u/Slim_rubi

My situationship is trying again. He stayed on the phone with me like slept on the phone allllll night. He apologized nonstop and told me he loves me continuously. He calls me everyday (something I used to complain about) and stays up with me even though he’s tired. He cooks for me and feeds me.

I told him I don’t want to get my hopes up and he plays me again. The girl he played in my face for had sex with his best friend. This was months ago. I told him that I would forgive him and move on and soo far he’s more attentive and kind.

I’m talking to multiple men which I’ve never done fr. He doesn’t know that. I have 3 dates planned. I’m currently on one. I don’t like the guy fr. I thought we were friends but I guess we’re not.

Idk what to do. I reallly like him but I don’t trust him. Do I just date around until he makes me permanent? The guys I’m talking to are interested in me but haven’t planned anything fr. They know they don’t have much time with me but continue to tell me they like me. Do I just keep dating around? Or do I honestly forgive him and try with him?

Edit;
I don’t have sex with multiple men. I do other things but sex is not my bop. He’s asked me out numerous times but I always tell him No. He dates and i don’t. I haven’t had a relationship in almost 7 years. He’s older than me. I go on dates and deal with other men from time to time but I can’t get him out of my mind. He tells me he loves me and vice versa. And I mean it just not in a way where I have to be with him. The girl he dated was super jealous and played as far as pretending we were cool while dogging me to everyone. I left him alone for a year because I refused to deal with the whole situation. It’s not a matter of him wanting a situation it’s me being scared to date. I just don’t trust men. I also haven’t found anyone that I really like aside from him. So him now being so romantic and loving is questionable. If they didn’t break up would he he act like like? If she didnt f his friend would you be in my face as hard as you are now. The problem is that I forgave him and I told him that. So do I continue to keep him around and deal with other men or do I dat him and move on like I told him I was doing. I feel that I’m ready to date but idk fr. Like how does anyone know after such a big gap.

Does anyone have a beverage company? I want to make drinks and sell them but I want to make them official. A lot of people near me sell bootleggers or nutcrackers but they’re not licensed and I believe illegal. I just want some information about how to sell or where to start a legit beverage company.

The NYC pride parade is tomorrow. It’s my first time. What should I expect? Most importantly what should I wear??

I don’t have an issue with LGBT it’s when it gets to the other side that I’m left confused. I’m work in a school. I just learned about the furries and what not. I do not for the love of me understand what it has to do with sexuality or even why people are doing this.

I got spoke to today because one of the kids decided that they want to identify as a cat. They refuse to sit in the desk or answer to their name. I asked the child to take off the ears and pay attention. Out right refused!!! I send them to principal she sends them to the counselor (white trans woman). The counselor tells me that it’s important that we allow the kids to seen and that comes with allowing themselves to identify in a way they see fit. I’ve never had this happen and I’ve been working this job 3 years now.

Luckily I’m only a sub for the day but literally wtf is this world coming to.

Let’s say you serve a customer for hours. Then a coworker comes that has served the group before just as they are paying the bill. They give you cash and ask that the tip goes to your coworker that just clocked in and hasn’t taken any tables. The customer has a crush on the coworker and wants to give her the tip instead.

What would you do?

There is too much negativity going on in the world . My algorithm is constantly filled with inspirational cheating videos, Baddies and fighting and low quality podcast. What are some low intensity content that you recommend. It can be educational as well.

I usually watch movies and mysteries during my down time but lately it’s been too depressing.

I can watch vlogs, storytimes, educational content or anything that doesn’t require too much energy. I’ll even watch your videos as long as they’re interesting lol😝

Crying screaming and arguing makes me despise the people I love or like. It’s hard for me to date because it seems that men whether deemed good or toxic want to see the bad side of me. Whenever I meet people friends or guys there’s always this idea of “I want to see you mad”. I’m a small girl with a gentle voice that tends to try to be positive as much as possible. Being mad and acting out makes me feel bad about myself.

I’ve been in a situationship for years. My choice because I don’t want to date him but I used to enjoy our time with each other. He wanted to date I didn’t want too. We used to have small differences and we would kiss and move on. Last year I started showing real emotions because he handled me wrong. I realized that he enjoys setting women off because it makes him feel loved I guess. My gentleness isn’t enough. I no longer feel the way I did because of this.
In fact he started dating a Latina girl that would fight him and argue with him in the club in front of everybody. She was always crying, always complaining. It turned me off badddd.

I’ve watched women date and they would yell and scream to and about the man while he took it. It soo toxic and abusive but the men love where they are.

I was dealing with a man who is completely different from what im attracted to but he takes care of me and tries to do things that I like. Well, he said the words “I want to see you mad”. Well he got me there. I yelled I cried and I screamed. Even though he apologized and tried to fix it I couldn’t stand him anymore.

I have a friend that argues with this guy nonstop. They call each other names and she acts like a big ass brat. She said “men love being spoken to rough.” I hate it like genuinely despise it. It seems that toxic is the new normal. Being dragged out the spot in front of people, being screamed at and constantly in a state of anxiety. I don’t want to be the crazy girlfriend or the toxic couple. I want to be able to tell my children how kind their father was and how infatuated we have always been with each other.

