u/Sunnyflbunny

a tentative step toward the shore,
to watch if the tide is safe.
my heart is still tucked away,
resting quiet in the shade,
while i hold a careful breath.

but the glow dissolves into absence...
leaving only shallow words.
after a moment so close, so softly undone,
this sudden distance leaves me cold.

a ripple stirs the water,
a silent promise of the deep.
leaning close to the current,
while warmth slips through my fingertips.

now the dusk falls quiet.
my heart is open
where the shore gives way.
left uncovered,

hoping the deep
will rise up to meet me,
where the shade ends
and the water begins.

a tentative step toward the shore,
to watch if the tide is safe.
my heart is still tucked away,
resting quiet in the shade,
while i hold a careful breath.

but the glow dissolves into absence...
leaving only shallow words.
after a moment so close, so softly undone,
this sudden distance leaves me cold.

a ripple stirs the water,
a silent promise of the deep.
leaning close to the current,
while warmth slips through my fingertips.

now the dusk falls quiet.
my heart is open
where the shore gives way.
left uncovered,

hoping the deep
will rise up to meet me,
where the shade ends
and the water begins.

tonight... i am letting go of my hesitations for tonight.
i feel the warmth of your love
beneath a moon that burns so bright,
and i just want to lay here
with everything i feel for you.

your words wrap around me like a warm blanket,
folding into a quiet calm
under this night sky where i can finally breathe
finding the pieces we thought we lost.

in the stillness,
as the rest of the world completely fades away,
your voice slips straight through
to those cautious walls
that slowly soften to your tenderness...
lowering just for you,
as you soothe my racing heart,

oh, how i’ve missed you.

tonight... i am letting go of my hesitations for tonight.
i feel the warmth of your love
beneath a moon that burns so bright,
and i just want to lay here
with everything i feel for you.

your words wrap around me like a warm blanket,
folding into a quiet calm
under this night sky where i can finally breathe
finding the pieces we thought we lost.

in the stillness,
as the rest of the world completely fades away,
your voice slips straight through
to those cautious walls
that slowly soften to your tenderness...
lowering just for you,
as you soothe my racing heart,

oh, how i’ve missed you.

If tomorrow comes and my screen stays black,
And the world keeps moving, no turning back,
Would you notice the quiet? The sudden lack?
Or would I just slip through the cracks?
•
I know the closest ones would feel the tear,
They’d carry the weight of me not being there.
But what about the spaces where we connect?
The midnight talks, the unexpected effect?
If my voice isn’t there to anchor the night,
Would the room feel a little less bright?
•
Down here in the heavy, humid Florida heat,
Where the fan just spins and the crickets repeat,
I sit with this wonder, just letting it flow,
How long would it take for the static to show?
Would you actually miss the soul behind the text,
Or just log on and move to the next?
•
It’s just an honest wonder, letting it flow,
A quiet heart needing to know,
Beyond the surface and the things that we send,
Did I leave an impression that stays in the end?

If tomorrow comes and my screen stays black,
And the world keeps moving, no turning back,
Would you notice the quiet? The sudden lack?
Or would I just slip through the cracks?
•
I know the closest ones would feel the tear,
They’d carry the weight of me not being there.
But what about the spaces where we connect?
The midnight talks, the unexpected effect?
If my voice isn’t there to anchor the night,
Would the room feel a little less bright?
•
Down here in the heavy, humid Florida heat,
Where the fan just spins and the crickets repeat,
I sit with this wonder, just letting it flow,
How long would it take for the static to show?
Would you actually miss the soul behind the text,
Or just log on and move to the next?
•
It’s just an honest wonder, letting it flow,
A quiet heart needing to know,
Beyond the surface and the things that we send,
Did I leave an impression that stays in the end?

i want you to see what i saw
before my eyes ever found your face,
i was already pulled toward the gravity of your voice.
that quiet, unhurried cadence,
the cool-headed grace
that gently occupied the room.
you were an unspoken captivation,
long before an image could define you,
my mind was already answering to yours.
 
i loved you.
i know i built walls,
i know i was slow to open up,
but do not confuse caution for a lack of love.
what i gave you was entirely true,
a deep, quiet kind of devotion,
steady and real.
what we shared left its trace.
 
god, how i craved the truth of you.
i wanted to reach past the surface of who you are,
to understand the quiet way you move,
and accept every single piece of what i found.
i wanted a closeness that left no room for doubt.
i wanted nothing in this world more.
 
i always saw the highest version of you.
an unforgettable brilliance in who you are,
a light so distinct
it could never be ordinary.
 
our paths are untangling naturally,
leaving only a peaceful silence behind.
i am completely at ease,
grateful for the rare gift it was to love you,
and to hold that space together
for the brief moment it was ours.
 
i regret nothing of what i gave.
even from this distance,
i am simply glad that we met.

