u/Turronblando

Hello everyone,

For a few years I have had poor vision even when corrected. Objects further than about 50 cm are blurry, and above a few meters very blurry. I went to an ophthalmologist and despite doing a full check, they said the eyes and prescription were fine. But clearly, something isn't fine; it's like my prescription is 1 or 2 diopters off! They suggested it might be dryness, but 8 months of the 20/20/20 rule, daily eyedrops and anti-blepharitis gel haven't helped at all. I'd even say the severity is worsening. Does anyone have any idea what it could be? I fear that no matter how many ophthalmologists or optometrists I go to, they will dismiss it and not help.

Hi, first of all, please don't assume anything from this post. I worship my wife, I respect the unimaginable effort she's put in, I respect her right to work, I don't think women have any duties due to their gender, etc.

But my wife starting a new job has really put a spanner in my own work. I'm a last-year PhD student (salaried); my rhythm is working from 9 to 5 every day except Sundays. I settled into this rhythm after trying others, especially when our son was first born, such as working at night, which didn't work for a plethora of reasons (sleep schedule, AuDHD). I should point out that our 2-year-old son is very difficult; he's non-verbal and doesn't understand anything, he is in the 1st percentile for expressive and receptive speech. This means looking after him is a full-on thing, you have to stand around him all day and he has constant tantrums about everything, particularly the needs he's unable to express.

My wife's new job is from 1.30 to 10 PM; since she has to drive an hour, she's gone from 12.30 to 11 PM. It's every day, Monday to Sunday. If it seems relevant to you, our salaries are about the same (minimum wage). On weekdays, my son's daycare finishes at 1 PM, and obviously at the weekend he's just at home all the time. As you can imagine, this means I can only really get 3.5 hours of work in before then having to look after our son for almost 10 hours. This means that instead of the 42h of work I should be doing for my thesis at a crucial moment, I can only do just about half of that; this is without getting how exhausting it will be to work AND look after the kid for 10 hours and lose my single rest day (and yes, I am very, very grateful that my wife did this for so long, it's somewhat hypocritical of me, but she didn't have to worry about a monumental work task on top of it, which I feel is the main sanity breaker here).

I'm not judging anyone, but I just don't see how to get out of this scenario where I essentially have to sacrifice my career and sanity to facilitate my wife working. I'd appreciate any advice or tips for a solution... I'm especially worried that we will just grow to resent each other over this complete incompatibility. Maybe I could go to bed the second she gets back, sleep 7 hours, get up at 6 AM and work the 7 hours at that point, but that feels very optimistic and not so doable...

Hi, was hoping to get some insight into whether this is a legit treatment. I’ve had a fixed lingual retainer (canine-to-canine) for 9 years; after one bond failed recently on a lower incisor, two orthodontists made adjustments. The first one left me with persistent pressure and possibly the lower incisor shifting forward. The second claimed the latter is impossible since lower teeth only move backwards, but (I assume?) to fix the pressure has removed the bonding on it completely and wants to see what happens in a month's time before rebonding — does this management sound reasonable?

Hi, was hoping to get some insight into whether this is a legit treatment. I’ve had a fixed lingual retainer (canine-to-canine) for 9 years; after one bond failed recently on a lower incisor, two orthodontists made adjustments. The first one left me with persistent pressure and possibly the lower incisor shifting forward. The second claimed the latter is impossible since lower teeth only move backwards, but (I assume?) to fix the pressure has removed the bonding on it completely and wants to see what happens in a month's time before rebonding — does this management sound reasonable?

Hi, was hoping to get some insight into whether this is a legit treatment. I’ve had a fixed lingual retainer (canine-to-canine) for 9 years; after one bond failed recently on a lower incisor, two orthodontists made adjustments. The first one left me with persistent pressure and possibly the lower incisor shifting forward. The second claimed the latter is impossible since lower teeth only shift backwards, but (I assume?) to fix the pressure has removed the bonding on it completely and wants to see what happens in a month's time before rebonding — does this management sound reasonable? I really don't want my teeth to shift, or to get misaligned... I just wanted it rebonded without pressure and that's it...

Hi everyone,

I have had a lingual retainer (canine to canine) for the past 9 years. The wire broke in 2022 and the orthodontist I had been with since the start replaced it. All good so far. It's important to know I moved countries not long after that. Then two months ago, one of the bonds cracked (on the left-most incisor) and I felt pressure in the tooth. Went to a new orthodontist a month ago and he removed the broken bonding, then glued back that same blob; after this I noticed a lot of pressure on the wire between the incisor and canine, and that the incisor moved forward ever so slightly, now misaligned with the center-left incisor (unlike previously). Since I still have this pressure a month in, I went to the same office but a different orthodontist. She prescribed to (and actually went ahead with, without consent) remove the bonding on that tooth completely to let it move back a bit, and then rebond it in a month. She also claimed that the bottom teeth can only shift backwards, which is what the wire prevents (now that she has, my tooth is leaning even more forward). This, uh... doesn't sound very scientific to me. But both these orthodontists teach at universities and have good online reviews. Are they stringing me along for unnecessary procedures? I just wanted to not have uncomfortable pressure on the wire between those teeth...

