u/ThickProcedure3547

Hi there. I (27M) am considering a move to Nashville in Summer 2017 from NYC. I was born and raised in the NY suburbs, but I went to school in the Midwest and developed an appreciation for smaller cities.

Of course, I know Nashville is different from either place I mentioned, but I was wondering if any other transplants could tell me about their experience moving to Nashville. If I move, it would be in the middle of a career switch where I’m taking online classes and working part-time on the side. Any advice/stories would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance!

First time in a few months, 9 months total since the second discard. It’ll be a group setting.

I’m at the point (for the first time) where I genuinely don’t care if we talk. A big part of me would prefer if we just kept distance, because I’m honestly sick of her actions not matching her words. But I also recognize we’ll be in public around mutual friends who don’t know our history. So I want to be respectful of that and not make things awkward if possible. How do I balance this? And what should I expect from her?

For context, our relationship and dynamic have looked something like this: Second discard —> 6 weeks of limited contact —> rejected when I asked to grab coffee —> 2 months of strict NC —> texted me a week after we ran into each other and apologized for “being cold when things ended” and asked for friendship —> 3 months of social overlap, a few conversations but nothing too deep —> last 2.5 months have been basically NC

I have my first date tonight since my (second) discard 8 months ago. It’s been a long road back.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss my FA ex — however, I’m also at the point where I know she can’t handle a real relationship, including the half-assed “friendship” she offered a few months ago.

Any advice for tonight? I’m excited for sure, but I also don’t know how I’m going to react in the moment with this new girl.

What is the expected time difference for a racer doing his first solo pro race? I understand this will vary by person, but does anyone have a good estimate from their own experience?

Never thought I'd post something with the Vent/Rant flair, but here we are. I truly don't understand my FA ex (yes, I see the irony in typing that out).
After four months (including two of NC), she reached out and apologized for acting cold at the end of the breakup. She requested friendship, which I agreed to. Since then, we see each other about 1-2 times per week due to social overlap. Everything has been warm and cordial, but there's definitely still an awkwardness coming from her end. As for "friendship," she's made very little intentional effort to back that up.

This morning, my buddy and I were running together, and we saw her on a run with a run club going the other direction. This buddy of mine knows her and has a solid/perfectly normal friendship with her. As we realized it was her, we called her name to say hi, but she was talking to someone and apparently didn't hear us -- totally fair given the situation and crowd size, so I don't hold that against her. Immediately (without me asking him), my friend texted the three of us in a group chat (which we've used before) -- "You totally ignored us on that run." — very clearly as a lighthearted joke.

A full day has gone by now, and there's been no response from her -- not even a "Haha sorry, didn't see you!". Remember, this is a friend with whom she's totally comfortable with, in a group chat the three of us have occasionally used before with no issue... and she still couldn't find the decency to respond. There's been nothing heavy or life-changing between us since the apology, so I don't see why she felt the need to ignore our friend's text like that.

Sorry, I realize I'm venting. Just trying to understand how this is somehow getting more awkward without me pushing the issue whatsoever.

My ex consistently praised my emotional maturity, saying things like:

- “Your parents did such an amazing job with you.”

- “You always know exactly what to say” and then that same night “See? Exactly what to say” after I reassured her about something.

- “You handle everything scarily well” and when I laughed it off, she double downed on it.

These were all genuine and from a place of admiration, but I wonder if they also scared her a bit. We went through a rupture/reconnection cycle before she called it off for good, citing “speed and pressure” after I told her I loved her (I knew nothing about attachment styles at that time).

I’m wondering if anyone else has experience with this, and what it means for what she feels/thinks about me 7 months after the breakup. We still have mutual friends and see each other around. It’s been warm and cordial, but there definitely still feels like heaviness or guardedness between us.

When an FA breaks up with you due to engulfment/intimacy fears (and not a loss of attraction), is their hesitation to treat you normally due to their own feelings? Or do they know the person who got dumped still has feelings and doesn’t want to lead them on?

