u/TheRealFilmGeek

CMV: Reddit is one of the worst places to ask for relationship advice.

Not because people on Reddit are evil, unintelligent, or incapable of empathy. But because the structure of Reddit itself makes objective, balanced relationship advice almost impossible.

Most relationship posts are:
- written in moments of emotional intensity,
- heavily one-sided,
- missing years of context,
- and filtered through the poster’s own biases.

Then thousands of strangers project their own experiences, traumas, insecurities, values, and unresolved resentment onto the situation.

As a result, the advice often becomes:
- “break up,”
- “they’re manipulating you,”
- “this is abuse,”
- “they’re cheating,”
- “you deserve better,”
- or armchair diagnoses from people who know neither person involved.

And the scary part is: sometimes those comments are technically understandable from the information provided. But the information provided is almost never enough to make life-altering decisions with confidence.

I also think Reddit fundamentally misunderstands what long-term relationships actually look like.

If you read enough threads, you start to believe that:
- occasional boredom means the relationship is dead,
- attraction fluctuating means you’ve “fallen out of love,”
- conflict means incompatibility,
- doubts mean you should leave,
- routine means you’re settling,
- and emotional distance during stressful periods means the relationship is doomed.

But almost every long-term couple experiences some version of these things at some point.

Relationships are not static emotional highs. People change. Desire fluctuates. Stress affects intimacy. Resentment builds and can sometimes be repaired. Communication gets worse and then improves again. That’s normal.

Reddit often treats normal relational struggles and truly irreparable relationships as if they’re the same thing.

I think people are far better off:
- speaking to a therapist,
- talking to emotionally mature friends who have no stake in the outcome,
- or having difficult direct conversations with their partner.

And honestly, I’m even cautious about relying too heavily on parents or family for relationship advice, because they usually cannot be fully objective either. They love you first. If your partner hurts you, even temporarily, your family may carry that resentment long after you’ve moved on from it.

A therapist is not automatically “right,” either. But at least therapy is structured around nuance, patterns, accountability, communication, and context — not farming engagement through outrage and certainty.

To be clear: Reddit can absolutely help people recognize genuinely abusive situations, manipulation, coercion, chronic disrespect, or toxic dynamics they’ve normalized. It can also make people feel less alone.

But I think Reddit is much better at validating feelings than evaluating relationships.

CMV.

Or the latest creative cloud?

I’m not expecting anything close to a senior position, but what is the best way to get my foot in the door.

I really want to be reading and analyzing scripts, helping out in writer’s rooms etc.

I know it seems like such a broad question, but any direction would be amazing.

I’ve already collated 150 email addresses from production houses and sent them out last year as individualized emails.

TL;DR:
Persistent diarrhea, urgency, mucus/wet farts and gas for a while now. No blood, major pain or weight loss. Imodium helps temporarily. Had severe food poisoning last year from raw chicken that sent me to hospital. Brother has Crohn’s disease so I’m getting worried. Seeing a specialist next month and wondering if anyone had similar symptoms before diagnosis or if this sounds more like post-infectious IBS.

I’m really scared so please be gentle.

Hey everyone,

I’m posting because I’m honestly getting pretty anxious and wanted to hear from people who may have had similar experiences.

For a while now I’ve been dealing with ongoing diarrhea, urgency, gas, mucus/wet farts and inconsistent bowel movements. Some days are noticeably better than others. I haven’t had blood in my stool, major abdominal pain or obvious weight loss.

Imodium helps a lot temporarily, but symptoms come back pretty quickly once I stop taking it.

Last year I got severe food poisoning from eating raw chicken which actually sent me to hospital because the diarrhea wouldn’t stop, so part of me wonders if this could be post-infectious IBS or some kind of long-term gut issue from that.

What’s making me more nervous is that my brother has Crohn’s disease.

I’ve recently stopped all supplements, creatine, protein powder etc and cleaned up my diet. I also started taking S. boulardii probiotics. Symptoms are still there though.

I am seeing a specialist next month, but I just wanted to ask if anyone here had similar symptoms before being diagnosed, especially people who didn’t initially have blood or severe pain.

