u/Optimal_Fish_7029

I’m only 52lb down, but I’ve been lucky enough to also have some body recomp in that time

(I’ve been doing a lot of muscle strengthening and stretching specific to posture/pelvic floor/hips/deep core - so how I sit / stand / hold myself has massively improved)

I don’t know quite what I was expecting with this journey, but when I look back at the photos while I was gaining the weight I just look the same but a little bigger each photo

Now I look like I’m deflating or melting!

The weight seems to be leaving my upper body first and everything below my waist is sagging and looks bigger than before??

I mentioned this to my husband last night and showed him when I got out the shower and he gently pulled at my back and said I’ve nothing “pinchable” anywhere on my mid - upper back, shoulders or collarbones.

He said it like it’s this amazing thing (which I know on one hand it is!) but I really do look like all the weight that was there has just dropped into my hips and stomach and legs??

I don’t look like I’ve lost 50lb I just look like I’ve relocated it south of my ribcage!

I've no idea how to do this, apologies.

I have a spreadsheet full of cells marked "1" for each column.

I need to find a way to locate and highlight any instances of clusters of 12 (pink in the example below)

I know I can format to highlight duplicates, but is there a way to do this so any clusters of 12 are either highlighted or counted? Rather than just all duplicates?

https://preview.redd.it/5zkvshksaseh1.png?width=441&format=png&auto=webp&s=313130e291888e9b9ac9c2f1b398e44ce6219387

I really cannot stand it when I’m really wronged, or I’m rightfully angry at something done to me, and someone will say “don’t waste your energy on it” “they’re not worth the effort” or “just ignore them”

I’ve never understood why, then recently wondered if it’s related to the “sense of justice” thing and not being able to let things go

But recently it was said to me within minutes of someone being really shitty and it hit me that it makes me bristle SO much because it feels like they’re saying “mask the emotion and reaction” “don’t call it out” and I really really hate it

Does anyone else feel like this or am I overreacting

Obviously this doesn’t apply to everyone.

My brother and sister-in-laws do what I’ve always referred to as “bluetooth parenting”. If their kids are misbehaving (and I mean REAL misbehaviour not just kids being kids, such as climbing up to stand on the Christmas dinner table mid meal) they will stay seated and just repeat their children’s names, increasing the volume but never physically moving to address a behaviour.

When it inevitably doesn’t work they then swap to empty threats (I’m going to throw away your ipad/burn your toys) and inevitably they resort to outright ignoring the behaviour and saying “she’s doing it for attention so don’t give her it”

These same adults complain about how hard it is to raise these kids who have been kicked out of schools and sports teams and art classes due to bad behaviour, bullying and fighting.

My husband has said dozens of times in the past that he hates that they do this.

We have our own kid now (4) and she’s going through a sudden very defiant phase. I’m noticing that now the going is getting tough, my husband is suddenly giving three, four, five chances before actually standing up/moving to step in.

I’ve mentioned it to him and he’s so quick to agree and say he hates that he’s doing what his siblings do and he’ll work on it. But as soon as he’s tired or stressed, or our kid is in a particularly stubborn and difficult mood he immediately reverts back to sitting back and repeating the same sentence to her over again then getting furious when she’s still doing the bad behaviour on top of ignoring his half a dozen requests to stop.

I understand he’s fighting against how he was raised and what he’s seen but has anyone else experienced this either in themselves or a partner, and how did you break the behaviour?

July 2024 I was 368.4lb. I began walking (slowly) and easing into doing CICO. By the end of that November I’d lost 52lbs.

Then I broke my foot.
Then I got covid.
Then my mental health spiralled.

I spent 2025 and half of this year watching my weight creep back up and desperately hating myself.

Now I’ve found out I have a 4-5” cyst on my ovary which needs surgery or I risk rupture/torsion, and surgery isn’t a safe option at this BMI (345lb).

Since finding out, I’ve tried to ease myself into weight loss again and again but nothing was sticking. I have untreated Binge Eating Disorder that I’m awaiting EMDR therapy for, so I thought easing in wouldn’t be overly restrictive to avoid a relapse.

