u/Ok-Dark2500

I keep wondering what a soulmate actually is. I thought loving would be so easy. I think about my ex, and I keep wondering why it was so hard...when the truth is, I made it hard.

When we first met, I was so set on her. I told everyone about her before we were even anything. I was just drawn to her in a way I couldn't explain. On our first date, I couldn't stop looking at her. She’s stunning. All I could think about was how I couldn't wait to introduce her to my family and how eager I was for her to be mine. She was cautious at first, told me I was love bombing so I chilled out...probably in the worst way. I will admit that while I was waiting for her to finally open up to me, I kept texting or going back to my ex-situationships. I was scared my ex wouldn't pick me, so I just kept cycling back through the people that I knew were probably still waiting. I know it's messed up. I don't know why I did it, but I asked her if she even wanted to be with me ever, and she said yes, so I stopped talking to them. Finally, we got together. I couldn't believe someone as kind, smart, and beautiful as her would want to be with someone like me. I’d never been in a committed relationship before but with her, I didn't want to walk away.

As I integrated my ex into my life, I kept getting more scared. I asked her once what happens if we do all of this and just end up getting hurt, and she told me that’s the point of a relationship: you try and you keep going together. She said love is something people fight for and right now, we're just seeing if that's even a possibility for us. But back then, I thought having those doubts meant she wasn't "my person." I thought loving would be easy. I thought i wouldn't be scared if this was actually my person.

When we were together, everything felt perfect. Maybe it was the honeymoon phase but even then I think about the days we just hung out. We always had so much fun. When we had any disagreements, we'd actually hear and talk it out. She was so good at expressing herself. At times, we both got emotional, but it was always a mature conversation. But whenever I was away from her, I’d get completely in my head, spiraling over questions like "What if she's not the one?" or "Why am I falling for a girl who didn't even like me to begin with?" I made up so many scenarios that weren't real. If I had all these questions, then maybe I shouldn't be serious with her. People always say that they know they're going to get married to the person they're with early on, but I really just couldn't imagine it anymore. I knew it was possible, but it felt too serious for me so early on. I pushed her away, stopped replying, shut down, and stopped being the person I promised I’d be. When she asked me about it, I just told her I didn't care for her anymore. I don't know if that was true, but looking back today, I’m still thinking about her and I still care so much.

They say a soulmate is the one person who makes life easy—someone who makes it safe to share your feelings, makes you feel heard, and talks you through things. She did all of that for me, but I couldn't meet her there. Did I just push away my soulmate?

I hurt the kindest, most understanding person to ever exist. She had been hurt so many times in her life, and she trusted me not to do that to her. She saw past my past, laughed and danced with me, played silly games, and was happy doing absolutely nothing together as long as we were in the same room. She was confident, beautiful, and proud to hold my hand and show me off because I had convinced her I was the one.

Instead, I became the exact person I used to hate—the one who broke her heart. I was so harsh when we ended things, and I keep replaying that final night over and over, wishing I had chosen different words. Like would we still be together if I just heard her out? I feel like I embarrassed her, disappointed my friends, and hurt the one person who gave me every benefit of the doubt. I don't know if there's any way to fix this, but the regret is eating me up.

My (28M) first love was an anxiously attached girl 28F. I don't think I am emotionally mature enough yet to go back into the dating scene, but I want to. It's been over a month since we broke up. I still think about her but the feelings fluctuate. I just feel bad for how I treated someone so patient, loving, understanding, and thoughtful. I told her I didn't love her anymore, but now I'm realizing that I loved her so much to the point where I didn't want to keep loving her because of how much it might hurt to love her. Now, I'm trying to see if anyone was able to get over their first love, knowing it was their fault. I just don't know how I'm gonna love again.

Interested in knowing if our feeds are all similar, specifically the FA content. Do you see content that talks about how to improve your insecurities as a FA? Do you see content that essentially validates FA behavior? Do you see content that explains FA behavior? Do you see content that explains your partner's attachment-style? Do you just never see FA content at all -- mainly brain rot.

How does it affect you?

I'm FA myself. I mainly get brain rot on my feed, but I started searching FA attachment styles to learn more about myself over the last few days.

I’m 29M and my ex is 29F. We only dated for a few months, but somehow the relationship feels much bigger than the amount of time we were actually together. We were extremely compatible in a lot of ways. We had fun together, conversation was effortless, and she was one of the easiest people I’ve ever been around. I genuinely loved doing even boring everyday things with her. My friends loved her too. I told people I thought she might be the one. I had never felt so confident about wanting to spend my time with someone, but the more she cared about me, the more scared I became. At one point we basically stopped saying “I love you.” She later told me she had stopped saying it because she could tell how uncomfortable it made me. She was actually the person who helped me realize I might have avoidant tendencies. She’s more anxiously attached, but she was incredibly patient with me. She tried hard not to overwhelm me and did a lot to make me feel safe in the relationship. The more she tried, the more irritated I sometimes became.

I still don’t know whether I was actually irritated with her or irritated with myself because I knew I wasn’t giving her what she needed. She wanted more affection, reassurance, communication, and effort. I knew that and that’s the part I have the hardest time understanding. There were so many moments where I knew exactly what would make her feel loved. I wanted to reassure her. I wanted to be more affectionate. I wanted to open up. I wanted her to know how important she was to me. but I would still hold back.

What if I give everything to this relationship and it still fails? What if we aren’t actually meant to be together? What if I waste both of our time?

We actually broke up once because of this and then got back together because I promised I would change. Eventually, the same fears came back.

