u/SpaceCofffeee

Ich bin jetzt seit Jahren auf Hormontherapie ohne Probleme, und seit Mai haben die Probleme das die Kasse Medikamente erst weiter übernehmen sobald die die Notwendigkeit bestätigen können. Das ganze Wirtschaftlichkeits Kram. Ich war da jetzt Monate am Terror Machen und habe alles Geschickt was die wollen. (Immer höflich und professionell geblieben), heute beim Telefonat kam raus das die schon längst eine Zusage geschickt haben die nie ankam. Ich könnte schreien. Ich musste jetzt schon über 80€ für Private Rezepte bezahlen um nicht gegen meinen Willen ohne Medikamente zu sein und war kurz davor mir wieder welche auf eigene Kosten besorgen zu müssen. Ich weiß das ist nicht viel aber ich bin gerade zwischen Jobs und das hat echt noch einmal reingedrückt da ich gerade eh komplett von meinen Ersparten lebe bis irgendwann einmal eine Rückzahlung von Arbeitslosen Geld kommt. Ich will echt wieder Arbeit finden bin aber komplett burned out... 40Stunden Woche (Mehr 45mit Überstunden +Hin und Rückfahrt) den ganzen Tag arbeiten und am Ende keine Energie für irgendwas zu haben, und zu einer leeren Wohnung ohne sozial Leben nach Hause zu kommen packe ich momentan nicht mehr.

I just feel close to giving up on life. I moved to a new place back in February and basically lost most of my friends then. It just isn't really possible to stay in contact when you can't see each other in person. It feels nearly impossible to make friends as an adult, I try to keep a few online friendships alive but it's just hard. I miss hanging out with people. And my love life isn't better... My last big relationship didn't work out and I'm trying to find life again and it just feels impossible... Dating seriously sucks. It's now been months since I had even a hug and I'm just feeling hopeless...

I feel hella weird and stupid rn. Basically I 22F sub got into talking with a really sweet 28F Dom on a dating site. She basically messaged me and told me that we match a lot in what we are looking for in a relationship/dynamic and we got talking about our preferences, hobbys, limits, etc. And I was a little openly flirtatious. Then she asked me if we wanted to meet wich I interpreted as a date! And was vocal about it. I didn't call it a date but I was open about having a little panic and being excited... It was seriously nice, but I felt a little weird because most of my tries to compliment and to flirt kinda got no reaction from her, I found that absolutely oki and honestly thought was just how she is. At the end and during talking today she communicated that this was more of just a meetup for her and she isn't even fully shure if she wants me or is ready for a dynamic at the moment and I feel just kinda overwhelmed, sad and confused. It's seriously worth mentioning that we both are a little on the spectrum and are not completely typical...

I don't really know how to handle this emotionaly. This was the first time in months that I actually went on a "date".