u/Traditional-Cry-3857

I’m 49F. My therapist just suggested I have religious trauma. It had never occurred to me that religion harmed me, really.

I grew up in a relatively conservative Christian denomination. We went to church twice a week and I was taught that god knows our every thought.

My whole life I have chased away every negative thought I had, concerned that someone knew everything I was thinking. Not surprisingly, I have pretty severe anxiety. To this day I have a voice in my head judging me harshly. I kind of thought everyone had the same experience until I discussed it in therapy and then brought it up with a few friends.

Does anyone else experience this? Any tips on moving past it?

It is so messed up that parents teach their kids that they are so horrible that a man had to be brutally tortured and killed to ‘save’ them.

I am wondering how many of you can relate to this.

For the last year or so, I have been in a constantly anxious brain space. I feel like basically every single thought I have is either an anxious thought, immediately leads to an anxious thought or is ruminating on something from my past that I don't have any ability to fix at this point.

For example, I was recently taking a walk and was momentarily enjoying myself and thinking it was a nice day. My next thought was, "oh my god, climate change!"

It's been going on for so long, I'm scared that my brain has been rewired. I feel like I'll never feel better. I have talked to my psychiatrist and therapist about it extensively and tried several different meds.

So if you've been through this, were you able to get out of it? I feel like it would help to hear from other people.

I posted last week about a potential family saying they couldn’t justify my (very reasonable) rate for ‘just keeping the kids alive.’

Well, today I got a message from a mom looking for 24/7 on call for a toddler and newborn, no regular schedule, $25 an hour in my HCOL area. My husband and I laughed and laughed.

I think I’m ready to go back to teaching.

My current NK is starting preschool and I am looking for a new family to work with. A family messaged me and said my profile, which listed my rate, looked great. This family has 3 children. They just replied to my last message with ‘we just can’t justify paying that much for someone who just keeps our kids alive.’ My listed rate was less than I am making right now and well within the range of nanny pay in my area. I have a Master’s degree in ECE and over 20 years of experience. I obviously don’t want to work for a family who thinks all a nanny does is keep the kids alive, but I’m debating whether I should even bother responding. What would you do?

I have taken Klonopin to fly for at least 10 years. I’m flying in 3 days, and my psychiatrist just told me he won’t prescribe me any because it is no longer considered safe.

He asked if any other PRN meds have helped me in the past, and when I said Seroquel he said that would make me too drowsy. It didn’t the last time I took it.

He ended up prescribing Hydroxyzine. Has any one had luck with this? I’ve never taken it. I am considering skipping the trip but it is for my SILs wedding and that part of my family already thinks I’m crazy. My husband would also be alone with the kids which is a big ask.

Edit: The doctor told me to take the hydroxyzine tonight to see if it worked for me. I took it about an hour ago, and holy shit, I feel less anxious than I have been in months.

I am going to a white tie dinner (requiring an updo) and have fine, thin, 2c/3a hair falling between my cheek bones and chin. Anyone have inspiration? I am at a loss!

Routine to follow the rules:

Wash with Cake The Curl Girl shampoo and Cake The Curl Next door conditioner every 2-3 days.

Rake in Curls Blueberry Bliss leave in conditioner while still quite wet.

Rake in Curls Blueberry Bilss gel while wet.

Brush upside down with a curl defining brush.

Air dry.

I forgot to take my olanzapine last night. I had no problem falling asleep or staying asleep and woke up at 5:30 am after 8 hours of sleep. I usually have to sleep 10 hours and have an incredibly difficult time getting out of bed.

It just kind of pisses me off that the med makes me so damn sleepy. Anyone else experience this? I didn’t realize how much olanzapine affected me until this morning. Have you found any other APs that don’t have this effect?

Don’t worry, I have zero plans of going off my meds! I have been med compliant for decades.

I was diagnosed with agoraphobia last week although upon reflection, I've probably had it since childhood (I'm 48). My therapist read me the diagnostic items from the DSM and I was completely shocked by how accurately they described me. She said we can start working on it this week, so I have a bit of hope?

Does anyone have relevant books or podcasts they recommend? Or online support groups?

I'm reading about exposure therapy and it sounds like torture. To those of you who have been through it, was it extremely hard to start? Did it get easier? Did it help?

I also have Generalized Anxiety Disorder and a mood disorder and My therapist suggested that I think about the interaction between them and how each might feed the others. Any insights on this?

Thank you so much, I'm feeling quite lost in this.

Edit: paragraph breaks and typo

If you’ve gone through Newborn care certification, did you think it was helpful? Which organization did you use?

I’m considering this. I have 2 decades of experience working with infants, but very little newborn experience.