u/VehicleSudden3636

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To all my readers, I am a 26 year old man and I have made some very immature mistakes in my life which ended up pushing the person I genuinely loved away from me

I am not making this post to paint myself as the good guy or her as the bad guy. We were both immature in our own ways. She was younger than me and because we were in a long distance relationship there were things she would do out of immaturity. Sometimes she would threaten to share private things or say things like she would tell my sister about something. I never used the same things against her. I would usually try to handle it calmly and explain to her why certain things were not okay and most of the time she would understand

But my own immaturity showed up in a different way. I was extremely possessive

I wanted her to myself and I had a hard time accepting the idea that when she went abroad she would naturally meet new people and build new friendships with both guys and girls. Looking back I understand that this was not fair. I had become so emotionally attached to her that I started seeing normal things as threats

The irony is that she had done similar things with me before. She had asked me to remove girls from my Instagram and other social media because she did not trust that I was only interested in her. And I did it because in my mind she was the only person I wanted. Even now I get approached by other women but emotionally I still don't feel interested in anyone else

When she went abroad things slowly changed. She became distant and eventually she left the relationship. At the time instead of trying to understand what she was feeling I went into a victim mindset. I kept thinking that she had abandoned me or betrayed me rather than understanding that she was probably scared that I would try to control her again and stop her from experiencing her new life

And honestly that is probably one of my biggest regrets

We never properly sat down and had a mature conversation about what our relationship would look like after she moved abroad. We both just reacted to things as they happened and eventually everything fell apart

I have thought about moving on many times but the truth is I don't want to pretend that I don't still have feelings for her. I genuinely love her and those feelings are still very strong

I also understand why she might not want to come back. She probably thinks that if she gives me another chance I will become the same possessive person again. And I can't blame her for thinking that because I gave her reasons to think that

So I am asking people here for genuine advice

Please don't just tell me to move on because I already know that is the easiest answer. I want to know if there is any realistic way to rebuild trust with someone who has completely distanced themselves from you because of your past behavior

There is currently no contact between us and I am not asking for some magical trick to make her come back. I just wish I could somehow get one opportunity to have a mature conversation with her and show her that I understand where I went wrong

I am willing to work on myself regardless of whether she comes back or not. But at the same time I don't want to give up on someone I genuinely still love without at least understanding whether there is anything I can do differently

Maybe someone here has been through something similar. Maybe someone made the same mistakes and eventually rebuilt a relationship. Maybe someone who has more life experience can tell me something I am not seeing right now

I know people here will have different opinions and I respect all of them. I am not looking for validation. I am genuinely looking for perspective

To everyone who reads this and takes the time to respond thank you. Whatever you are going through I genuinely wish you well and I hope life treats you kindly

Imagine holding your vital life force unbroken for eighty eight straight years, transmuting every drop of biological energy into raw spiritual sovereignty until the wealthiest rulers on earth knelt in the dust outside your cell. In a world currently obsessed with reaching thirty or ninety days of retention, the life of the sixteenth century Qadiriyya Sufi grandmaster Hazrat Mian Mir stands as the ultimate testament to what happens when a human being treats their seed as sacred nuclear fuel. Born in 1550 CE in lower Sindh, Mian Mir made a quiet decision in his youth that would echo through history. He embraced Tajarrud, absolute lifelong celibacy, choosing to never waste a single drop of his vital force. For nearly a century, he lived as an untouchable fortress of mental and physical power, demonstrating to the world that when a man masters his lower desires, the universe itself bends to his presence.

Mian Mir did not merely abstain from sex. He funneled that raw conserved vitality into physical and neurological feats that border on the impossible. Through the esoteric practice of Pas i Anfas, the continuous hyper conscious monitoring of every breath, he refined his nervous system to such a degree that he could slow his respiration down to just a few cycles per hour during deep contemplation, entering states of electric suspended stillness. He viewed excess sleep as a drain on man’s vital essence, abandoning beds entirely for decades and resting briefly upright against a wooden staff whenever exhaustion threatened to overtake his night vigils. This was not self torture, but the ecstatic hyper focused energy of a man whose biological reserves were perpetually overflowing, allowing him to operate on a cognitive and spiritual plane far above ordinary human existence.

