hey :)
i’ve visited naples from nyc a couple of times and love it. each time i’ve stayed around the historic center. but for my next trip i want to stay for a longer stretch of time and be in either chiaia or vomero.
can you help me choose between those two neighborhoods? how they are similar / different would be helpful. looking to go around january if that matters.
hey,
my partner and i have been going through infertility for a couple of years now. in that time, friends have gotten pregnant etc and i’ve struggled with having to distance myself. i personally would like to be a present friend, but it’s hard on my partner.
i can go by myself and occasionally do, but even this is difficult for a couple reasons: one is that my partner doesn’t want to tell people about our situation. so at a certain point i run out of reasons why i am showing up alone. the other is that if i say “hey im going to meet up with [insert friend with kid] for a walk” it triggers my partner.
we live in a major city and i am very social person. having to isolate and not be enthusiastic and present for friends has been difficult. but all of that was magnified when my sister got pregnant. my partner and my sister weren’t super close, but i was (and still am) shocked by the level of distance needed to maintain my partner’s peace.
my sister named me the godfather and i want to be a great uncle. i love to host. i love christmas with the family. but the reality is i have to significantly tamper all of that enthusiasm to protect my partner’s peace.
i honestly don’t know how to do this effectively. i feel like i haven’t been myself for years now. i know my partner needs to be the priority, but the way we are processing this and want to move through the world feels very different.
can anyone relate and provide some advice on how to navigate ?
hey :)
i was bummed to find out cafe gitane closed. but i once tried to open a cocktail bar at 14 jay st. unfortunately, two trees made the terms ridiculous, so now it sits as a small furniture showroom.
figure the spot where cafe gitane was might make for a nice spot to re-try making a truly local cocktail bar for the neighborhood. i do worry about the lack of foot traffic and the fact it seems cafe gitane couldn’t make their rent. but if anyone happens to know who to get in touch with about the space (ie who owns / leases the building) that would be appreciated !
hey,
my partner has a severe diagnosis that has made our infertility journey long and difficult. i know many of you here can relate.
what i need some advice on in this: i am a very social person. i love hosting. my family isn’t far away. my younger sister recently had her first child and i was asked to be the godfather. my partner has little interest and has been upfront about her boundaries.
it’s honestly been nearly impossible for me to navigate this situation. i love my nephew. he’s the first one of the next generation. but the couple times we’ve been in the same room all together, i’ve hesitated to even pick my him up because i know it will trigger my partner.
it’s been almost a year and i want to have my family
over and play my nephew his first beatles record, sing him wheels on the bus on guitar, and just be a loving uncle. but i know these things are hard for my partner and honestly i know there will be blowback if she thinks i am not prioritizing her feelings (again fair enough).
has anyone been me in this situation ? what do you do ? (PS i think my partner needs to go to therapy but i can’t force it).
hey all,
my partner of a decade was diagnosed with unexplained infertility a few years ago. since then, there’s been all of the emotional and financial struggles one would expect. but the strangest and most difficult to deal with for me has been the boundaries my wife needs. she really does not have any interest in friends or family that have babies. i’ve seen her grow distant from friends and family, especially because she does not feel comfortable discussing her infertility with most people.
the most devastating for me has been my sister. they never had the strongest relationship, but since my sister fell pregnant and had my nephew, it’s been truly awful. i let my sister know behind the scenes that we are struggling, but at the end of the day, i love being an uncle and don’t see how refusing to visit my nephew or host them makes anything better.
my partner knows this situation is hurting me, but thinks essentially i just need to man up, because what she is dealing with is worse. any advocacy for things to be different gets interpreted as me prioritizing my sister or my needs above her and her mental health.
i’m worried it’s a compatibility issue. how can i have a life filled with positive relationships with family and friends while simultaneously respecting my wife’s boundaries?
hey all,
my partner of a decade was diagnosed with unexplained infertility a few years ago. since then, there’s been all of the emotional and financial struggles one would expect. but the strangest and most difficult to deal with for me has been the boundaries my wife needs. she really does not have any interest in friends or family that have babies. i’ve seen her grow distant from friends and family, especially because she does not feel comfortable discussing her infertility with most people.
the most devastating for me has been my sister. they never had the strongest relationship, but since my sister fell pregnant and had my nephew, it’s been truly awful. i let my sister know behind the scenes that we are struggling, but at the end of the day, i love being an uncle and don’t see how refusing to visit my nephew or host them makes anything better.
my partner knows this situation is hurting me, but thinks essentially i just need to man up, because what she is dealing with is worse. any advocacy for things to be different gets interpreted as me prioritizing my sister or my needs above her and her mental health.
i’m worried it’s a compatibility issue. i wouldn’t treat a friend this way, let alone one of her core family members. i am aware it’s not a totally abnormal reaction, to need the space. if anyone reading has been the partner struggling with this aspect
of infertility, would love to hear your thoughts & advice.
thank you