u/RhubarbPleasant2347

Worries

1 - 76F mother of my indian friend and her late-born daughter, 26F. After her hearing issue, she was wearing a hearing aid, but sometimes 76F is adamant about not wearing it when she goes out with her daughter, her husband, or a relative.

2- 76F once got a message from indian mobile SIM office about the unlimited calls + data plans, and sometimes from official messages from shops that give offers during festivals as normal messages. 76F started to say, "someone is watching my mobile activities". 26F, my friend, scolded her, and she repeatedly said it was a normal message from the company of the SIM and the shops she visited to buy clothes and jewels. Again, 76F said, "No, it is from that hacker who watches me. You don't know. You don't understand me." My friend, 26F, cried, saying how to stop this. (I advised 26F to tell her mother repeatedly it was a normal message only. I too have no idea)

3 - 76 F even with her hearing aid. She talks nonstop. This incident happened in a cloth shop; the saleswoman only asked, "For what festival are you taking clothes for?" 76F started to say the full history about her being a former working woman in the medical area (76F was a doctor at a young age), how she had her daughter, and her daughter who hates sarees while 76F was taking a saree for herself. The saleswoman just laughed, showing sarees in the shop. 26 F tried showing signals in her hands to talk less or stop talking, but now 76 F was not getting the signals. 76F mocked her daughter, and she told the saleswoman, "My daughter hates when I talk more. "

Questions :

1 - Now 76F and 78M, father of 26F is looking for a groom for 26F, even to the groom's family. (In India, mostly the man's family visits the woman's family to have the first woman glance before engagement and marriage)76F talks a lot and stops the groom and 26F from having a private conversation for 5 minutes on their first meet, saying, "We elders talk. That's enough for today. If you want to talk, we can fix your conversation for another day." Then, the groom's family or the 26F family did not call each other back. My doubt is: how 26 F convince 76F in the current generation that it is not normal to prepare for engagement or marriage before having a normal conversation as a date?

2- How does 26F worry that her 76F is not conscious about her money, as she spends a lot? 26F tried to stop 76F, and 76F still says, "I know what I am doing." How to stop her from spending money?

3 - Once 26F tried to take 76F for a medical check (therapist treatment). 76F said, "I am a doctor. I know about my own body". 76F refused therapist treatment? Any way to convince 76F to get treatment?

26 F used a Dell and Asus laptop.

In 2019, I had this Dell laptop that would shut down automatically if the plug were removed. I almost spent 5000 rupees to fix it. But I had to give up on my Dell laptop because my cousin wanted a second-hand laptop for her work.

Around 2021, I purchasedan Asus laptop. I am currently facing the same issue with the battery

In 2025, the battery cost 6000 rupees. I changed the batterye ( the laptop tech brother said it was a rare asus battery and hard to find). I changed the battery.

2026, asus laptop turned off automatically within 5 seconds when the plug was not connectedtoh my asus laptop.

Is it laptop inner uncleaned dust issue or did the laptop battery burned ? Can anyone give suggestion?

26 F used Dell and Asus laptop.

2019 year, I had this dell laptop where the laptop would shut automatically quickly if the plug was taken away, i almost spend 5000 rupees to fix it. But I have to give up on my dell laptop because my cousin wanted second hand laptop for her work.

Around 2021 I purchased Asus laptop. I am currently facing same issue with battery

In 2025 the battery cost 6000 rupees. I did change ( the laptop tech brother said it was rare asus battery and hard to find). I did change the battery.

2026 , asus laptop turned off automatically within 5 seconds when the plug is not connected with my asus laptop.

Is it laptop inner uncleaned dust issue or did the laptop battery burned ? Can anyone give suggestion?

Description

1 - 26F ( current age ) is an USA citizen and have oci card living in India with elder parents

2 - parents of 26F opened her saving account in india related bank when she was around 5 - 15 year old ( year around 2000s - 2010)

3 - around 2010 and 2011, parents and 26F lived in usa. But they returned india due to their personal issue.

4 - parents of 26F applied for her oci card after 2011. But they did not connect her SSN number in her India related bank account. Because no bank members told her parents about the difference between indian resident and non- indian resident ( NRI /OCI / PIO) . Instead they added her pan card using 49AA form and aadhar card in her bank account.