I began as an open canvas,
just a pristine charcoal line,
a portrait waiting for colors,
soft and bright and fine.
·
I was a little girl
with pockets full of wonder and of grace,
looking for friends in every crowd,
and love in every face.
·
the world outside was a gentle thing,
an invitation wide,
but the shadows grew heavy, cold, and sharp
the moment I stepped inside.
·
in the place that should have taught me flight,
I was told to leave no trace,
to dim my voice, to still my breath,
to take up zero space.
·
controlled, diminished, guarded tight,
and broken down by design
by the very hands that held the keys
to mold this life of mine.
·
abuse became a familiar ghost,
a daily, haunting guest,
whispering that I was wrong,
leaving a weight inside my chest.
·
I learned the art of shrinking down,
of blending with the wall,
just a shadow in the background
to survive it all.
·
but a canvas cannot be destroyed
by the darkness of the stroke,
and the quiet girl learned to breathe
underneath the heavy things they spoke.
·
piece by piece,
I’ve pulled together the woman that you see,
with a sharper vision in my eyes,
resurrecting me.
·
I see the beauty in the storm,
the grace within the scars,
the empathy that maps the space
between the distant stars.
·
it taught me how to read the pain
in someone else’s eyes,
to know we do not walk alone
beneath these heavy skies.
·
no, not everyone is granted
a storybook start to see,
but I am fighting like hell
for the beautiful middle of me.
·
I am cautious now, and guarded,
protective of my peace,
holding tight the brush and palette,
finding my release.
·
but if you are true and steady,
if you take the time to see,
I will trust your hands to hold the brush,
and let you paint with me.
·
the ending is unwritten yet,
the future still unseen,
but I am pouring all my love
into the space between.
·
each drop that they withheld from me,
I pour back in tonight.
I am the artist of my life,
and I choose to paint the light.

I began as an open canvas,  
just a pristine charcoal line,  
a portrait waiting for colors,  
soft and bright and fine.  
·  
I was a little girl   
with pockets full of wonder and of grace,  
looking for friends in every crowd,  
and love in every face.  
·  
the world outside was a gentle thing,  
an invitation wide,  
but the shadows grew heavy, cold, and sharp  
the moment I stepped inside.  
·  
in the place that should have taught me flight,  
I was told to leave no trace,  
to dim my voice, to still my breath,  
to take up zero space.  
·  
controlled, diminished, guarded tight,  
and broken down by design  
by the very hands that held the keys  
to mold this life of mine.  
·  
abuse became a familiar ghost,  
a daily, haunting guest,  
whispering that I was wrong,  
leaving a weight inside my chest.  
·  
I learned the art of shrinking down,  
of blending with the wall,  
just a shadow in the background  
to survive it all.  
·  
but a canvas cannot be destroyed  
by the darkness of the stroke,  
and the quiet girl learned to breathe  
underneath the heavy things they spoke.  
·  
piece by piece,   
I’ve pulled together the woman that you see,  
with a sharper vision in my eyes,  
resurrecting me.  
·  
I see the beauty in the storm,  
the grace within the scars,  
the empathy that maps the space  
between the distant stars.  
·  
it taught me how to read the pain  
in someone else’s eyes,  
to know we do not walk alone  
beneath these heavy skies.  
·  
no, not everyone is granted  
a storybook start to see,  
but I am fighting like hell  
for the beautiful middle of me.  
·  
I am cautious now, and guarded,  
protective of my peace,  
holding tight the brush and palette,  
finding my release.  
·  
but if you are true and steady,  
if you take the time to see,  
I will trust your hands to hold the brush,  
and let you paint with me.  
·  
the ending is unwritten yet,  
the future still unseen,  
but I am pouring all my love  
into the space between.  
·  
each drop that they withheld from me,  
I pour back in tonight.  
I am the artist of my life,  
and I choose to paint the light.