They have done it totally free both times, which is weird – I live in a country with free healthcare but all dentistry is private. I'm concerned by that (I really should start questioning it when it happens) and by what seems to be inaccurate information. What should I do? I live in a tiny town so I avoided going to the local office, since I fear it could be a bit predatory (this is in Europe). But if needbe I could go there and have them rebond the wire to the tooth.

Hi everyone,

I have had a lingual retainer (canine to canine) for the past 9 years. The wire broke in 2022 and the orthodontist I had been with since the start replaced it. All good so far. It's important to know I moved countries not long after that. Then two months ago, one of the bonds cracked (on the left-most incisor) and I felt pressure in the tooth. Went to a new orthodontist a month ago and he removed the broken bonding, then glued back that same blob; after this I noticed a lot of pressure on the wire between the incisor and canine, and that the incisor moved forward ever so slightly, now misaligned with the center-left incisor (unlike previously). Since I still have this pressure a month in, I went to the same office but a different orthodontist. She prescribed to (and actually went ahead with, without consent) remove the bonding on that tooth completely to let it move back a bit, and then rebond it in a month. She also claimed that the bottom teeth can only shift backwards, which is what the wire prevents (now that she has, my tooth is leaning even more forward). This, uh... doesn't sound very scientific to me. But both these orthodontists teach at universities and have good online reviews. Are they stringing me along for unnecessary procedures? I just wanted to not have uncomfortable pressure on the wire between those teeth...

They have done it totally free both times, which is weird – I live in a country with free healthcare but all dentistry is private. I'm concerned by that (I really should start questioning it when it happens) and by what seems to be inaccurate information. What should I do? I live in a tiny town so I avoided going to the local office, since I fear it could be a bit predatory (this is in Europe). But if needbe I could go there and have them rebond the wire to the tooth.

Hi everyone,

I have had a lingual retainer (canine to canine) for the past 9 years. The wire broke in 2022 and the orthodontist I had been with since the start replaced it. All good so far. It's important to know I moved countries not long after that. Then two months ago, one of the bonds cracked (on the left-most incisor) and I felt pressure in the tooth. Went to a new orthodontist a month ago and he removed the broken bonding, then glued back that same blob; after this I noticed a lot of pressure on the wire between the incisor and canine, and that the incisor moved forward ever so slightly, now misaligned with the center-left incisor (unlike previously). Since I still have this pressure a month in, I went to the same office but a different orthodontist. She prescribed to (and actually went ahead with, without consent) remove the bonding on that tooth completely to let it move back a bit, and then rebond it in a month. She also claimed that the bottom teeth can only shift backwards, which is what the wire prevents (now that she has, my tooth is leaning even more forward). This, uh... doesn't sound very scientific to me. But both these orthodontists teach at universities and have good online reviews. Are they stringing me along for unnecessary procedures? I just wanted to not have uncomfortable pressure on the wire between those teeth...

They have done it totally free both times, which is weird – I live in a country with free healthcare but all dentistry is private. I'm concerned by that (I really should start questioning it when it happens) and by what seems to be inaccurate information. What should I do? I live in a tiny town so I avoided going to the local office, since I fear it could be a bit predatory (this is in Europe). But if needbe I could go there and have them rebond the wire to the tooth.

Hola a todos,

Me encuentro en una situación única y muy complicada. En un principio me mudé a Italia y allí empecé un doctorado en 2023, para lo cual recibí una beca local (italiana). En 2024, mi universidad firmó un acuerdo de cotutela con una universidad española para que yo pudiera continuar mis estudios aquí durante un tiempo. En 2025 viví únicamente en España. No tengo claro, por tanto, si el límite de la exención de la beca debe ser de 21 000 o de 24 600 euros: estoy en España y cursando simultáneamente un tercer ciclo español, sí, pero al mismo tiempo en Italia; la beca es extranjera y estaba destinada originalmente a un curso en el extranjero. ¿Cuál de las dos exenciones se aplica? Ni siquiera Hacienda ha sido capaz de responderme, ni de decirme qué tengo que declarar (cuando pregunté el año pasado – ahora ni siquiera puedo hacer eso, porque su línea telefónica está saturada). Recibí un total de 21 334,84 € en 2025.

De momento he declarado 334,84€ para 2025, visto que me parece más probable que se considera la exención de 21000, y mejor declarar innecesariamente que no declarar lo que se tiene que declarar (y así cometer un crimen por falta de claridad). Pero, obviamente, me gustaría saber si esto es correcto y, si no lo es, qué demonios hay que hacer exactamente.

Si creéis que debería ponerme en contacto con un asesor, ya he contactado con una docena; ninguno de ellos ni de broma quiere tocar este caso.

Gracias por cualquier información o consejo al respecto.