Thanks everyone.

I had a real bad case of food poisoning. Constant diarrhea, couldn’t trust gas and had to go to the hospital to get checked in for fluids because it was never ending.

Eventually I somewhat recovered, but suddenly around September - October last year my stomach stuff started acting up.

I was taking some supplements and whey protein.

Now, I’ve stopped everything and only take some probiotics.

I still get mucusy stools and gas, some days I have to take Imodium just to go to work.

I’ve booked an appointment with a specialist for June - my older brother has Crohns, so I just want to cross that off the list.

No stomach pain, just this constant mucusy diarrhea.

There was a stage where psyllium husk was really helping and filling my stool, but now it just causes more loose stools. Don’t even get me started on oats.

Any suggestions?

It’s like my ADHD kicks in and I genuinely feel uncomfortable leaving the gym without finishing it. Even if there are alternate exercises and I’ve completed them, once I’ve mentally locked in that last movement, my brain refuses to move on.

And the worst part is I know it’s irrational. I’ll tell myself “just swap it for something else” or “come back tomorrow,” but it still feels unfinished. I start pacing around, checking if they’re done every 30 seconds, getting more annoyed at myself than the person using the machine.

It’s not even about the exercise at that point. It’s like my brain decided the workout only counts if I complete that exact final thing. But it also feels like that ‘part’ of my body is ‘un-burnt’.

First of all, I think what Curry Barker and Cooper achieved is genuinely incredible. A debut feature with this level of confidence, visual language, sound design, atmosphere and distribution is insanely impressive, especially at their age. Inde Navarrette was also fantastic. I loved the use of depth, corners, negative space and framing throughout.

But I also left the cinema feeling weirdly frustrated.

I think part of it is that the film felt more like escalation than progression. Things constantly intensified, but I rarely felt like the story itself was actually moving forward. It became a cycle of things getting more disturbing, more tense, more psychologically oppressive, but without enough emotional or narrative conversion for me personally.

I actually liked that the worldbuilding was restrained. I didn’t need the “tools” or the wishing willow fully explained. But I think I wanted at least some attempt from the characters to investigate or understand what was happening. Especially considering the relationship with Ian felt so close. If your best friend is clearly unraveling and terrified, why wouldn’t there be at least one genuine attempt at honesty or explanation?

Even if the friend didn’t believe him, or he struggled to articulate it, I still needed the attempt. Without it, the isolation started feeling less character-driven and more screenplay-driven to me.

Visually, I thought the silhouettes and darkness were effective at first, but became a little overused to the point where the film started feeling exhausting rather than immersive. Sound design and music were fantastic though.

I think what’s making my reaction complicated is that I simultaneously admire the filmmaking enormously while not fully loving the experience of watching it. And honestly, maybe some jealousy is mixed in there too. Seeing filmmakers younger than me make something this technically assured and culturally successful definitely stirs something up emotionally.

Curious if anyone else had a similar reaction, because most of the discussion I’m seeing is overwhelmingly positive.

What makes a runner standout to you?

What signs and attributes determine for you whether they have what it takes to move up in the production department?

What signs show they don’t?

Are ‘older’ runners a ‘turn-off’?

What makes a runner standout to you?

What signs and attributes determine for you whether they have what it takes to move up in the production department?

What signs show they don’t?

Are ‘older’ runners a ‘turn-off’?

I want to be useful but I also don’t want to get in the way.

I’m ensuring everyone’s plates and cups are packed away from their desks, bins are cleared, helping the Production Secretary in any way they need, tackling all my runs in time, taking photos, doing heavy lifting etc.

Is there anything I can do further in the office without being a nuisance / annoying / someone that breaks the flow?

We are about to start shooting so I understand things are ramping up and people are getting more and more stressed out.
But I also want more responsibility and feel useful.

Unless what I’m experiencing and doing is already the role of a Production Runner.

I’ve already asked the Production Secretary if they need any other help, I’ve done some coordination before and done PO’s etc. they said they’ll let me know.

I can’t keep asking without annoying them.

