET was a fully medicated cycle after about 2 months of Lupron. My lining looked great, everything looked “perfect,” but it still failed.
Now I’m scheduled for another transfer in July (likely around the 17th–24th window). My doctor mentioned possibly doing a natural or modified natural cycle this time, but I’m honestly not even sure what the best option is anymore.

Right now I’m on a mini pill and I really want to stop it because the hormones from my medicated transfer have me spiraling emotionally and I honestly would rather be on nothing right now and let my body just breathe and reset. I feel really overwhelmed and like I need a break from everything hormonally.

I’ve also been on birth control so many times before like transfer or ivf and it’s starting to feel exhausting and frustrating. Part of me worries I’ll never know what my body can do on its own after Lupron if I keep staying on and off hormones like this, and I just want a chance to see what happens naturally, even if it delays things.
I don’t want to mess anything up with my cycle or my chances, but I also feel like I can’t keep going like this mentally right now.

Has anyone taken a step back like this and felt better afterward? Did anyone actually conceive during a natural “break” cycle or after stepping away from meds for a bit?
I’m just really burnt out and could use hearing others’ experiences.