You are standing there in the sudden silence.
Your heart remains wide open, aching under the immense weight
of a grand love that no longer has anywhere to land.
They want to call this sorrow.
They want to give it a cold, clinical name, so they can neatly tuck it away.
.
But don't call it a void. It is far from an empty space.
It is all that beautiful, stubborn devotion you spent years gathering,
a sacred fire suddenly left with nowhere to burn,
because you had to let go of their hand.
.
And now you are left holding all of it.
Every single, devastating ounce of it.
It does not simply vanish, and it does not stop,
just because they're no longer there to meet you in its light,
leaving you to carry it down into the depths.
It lingers right here, tracing the very air around you,
gentle, devastating, and absolutely refusing to die.
.
So let it ache.
Let it pull so tightly against your chest that it steals your breath away.
Do not fear the vastness left behind.
This pain is only love with nowhere else to go.
And if you have to carry this weight alone, you will,
because it belongs to you.
Your soul built it, and you are strong enough to hold it.

You build entire universes
Out of text.
Wrapping me in sentences
So beautiful they ache,
Leaving me breathless
Under the weight of your words.
But every time the echo dies down,
My hands are still empty.

You are a master of the beautiful near-miss.
The charming soul
Who stays safely behind the glass.
I loved you enough to believe
Every grand declaration.
I never wanted to ask
If your horizon simply ends
Where the real world begins.

You gave me everything, except your presence.
You gave me forever, except tomorrow.

And god, I would've stayed for so long.
Tending a fire that had no wood,
Forgiving the empty space
Because the dream of you was so warm.
The man I thought I saw in your poetry-
The one who knew exactly how to reach into my defenses-
Had me completely, helplessly hooked.

I know it is just air.
I know you are a masterpiece made of nothing.
I stepped back,
But I left the doorway open,
Hoping you would finally cross the distance
To find me.

But the space between us never moved,
No matter how beautifully the words fell.
I still yearn for the man I thought I saw.
But I cannot keep trying to warm myself
With words alone.

So, quietly,
I am closing the door.

You are a sudden, brilliant flash of light in a room I have kept perfectly dark for a very long time. You are entirely open with your life, so beautifully free, and so honest about wanting me. We think so deeply it aches, and there is a quiet gravity between us that pulls constantly, shifting everything around us without making a single sound. But looking at us, our worlds are built so differently. Your life is a vibrant garden, filled with people who love you and lift you up.

And mine is an isolated fortress.

I live behind walls built entirely out of survival. My history has shown me, over and over again, that it is simply never safe to let go. Others have tried to reach me before, only to prove that it wasn't worth opening up. So I hold my breath, guarding the remaining pieces of myself in the quiet.

But oh god, I want to find you. I want to unlock the door if it is truly you. Because if you are the one, I know exactly how I love. I will fall completely. I will plunge into the deep, and no one else in the universe will exist for me.

But my trust is earned in inches. I move with the heavy caution of the wounded, and I will never rush into something this important.

You tell me your arms are wide open. You tell me to fall and that you will catch me, to trust that I'll be safe with you. You want me near you always, filling the silence with every loving name. It feels so effortlessly right, and that is exactly what paralyzes me. I am terrified to choose wrong. I am so afraid of finally letting myself believe it’s you, only to find myself standing alone in the wreckage when the illusion breaks. But then I ask myself: how else am I supposed to know if I never try?

Is it you? Or is this just my fear finding another excuse to keep the doors locked?

I am going to take my time.

I will never rush this.

But if it’s you... god, if it’s actually you, I just hope you are patient enough to wait for me.

You build entire universes
Out of text.
Wrapping me in sentences
So beautiful they ache,
Leaving me breathless
Under the weight of your words.
But every time the echo dies down,
My hands are still empty.

You are a master of the beautiful near-miss.
The charming soul
Who stays safely behind the glass.
I loved you enough to believe
Every grand declaration.
I never wanted to ask
If your horizon simply ends
Where the real world begins.

You gave me everything, except your presence.
You gave me forever, except tomorrow.

And god, I would've stayed for so long.
Tending a fire that had no wood,
Forgiving the empty space
Because the dream of you was so warm.
The man I thought I saw in your poetry-
The one who knew exactly how to reach into my defenses-
Had me completely, helplessly hooked.

