u/Upper_Potential8164

i keep getting my post removed everywhere else so plz help me 😭

When i started learning ssquats i always thought i HAD to hold my leg for it to count. it didnt take me too long to do it with no hands (maybe it was actually a long time relative to the exercise itself). so i figured that since it was quick to do no hands, the actual exercise had to be done holding a leg.

But then when i was looking around i also saw others counting their squats w out holding their legs. is it personal preference? or is there a standard? what do yall consider real shrimp squats?

thanks!

I would like to try it at least once but it's honestly confusing to figure out how it works. Im still a freshman so I dont expect to go anytime soon but I would like to consider studying abroad at least once.

If anyone has gone, where did you go? How was the process to apply? Are the areas safe (as in the academic areas)?

What about scholarships?

I know its a lot but im mostly just asking if theres anything i should know before even considering. When the time comes, i will also talk to my academic advisor so I can figure it out.

Thanks 😊

Okay so i’m an incoming freshman and i have always worked out at home. I do not feel comfortable going to a gym because I’m a girl that has no clue about the area as I’m not from here (which I’ve heard is an unsafe area). I don’t think I’d be comfortable going to a school gym either honestly, if I’m even allowed as a non athlete.

I am going to live in a triple and I’d like to bring a yoga mat to workout. I do calisthenics (with the exception of dumbbells, although rare) and dont need equipment. However, I am very tall (6’) so I need to know if there’s room.

Has anyone else had this issue? Sure i guess i could suck it up and go to a gym but it isnt my first option since I genuinely just dont feel safe for now.

Is there room in a triple to do basic bodyweight skills & progressions? Workouts are mostly 20-45 mins depending on waht im training and my mood. I doubt they’ll be long as I will first need to learn to adapt to the new area and schedule so I will probably keep them short for a while.

Ok thanks guys plz help me out here!!

Im majoring in Philosophy as an incoming freshman. Does anyone know if using a regular notebook or an iPad would be better? I prefer traditional notebooks but I was wondering if professors would have a preference or if one is more efficient and helpful than another.

If a regular notebook what size r yall using? Or does it depend on the class? I have a bunch of unused notebooks and i wanna bring the "right one" instead of winging it and bringing all of them and usinf only a specific one, or none at all

Thanks 😊

Okay so i’m an incoming freshman and i have always worked out at home. I do not feel comfortable going to a gym because I’m a girl that has no clue about the area as I’m not from here (which I’ve heard is an unsafe area). I don’t think I’d be comfortable going to a school gym either honestly, if I’m even allowed as a non athlete.

I am going to live in a triple and I’d like to bring a yoga mat to workout. I do calisthenics (with the exception of dumbbells, although rare) and dont need equipment. However, I am very tall (6’) so I need to know if there’s room.

Has anyone else had this issue? Sure i guess i could suck it up and go to a gym but it isnt my first option since I genuinely just dont feel safe for now.

Is there room in a triple to do basic bodyweight skills & progressions? Workouts are mostly 20-45 mins depending on waht im training and my mood. I doubt they’ll be long as I will first need to learn to adapt to the new area and schedule so I will probably keep them short for a while.

Ok thanks guys plz help me out here!!

Okay so i’m an incoming freshman and i have always worked out at home. I do not feel comfortable going to a gym because I’m a girl that has no clue about the area as I’m not from here (which I’ve heard is an unsafe area). I don’t think I’d be comfortable going to a school gym either honestly, if I’m even allowed as a non athlete.

I am going to live in a triple and I’d like to bring a yoga mat to workout. I do calisthenics (with the exception of dumbbells, although rare) and dont need equipment. However, I am very tall (6’) so I need to know if there’s room.

Has anyone else had this issue? Sure i guess i could suck it up and go to a gym but it isnt my first option since I genuinely just dont feel safe for now.

Is there room in a triple to do basic bodyweight skills & progressions? Workouts are mostly 20-45 mins depending on waht im training and my mood. I doubt they’ll be long as I will first need to learn to adapt to the new area and schedule so I will probably keep them short for a while.

Ok thanks guys plz help me out here!!

was my dad emotionally manipulative to us? or am i just looking to be a victim? please help a teenager out

Some tactic by my dad to degrade me into being his version of what a woman should be? Or is this a dad whos going thru the mistakes of a father raising his eldest daughter?

WILL be VERY long so please read it if you would like to help a teen & her younger sisters!!💞

I am about to be an adult and go into college. I am moving away from home. I need to know if my dad was ever emotionally or mentally abusive, manipulative, etc. just because it's a concept I always deemed impossible.