I end up not having that much to do as I try and do so much - maybe I need to pace myself? I also don’t want to then be seen as someone on my laptop not ‘doing anything’.

Any advice, I’d love some insight.

I just want to get better.

I’m also 28 years old so the insecurity of being 28 and still running is slightly rampant. And so, I’m just trying to calm myself.

I’m working as a production runner on a small kids TV show and lately I’ve been feeling really weird socially at work. I can’t tell if I’m picking up on actual dynamics or if I’m spiralling into a psychological pattern where I’m reading too much into things.

I’ve been feeling:

\- left out
\- not “in the mix”
\- like people prefer the other runner over me

For context, I’m technically runner #1, but the other runner seems to naturally get more engagement from people. She’s also a woman and objectively attractive, which I know can affect social dynamics in workplaces. I don’t mean that in a bitter or judgemental way, just trying to be honest about all the variables running through my head.

An example from today:

The production secretary let the other runner go home after she asked if there was anything left to do. I didn’t ask because I’ve always had the mindset that you never ask to leave early, you wait until you’re dismissed. The secretary didn’t say anything to me until eventually I asked, and then she said “you’re good to go, there’s nothing here to do.”

Objectively that sounds minor, but moments like that stack up in my head and start making me feel invisible or unwanted.

\- I genuinely can’t tell if:

\- There actually is a social preference happening

\- I’m accidentally isolating myself because I’m too reserved/professional

This is anxiety/insecurity making me hyper-analyse neutral interactions

Has anyone else in film/TV production felt like this before, especially in junior roles? How do you tell the difference between intuition and insecurity without going crazy?

TL;DR:
Production runner on a TV show feeling left out and less socially included than the other runner. Small interactions keep making me feel unwanted, but I can’t tell if it’s real workplace dynamics or anxiety/insecurity making me overanalyse everything.

I’m working as a production runner on a small kids TV show and lately I’ve been feeling really weird socially at work. I can’t tell if I’m picking up on actual dynamics or if I’m spiralling into a psychological pattern where I’m reading too much into things.

I’ve been feeling:

- left out
- not “in the mix”
- like people prefer the other runner over me

For context, I’m technically runner #1, but the other runner seems to naturally get more engagement from people. She’s also a woman and objectively attractive, which I know can affect social dynamics in workplaces. I don’t mean that in a bitter or judgemental way, just trying to be honest about all the variables running through my head.

An example from today:

The production secretary let the other runner go home after she asked if there was anything left to do. I didn’t ask because I’ve always had the mindset that you never ask to leave early, you wait until you’re dismissed. The secretary didn’t say anything to me until eventually I asked, and then she said “you’re good to go, there’s nothing here to do.”

Objectively that sounds minor, but moments like that stack up in my head and start making me feel invisible or unwanted.

- I genuinely can’t tell if:

- There actually is a social preference happening

- I’m accidentally isolating myself because I’m too reserved/professional

This is anxiety/insecurity making me hyper-analyse neutral interactions

Has anyone else in film/TV production felt like this before, especially in junior roles? How do you tell the difference between intuition and insecurity without going crazy?

TL;DR:
Production runner on a TV show feeling left out and less socially included than the other runner. Small interactions keep making me feel unwanted, but I can’t tell if it’s real workplace dynamics or anxiety/insecurity making me overanalyse everything.

TL;DR: My girlfriend wants to get skinnier/stronger but doesn’t really work out. I go to the gym 5-6 days a week. Would women want their partner to honestly say fitness is attractive to them, or would that just feel hurtful/pressuring?

My girlfriend has talked before about wanting to get skinnier, stronger, healthier etc, but she doesn’t really go to the gym or do much fitness-wise at the moment.

I go pretty regularly, usually 5-6 days a week, and we’re both trying to be more aware of food and eating healthier overall.

I’m also considering going on Mounjaro. We’ve talked about it openly and she’s supportive, although she doesn’t really love the idea.

What I’m wondering is this:

Would you want your partner to tell you that seeing you go to the gym or do something fitness-related genuinely makes you more attractive to them?

Not in a “you need to change” way, and definitely not as pressure or an ultimatum. I’d never force my partner to do anything, and I love her regardless. This isn’t remotely a dealbreaker.

