u/Particular_Aide3744

Hi All,

Through college campus recruitment i got placed in a big MNC with a bond for 3 years and it's the worst decision i have ever made.

Feb 2020 : Prior one month to covid, I got placed in an MNC, and covid happened... We had online training and tests and i was added to a software dev team

The team consists of 6 Boomers who never believe in WLB and a manager who's okayish but keen on output.

I was new to the entire corporate environment, and i did my best to show what i got... I've been constantly nagged, and every single code of mine is doubted by seniors... Especially a guy named "A"... he's always rude and never guide us... If we ask a question, he will nag and criticize us... I was in constant stress so sometimes i misunderstand the requirements only to get nagged by him again and again

I'm a slow learner, but once I grasp something, i'll never forget...so i was expected to learn Angular in a fast-paced environment with continuous development happening...Also, I was expected to learn Gatsby/React/Node/Express, which i can't cope with...I somehow understood to an extent, only to get nagged twice by my manager—she asked me & my colleague in a meeting... We answered, but it was not accurate, and she kind of threw a tantrum and made us stop working on projects until we learned Angular.

Fast forward - 2022 - We had a critical client project, and i was working in both UI & API - UI - Next.js was completely new to me, and this senior "A" bullied me to the core...He nagged me, and it went to the extent of using bad words...i broke down and told my manager that I'm not fit to be a developer and asked her to put me in the testing team...

We had a meeting, and i told everything that this "A" did to me, and soon I had been shifted to another new dev team.

Feb 2022 - May 2022 : In the new dev team there is this guy named "K" and he was worse than 'A'.. he was working on a project, and it failed TERRIBLY, so he had his pressure, and the management forced him to resign, and he was serving notice... In this dev team i was given a task to implement SSO, which includes other teams to co-ordinate...idk what ADFS means, and i did my best to understand it...fck, even he shouts ./ nags me when i ask a doubt, and he even used to narrate how to respond to mail—only the content given by him should be in mail... Again one evening he nagged me to the core, and i broke down in the office, and i cried like hell at home... I'm traumatized by all of these incidents

After A left (May 2022 - May 2024): I had few opportunity to code but most of the time I used to manage vendors who were developing website for us ... i lost touch with coding, and I'm traumatized to the core that i get anxiety even if i think of coding

May 2024 - Apr 2025 - Worst time...filthy politics forced me to resign.

Present : It's been a year and idk what to do next and i lost my confidence in coding and i get anxiety...i doubt myself whether I'm fit to be a developer or not

Thanks for reading and Please guide me on what to do next