The last time, I told her I was scared and that I couldn’t imagine marrying her. I convinced myself that our families, lifestyles, and backgrounds were too different for us to work long-term. But looking back, we never actually sat down and seriously worked through what a future together would look like. Honestly, everything about us was pretty compatible. We wanted the same things. We never really gave our families a chance to understand what we were considering. I think I assumed that if my family truly wanted me to be with her, they would have shown more excitement about the relationship. Because they didn’t, moving forward with her sometimes felt like I was betraying them.

She kept trying to have conversations about the future with me. I kept avoiding them. Eventually, she did what was best for herself and ended the relationship about a month ago. Since then I’ve mostly felt numb. I work, go to the gym, go home, and repeat. On weekends I drink and distract myself, but I think about her constantly.

There were moments during the relationship where I genuinely felt like I loved her. Other times I questioned everything. That’s still happening now. Sometimes I desperately want her back. Other times I wonder whether I actually miss her specifically or whether I miss having someone love me the way she did. I know I loved her sometimes though. Part of me wants to contact her. She was always incredibly understanding, and I know that if I told her what I was going through, she would probably listen, but that almost makes me feel worse about contacting her.

She already spent so much of the relationship trying to understand me. I don’t know if reaching out now because I’m hurting would just be asking her to emotionally take care of me again after I hurt her. At the same time, I’m terrified that if I leave her alone, work on myself, and eventually realize I truly wanted a life with her, she’ll have completely moved on. I know she deserved more than what I was giving her.

What I can’t figure out is whether losing her has finally made me appreciate what I had, or whether I’m romanticizing the relationship because she’s gone. Has anyone else pushed someone away while they were in the relationship, only to realize afterward how deeply they actually cared about them?

And if you were the person who caused most of the hurt, did you leave your ex alone and work on yourself, or did you eventually reach back out? Or, both?

ISO of a platform where healthcare professionals present de-identified clinical cases without disclosing protected health information or violating HIPAA. It would be interesting to learn how physicians across different specialties approach both common and uncommon cases - including their clinical reasoning, differential diagnosis, diagnostic workup, treatment or procedural plan, care-team coordination, patient disposition, follow-up, and eventual outcome.

Did you do content review? Did you only do questions? What resources helped you most? I have an extremely weak foundation, and it has been a year since I last studied.

I keep hearing conflicting advice about this, and I’m feeling really confused and frustrated. I’m 28F, 5'2", and my goal is simply to look leaner. I have the muscle, but I have what I'm assuming body fat covering it. My weight is 120lbs and the weight that I looked most lean in was 110lbs, so that is my goal weight.

For a long time, I was told that the best approach was to focus on weightlifting, progressive overload, and strength training rather than eating less. I’ve been doing that, but my weight has been increasing or fluctuating within the same 5-pound range, and my food noise and hunger seem to be getting louder rather than better.

I’ve also been told that I need to eat more, so I’ve made a conscious effort to do that. I used to regularly skip breakfast, but now I eat three meals a day plus a snack, and I’ve significantly increased my protein intake. I’m willing to continue with this approach, but I’m struggling because I’m now seeing so much advice online saying that fat loss ultimately requires a calorie deficit, often around 500 calories per day.

At the same time, I’ll talk to women around my height and weight who say they’ve successfully eaten around 1,200 calories per day for months and eventually stopped feeling as hungry. That leaves me wondering why I’m being encouraged to eat more when I have similar goals. I understand that everyone is different, but after years of trying to “figure out what works for my body,” I honestly don’t feel like I know anymore.

For context, I’ve been weightlifting consistently for about five years. I strength train 3–4 days per week, do Zone 2 cardio twice per week, Lagree once per week, take 1–2 recovery days, and average around 15,000 steps per day. Despite being very active and consistent, my weight continues to fluctuate within roughly the same 5 pounds.

I think what frustrates me most is how contradictory all of the advice feels. I hear “eat in moderation” and “don’t restrict,” but also “track your calories,” “prioritize protein,” “eat more,” and “you need to be in a deficit.” I understand that there probably isn’t one perfect formula, but after struggling with this for the past 3–4 years, I feel exhausted from constantly second-guessing what I’m doing.

I’m not looking for a crash diet or an extreme solution. I would just really appreciate some clear, practical guidance on how to determine what is actually appropriate for my body, activity level, hunger, and goals—and how to know whether I should be eating more, eating less, or changing something else entirely.

I got some rice krispies at the food pantry. I know I can make rice krispie treats, but I don't want to buy marshmallows. I was wondering if anyone had any other ideas I could use the rice krispies for?

My partner loves soccer. He plays soccer maybe twice per week. He also loves ManU lol

He's been talking about getting a soccer ball, so I thought it'd be nice to just get it for him for his bday, but I know NOTHING about soccer. Is this a good purchase?

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Decided to do a research year, but it feels weird to ask if I can mentor or research for someone. Not sure how to do this appropriately or professionally without sounding desperate or like a gunner. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

It's a complete switch. Looking into Dermatology or Plastics now.

I am over 21.

Need glasses that are at least affordable. Does anyone have any recommendations on how to get this?

I have a prescription from last year. All I need are the glasses. Any advice would be appreciated.

Noted in the title

It's just a grilled 5 beefy layer burrito with extra carbs.

Someone give me a better order

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I unfortunately exhausted all of my NBMEs up 26-32. I honestly do not remember NBME 26 at all. With that being said, I have 4 more weeks until I write Step 1. Which test would you recommend I do next?

I am saving Free 120 and 33 for my final week before I take step 1.

I am having trouble nailing down the autonomic pharmacology and physiology. Would anyone have any videos or recommendations on what they used to help them? I keep getting stuff mixed up.