4 - Recently 26 F found her first freelancing job from that foreign freelancing site. Now the problem started with W9 form ( only used for usa citizen freelancers for tax apply form) submit got error issue ( website error maybe ).

5 - when 26F and her mother went to the India related bank for solution . The current bank staff said that 26 F need to convert her normal saving bank account into nre / nro account.

My questions

1 - is this really significant to convert her bank account into NRO /NRE account?

2 - what would you suggest?

3 - some people from usa still return to India with their children. Will they face same situation or did you solve them ? Can you explain how?

4 - 26F and family stayed in rented house in usa and do not have overseas address proof. they do not have connection with their former rent house. What 26F must do ?

5 - this is main question , i wanted to ask. 26F still add her ssn number in her India related saving bank account after long years living in india?

6 - After some conversations with 26F and her parents, 26 F learned 49AA form for pan card did ask for SSN ( indirectly called as TIN ). is that 49AA form for pan card considered in India related banks ?

I never want to ask this question in first place.

But I recently saw a movie shorts where a girl with low score in her 12 standard studies for NEET exam to avoid quick marriage. But her new NEET group friends slowly moved away from that girl as she took long time to answer properly. Those friends sat in hidden garden areas or separate hidden study tables to avoid seeing the girl , so the NEET group friends can study to get high marks in their NEET final exam. the girl as single person sits alone , reads on her own and she got 53 percent when the girl thought she would only get 50 percent

By seeing that girl in movie shorts, I (27F) felt that I (27F) am seeing myself from my school and college time.

In my school and college times , I asked some topper students of my class to help me with some of my subjects. What the topper students said I still remember few, " I want to study alone" , " I do not have time. I need to study with my friends( who were toppers) " , " I have to have study for my exam. If I do not get high scores , my parents will scold me. " , etc.

The toppers study hard. Even some of my teachers tried to connect me with toppers. Some toppers did help me for one day and next day when I went to ask other doubts , the same toppers would say, " i forgot what I studied for yesterday. You read on your own."

Some teachers did have open talks with toppers to explain about the studies and sometimes those teachers did share about their life history with toppers. The same teachers would only say to me , " Focus on studies"

I am not jealous . I felt hurt.

What do you think about this? Is this normal?

I never want to ask this question in first place.

But I recently saw a movie shorts where a girl with low score in her 12 standard studies for NEET exam to avoid quick marriage. But her new NEET group friends slowly moved away from that girl as she took long time to answer properly. Those friends sat in hidden garden areas or separate hidden study tables to avoid seeing the girl , so the NEET group friends can study to get high marks in their NEET final exam.

By seeing that girl in movie shorts, I (27F) felt that I (27F) am seeing myself from my school and college time.

In my school and college times , I asked some topper students of my class to help me with some of my subjects. What the topper students said I still remember few, " I want to study alone" , " I do not have time. I need to study with my friends( who were toppers) " , " I have to have study for my exam. If I do not get high scores , my parents will scold me. " , etc.

The toppers study hard. Even some of my teachers tried to connect me with toppers. Some toppers did help me for one day and next day when I went to ask other doubts , the same toppers would say, " i forgot what I studied for yesterday. You read on your own."

Some teachers did have open talks with toppers to explain about the studies and sometimes those teachers did share about their life history with toppers. The same teachers would only say to me , " Focus on studies"

I am not jealous . I felt hurt.

What do you think about this? Is this normal?

My mom (68F) wants me (27F - late born child ) to study for MBA when I already completed my msc computer science and unemployed from 2023. I was begging her to join me for digital marketing course without MBA degree from 2020 ( I found few colleges give MBA with digital marketing and few only give mba alone . I hate maths) . She started to become wall whenever I say with details about digital marketing course units and the exam details

I am not asking this for career advice. I noticed some things whenever she sees alliance profiles in WhatsApp - she read only the groom name, his job details, no horoscope, no viewing about his pictures and even no background checking about groom. She and my dad (70M ) says , " Why ask check for background when his bio data pdf so good? "

My parents advice me to not to ask about groom's finance ( my parents are not asking in conversation with groom parents. I found one of grooms had unimaginable loan) , not to ask whether the groom guy also know the house chores like cooking , cleaning etc ( when his parents directly asking me the same question ) some will do say this is normal. I felt uncomfortable with it.

How to make my parents listen to me, When my yelling also not working to my parents? Is it normal ?