What could it mean if a man 10 years older than me froze up, seemed shy, and started blushing when I gave him a sincere compliment?
I'm a happy, confident woman in my late twenties with a great job as a physiotherapist. Normally I have a good sense of how I feel and what to do with it, but recently something happened that I don't quite know how to handle.
I recently had surgery performed by an oral and maxillofacial surgeon, roughly ten years older than me. He was cool, direct and straight to the point — no small talk. I suspect he may be somewhere on the autism spectrum.
After a tragicomic incident, his attitude changed and he became more open and cheerful during the following appointments. From the moment he walked in, he would always make a little joke about what had happened. Because of this shift, I felt more free to be myself — energetic, playful and funny — and he visibly enjoyed it. It created a nice dynamic between us.
Verbally he always remained professional, but his body language sometimes gave him away. For example, awkward reactions when there was unexpected accidental physical contact. But what stuck with me most was this: when I honestly told him how I had experienced the whole process and thanked him for it, he just looked at me in silence, visibly flustered, while his cheeks turned completely red. That reaction got to me — how someone so experienced and level-headed could respond that way. I hadn't expected it.
The last appointment was several weeks ago now, but he's stayed on my mind. I find myself feeling sad that I'll probably never see him again, and private contact isn't really an option given his position.
It doesn't happen often that I feel this comfortable around a man. My question to you all: am I overanalysing this and was this simply his personality, or did he feel something too?
I'm 25, and I recently had surgery on my nose for medical reasons, performed by an ENT specialist who I estimate is just over 10 years older than me. I'd like some help making sense of the dynamic that developed throughout the consultations, because ever since yesterday's final consultation it's been stuck in my head.
During the first consultations he was ice cold. No smile, no small talk, purely professional. I adapted to that and kept things professional as well. I have a strong suspicion that he is somewhere on the autism spectrum. Just before the surgery I told him I was incredibly nervous, after which he reassured me. During the surgery I had packing placed in my nose to catch the bleeding, which meant I could only breathe through my mouth, and this led to panic attacks in the days that followed. Long story short: I ended up having them removed by my GP on a Sunday evening because I couldn't take it anymore, even though I already had an appointment with his assistant on a public holiday — an earlier appointment I had managed to get after calling multiple times. I still went to that appointment anyway, because a GP isn't a specialist and I wanted to make sure everything was okay. The assistant wasn't thrilled about having to come in on a public holiday, essentially for nothing. I apologized and explained my side of the situation.
Going into the next consultation with the ENT specialist, I was nervous, thinking he might be annoyed about what had happened with his assistant. But he laughed — for the first time — brought up the incident himself and found it amusing. Because he was more open, I could also be more myself. I'm naturally enthusiastic and I like bringing a bit of humor into a conversation. This created a fun dynamic. I also sincerely thanked him for the surgery and said something along the lines of: "During the first consultation you said you couldn't guarantee that the surgery would deliver the desired result, and I just genuinely want to thank you because I'm so glad I went through with it and that you were able to fix it." He didn't know what to say for a moment, there was a slightly too long silence, he held eye contact with me, and I thought I could read a shy reaction on his face along with a slight flush. After which he quickly moved on to a new medical question.
Yesterday was the final consultation. He came to get me from the waiting room with a smile, and while we were still in the doorway he immediately made a laughing remark about the packing — something along the lines that I certainly wouldn't be letting them put it in a second time. I also happened to be a bit more playful than usual because just before the appointment I had given a presentation that had been really well received. After he removed the last stitches from my nose, I laughingly asked him whether I needed another CT scan. He said that would be unnecessary radiation, to which I replied: "I just thought it would be fun to have a before-and-after photo." He laughed at that. Throughout the consultation I had the feeling he was trying to stay in his professional role, but that his body language sometimes gave him away. Whenever I said something that fell outside his standard script, he didn't quite know how to respond, became a bit clumsy, and awkwardly fell back on medical questions. It was my last consultation and I won't need to come back.