I know it is just air.
I know you are a masterpiece made of nothing.
I stepped back,
But I left the doorway open,
Hoping you would finally cross the distance
To find me.

But the space between us never moved,
No matter how beautifully the words fell.
I still yearn for the man I thought I saw.
But I cannot keep trying to warm myself
With words alone.

So, quietly,
I am closing the door.

You’ll never know how close you came to having all of me.

I’m sitting here in the dark tonight, just letting the sadness of missing you wash over me. I’m so tired of running from it, tired of pretending my breath doesn't catch every time your name crosses my mind. You shook my world, effortlessly. There is still a part of me that just wants to give in, drop every single guard, and lose myself in you. You have no idea how badly I wanted to stay.

But you’ll never know.

I remember the first time I saw you. The first words I spoke to you, and the first time you responded. I remember those minutes sliver of time in my life, where you came and went and I never thought I'd see you again.

Or did I even think it? Maybe I knew it. Maybe it never even crossed my mind. Maybe you were one of a thousand people I'd have contact with on a daily basis without thinking twice. Maybe those minutes were all we were supposed to have. Maybe you were never supposed to find your way back.

Maybe you were.

Maybe you are.

I remember the crush.

I remember the innocent flirting, followed by expectations of absolutely nothing.

I remember being nervous. I remember being scared.

I remember being anxious, wanting to talk to you again, and knowing I wouldn't regret it.

I remember the first time we spoke. Time seemed to stop.

And I knew this was different.

I remember when I knew. When I knew I should say it. When I held it back. When I waited.

And I told you that I loved you.

That I love you.

And I love you.

And I do remember.

I remember the first time I saw you. The first words I spoke to you, and the first time you responded. I remember those minutes sliver of time in my life, where you came and went and I never thought I'd see you again.

Or did I even think it? Maybe I knew it. Maybe it never even crossed my mind. Maybe you were one of a thousand people I'd have contact with on a daily basis without thinking twice. Maybe those minutes were all we were supposed to have. Maybe you were never supposed to find your way back.

Maybe you were.

Maybe you are.

I remember the crush.

I remember the innocent flirting, followed by expectations of absolutely nothing.

I remember being nervous. I remember being scared.

I remember being anxious, wanting to talk to you again, and knowing I wouldn't regret it.

I remember the first time we spoke. Time seemed to stop.

And I knew this was different.

I remember when I knew. When I knew I should say it. When I held it back. When I waited.

And I told you that I loved you.

That I love you.

And I love you.

And I do remember.

Con una mano me llamas
y con la otra me alejas;
con una mirada evades mi amor
y con otra me lo acercas.

Te vistes de crudo invierno
cuando te busco abrigar,
pero enciendes una hoguera
si me ves marchar.

No sé si soy tu refugio
o un pasatiempo en tu espera,
que me condenas al frío
y luego me haces primavera.

Pero tu juego se acaba
y hoy elijo la distancia;
mi fuego ya no te busca,
me quedo con mi constancia.

Prefiero quedarme en frío
lejos de tu indecisión,
que seguir quemando el alma
por salvar tu corazón.

It's what got us through yesterday, today, and what will get us through tomorrow. It's the reason people fight for theirs. The reason people struggle. And the reason they keep going. It's why you and I hold on so tight. Not to each other, but to faith that if we hold on to each other, we'll never have to let go again. It's why people give up, only to try even harder the next time around. And why I grasp to "you never know", because you never really do.

It's the substance that holds people's entire lives together by a single thread. It's what you, at your wits' end, pray for at night on your knees, on the corner of your bed. It's what she has when she's about to walk out on her entire life, not knowing where to start to build a new one.

They were consumed with it, standing on the altar, ready to give their souls to each other for the rest of their lives. Not even thinking of the consequences of "what if"? They lay at night in their beds, it spread between them, whispering that love would light the way.

It's why he wakes up every morning to a life he does not want to lead, yet leads it anyway. The anticipation that tomorrow he'll wake up again and the world will be his to hold. The dim light in his otherwise pitch black soul, telling him that he can make it just one more day. It smiles while life as a whole is frowning.

And finally, she inhales it while sitting on a bench, wiggling her toes in the grass and packing sand into a glass jar simply labeled "sanity", looking out across the expanse of the Atlantic.

It's hope.