u/NoScore2178

Not that anyone is asking why, but i learned that i was showing symptoms of codependency through a friend

And ever since I've been doing all i can to heal

My boyfriend? Who I've been hurting for far too long by leeching?? I took steps to make things better, but that also make me more alone with myself

I dont really talk to my friends, and so when I got up and into a gc with them i leeched (they dont seem to be affected the same way, personally, intimately affected like my lover was) onto them as well :((

After breaking down at work at least twice i realized that im scared of being alone by myself

I dont know if i can trust myself, and thats so horrifying to me it led to those breakdowns

(I am also on hormones so that probably "helped")

But i got in contact with a therapist, and it might js be the holiday (America day, baby, yay to... this country that hates me :< awesome) but I've noticed that even when she isn't returning my calls, not reaching back out-

Matter a fact, i race to check any notification on my phone, to pull myself away from me

It seems like now that i know the issue, know the fear, and know the consequences of being unhealthy like this

That suddenly its all too real

Im scared of myself

Im not happy

Im dirty and gross

Im further from the boy i love more than ever

And im piss fucking poor

The country hates my kind

My brain hates my mind

All i do is bed rot

For me, it all comes back to one thing

Girlfailure.

Im a fucking perverted unhealthily needy little fucking girlfailure.

I dont wanna hurt like this, i dont wanna be scared like this, and i especially dont want to hurt others like this

Yet i seem to do them all just fine

Fucking girlfailure

Hail satan ❤️

as the title says, i have my xppen shortcut remote (brand new and works wonders) until i tried the rotate

the zoom works, brush size works, scroll as well

its just the rotate

it doesnt rotate and i dont know how to fix it :,)

please helpppp :3

So ive only literally taken 2 shots of E so far, and unless ive entirely misunderstood breast development, is this is placebo?

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And also going forward sorry if this gets a bit graphic or "inappropriate" yk :3

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So, as ive said, so far only ive taken my 2 shots of E, im very fresh and new on hrt, but im noticing that my nipples are far more sensitive in a "simple sensation" way

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Usually there would only be a feeling if i like, pinch or rub or otherwise

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But now they're like, *hyper* sensitive. As in like, just touching them is now a sort of big sensation now as well

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I dunno if im explaining this well

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I know that bodies react to estrogen differently, and im certainly not gonna complain if by the "grace of god" im getting actual breasts this early

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I personally think it *is* placebo, but i dont care, it makes me feel like something is happening :3

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Blleeeeee

So, while im on estrogen for feminization, (enanthate injections if curious), I know that if i dont use my dick, if im not beating it like it owes me money (joking) then it will eventually just stop working entirely, atrophy, thanks to the estrogen

Now, if i wanted it gone completely, I wouldn't be here, atrophy would be the goal

But eventually I want to get a PPV, however long, strenous and yucky it may be

And simply put i dont want it to atrophy :,)

I dont know if just jerking off is enough, or if i need to be brought to orgasm (i squeeze right as i to stop a load actually being blown), or if being brought to gasm is actually bad bc that produces testosterone (since i have balls and they kinda yk, produce testosterone)

Help me out here please :,)

I know of a few methods so far

Theres the horse piss method, which is super not doable by "ol average jane"

Theres the yams method, where you turn the diogen- something into progesterone and then into (t)est(oste)ro(ne)gen (the two can be derived from it i read)

And then theres the powder method, where you get powdered E and mix it with castor oil and then use it like that

Those are the methods i know of

I personally use estra *enanthante* in the form of injections

So please, help me out in discovering and extrapolating these methods 🙏🏻🙏🏻

Love yall, queers!! <3

It was this maybe twitter post of a person saying like

"A woman is someone.." and then it listed that with different things that ordinary cis women are born with, like wombs n uteruss n the ability to have eggs n periods

And out of the quotes it easily broke it 😭 "woman can be born without uteruss" or whatever the variation was to debunk the argument bc yeah

There is no way to define all biological woman without including all trans women

:3