The resulting aura of this eight decade transmutation was so intense that it paralyzed the arrogance of the imperial world. When Emperor Jahangir, the absolute monarch of the Mughal Empire, visited Lahore in 1620, he broke all court protocol to seek out the humble plain clothed saint. Overwhelmed by the crushing authority of Mian Mir’s silent presence, Jahangir offered him royal treasures and begged to fulfill any request the master had. Mian Mir looked at the most powerful man in India with total indifference and replied that his only desire was for the Emperor to leave him alone so he could return to his solitude. Years later, Emperor Shah Jahan brought chests of gold and titles to Mian Mir’s cell, only for the saint to point to a cup of water and a crust of dry bread, proving that a man who commands his own life force sits on a throne far higher than any worldly king.

This transmuted energy was not just a shield of personal power. It was an active force of physical and psychological transformation. When the royal heir, Prince Dara Shikoh, lay dying of a violent incurable fever that the empire’s greatest doctors had abandoned, Shah Jahan carried the bedridden boy to Mian Mir’s feet. The master took a simple vessel of water, projected his focused spiritual energy Tawajjuh into it, and had the prince drink. Dara Shikoh later wrote that the moment the liquid hit his throat, a cooling light surged through his veins, vanishing his terminal illness overnight and binding him to Mian Mir as a lifelong disciple. Even the wild predators of the jungle felt this unshakeable aura. During Mian Mir’s early years of solitary meditation in the dense forests of Punjab, venomous vipers and wild beasts would slither up and sit harmoniously around his body, their natural aggression completely dissolved by his atmosphere of absolute internal peace.

When his followers marvelled at these supernatural manifestations, Mian Mir dismissed them, teaching that physical wonders were merely side effects and that the only true miracle on earth is Istiqamat, unwavering unshakeable discipline over oneself. He warned that flying in the air or walking on water were cheap tricks compared to the supreme triumph of mastering one’s mind, preserving one’s breath, and keeping the heart anchored in the Eternal. For every man walking the path of retention today, Hazrat Mian Mir is the ultimate beacon showing what lies at the end of radical self control. He proves that retention is not about suppressing your nature, but about ascending it, transmuting raw lust into an unyielding light, building an aura that commands absolute respect, and claiming the true internal sovereignty that no amount of worldly wealth can ever buy.

Basic Details:

Age: 24

Height: 5’9”

Location: Pakistan (Currently completing Bachelor's; relocating to the UK for Master's & Career insha’Allah)

Marital Status: Never Married

Deen: Practicing (Alhamdulillah pray 5 times daily, value a halal and chaste lifestyle, non-smoker)

About Me:

Assalamu Alaikum! I am a grounded, family oriented, and ambitious individual. I was raised by wonderful, strong parents (father passed away 5 years ago) alongside four elder sisters—an upbringing that taught me deep respect, empathy, and appreciation for women.

Character and emotional maturity are very important to me. I believe everyone’s life experiences shape their perspective, so I approach people with an open mind and respect, without judgment. I am naturally loving towards children, deeply respectful of elders, and committed to being a supportive, loving, and fulfilling husband who honors his wife's rights in Islam.

In my daily life, I stay active through outdoor sports and going to the gym. I value personal growth, both spiritually and physically.

Education & Future Plans:

Currently finishing my Bachelor’s degree in Pakistan. My immediate roadmap involves moving to the UK for my Master’s degree and establishing my career there, insha’Allah.

What I Am Looking For:

I am seeking a practicing, sincere, and family minded Muslimah who:

Is ready to build a strong, peaceful life together based on mutual love, respect, and companionship.

If you feel our values align. May Allah SWT guide us all to what is best.

Asalamu Alaikum everyone

I am a 24M seeking sincere advice.

About a year ago, I met a girl on Instagram. Our relationship was entirely online, and over time we became very close. We had occasional arguments like any two people, but I never intentionally hurt her or mistreated her. We even spoke about marrying each other in the future. She was from the Ahl al-Tashayyu community, while I am Sunni.

Last year, she moved to Ireland for her Master's degree. After moving, she gradually became distant and eventually removed me from her life completely.

Recently, I was told by someone that she is living with Hindu girls and has started attending parties and clubs, and that she may even be drinking alcohol. I saw a video of her dancing in the club, it deeply disturbed me because I genuinely cared about her faith and well being.