I haven’t had a bf in years because of how toxic and anxiety ridden it was. Even while dating around it’s always this idea of “will you fight for me” or “what hell can I put you through so I know you care”. I just want to give love and be loved. Of course couples fight occasionally but we should be able to move on like normal. No witnesses no questioning of if this person will really hurt me. Not to mention having to pretend to care about stuff you really don’t.

I want to start dating again but if this is the reality I don’t think it’s for me.

Does anyone want to meet up for Juneteenth? I was planning to stop by Von king and prospect park after. Any bk girlies wanna meet?

I’m in dire need of a good cake shop near city hall asap. Please help me out

I started a small business in 2020 using Wix. I didn’t have much funding and worked mostly through in person sales. The wix payment I used was through PayPal because I didn’t set up the credit portion. I also sell adult toys mainly and was afraid of being shut down. I stopped the business in 2022 due to personal and familial situations. I made a decent amount and inspired a few people. It’s 2026 and I’m ready to restart. Would you recommend Shopify as means to dropship or start a website from scratch? I don’t have much room to keep inventory. I would like to sell self defense items also which could be an issue with specific sites. What route would you go?

I was asked on a double date by my “friend”. She told me he had cute friends and he wanted to go to this restaurant I used to work at. So I agreed.

We get there and her guy is cute and cool. My guy looks like Sid. He’s not my type at all. He’s not her type either. Neither of them were my type because they are young hood dudes. But I planned to take one for the team.

I’m trying to be kind and personable even though I’m not interested. I’m asking questions , keeping the conversation going etc. Then he starts flirting with me. Talking mostly about my body and how cute I am. I got the ick. I told them I’m gonna order a hookah and went over there to get one. I spoke to some people I know. (Men from the old bar) and took a shot. I also ordered a Shirley temple.

When I got back to the table my guy said “ you over there talking to guys, what we doing?” I said “I used to work here so I know them.” He says “oh cus I’m feeling you and I don’t want my girl talking to other dudes”. ☹️

I don’t drink margaritas so I order a Shirley temple. The group orders marg flights and tacos. I don’t eat tacos. The hookah comes and as I’m reaching in my purse to grab the money, the men say loudly “that’s hers we didn’t order that”. The guy (my boss) puts it down and I pass him the money. SUPER EMBARRASING.

ATP I’m over it. My battery drained. I started taking videos on my phone. Giving cold responses and left the table a few times.
They eventually asked for the check 112$. Her man says “I’m sending you 67$”. And she says okay and pays the rest. He also argues about my $5 Shirley temple that I got at the bar earlier. 🙄

As we’re leaving, I go to the mirror to take pictures. My guy jumps in the picture “babe let’s take a flick.” I move the camera.

So later on they text my “friend” complaining about my attitude and how rude I was. Saying “My man was feeling her at first but she rude and she talking to other guys in his face”.

So my “friend” feels away and is lowkey holding it against me but idc. I feel like she purposely put me on the date with a guy like that because she thinks low of me. I could be dragging it but why are you trying to put me together with someone you wouldn’t even look at?

I don’t like talking to men my age or younger. I think they’re scary.

I went out with a guy a few years back. When we went to the store a man asked if we could buy him a bag of chips. I asked him which ones he wanted. He proceeded to try to tell me what he wanted all while the guy I was with kept saying “No no, stop talking to him” like he was scared. Then made the guy feel uncomfortable for asking. I’ve bought food for people that were homeless or on the streets before. It’s not that serious and we were already going in the store. It turned me off so bad. He then tells me that I need to stop being nice. I never saw him again. He was 3 years younger at the time.

I hang out with this kid he’s a year under me. Every time we are outside and we pass a man or homeless person he’s crossing over each side of me so I’m not walking beside them. It annoys me because I’m not a damsel and it’s performative like something he learned. This is the same kid that can’t send back food because of anxiety and is constantly running behind me when someone he’s uncomfortable with walks into a room. Legit scary vibes.

It seems like men that are my age or younger are trying to be seen as macho or protective men but they come off as very weak and scary and it turns me off big time. I’ve been in similar situations with men 30+ and the protective instinct is more natural and noninvasive. They don’t seem as fearful of the world as men my age. I’m thinking it’s a Gen Z thing.

Is it just me?

Anything fun happening today? It’s supposed to rain all weekend I need something to do now

I graduate next week and I’m going to have a lot more free time. I am a member of the UFT and I know they have fun events but it’s usually an older crowd. I also learned to play chess this year. I’m in my late 20’s but I want to find something that I can do to get out and maybe even feel accomplished or something. But I don’t want it to feel like work or be expected. I’m interested in health and wellness but open to learning new things in general.
So far I have :
Join a chess club
Sew or crotchet club
Run club
Anime Club
Become a Yoga instructor
Volunteer at a community center
Bowling club

What are some hobbies or activities that you added to your life that made you feel happy or accomplished? Or just for the free time?

I don’t even know how to preface this. I’m sure that I’m on one of the spectrums even though I’m not tested.