I just don’t know if saying something like that is motivating/honest, or if most women would hear it as criticism no matter how carefully it’s said.

TL;DR: Mother’s Day movie plans changed a few times, family dynamics got involved, my partner couldn’t properly come anymore, and I suddenly spiralled into feeling depressed, overwhelmed, resentful and emotionally checked out. I can’t tell if I’m exhausted, overstimulated, emotionally burnt out, or if something deeper is going on with me.

Today was Mother’s Day and the original plan was simple. My mum and I were going to see a scary movie because we both love horror films.

Then one brother joined. Fine.

Then my other brother joined last minute, even though he doesn’t like scary movies, which already threw me a bit because it changed the vibe of what I thought the night was going to be.

Then the timing changed later than I wanted. Then one brother suggested splitting off into different movies with my dad and his girlfriend. Then everyone decided to just all see another movie together instead.

By that point I felt completely emotionally checked out.
The original plan no longer felt like the original plan. It felt hijacked or diluted or something. I suddenly felt overwhelmed by all the changes and options and social dynamics and just wanted to leave.

Another layer is that I have issues with one of my brothers already, so when the plans started orbiting around him more I think I subconsciously shut down.
My partner also couldn’t comfortably come anymore because she was working, and it suddenly felt unfair or messy trying to organise separate cars and rushing around.

I ended up deciding not to go and just went home.
Now I’m sitting here feeling depressed, annoyed, guilty, emotionally flat and weirdly isolated.

There are other things adding to it too:

- I’m exhausted from work lately

- I didn’t go to the gym properly this weekend

- I really wanted to see a movie this weekend and now didn’t get to

- Seeing my dad uncomfortable physically really affects me emotionally because his health isn’t great

- Movies are emotionally important to me because I work in film/TV, so seeing movies feels intimate and personal, not casual

I’ve also realised I almost prefer seeing movies alone now because I don’t like feeling emotionally responsible for everyone else’s experience or compromises.

I genuinely cannot tell if I’m being dramatic, overstimulated, emotionally burnt out, avoidant, resentful, depressed, or all of the above.

TL;DR: I’m a runner on a low budget TV shoot and every few weeks I bring donuts or croissants into the production office just to lift the mood a bit. Some people tried to pay me back and someone joked that they hire me because they like me, not because I buy snacks. Now I’m overthinking whether it comes across strangely.

I’m a runner on a TV show and every 2 to 4 weeks I’ll bring a box of donuts or croissants into the production office.

It’s never anything expensive and I never expect to be reimbursed. I just like doing small things that make the day feel a little less grim, especially on low budget shoots where everyone is tired and stressed half the time.

Today a few people tried to pay me back and one person jokingly said, “we bring you on because we like you, not because you buy us snacks.”

They were definitely kidding and it was said nicely, but afterward it made me wonder whether this kind of thing is actually normal or if it reads like I’m trying too hard socially.

From my perspective it’s genuinely just a morale thing. I like the office crew and every now and then it feels nice to bring in something small for everyone.

Curious how other people in production read this kind of thing.

TL;DR: I’m a runner on a low budget TV shoot and every few weeks I bring donuts or croissants into the production office just to lift the mood a bit. Some people tried to pay me back and someone joked that they hire me because they like me, not because I buy snacks. Now I’m overthinking whether it comes across strangely.

I’m a runner on a TV show and every 2 to 4 weeks I’ll bring a box of donuts or croissants into the production office.

It’s never anything expensive and I never expect to be reimbursed. I just like doing small things that make the day feel a little less grim, especially on low budget shoots where everyone is tired and stressed half the time.

Today a few people tried to pay me back and one person jokingly said, “we bring you on because we like you, not because you buy us snacks.”

They were definitely kidding and it was said nicely, but afterward it made me wonder whether this kind of thing is actually normal or if it reads like I’m trying too hard socially.

From my perspective it’s genuinely just a morale thing. I like the office crew and every now and then it feels nice to bring in something small for everyone.

Curious how other people in production read this kind of thing.