I first sent her an email, asking her respectfully to be careful and reminding her of Islam. I received no reply. I then called her brother. I remained respectful throughout the conversation and did not insult or argue with him. I simply told him to stop her and advise her, and the people she's living with aren't good , I was concerned for her and hoped her family would advise her. He told me to stay away and said it was none of my concern. He asked me what is your sect, i only said that I am a Muslim who believes in Allah, follows the Prophet (ﷺ), and respect all Muslims. Then he again asked I mean are you a Sunni or what then I said it doesn't matter who I'm , I'm a Muslim.

Since then, I have stopped contacting them. The only thing I am doing now is making dua for her guidance.

My question is: From an Islamic perspective, have I fulfilled my responsibility by advising her once? Should I now completely leave the matter to Allah and move on with my life, or is there anything else Islam expects me to do? But a part of still caring for her. :(((

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It's currently 2:00 AM as I write this, and I honestly can't sleep because my mind keeps running in circles trying to make sense of something that happened earlier today.

Around Maghrib(Praying time for Muslims) , I was walking to my local mosque when an elderly, frail woman I had never seen before stopped me on the road. She looked at me and said, "Son, don't be worried. You are going to go very far in life. My prayers are with you." I was surprised because I have been carrying a lot of stress lately, even though I hadn't shared it with anyone. I thanked her and offered her a 100-rupee note, thinking she might need it, but she gently refused and said, "I don't need it. Give it to someone who is actually in need." There was something incredibly calm and sincere about her, and her words left me speechless for a moment.

I continued walking toward the mosque, and after about a minute, I suddenly felt the urge to turn around and look back at her. When I did, she was gone. What unsettled me is that the road was a long, straight stretch with excellent visibility. She had been standing near the center of the road, there were no nearby alleyways or open gates where she could have disappeared, and I didn't hear a car or motorcycle stop to pick her up. Considering her age and how slowly she appeared to move, I simply couldn't understand how she could have vanished from sight so quickly.

Now it's 2:00 AM, and I still can't get her face or her words out of my mind. Part of me feels comforted because everything she said was kind, hopeful, and encouraging. Another part of me, however, keeps searching for a logical explanation for what happened. I'm not trying to claim that anything supernatural occurred—I genuinely don't know. I just can't shake the feeling that the encounter was unusual, and it's left me overthinking ever since.

I need to get this off my chest because I feel like so many women have been conditioned to think that oral sex is a favor, a warm up, or something a guy just endures to get to the main event. Let me set the record straight. For a man who truly loves women, going down on you is not a generous act. It is a privilege. It is hands down the most intoxicating experience on this planet. There is nothing like the moment you slide down between a woman's legs, gently pull her to the edge of the bed, and feel the warmth radiating from her skin. It starts before my lips even touch her. It's the scent first, that warm, sweet, completely unique musk that tells me she's getting wet. Just breathing her in is enough to make my pulse race. Then comes the slow tease. I'll never understand guys who rush straight in like they're trying to win a race. The best part is the build up. Kissing the inside of her thighs, watching goosebumps spread across her skin, feeling her knees slowly part, and letting my warm breath brush against her until she shivers and instinctively lifts her hips without saying a word. Then comes that first taste. The warmth, the softness, the way she responds the moment I find the places that make her catch her breath, there's nothing else like it. I love the feeling of her hands finding my hair, gently guiding me at first, then holding on tighter as she loses herself in the moment. I love seeing her body react, her thighs trembling, her back arching, and hearing those involuntary sounds that tell me she's completely present. The most incredible part is watching her surrender to the pleasure, when all the tension melts away and she's no longer thinking about anything else. Knowing I could bring her to that place is deeply satisfying. And afterward, when she's lying there flushed, breathless, and smiling, I don't just move on. I like staying close, feeling the quiet aftershocks, resting beside her, and appreciating the intimacy we just shared. So to any woman who has ever felt self conscious or believed that asking for oral was asking for too much, please know that, to the right man, pleasing you with his mouth isn't a chore or an obligation. It's one of the most intimate, enjoyable, and meaningful ways to show desire, care, and appreciation. For the right person, there's nowhere else they'd rather be.

