u/Whatthefrick1

Okay guys. So after 9-10 months of this shit show, I’m done. I’ve had you guys following along the past few weeks so here’s a final update…

My last weekend will be tomorrow. I asked if I could stay over for the 3-11 so I can make extra holiday money before I leave. I was told by my house manager (mind you I had to chase her for a damn answer) that management is refusing to approve the shift due to my complaints about the staffing. Like ok so if I did stay, I would’ve been punished forever??? Now you guys have to find someone to work the holiday.

In that same conversation, she asked why I didn’t just talk to her first before escalating…..I literally did?? She was included in my initial email and I was told they would work on things. Now she’s telling me they will not give her an extra staff member…but someone is a documented 1:1??? I brought that up and she just repeated herself.

She told me we could’ve worked something out. She pointed out that she plans outings that she will be involved in (but she’s not clocked in). Except that doesn’t help bc I’m still loading the car up, walking them to the event, and then going home by myself. Plus she works full time + helps out with other outings during the week. How sustainable is that long term?? And even then, I’m still going on outings sometimes by myself.

I told her I would revoke the resignation. But after orientating at my new job…I don’t want to revoke it. I want a fresh start. And I don’t want to “thug it out” with her because it’s honestly just ridiculous. I’m close to calling state on them at this point because no fucking way they’re choosing to ignore someone who’s a 1:1 FOR SEXUAL BEHAVIORS. With school and my internship coming up, I’m choosing to protect my peace and sanity. Thank you everyone for your support throughout this

So I started as a home health aide. My first 3 clients are a dream. My fourth client is making me feel weird. I care for a 96 year old man. His daughter is a nursing supervisor and when I first started, she flew in from out of state. She was honestly nitpicking everything I did but I tried my hardest to be patient and make her feel more comfortable with me. I had her show me exactly what she wanted me doing so there would be no further issues.

One incident we had is with laundry. I’m only there 3 hours a day twice a week. I washed the sheets and the towels together and she suggested I split them up to dry so I did. I was sitting by the basement waiting for the dryer to stop when she came to find me and told me to make sure I’m waiting for the laundry so I can finish it before I go (????? Never left laundry before). I just said okay and continued waiting like I was. I put the towels in and before I had to leave (my company is strict about staying over) I took the towels out early and they were slightly moist. The daughter and I talked about it the next shift and we agreed that I’ll just split it up between the days. This was a month ago and no issues since

Ok but now the client won’t let it go. Every time he sees me gathering laundry he asks me if it’s dry. His sheets have never been not dried. I brought him to his bed to show him how I made it and to ask if it was okay before I left. He asked if it was dry again. I bit my tongue and said yes. Honestly, I’m going to be setting boundaries politely regarding this. A mistake was made a month ago, please let it go…

Guess it’ll be the end of my story here depending on which job I get. I was the person complaining about having to take 4-5 individuals out by myself. Shit started to go down which made me say fuck it. This past weekend, I was asked to go to another community event. The thing is, now there’s another added challenge. The individual using a walker is now on a laxative and having near accidents if he can’t get to a bathroom quick enough. Why should I be expected to keep everyone together and run everyone back and forth during an outing to the bathroom?? I fucking refused and documented why.

So come the end of my weekend shifts and my house manager relieves me. She sends out an email later indirectly calling me and another coworker out for missed activities. The coworker literally said the individuals refused to play board games bc they rather paint or something. She actually checked the documentation book the next day and then told me I had to notify her if an outing couldn’t be completed. Again, something that wasn’t taught to me when I started.

So with a job lined up, I finally quit. And she didn’t acknowledge it 🤷🏽‍♀️ I guess bc she’ll be the one coming in doing the hard work her damn self every weekend. Should’ve treated me better. I love my individuals. They really do remember DSPs in the past that treated them right or wrong. I know they’ll remember me and it makes me feel bad but I gotta prioritize myself.

It’s so hard for me to open up to other women. It really is. I feel like I don’t click with people. It’s this one girl I met in college a year ago and from our very first conversation, we just clicked. The chemistry was crazy. I’m not in love with her, I’m in a happy relationship. But it’s like I’m platonically fixated on her as a friend. I want her to be MY best friend and I want her to consider me her special person too. She always shows that she’s on my same level by telling me how much she loves and appreciates me and how it’s also hard for her to form friendships. She’s the only girl that really gets my mindset

I asked her if we could share locations. Not even in a weird way, I do it with other distant friends too just to feel close when we’re not together. She said she only does it with her best friends and I told her “oh, well you’re my best friend!” She just loved the message and moved on 😭💔 I get it, everyone has different thresholds of closeness but it made me want to immediately pull away and put my energy to other people

So my house manager and I took the men to a festival today with 2 other houses and their DSPs. We were all serving our clients lunch. I brought two individuals with me so I could supervise while they grabbed their food. My manager stayed back with our individual that uses a wheelchair.

Before I left, I offered to find out the options they have and to come back and get his order and then I would go back and get his plate. She said it was fine and to go ahead so I left with the other two men. I brought my plate back and everyone including other DSPs started eating their food.

My manager came back with the other guy’s plate and she said “___ You can’t eat until all your individuals have their food.” Literally in front of the whole table including my coworker.. It confused me because I literally offered to grab a plate for him and she told me it was fine..I’m confused as to whether she meant I had to wait for everyone to be served first or if I actually should’ve gotten a plate for him before eating?? But she literally told me it was fine??

So I brought it up again later because I was still confused. I explained that I did offer to bring him a plate and she just left it at that. So I’m still confused??? Like what did I just get called out for. Even my coworker was like WTF when the manager stepped away

The amount of outings! I already work everyday before I come into this job on the weekends but even before that, this was exhausting. Especially back before I spoke up and complained about being stuck with 5 clients by myself. All the individuals have outings throughout the week already and then every weekend I come in, there’s MORE to do. And they aren’t lowkey outings at least, it’s very crowded places that are just overstimulating for me in general and then I’m working on top of that? I’m tired of it.

They get the most excited when we go to the dollar store. They never even care for the outings the manager keeps planning and she knows that. ATP it just feels like anything just to be out of the house. Which can be achieved by low and leisurely activities like picnics in the park, the beach, or walks considering the fact there’s 3 elderly individuals

My manager also rarely communicates. We’re supposed to get shift assignments when we come in. She’ll text me 1-3 hours later telling me she’s coming in and we’re going somewhere. I despise her for that. Let people know in advance..

Okay so I agreed to stay Sunday this weekend all day past my shift (7-3) to supervise a dance the individuals are having. My manager asked me to stay over on Saturday too which I do want the money but I know my limits. I refuse to be the only person having to take 3-4 people out by myself AND it’s hot??? I’m gonna be sweaty, stressed, and irritable!

So I told her if there’s an outing planned then no! I’m not gonna overwork myself if you refuse to send me support when I ask for it