Here are a few experiences I need external evaluation of. Please tell me if I'm dramatic or there was actually a problem. I'm posting this here because i grew up VERY privileged, generally comfortable living although our housing and my parents' marital status was faulty at times.

I don't know what's manipulation or not because he always said "You have it easy. Your problems will never be as much as mine or your mom's'." I know that. I grew up feeling I never had a reason to complain, but my mom says that he did emotionally manipulate and abuse her as well, so she says he did so to us. I need to know I'm a spoiled brat who got it easy (as my dad would say) or if my overthinking is lowkey right.

A few examples! I'll number them and try to make them as short as possible:

1. He used to talk about my acne scars (they were and still are VERY severe, theyre on my entire back and arms but improved!). I wore a tank too, and he said "Just because nobody says anything doesnt mean they cant see them." Always told me I had scars and acne because I was dirty and I had to clean myself. He would show me videos constantly about how acne forms. This has been since I was 10.

2. Said guys would be "all over me" when I was in HS. When it didn't, hes now saying it'll happen in my adulthood. Feels like such a let down. I feel that i needed attention to be pretty and when I didn't get it (I never pursued because I'm naturally reserved), thats when I knew I was objectively ugly. Its a reality that took me years to accept and I used to be so jealous. It's like. "Why isn't this happening to me when the only male figure in my life, who I get my only perspective of men from, said it would happen?" anyway i kinda stopped caring (im coping heh)

3. Always said "You think like a woman, don't do that because men will find you difficult. Women don't know what they want. They over explain, aren't direct." One time he asked my sister and I that if a cart weighs 100 Ibs on a scale, how much does it weigh when you push it. We had no physics prior knowledge but, after some quick 1 minute discussion, said it feels it weighs less because gravity isnt against you. Then, as if he was waiting for us to finish talking, said "Okay, I hear you, but you guys are thinking like women." And then proceeded to explain why it still is a 100 Ibs even though we technically never said it WAS less, but it FELT like it was less weight. Is this abusive or at least manipulative in any form?

4. When I was going into middle school (10-11), I didn't feel pretty. i'm blasian, so he took me aside and googled blasian girls around my age and asked me "Do you think youre prettier than them?" I remember nodding. He said "That's all you need to know, so stop comparing yourself to girls that aren't your same ethnicity."

5. Said other black girls and women would be jealous of me & my sisters because we had lighter skin and "better hair" (my hair is 3a curly). ABSOLUTELY disgusting. I HATE thinking about myself when I believed him. I just feel like saying sorry for even thinking this was true. He made OUR people (he's black btw) my rivals.

6. We were watching a show and a teen girl got her first car from her parents. A fellow family member was explaining to the father of the teen girl that the car they chose for their daughter was perfect for s3x because of the reclining seats and noise cancellation and size of the car. Then he looked at me and thought it was funny. I was maybe 13 or 14. I still physically cringe.

7. When I was 14 and going into high school, I never wore makeup. He said "It's time you should start doing so. Y'know to look more presentable." he said it from a kind (?) tone. I get makeup makes you look more awake but it was just off putting to say. Still not comfortable with makeup at 17.

OKAY THATS IT!! PLEAAASEE tell me if im being dramatic and spoiled or if this was some form of..something.

Here are my thoughts:

I still love him a lot. I don't want him to be an enemy, but everytime he gets close (both physically or thru conversation topics) I get very tense (verbally i stfu and physically i cringe and pull away). I just shut down. I end up being blunt and rude when I speak.

Then I feel bad & like a bad daughter for it. I don't know whether I am protecting my self or being angsty unprecedentedly.

Worth considering this, if it helps with context:

He painted my mama in a bad light SO much. It feels she never got the chance to raise me because i saw her as the bad guy and my dad took the spotlight as the parent "who actually cared" while she was the one who thought money bought happiness (she was the primary breadwinner majority of my life).

He always said that because my mom grew up in India she came from a family that was always yelling and didnt know how to communicate (holy orientalist driving the stereotype the "East is barbaric" aand he has little respect or knowledge of my culture on my moms side. he probably thinks im middle eastern 😭).

He led me to believe my mom couldn't communicate, she was quick to anger because "all of THOSE people are like that." I feel i was manipulated into being a daddy's girl. But dw my mama and i are very close now! 💞🥹

And the ultimate question!

