u/RootsInThePavement

I have mental and physical disabilities, and it’s been so hard recently…I wish I were healthy. I feel so physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted at work and today I had the biggest cry I’ve had in a while. I feel so stupid, slow, and disgusted with myself.

I’ve applied for disability before and got denied, currently working on another application with plans to appeal if it gets denied again. I want to quit my job so badly, every second is spent in pain and full of so much anxiety. 😥

All I want right now is to sleep and cry

I’ve been doing physical therapy for my pelvic floor and am excited to say that I can put a tampon in now without resistance, scraping, or it getting immediately pushed out a bit! This is the first time in my adult life that I’ve been able to do that and it feels amazing. I now want to get a dilator set, somehow that now seems less intimidating to me.

I don’t know if this can be fully cured, but this feels really great emotionally 💚

I’m doing a program through Penn Foster to get certified as a vet assistant. I’m loving all of the learning but I’m struggling with physiology and anatomy. I know this is a course that would have to be taken for any medical education, but I swear it’s dragging on and on.

I’m not sure how much of this I need to know. I’m taking notes, doing flash cards, writing down the lesson summaries/key points, utilizing the downloadable charts and external links…even cheating a bit when I’m truly stumped. But I’m only getting 65%-75% on assessments. It feels like too much knowledge and it’s difficult to grasp. I’ve done great (80% to 100%) on every unit otherwise, but I’m wondering how much of this I will use vs. how much I’ll be applying OTJ. It’s getting really discouraging.