For context, my FA ex has apologized and asked for friendship, as we share the same social circle and still see each other in public fairly often. It’s been a fine dynamic, but there’s definitely a hesitation and a heaviness between us, even though the conversations are normal and casual. But there’s undoubtedly a difference with how she treats me versus other friends in that same circle.

Just wondering what that honestly stems from.

I’m too young to remember his first trilogy and only got into Kanye in college.

What were those early days like? Was he really known in the media/fan circles before dropping Through the Wire? And how fast did he gain popularity when he started dropping albums?

My FA ex and I broke up 6 months ago after a very emotionally intense relationship — safe, high chemistry, the whole bit. Things just got overwhelming for her and she pulled out. We reconnected through our shared fitness community about 2 months ago, and since then the dynamic has been warm but ambiguous. There’s still clear chemistry/emotional attachment between us, but no actual reconciliation movement.

We both have a race tomorrow — I run in the morning, and she goes in the late afternoon. She specifically asked me to tell her my start time, referenced seeing me there, and was warm/supportive over text when I sent it. But she never explicitly said she’s coming to watch my race, and now I’m worried she probably won’t. Granted, mine is very early in the morning. But I know for certain (based on her schedule) she could be there if she wanted.

Here’s my dilemma: I had already been planning to watch/support her race later in the day. But now I’m struggling with whether I should still do that if she doesn’t show up for mine. Part of me feels like support shouldn’t be transactional. Another part feels like I’m constantly the one willing to show up emotionally while she keeps things safe/ambiguous.

Should I still go support her if she doesn’t come to my race? Or would that just be overextending myself emotionally at that point?

She apologized about 4 months after we broke up for the second time in a few months. This came about a week after the first time seeing her after a 2-month NC period. She asked for friendship if I was open to it. I said sure (mainly because I didn’t want to escalate or “get into it” via text).

Since then, she’s been steadily warm in group settings. Not a ton of initiation, but some flickers of our old dynamic. We even had a private 1:1 conversation a few weeks ago that was mostly just catching up, but still felt very intimate.

I invited her to a party at my place that included a few mutual friends whom she’s definitely still close with. She sat on the invite for 4 days before simply declining via the app — no message or separate acknowledgment attached.

I saw her again today and we had a few minor interactions. What gets me is that she still seems to keep me at arm’s length. Not necessarily on purpose, but I can tell she’s wary of showing me the same natural energy she gives others. I just don’t know what to think.

We dated for ~3 months and broke up about 6 months ago. The breakup wasn’t due to lack of connection, but more her feeling overwhelmed when things started to escalate emotionally. After ~2 months of no contact, we naturally reconnected through shared social circles. Since then, we’ve been warm and friendly in person (mostly group settings, occasional brief 1:1 interactions), and there’s still clear comfort and familiarity when we see each other.

However, the pattern has remained inconsistent and hard to interpret. She has not initiated personal communication beyond logistics, recently declined a group invite I sent, and has generally pulled back from more direct engagement (e.g., stopped viewing my IG stories after previously watching consistently). At the same time, there is no hostility or awkwardness in person—just warmth without clear forward movement.

I feel stuck because I’m seeing:
— Warm, engaged behavior in person vs. lack of initiation outside of shared contexts

— She previously apologized unprompted after the breakup

— We reconnected organically after no contact, rather than fully fading out

— Clear comfort and positive tone in group interactions despite distance elsewhere

— Mixed signals (e.g., past consistent IG story viewing vs. recent complete stop)

— No explicit “final” boundary stated during reconnection phase, unlike post-breakup phase

— Declining invites without shutting down contact entirely or redefining the relationship

I’m trying to understand whether this is a normal “friendly ex in shared social circles” situation that I’m over-interpreting, or whether ambiguity like this is actually common in post-breakup reconnections where one person is more avoidant.

Thanks!