So now, how do i carry myself into adulthood? I am very fearful of ending up with a man like him. I'm afraid of vulnerability in relationships (platonic and romantic, but ive never had a romantic relationship heh). How do i not allow myself to get too close to people and remain detached?

I'm so confused i just want some adulthood wisdom. I know i csnt do this on my own.

my main question is if he was abusive or these are just mean experiences and mistakes of a father raising his eldest daughter, please keep this in mind!! thank u 🥹

reallt need evaluation, this WILL be very long so please read it if you would like to help a teen!! 💞

i am about to be an adult and go into college. i am moving away from home, and going into "the real world" (corny i know sorry heh) i need to know if my dad was ever emotionally or mentally abusive, manipulative, etc. just because its a concept i always deemed impossible since i used to be a daddy's girl when i was little, but now im anything but.

here are a few experiences i need external evaluation of and please tell me if im dramatic or there was actually a problem

im posting this here because i grew up VERY privileged, generally comfortable living although our housinf and my parents' marital status was faulty at times. i need to know im a spoiled brat who got it easy (as my dad would say) or if my overthinking is lowkey right.

here are my experiences, ill number them and try to make them as short as possible

1. my dad used to talk about my acne scars (they were and still are VERY severe, theyre on my entire back and arms but improved!) and said that just because nobody says anything doesnt mean they cant see them and he always told me i had both scars and acne because i was dirty and i had to clean myself; is this a normal or abusive thing to say to a teen girl?

2. he would say that guys would be "all over me" when i "grew up"; he said this would happen in HS, and when it didnt, hes now saying itll happen in my adulthood. it feels like such a let down. i feel that i needed attention to be pretty and when i didnt get it (i never pursued it because im naturally reserved) thats when i knew i was objectively ugly. its a reality that took me years to accept and i felt so jealous, because its like "why isnt this happening to me when the only male figure in my life, who i get my only perspective of men from, said it would happen?" anyway i kinda stopped caring (im coping heh)

3. he used to tell me that i think like a woman and that women didnt know what they wanted, too; he would say women overexain and arent direct; one time he asked my sister and i that if a cart weighs 100 lbs on a scale, how much does it weigh when you push it. we had no physics prior knowledge but, after some quick 1 minute discussion, said that it feels it weighs less because gravity isnt against you. then, as if he was waiting for us to finish talking, said "okay, i hear you, but you guys are thinking like women." and then proceeded to explain why it still is a 100 lbs even though we technically never said it WAS less, but it FELT like it was less weight. is this abusive in any form?

4. when i was going into middle school i didnt feel pretty, and im blasian, so he took me aside and googled blasian girls around my age and asked me if i thoufht i was prettier than them, and i said yes (i was 11 or maybe even 10) and said thats all i needed to know; what was this?

5. he would say that other black girls and women would be jealous of me because i had lighter skin and "better hair" (my hair is 3a curly); ABSOLUTELY disgusting i hate thinking about myself when i thought he wss rigjt. I hate it so much and i just feel like saying sorry for even thinking this was true. he made my own people (hes also black btw) my rivals.

6. we were watching a show and a teen girl got her first car from her parents and then in the show a family member was explaining to rhe father of the teen girl that the car they chose for their daughter was perfect for s3x because of the reclining seats and noise cancellation and size of the car, and then he looked at me and thought it was funny. i was maybe 13 or 14

7. when i was 14 and going into high school i never wore makeup but my dad told me it was time i should start doing so; he said it from a kind (?) tone, just to mention; what anout this?

OKAY THATS IT!! PLEAAASEE tell me if im being dramatic and spoiled or if this was some form of..something

also here are my thoughts:

i just still love him a lot and i dont want him to be an enemy but everytime he gets close i get afraid and very tense (verbally i stfu and physically i cringe and pull away). i shut down. i end up being blunt and rude when i speak.

then i feel bad but then i feel like a bad daughter for it but i dont know whether i am protecting my self or being angsty unprecedentedly

its always been mixed signals. he painted my mama in a bad light SO much and it feels she never got the chance to raise me because i saw her as the bad guy and my dad took the spotlight as the parent "who actually cared" while she was the one who thought money bought happiness (she was the primary breadwinner majority of my life)

so now, how do i carry myself into adulthood then? i am very fearful of ending up with a man like him and im afraid of vulnerability in relationships (platonic and romantic, but ive never jad a romantic relationship heh); how do i not allow myself to get too close to people and remain detached?

im so confused i just want some adulthood wisdom. i know i csnt do this on my own.