Growing up I knew I was pretty but I was depressed and didn’t really take care of myself plus my family wasn’t very kind or supportive. I was often just miserable, quiet and standoffish. I started reading and stayed in a book. I didn’t make friends, they made me. I’m now learning social cues in my 20’s.

I was friends with a boy since elementary school and he stopped being friends with me in 11th grade because his gf felt like I was a “hoe” who flirted with him. Mind you I only saw him between one class break or lunch. Then I visited for college and he tried to have sex with me. I was shooketh. A short explanation of the relationships I’ve had with men and women.

Now the point, literally two weeks ago I was speaking to my sister about my boss who reminds me of a dad and is very generous. We go out to eat for special events like my bday or we’ll buy each other goodies during work. Nothing crazy just a donut or drink. He always asks me about school , my plans and we just have a good rapport. I’ve been working with him around 4 years. He reminds me of an old tv dad. Before dinner he told me I look nice. I didn’t think anything because it’s my bday and I put on a dress shirt. Well this time during dinner I was telling him about my plans post degree. We started speaking about conferences out of town and he asked if I would go to one with him. I said yes I would like to see what he does and shadow him. He said “your boyfriend won’t be mad” my entire world fell. Ive heard that phrase before and it has zero good intent. He continues by asking if there’s anyone that will pew pew him because he travels with me. He has a wife and kids. I’m so disappointed and I now realize I’ll have to leave this job when I wanted to go full time.

I’m tired of thinking I’ve made genuine connections for them to be fake. I would love to be able to show appreciation and receive, and let it be that.

I rent a room in the city. It’s not that big but I think I have enough room to add a pole so I can add to my stream. Will the pole go against renting standards? Do they leave damage? This would be my first time owning a pole. Is it worth the trouble?

I’m in search of a place that has low lights, plays live jazz and makes good martinis with decent food. Preferably in Brooklyn but willing to go towards lower Manhattan

I’ve stopped making friends. I’ve had some very decent friendships within my lifetime but uncomfortable experiences have made it difficult to maintain or want to maintain them. I noticed in particular when men get involved the dynamic changes. I think women naturally admire or “idolize” other women but it can eventually turn into resentment. I get told that I’m stuck up and intimidating by the same people that stay pretending to be cool with me. I think I’m too much of a pushover. I also get told that I’m too nice so it seems fake. And men tell me that I’m very nonchalant and “do what I want” and that i think like a boy. So maybe there’s something I’m not seeing.

I grew up in a house full of women as the youngest. I’ve dealt with mean girl antics, fights and disagreements. However my mother never raised us to fight over men, feel jealous towards others or compete for anything other than sports or awards. I notice these are points of interest that individuals use to bond, however I’m not a fan. For example: I will not stop being friends with someone because my friend just doesn’t like them. I’m not territorial at all. And I question a man’s antics before women.

However the trust that I’ve had in women have lead to me being set up by a girl I’ve known since middle school because her bf of 1 yr “wanted me”. She also found herself trying to fight me and saying “I’m not shaped like her and you know that” when they started arguing about it. So I guess jealousy.

I’ve attempted to be cool with girls at work but after hearing them trash talk each other and back door one another I stopped dealing with them. They started doing it to me. So I ignore them now. And when new girls come they tell them not to deal with me because I can’t be trusted. 😂 lol

I’ve constantly defended women against men. As far as men talking bad about them or disrespecting them only for them to turn around start disrespecting me and then playing victim when confronted. Or put me in dangerous positions behind men. Accusing me of flirting which caused women to try to fight me or send men to harass me based on lies.

I was friends with a girl that has tried to have sex with every guy I talked to. The latest being a guy she knew I was in love with. I even took her to thanksgiving at my family’s house. That hurts.

I fell out with my most recent friend because she doesn’t take accountability (a trend that I’ve seen in women, “playing victim”). Most importantly she lets the old guys that she deals with talk about me and then tells me what they say. “He said he would never deal with you because you’re too skinny or you look young” She would constantly speak about my body, my womanhood and my lifestyle. I never said anything. The one time I spoke with her about the men she dates she got offended. Mind you she’s spoken about my guy a lot. When she brung it up she started talking about an event that we’ve discussed about a 1000 times. That mind you she also got her info from a man. She let that man tell her how I felt instead of just asking. And continued to internalize my feelings based off him. She used the word “competition” and that was my last straw. I haven’t spoken to her since.

All in all it feels like too much to care about and when you express yourself and it goes against there feelings the energy shifts. It always feels like I’m walking on eggshells as opposed to being cool with men or studs. I also feel like there is too much attention on lifestyle or others perception. I no longer feel safe when dealing with women in close proximity as far as friendships and would rather just be surface level. We can hangout in open spaces but I don’t want to meet your family or friends.

There’s that whole saying “don’t trust women that don’t have friends” but I genuinely think that’s going to be me for a while.

Can anyone relate?

I just wrote an email to the department head complaining about my professor, what’s next?

I can’t get through to Medicaid. I haven’t been able to pick up my meds in weeks. I was told I need to turn in a termination letter from my primary insurance because my Medicaid is being blocked. I’ve been on hold for hours and then disconnected. Does anyone know where to send the email for termination?