I'm in despair, friends.

I don't know why I'm so trusting. Maybe that's my biggest flaw.

I loved someone who promised she'd stay through everything, but she left. Later, when I was heartbroken, I opened up to someone I met here. I genuinely trusted her, never spoke badly about my ex, and just needed someone to listen.

She added me on Instagram, found my ex's account on her own, reached out to her, and shared things I had told her in confidence—even things I never said directly about my ex. Three months later, they're best friends.

More than losing people, it's the betrayal that hurts. It makes me question whether being kind and honest is just another way of making yourself an easy target.

Part of me wants them to feel the pain they caused me, but another part of me knows revenge won't give me the peace I'm looking for. Right now, I'm just trying to understand how to trust again after being betrayed twice.

I don't know why I'm this trusting. Maybe that's my biggest flaw.

I loved someone who promised she'd stay through everything, but she left. Later, when I was heartbroken, I opened up to someone I met here. I genuinely trusted her, never spoke badly about my ex, and just needed someone to listen.

She added me on Instagram, found my ex's account on her own, reached out to her, and shared things I had told her in confidence—even things I never said directly about my ex. Three months later, they're best friends.

More than losing people, it's the betrayal that hurts. It makes me question whether being kind and honest is just another way of making yourself an easy target.

Part of me wants revenge. I want them to feel the pain they caused me.

Any girl here who wants to help me? To add her(my ex) on insta to stalk them. I would be grateful.

I asked a tarot reader about my future spouse/long-term partner, and something interesting happened. The reader pulled the <Bold>3 of Wands</Bold> — then reshuffled and pulled again for clarification, and the <Bold>same card came up a second time</Bold>.

I’m curious what people here think that might mean.

The reader didn’t give a detailed explanation beyond saying it felt significant because the same card appeared twice. From what little I know, the 3 of Wands seems to be connected with waiting, future plans, expansion, travel, or someone coming from a distance, but I’m not sure how that translates to a spouse reading.

Has anyone else had the same card repeat in a relationship/spouse question? What would <Bold>3 of Wands appearing twice</Bold> suggest to you?

Same as above.

Hi everyone, I am seeking some astrological perspective on relationship transits and communication. I am a Virgo Ascendant (Moon in Capricorn) currently running my Rahu-Venus Mahadasha. With my Lagna Lord Mercury retrograde right now, I am feeling an incredibly strong internal pull to send a sincere, expectation-free apology email to an ex-partner to resolve some past misunderstandings. Her chart is Capricorn Ascendant (Moon in Aquarius) and she is currently in her Saturn-Saturn Mahadasha, living abroad in Dublin. Looking at the transits, transit Saturn is currently in her 3rd house of communication (Pisces) and exalted Jupiter is in her 7th house (Cancer). Meanwhile, my Lagna Lord is retrograde, which makes me feel very impatient, but I’m worried about the classic retrograde miscommunication traps. Do these placements suggest that sending a heartfelt, pressure-free apology email now will be fruitful, or does the heavy Saturn influence on her communication house mean I should wait until Mercury goes direct? I would deeply appreciate any insights on how our current dashas and transits align for this

Hi everyone, I am seeking some astrological perspective on relationship transits and communication. I am a Virgo Ascendant (Moon in Capricorn) currently running my Rahu-Venus Mahadasha. With my Lagna Lord Mercury retrograde right now, I am feeling an incredibly strong internal pull to send a sincere, expectation-free apology email to an ex-partner to resolve some past misunderstandings. Her chart is Capricorn Ascendant (Moon in Aquarius) and she is currently in her Saturn-Saturn Mahadasha, living abroad in Dublin. Looking at the transits, transit Saturn is currently in her 3rd house of communication (Pisces) and exalted Jupiter is in her 7th house (Cancer). Meanwhile, my Lagna Lord is retrograde, which makes me feel very impatient, but I’m worried about the classic retrograde miscommunication traps. Do these placements suggest that sending a heartfelt, pressure-free apology email now will be fruitful, or does the heavy Saturn influence on her communication house mean I should wait until Mercury goes direct? I would deeply appreciate any insights on how our current dashas and transits align for this

Any girl where who have good followers on Instagram and wants to help me please. It's a humble request.

Insights please.