I just realized I look up to everyone else and assume they know what they're doing and that they know everything. I always go to them for advice. I'm very intelligent and I'm good at a lot of things but I'm full of self doubt and I question my own abilities and assume I'm doing things wrong.
So I accidentally fucked up my hormones and have been running on nothing(except spiro and finasteride) since stopping my patches(see my previous post). I had two years of progress. Since I am getting firsthand info on what it's like I thought I'd share.
Here's what changed:
My penis got bigger and spontaneous erections returned. I thought my mind was playing tricks on me but now I understand that this is what was happening.
My face skin is a little more oily and not as smooth as it was. Sad but not as bad as it was pre-transition.
I think my facial and stomach fat have shifted slightly.
It is harder to cry again
I don't get that full body yearning when I'm aroused. I miss it, I feel totally bored, sexually.
My legs are less plump.
What didn't change:
My boobs are still big
I still have a bit of a waist
My pelvic tilt is still there
My hair is pretty
My butt is still kinda plump
I still have fat on my hips
My skin is pretty soft
I don't have boy smell but I don't smell like a girl either. I smell like nothing.
Anyway I hope my body reboots quickly. I've officially started injections today.
A few days ago an email was sent out promoting a "Slavic adventure game." This email used the black sun and SS symbols in its header. The GOG account on Reddit gave a bullshit explanation saying nothing of substance, not even apologizing. If this is the kind of environment GOG fosters, I will no longer be purchasing from this company. I am Jewish and Transgender, both groups are targeted by fascists. I would ask for a refund on all of my games because I feel like I've wasted a lot of money on a company that at the very least, has no problem with Nazism, but something tells me it's already been used to back fascist orgs.
I put effort into everything, and invest energy into everyone I like and instead of just ghosting me or saying they don't want to hang out ever they pretend to enjoy talking to me and laugh at my jokes and listen to my issues but never want to do anything and never initiate or reciprocate. Don't let me share my soul with you if you don't want to receive it.
It seems like people like me for a while and then just stop.
Aiden playing hot and cold and slapping Carrie while pretending to be playful is fucking scary honestly. He willingly re-enters a relationship with Carrie before he is ready and proceeds to treat her like shit as revenge, which is super toxic and abusive. I feel like Carrie was fawning over him and just piling on the compliments to appease him. He's just another asshole nice guy.
We've been online dating for 25 days. I took the train and he took the ferry and we met up at the station, walked to a restaurant (he wore a mask inside but there was a lot of open space), and we watched Project Hail Mary. We kissed a lot and it was actually really nice. I'm glad I love kissing and I just didn't like the first couple guys because they were predators. We did a lot of cuddling and held hands through the whole movie. We couldn't keep our hands off each other! He walked me partway back to the station before he had to leave to catch his ferry.
I had a bit of a falling out with my unstable roommate who no longer lives here. I think he took the Switch 1 I gave him which uses his account. I tried to download a game card and found out that my Switch 2 is the Pass-Enabled Console. I can't contact my ex-roommate and deregistering doesn't do anything. Please help.
Edit: I called Nintendo Support and they helped me unlink his account
You could easily just dismiss the inconsistencies of character ages in Bananza and the Mario games by saying Nintendo doesn't care but I think that's boring.
Kongs age slightly faster than humans before their aging slows down a lot to eventually reach human rates and their lifespans are about equal. DK and Diddy are let's say, chronologically 13 and 10 but biologically 18 and 15 in the country games and Bananza, and biologically 25 and 21 in the Mario games, which take place about 11 years later.
Should it be as soon as possible, when it becomes serious, or when you've been together for a long time so that they understand you more? I'm dating a leftist autistic man and already talked about my experience being harassed for masking which he sympathized with and was angry for me. I really like him but I want to make sure we're going to be together before I ask him to commit to a lifestyle change.
Edit: I sent this to him:
As you know I am COVID-conscious and I wear a mask in public. Public health is really important to me as an autistic communist and as an individual who cannot afford to become more disabled than I already am. My mother deals with chronic pain and is immunocompromised. It costs a lot of money to be disabled. Heart issues, cancer and severe chronic illness such as ME/CFS are on the rise due to people not taking necessary precautions and you and I both know the government was lying when they said COVID was over and not that serious. It destroys your immune system and even vaccines will not prevent you from becoming disabled, they only make it less likely you will die while sick. They just wanted to put the working class back into the money making machine. The CDC is run by fascists and medical professionals do not care enough about disabled people. Scientific fact is being suppressed and distorted for the sake of "normalcy", which as a concept is reactionary and conservative. Trans people and Black people are more likely to suffer from COVID complications so it's not only a disability issue, but a queer, gender, racial, and class issue.
I'm telling you all this because I really like you and think you have a similar mindset to me. I hope you can respect my values and decisions to be safer and take this information to heart.
If you're unsure of whether you are up for taking precautions, you can think about it for a while and ask questions as we get to know each other more. I don't want to rush or pressure you and I would still love to see you this month. I'm just letting you know my intentions for the long term are to have a partner who will protect me and everyone as much as I do them.
Edit 2: he said he'll accommodate me
I can never tell when it starts but I'm pretty sure I get them often. Often my libido will increase, and I'll get cravings, muscle pain, and mood swings.