u/Vereity123

21M trying to look my best but not really sure where to search. My friends think I look “fine” but thats not what I’m looking for. My parents obviously just lie to me to be nice so my options are like looksmaxxing forums or reddit where I get conflicting responses. I feel like there’s no ideal or “female gaze” to aspire towards in the sense of how to appeal to the type of women that I would want and to shape my appearance around it. Is there a reason for this and where can I get good feedback on my looks so I can become better than just average?

I’m almost 21 and I have never been in a relationship. This morning I got a tiktok saying that getting a girlfriend is so easy you just need to be kind and respectful to women and they will like you but I don’t really see this as the case. I don’t hate women at all I just kind of see how I mostly go about my day and don’t really get many positive interactions with women, they’re mostly neutral. But if something is so easy to get then something must be wrong with me I assume. My parents seem to want me to get one but I can’t really seem to. To be fair I just go to work go home play video games and go to the gym but I’ve been out in the city a few times and it doesnt seem to do anything. I don’t really judge that hard on appearance I think I’d like most people who expressed interest in me and would be down to go on dates with them.

I’ve struggled with insecurities for a while about my looks because I just don’t really get “quick” attention. I don’t think anyone has called me good looking thats not my family or friends so I sort of just feel like I blend in too much. I get envious and depressed a lot due to people who seem to be able to get it. Like sometimes when I go outside I sometimes fall into a random slump because I know many people saw me and I made no impression on them most likely. I try to work on my looks but all I get is “average”, never cute or handsome or something of the sort. I know I should probably expect that I’m not special but I really find it hard to break out of. I would say I want this validation more than a relationship but I would probably get it in a relationship. Is it unreasonable to one day want to be seen that way or should I just give up?

I’m almost 21 and have almost never been in a relationship. I keep hearing about how women date average guys all the time and sometimes unattractive ones so the only conclusion that is logical is that I am extremely unattractive. If this wasn’t the case I assume I would have had some interest / experience. I always hear that most men are ugly so I assume I also fall into that bracket. I also see a lot of posts talking about how some guys can easily get into relationships and its super simple especially in college for them but I can’t name one girl who has ever been interested in me. Is there another explanation for this?

I figured that I should probably get contacts. However, I absolutely hate things getting into my eye. For reference when I go to the optometrist and they put an eyedrop I start bracing against the chair and shaking a little bit. I absolutely hate anything going into my eyes and cant stand eyedrops at all. As such, I have no idea how contacts would ever work for me. Is there a way to deal with this or should I just wait for lasik? I also accidentally fall asleep a lot in bed and I heard you’re not supposed to sleep with contacts in

I(20M) matched with this girl yesterday and the first thing she tells me is that we went to middle school together and she remembers I was super mean to her. I feel like an asshole now

I’m trying to get some experience with dating since I’m almost 21 and have never been on one but seem to get limited results with dating apps. I don’t really have many pictures of me and don’t do a ton of stuff so I guess that makes my profile not great. I mostly just do school, work out, play games and watch anime. That being said, I feel like there is no simple fix for making my profile better, I would have to go out and get friends to take pictures for me and the such. Is there a reason why building a good profile is so hard?