Well that’s not working so now I’m giving this every single atom of strength I have to go at it hard.

I’m in a 1,300kcal deficit (I know it’s a lot but it’s a safety net just in case a binge happens or if I make a mistake weighing food - which fortunately two weeks in hasn’t happened yet!)

And screw slowly working my way back up to my 3.5 mile walks. Two years ago I did that every day at a heavier weight, my body can do it, my mind hasn’t caught up yet. So I’m doing “Couch - 10k” (but instead of focussing on distance my aim is to make it to an hour straight running - even if slowly)

Today I managed day one, and ran for the first time since I was a literal child. And adding up the 8 minutes (in the slow pace) I did just over half a mile (0.6)

I’m mostly posting to keep myself accountable and to hopefully celebrate the beginning of a long strong journey to a healthier smaller self

ETA - just to get ahead of any concern about my deficit being too high.

No matter what my TDEE reaches as I lose weight; I’m committed to never go below 1,400kcal, even if that slows things later, I had a history of restrictive eating/borderline Anorexia as a pre-teen (ironically) so I’m trying to keep myself safe mentally.

I figured if I’m going to live on 1,400kcal long term and soon; I might as well get used to it now, and while I’m still bigger it gives me some leeway so a mistake doesn’t ruin anything.

Just picked up my 3yo from her first day in nursery (3hours a day - UK) and was told she wouldn’t stop sprinting around the room, then when she was redirected she lashed out and kicked over another child’s building blocks.

Then later she kept grabbing a little boy by the neck and shoulders trying to drag him with her, and she did this repeatedly.

I’m completely baffled. She’e never shown any behaviour like this before, and when we did settle sessions at the nursery last week there was absolutely no issues or behavioural issues, so why today?

How am I best handling this? I feel terrible for the other kids and just feel blindsided that this is where we’re at on her literal first day.

ETA: I’ve spoken to her, and at least have some clarification regarding her intention with the little boy. She was trying to tickle his neck. We’re having a chat about being too rough and not touching someone without asking. 🙃 Doesn’t excuse the sprinting/lashing out but some progress at least

To preface: I don’t mean the curtain like ones. And I have spent ages scouring the internet with no luck.

We recently added magnetic window screens to stop the onslaught of flies and moths circling our ceiling lights.

The screens involved sticking magnetic tape the entire way round the window frame then adding the mesh and second magnetic strip over that. The screen lifts away easily enough but snaps tightly on the top, bottom, and sides.

I’d absolutely love to find the same type of screen for our patio doors as they’re the only “windows” in our living room but to open them up invites all the creepy crawlies and neighbourhood cats.

The issue I have is I can only find screens that attach at the top and sides, not the bottom, so a good shove from next door’s cat is going open it up, not to mention spiders etc

So ideally I’m looking for something that has a magnetic strip all along the bottom too

Anyone here found anything like this in the UK?

(I’m happy to cut adhesive strips and mesh down to make it fit)

This is a genuine question. I don’t know if it’s some social norm I’m missing or I’m doing something wrong.

Why is it some people get so angry if I nap or sleep in? I don’t mean people who are dependant on me because I’m needed to be doing other stuff or whatever. I genuinely mean people who seem to find it almost disrespectful if someone else is sleeping while they’re not?

I grew up in a “no nap” “no sleeping late” family. My partner’s family are the same way.

Yet, they will all nap on a beach or poolside on days off. But if I was to take myself off to sleep in bed while they did that then they get irritated.

Why??

I’ve only just recently come to terms with the fact I was sexually assaulted.

Since the realisation I’ve had horrible memories resurface, some of which have made me realise why I used to enjoy certain things sexually that physically repulse me now.

I feel stupid for not realising that’s why I’d stopped enjoying aspects of sex, I’d just thought my tastes had changed. But now I realise they were triggering panic without understanding why.

I’d like to regain that part of my sexuality again I think but don’t know if that’s realistic.