I genuinely felt a certain playful tension, a sense of him being charmed and disarmed, but I can't tell if I'm projecting. It's hard to put into words because it was mostly non-verbal — energy, body language, and dynamic.
I walked out with a strange but slightly euphoric or flattered feeling. Normally I don't read into these things, especially not with a doctor. But the shift from his initial coldness to what I felt yesterday was so stark and unexpected that it just stayed with me.
What are some possible explanations for this shift in his behavior?
How do you explain the shyness and blushing after the personal thank-you, or the awkward behavior? As a doctor, shouldn't he be used to receiving thank-yous, or talking to or touching young women? And how do I make sense of this dynamic?
To the doctors here: have you ever had a patient you instantly clicked with — positive energy — someone you feel completely comfortable around, and who you’re genuinely happy to see come back for appointments?
I'm 25, and I recently had surgery on my nose for medical reasons, performed by an ENT specialist who I estimate is just over 10 years older than me. I'd like some help making sense of the dynamic that developed throughout the consultations, because ever since yesterday's final consultation it's been stuck in my head.
During the first consultations he was ice cold. No smile, no small talk, purely professional. I adapted to that and kept things professional as well. Just before the surgery I told him I was incredibly nervous, after which he reassured me. During the surgery I had packing placed in my nose to catch the bleeding, which meant I could only breathe through my mouth, and this led to panic attacks in the days that followed. Long story short: I ended up having them removed by my GP on a Sunday evening because I couldn't take it anymore, even though I already had an appointment with his assistant on a public holiday — an earlier appointment I had managed to get after calling multiple times. I still went to that appointment anyway, because a GP isn't a specialist and I wanted to make sure everything was okay. The assistant wasn't thrilled about having to come in on a public holiday, essentially for nothing. I apologized and explained my side of the situation.
Going into the next consultation with the ENT specialist, I was nervous, thinking he might be annoyed about what had happened with his assistant. But he laughed — for the first time — brought up the incident himself and found it amusing. Because he was more open, I could also be more myself. I'm naturally enthusiastic and I like bringing a bit of humor into a conversation. This created a fun dynamic. I also sincerely thanked him for the surgery and said something along the lines of: "During the first consultation you said you couldn't guarantee that the surgery would deliver the desired result, and I just genuinely want to thank you because I'm so glad I went through with it and that you were able to fix it." He didn't know what to say for a moment, there was a slightly too long silence, he held eye contact with me, and I thought I could read a shy reaction on his face along with a slight flush. After which he quickly moved on to a new medical question.
Yesterday was the final consultation. He came to get me from the waiting room with a smile, and while we were still in the doorway he immediately made a laughing remark about the packing — something along the lines that I certainly wouldn't be letting them put it in a second time. I also happened to be a bit more playful than usual because just before the appointment I had given a presentation that had been really well received. After he removed the last stitches from my nose, I laughingly asked him whether I needed another CT scan. He said that would be unnecessary radiation, to which I replied: "I just thought it would be fun to have a before-and-after photo." He laughed at that. Throughout the consultation I had the feeling he was trying to stay in his professional role, but that his body language sometimes gave him away. Whenever I said something that fell outside his standard script, he didn't quite know how to respond, became a bit clumsy, and awkwardly fell back on medical questions. It was my last consultation and I won't need to come back.
I genuinely felt a certain playful tension, a sense of him being charmed and disarmed, but I can't tell if I'm projecting. It's hard to put into words because it was mostly non-verbal — energy, body language, and dynamic.
I walked out with a strange but slightly euphoric or flattered feeling. Normally I don't read into these things, especially not with a doctor. But the shift from his initial coldness to what I felt yesterday was so stark and unexpected that it just stayed with me.
What are some possible explanations for this shift in his behavior? And how do I make sense of this dynamic?
How can i post on reddit? I’m not able to do anything
Kent iemand dr. Neyt Peter in AZ Sint-Lucas te Gent?
Ervaringen met hem of andere nko artsen die je kan aanraden regio Gent?