u/addi_vil

I am 21 years old. I am a grown woman but for some reason I get sad and emotional so easily. And It’s not in a way that it just slightly upsets me, every little sad thing that happens to me/that I saw or witnessed has me full on bawling my eyes out during the day and especially at night when I am trying to sleep.
Other people my age seem to cope with these common upsetting things that just happen to you during life so much better than I do. I can See that they are sad about these things too, but it seems like they recover from it way more gracefully.
I have tried to be tougher and have more edge but I am filled with all of these overwhelming emotions and even if I manage to act like the sadness doesn’t get to me in the end it always does anyway.
As soon as I see or hear of any suffering, no matter who, I get so upset and sad for them that I can’t function for a good few minutes and It’s so so stupid.

What can I do to be stronger? I don’t want to be sad all the time, especially about things that are out of my control. How do I fix this?

I am in my 20s, studying to become a Doctor.
I knew since early on that I don’t want children. The point of not wanting to become a parent isn’t the issue though, thats just the way I chose to live my life and I am very insistant on this decision.

(Before you read the rest of this post please keep in mind, that it is impossible to visit a therapist or psychiatrist where I live rn so going to therapy is sadly not an option)

My fear of pregnancy and childbirth in itself have gotten way worse over the last few years though. It is a genuine fear that keeps me from Intimacy with my partner because I am so scared that something goes wrong and I may get pregnant. There were times where it got so irrational, that I refused to even kiss him because I was afraid that through some sort of sick miracle he would impregnate me with his saliva (mind you, I am working in healthcare. Logically I know that this is not possible but the fear becomes so overwhelming sometimes). He is very patient with me and never makes me feel like a burden, but I feel so bad about it.

The other issue is how it affects my professional life.
I really want to become an OBGYN once I finish my studies. One might see the issue here.
During my Internships I often had patients that came in with either already ongoing pregnancies, a pregnancy-wish or because they wanted a blood drawn pregnancy test. Seeing the fetuses on the ultrasound machine or even feeling the babies kick on women in later trimesters made me feel physically sick. I once got to shadow the midwives while treating a patient in labor and I had to leave after like 10 minutes.
It has gotten so bad, that I can’t even see Babies as human anymore. Not in a way where I would get violent towards one, but in way that they scare me so much, in a way that an alien or something supernatural would.
This is so stupid, I can‘t even tell anyone about it cause everyone just laughs at me or calls me dramatic cause who tf is scared of Babies, right?

But all the tearing, the little naked being ripping through the womans body, being covered in blood while screaming - it frightens me.

Does anyone know how to handle this? How can I overcome this fear? I know that I luckily won’t have to be a mom, but even other peoples Babies scare me. What do I do?

I am actually so mad. It has happened one too many times now that I went onto literally any social media platform and got greeted with a video of girls asking why women only spaces have to be child-friendly too. In my mind this is a genuinely good question because yes, why are we as women, JUST BECAUSE WE ARE WOMEN, automatically expected to be good with children, a safe space for children and to be able to tolerate them just because? Men get their little spaces and free time all the time, even their restrooms are childfree. The whole concept of women bringing little boys into the female restrooms or men entering
The womens restrooms with their daughters instead of building familyfriendly ones actually pmo because why is our comfort always second to the needs of people who chose to recreate? Why are we always expected to be understanding towards mothers who put themselves into the shit Position they are in. Mothers have ALWAYS complained about how ass the job of being a mother is and these folks still decide to go through pregnancy and motherhood just to complain afterwards. And when you decide to complain about their dumbwitted lifepaths that puts everyone around them in misery because somehow they always feel entitled to everyone catering their needs you are called antifeministic and a misogynist.
„You can’t be a feminist without supporting mothers and children 🤓“ Stfu, have none of these people Seen what happens to women all around the world? And they still decide to put more people onto this planet? They still decide to give these men the power over their bodies? To ruin their lives over men wanting their DNA being carried out? And then they decide to Call people that simply want a minute of Peace and quiet from THE Single most overstimulating beings on the planet antifeministic? While they still give their bodies to men?
You can’t convince me that supporting motherhood in any way under our current system is not the single most misogynistic thing possible.
Hell no.

I (20F) have a boyfriend (20M) that is absolutely amazing. He cooks for me, never lets me pay, plans dates, surprises, brings flowers and is overall so careful and soft with me. He is so sweet in a way that nobody treated me before and I am just really cold. Idk what to do about this, I feel so ashamed when I have to show emotions to anyone irl whether It’s joy, sadness or love. And It’s not only that I can not show them - I barely even feel them. Like I feel negative emotions so much more intensely but when it comes to positive feelings they‘re just really dull if that makes sense? What do I do guys? Is there something wrong with me? I‘d be devastated if he was gone but why can’t i feel as deeply when he‘s here loving me so loudly? I want to be a good girlfriend, I want to make him feel good too but I don’t know how. As I said I have this issue with showing feelings, I have no skills that are useful to him and I am not interested in physical intercourse.
I sometimes try to be soft but it feels so forced. What can I do to be a good partner without fully changing who I am? Why has he been staying with me for so long?

Idk guys, sorry for the yap :,)

TLDR: I am emotionally fucked up and my boyfriend still loves me. Why does he do that, how do I become better and is there something wrong with me?

I (20F) always knew that I don’t want to have children. The thought first occured to me when I was 8 years old.
I always knew that I want to live my life on my own terms without that kind of responsibility, that I want to travel, climb the career ladder, do all kinds of sport and plan my day according to my needs.
Childbirth and Pregnancy are also my personal nightmares. I have a genuine fear of them.
Another Point is that I find children insanely annoying. Not in a way that I would harm them or be mean to them ofc but I simply don’t like having them around me.
Today I started wondering why people actually feel the Need to have children. Most people answer with stuff like „because It’s the biggest joy in life“ or that It’s the only unconditional love but these kind of answers are so vague and in my opinion not necessarily true. Are there any people that have actually thought about this, about all the struggles and possible complications and still decided that they want kids? What is your guys reason behind that ? I am genuinely interested so please don’t take this the wrong way guys

EDIT: I am new to Reddit so idk if everyone will see this but there are so many kind answers on here, thank you guys! :)
Thanks for giving me some insight into why you chose your paths and (at least most of you) being so lovely about it.
I wish all the best to you folks and your kiddos and the most health to all of you who are pregnant rn, may everything go well 🙏
This ofc was not an attempt to figure out if I want kids or not - I am very set on my choice - but listening to others decisions and why they made them about something you yourself did not choose gives you a glimpse of the „other side“ yk? I was really just wondering and didn’t mean to offend or judge anyone, sorry if it sounded like that. But as I Said - the majority of you has been so nice!

I bought my Asus Vivobook when I started my university degree for moderate use. Up until now I only used it for some Java assignments or to have a second screen at hand since I was mainly using my IPad but now that I have to use it a bit more frequently I noticed just how awful the battery life is.

It barely lasts 3h (when it was advertised with a capacity of 6-12h) and I already turned on any setting that would improve the battery life but nothing really works. I thought about getting the battery replaced but I already heard from other users that getting another one from Asus resulted in the same problem.

Does anyone know if I could build in a battery from another brand? and if so, what brands have the best batteries?