u/Yerimiesee

There's way too much context on this and is so specific I don't really want to say it all but lomg story short, I [20F] saw my [21M] long distance partner for the first time on Saturday and we ended up having sex. It was both of our first times.

We had talked about it beforehand, but then he said he might want to save himself for marriage. He'd then be sexual with me over text again and say he wants sex. Either way, I ended up buying condoms and he said I shouldn't bring them because we'd end up having sex but I bought them either way just to be sure. We're both super sexual with each other and I didn't really want to risk it.

I fucked up by buying them when he said I shouldn't and I really regret it. We made out and ended up having sex (he asked if I was sure and I asked him too), I put the condom wrong 3 times so sex didn't end up super great and I had to leave shortly after and we both felt really bad.

I kept apologizing because I felt bad about him wanting to wait til marriage and then him wanting sex with me there, plus the moment maybe wasn't as magical as it would've been if we waited. I've been apologizing since then and he told me he felt frustrated I did buy condoms because he knew we'd end up being intimate.

He just made some jokes about me "forcing him" to have sex, he's just being silly and he says he's fine now but those jokes aren't funny to me. I was SA'd as a kid and these jokes make me feel like a rapist. I wish he would've told me he was uncomfortable in the moment or said he didn't want sex instead of agreeing and doing it. It's also confusing because he keeps talking about how good it felt and how we need to do it again.

Am I overreacting for being upset at these jokes? It was also my first time, and now I just feel like shit. But I feel really guilty about buying the condoms when I just wanted to make sure nothing unprotected happened.

Recently learned about ROCD because of the discourse about Olivia Rodrigo having it. I love her music and have always identified with a bunch of her songs about relationships.

I have diagnosed General Anxiety Disorder and Social Anxiety, so I don't know if how I feel in regards to relationships is linked to my anxiety or could be OCD.

I'm not currently "officially" dating my partner (basically a situationship lol) but we've been together for a while and we both don't date other people.

1. I think of every single thing he has said about his ex a few times a week (not much, I don't even know how she looks. I just know her name, how they broke up, where she lives)

2. Some days, when I dont feel head over heels with him I google things like "how to know if I'm in love" and related stuff.

3. I mentally count the hours he isn't replying to my messages.

4. Even if he says romantic things to me, I overthink the wording of them and wonder if he might mean something else.

5. I constantly worry about my future with him and go down a rabbit hole of trying to find ways to fix problems we're not even faving right now.

6. I don't know if I should be embarrassed over this but I've used Hinge to look at people and try and figure out if other people like me/if there's someone who might be "a better fit" for me. Even when I don't want to date someone else or even flirt.

I'm trying to find an affordable foundation and I've seen a lot of people on tiktok recommend the both of them but I don't know which one to buy:/

The weather in my city is very hot and my skin is normal, I don't get much acne. I don't know which one to pick or if there's a better foundation, I'd love to hear any review from these foundations!!:)

Spent a whole year of my life dating (non officially because he said he wasn't ready and needed me to give him time to be, but wanted me and loved me🥺) a guy #lol

He broke up things twice. He used to be distant random weeks like every 2 months. I isolated myself from friends and family because no matter how shitty I felt, I didn't want anyone to hate him because he was "trying."

He made me wait and wait and wait, always with an excuse. Always with the right words when I asked for commitment or to just leave me alone. Genuinely thought he loved me because of the "effort" he was putting on.

He broke up things again last month but only for a week because I broke no contact. We were acting like a couple again for another month, but after some weird fights, I couldn't take it anymore.

Broke up with him yesterday and asked him what the difference was between a official relationship and what we had and he said "he wasn't putting even as half the effort he would as if we were in a relationship and was comfortable like that"

I truly believed he was just avoidant, and he made me think that. So if this helps anyone: he/she is probably not that into you and just comfortable with everything you offer them. The whole avoidant stuff is just an excuse they're putting, and you're buying.

They don't care as much as you, and even if they call it love, it's not. They're losers who don't deserve how much effort and love you're putting into them. They most likely won't ever change and won't try for you.

Break up with them and live your life. I'm hurt but can't describe how much him saying that just vanished most of the love I had for him.

If you have to stay with them a little longer just so you can be at your limit and not ever want to be with them again, do it. But genuinely, please don't stay for long and don't hold into the hope you have with the potential you see in them.

Also fuck you Taylor. You'll never get someone as patient and loving who stays with you even if you hurt them like no one else did. You're a bitch.

I'm 20F and a virgin (really important context lol) I'm kinda going through a breakup, and since it was long distance we never had sex. I've been offered casual sex before, but it icked me out since idk I kinda have to have an emotional connection to consider it or even be able to feel aroused.

But now I don't know when that instance will happen (me feeling an emotional connection strong enough) and a lot of my friends have casual sex.

Should I consider it? is it worth it? am I too old to still be a virgin and should just consider doing casual to experience it?

I'm 20F and dating this one guy 21M in long distance. Not really dating rn? I guess we broke up a month ago because he got his passport, and I asked to get a date on when he's going to see me, but the conversation ended on up breaking up. He said he wasn't always sure of dating because he's scared of getting hurt like he did on his last relationship (7 years on and off, long distance too, ended because she cheated in him a few times)

We've known each other for a year now. Had already broken up after 3 months of talking. I guess it's not really breaking up since we were never 'official', but we did everything like a couple, so I guess I'll just call it that.

There's a lot of other situations I could list. Sometimes, he'd be avoidant for a few days but assured me it hadn't anything to do with me, whenever we had important conversations about me needing commitment from him he'd say he was doing everything to come here and ince we were in person we could make it official.

I feel like a lot of times I bent over backward for him. I love him so much, I had never felt so much about a person. When it's good it's so good and I know it's one of those phrases people say but I swear it's true. He listens to me and notices small stuff, he gave me a lot of gifs, introduced me to his mom, etc. We laugh so much and have interests in common.

Everything seemed perfect for a while until we broke up last month. I broke no contact after just a week and we've been talking again. Like a couple.

We fought (kinda) in the morning about me asking if we were just doing whatever and told him if he knew that if we're just doing whatever it means we're not exclusive. Besides a lot of stuff, he said he kinda felt like it was weird of me to start that conversation since when we broke up we (he) decided we wouldn't talk anymore and then I 'lured him in???' Again after calling him once (that started us talking again.

Edit here: also after I apologized and stuff like that he just said "you're so pretty" and changed the conversation. That made me so confused because I thought we were in one those conversations where you decide to break up or not????

Anyway, I don't know what to do. I'm so heartbroken. Please don't tell me to just find self-respect because I know I need it probably.

Is there any possibility he might change? do guys ever change in situations like this? it's just so hard to leave because I already accepted so much and waited for just the chance to see him. Or it's just confusing because he says that we're over and then come back to treat me like his girlfriend and tell me he loves me. I know that if we did see each other in person, he'd see things could be easier. We get along so well.

Is waiting ever worth it?? or how I even get over something like this?

Again, please just be kind:( I've already heard mean stuff coming from some of my friends, I just need to hear someone else's experience.