u/SignatureOk6535

I’m a 27 year old female civil litigation attorney in the US. I love what I do for a job in terms of developing strategy, problem-solving, research, and writing. Though the public speaking aspects make me nervous occasionally, I’m okay with practice and have gotten positive feedback in that area. My superiors at work generally seem to believe that I have a bright future as a lawyer.

What I’m not sure I can handle is the stress and overwhelming anxiety. It’s gotten to the point where I’m not taking care of my physical or mental health because I feel so exhausted and burnt out 24/7. I was trying to be the “best and brightest” associate at the firm for a while, but right now I feel like I’m just trying to get by. I had a sleep study done earlier this year and it showed that I’m asleep for less than 4 hours with very little REM each night. I feel very depressed and have little social life.

I contemplated changing careers to work with my one big passion, horses, but I don’t know if it would be possible to get certified in a horse-related field and start my own business while working my current job. I also have wondered if it’s smart to try to turn my relaxing passion into a new career.

Other relevant background:

• have Bachelor’s degree in a sociology-esque major
• love reading fiction, considered trying to go into editing but learned that’s a difficult field to break into
• have ADHD and take medication
• love horses, cats, and all animals
• wanted to be a veterinarian growing up but I chose not to because I am not good at math
• love arts and crafts / being creative, including painting and candle making

What careers do you think I’d be suited for?

I’m a plus size lawyer who tends to shop on a budget (i.e., many of my work clothes have been from Old Navy). As long as I look conservative/professional, nobody has ever seemed to care that I’m not wearing fancy brands. With that being said, my old go-to Old Navy isn’t making suits anymore and their collection of work-appropriate blouses gets smaller every day.

Where are other plus size lawyers buying suits and blouses? Bonus points if it’s budget-friendly, but at this point I’m prepared to shell out a little $$ for a suit that fits well.

Hi all, I’m looking for a planner similar to the one pictured below but with monthly or weekly overview pages.

I love that this planner has a breakdown for appointments, tasks, follow-ups, etc. It’s extremely helpful on the day-to-day, but would be even better if it had a monthly or weekly overview before the daily pages to make it easier to plan ahead.

Does anyone have any recommendations? Thanks in advance.

https://preview.redd.it/f3lwo1m9x6gh1.png?width=1206&format=png&auto=webp&s=57a5702b2a4dbe4ec3297ba806e1899b7e846f85

I (F 26) think I’ve messed up my life beyond repair, but I also cannot commit suicide because I have animals that depend on me. I don’t know what to do. This is going to be too long, so I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read it and give me some insight.

I spent 3 years in law school and a lot of money to become a lawyer. I enjoy the work, but the constant stress and pressure has made me feel so burnt out and exhausted. I’ve been practicing for less than two years.

Because of law school, undergraduate student loans, and some miscellaneous debt, I’m about ~$120k in debt right now. I spend so much money every month trying to pay that down. It feels crushing. I feel like I work so hard but life is so expensive that I‘m living paycheck to paycheck.

To be fair, I could live cheaper. A lot of the time I feel exhausted and I get takeout instead of cooking. I live in a big city with my boyfriend, so rent is really expensive. I also have a lot of pets, including a horse, which is not cheap to keep in the suburbs. However, my animals are the only thing that bring me joy.

I just feel so stuck in my life. I can’t quit my job because I can’t take a pay cut. I can’t afford to pay my debt and rent and bills with less money. I can’t leave the city because then my boyfriend and I will break up, even though rent would be cheaper and I’d be happier living elsewhere. I tried to look into refinancing my loans, maybe trying to lower my payments, but I can’t get a much better rate. I also have my current lease until July 2027.

I really don’t want to sell my horse. If I have to keep tolerating living, I have to keep my horse. I can’t commit suicide because I have cats and my horse depending on me to provide and take care of them.

I wish I could just restart. If I could go back in time, I wouldn’t be a fat, depressed lawyer who doesn’t have enough willpower to actually take care of herself. I know all of this is my fault, it all stems from my choices. I just don’t know how to get out.

If any of you have felt stuck, is there a way to get unstuck? I don’t know what to do anymore.

Hi all, I’ve been an associate litigator for a year and a half now. I work at a medium-sized firm (Am Law 200). My yearly performance reviews were all very positive and I know most partners enjoy working with me. But I also have ADHD and struggle with organization, and I’m just not sure I can handle the stress of this job long-term, despite the fact that I enjoy what I do generally.

Yesterday, I was fired off of one partner’s cases because I missed a deadline. My only defense is that I sent the deadline to the person who was supposed to add it to my calendar, and that person did not, but I know it’s still on me that I didn’t double check and keep this in mind. It didn’t hurt the case or client in the long-term, thankfully, but I understand why the partner fired me off his cases.

It was a big blow to my confidence after a week that was going badly. I’ve cried about work every single day this week, and to be honest, I had a panic attack yesterday after talking to the partner about my error. I haven’t had a panic attack since 1L finals season.

I just feel like I try my hardest to get ahead, I work late nights, I work weekends, but somehow there’s always something and I end up behind on everything and disappointing everyone. I’m trying my best, but at this point, I’m not sure my best is good enough.

Has anyone ever felt like this / made a mistake like this and come back from it at the same firm? Is it normal to feel this way, and is it actually going to get better? Or is this a sign that I’m not cut out for this? Other lawyers with ADHD, how did you make sure you never forgot anything or missed a deadline? I have a chart and a calendar system, but somehow this still slipped through.

I put this under the “support” flair, but please do be honest and let me know if you think this is a sign that I need to find a new career.