r/FeminismUncensored

My post was deleted my mods on a different feminist group so hopefully it’s okay to post here.

This may be a long post, sorry!

Someone online made a post that they want to be a ‘trad wife’, the comments were filled with people saying it’s anti feminist, the post sets women back years etc.

I made a comment saying something along the lines of; I always viewed feminism as the advocation of women’s freedom to choose, including the right to choose a traditional marriage if they so wish. We are so blessed that we can make decisions for our own lives. I personally cannot wait until I’m married, ridiculously in love and raising a family.

Obviously I had many replies saying choice feminism isn’t actually feminism etc. so i clarified my stance with a comment saying: just so I’m clear, I also cannot wait to own a house with my future partner, work a little part time job that I adore alongside raising a family.

Someone replied explaining feminism is focused on trying to get women out of the patriarchy, which we live in, and that just being a choice feminist won’t change anything. They then explained that most of my thoughts are rooted and influenced from social standards. And then told me I need to look at it in a deeper way as a whole.

Please correct me if I’m wrong or ignorant but surely belittling my own decisions about my future based on the idea that I’m programmed or brainwashed is discrediting that I can think for my self? Surely focusing on what modern women decide for themselves is less progressive and productive than using feminism to educate people about what is actively happening to women in other countries such as Afghanistan?

I guess I just want an easy life with someone I love, and that does include a marriage and things maybe not everyone values? I would love to stay at home and raise my children and spend my days cooking, my hobbies etc. why it is wrong for me to want that?

Please I’m only after educating myself here, please don’t be mean to me, maybe I have the wrong idea and concept.

EDIT: just so I’m clear I don’t want to be a trad wife, before I get married I fully intent to work and make my own money and buy a house. I only wanted to reach out and learn more about feminism.

Quite a few comments have been harsh, if I’m reaching out to a group for feminism and women I would have thought people would be willing to educate/ share their side of opinions. It may be clear that I didn’t know the definition or even the difference between a stay at home wife or a trad wife but at least I’m trying to educate myself. Anyways, thank you to everyone who answered, really appreciate youuu!

can somebody explain how i have it if being male just feels like a burden? like you are expected to suppress your emotions and people try to force you into being dominant, violent, aggressive, and masculine even if that is not who you are. and if they manage to force you into that you will just have toxic masculinity (which i think is real and its stupid that men are forced into it) so it just feels like you are trapped in a box where people hate you no matter what you do. im not saying that women's struggles aren't a real issue because they definitely are (especially historically), im just saying that male (i dont even want to say "men's" because it sounds like a slur to me now😭) issues also matter a lot. like if somebody just says "hey man" or "hey bro" i actually hate it because it triggers this negative association that my brain has made with that kind of stupid bro culture. i will INTENTIONALLY never call people bro, dude, man, etc because i just find it so stupid. and also the expectations on appearance are atrociously annoying like no i do not want to have a masculine jawline or short "clean low maintenance" hair or a ton of disgustingly thick body hair everywhere. like if i had to look like that i would feel devalued and disconnected from myself. and i don't want to go out and constantly try to date women or approach them. tbh wtf is "approaching a woman" supposed to mean, like that just sounds bizarre to me, why is it not something else like the way its phrased is just suspicious.

Hi everyone! Click the link to read my article on the red pill! Thank you in advance for reading :)

I posted on my story on insta the findings of Dr. Sara Meger (2026) in her Misogyny, Online Radicalisation, and Youth Extremism in Australia. Research Report. The University of Melbourne.
And suddenly all these boys ran to my dms to tell me those stats were “fake” etc etc
Why do men feel the need to do this! Why do these boys feel determined to diminish a study conducted by someone with a Doctorate?

The patriarchy is a power structure and like all power structures fundamental rely on balance between freedom and security. Historically women have benefited from increased security and men have benefited from increased freedom. The historical reason for the roles ending up this way is mostly to do with how each gender views risk and the value society places on people of that gender, a woman’s life traditionally being more valuable because of the ability to raise and nurture children. This rigid structure was and still is appealing to a lot of women because it not only gives a clear sense of purpose and an easy way for a lot of woman to feel like they are doing there role to better society but also that security that the patriarchy offers is very enticing to young women who live in such uncertain times. The patriarchy is and always has been a compromise between men and women that both sides agreed to and continue to uphold either because of familiarity or because of a fear of the unknown.

One of the most effective ways to naturalize a norm is to make it appear ancient and inevitable. Women have always worn makeup. Women have always wanted to be beautiful. That's just the way it is.

None of that is true. Let's look at what actually happened.

Men wore makeup too — until they decided not to.

From 4000 BC to the 18th century, men wore makeup on a daily basis. In ancient Egypt, both sexes lined their eyes with kohl. In China, during the Zhou dynasty, the word “mei” (beautiful) referred to the beauty of both sexes, and white face powder first became popular among men and boys during the Han dynasty. In 17th- and 18th-century Europe, upper-class men and women alike used lead-based cosmetics to whiten their skin, elaborate wigs, and various forms of facial adornment.

Then, at the end of the 18th century, something decisive happened. Men declared that ornate clothing and cosmetics were too “effeminate” and decided that beauty routines should be left to women. This is now historically known as the **Great Male Renunciation**. British psychologist John Flügel, who coined the term in 1930, argued that men had “abandoned their claim to be considered beautiful” and “henceforth aimed at being only useful.”

Men decided that beauty was beneath them and left it to women.

The feminization of makeup was neither natural, nor biological, nor ancient. It was a deliberate cultural decision made at a specific historical moment, for specific ideological reasons tied to Enlightenment ideas about rationality, utility, and masculine virtue.

While the Great Male Renunciation blurred class distinctions, it simultaneously reinforced gender stereotypes. Usefulness became masculine. Ornamentation became feminine. And femininity became obligatory — for women.

Early modern Europe: the double bind was already explicit.

Even before the Renunciation, the patriarchal logic of makeup was openly stated, rather than hidden behind the language of empowerment or self-expression.

In Renaissance Italy, a society that openly questioned women's worth and restricted their ability to earn a living based on their beauty, women were forced to rely on their appearance to demonstrate their value and secure their economic future.

In a society that condemned women both for being considered plain and for adorning themselves, wearing makeup became an act of economic survival.

The trap was already fully constructed: don't wear it and be seen as plain and unworthy; wear it and be accused of deception and vanity.

“Everyone hates to see makeup on his wife,” declared a character in a 1433 Renaissance treatise on the family, “but no one seems able to prevent it.”

Irony, right?

The 20th century: the industry manufactured the norm on a massive scale.

At the beginning of the 20th century, makeup was only worn by actresses and prostitutes.

The norm that seems timeless and universal to us today was, just over a hundred years ago, exclusively associated with women of “questionable morals,” to use the terminology of the time.

What changed was not an organic cultural evolution. What changed was capital.

The commercial cosmetics industry experienced its first major growth at the beginning of the 20th century. Through published information, women were told, over the four decades between the 1910s and the 1950s, that exercise, diet, and the proper use of cosmetics could make them more attractive.

The industry did not respond to a demand. It created it.

Helena Rubinstein, one of the founders of the modern beauty industry, built her empire explicitly on women's insecurities. She developed products based on women's physical insecurities, such as anti-aging creams.

A 1943 Helena Rubinstein advertisement implied that a woman who neglected her beauty routine might face infidelity.

Not art. Not self-expression.

An explicit threat: fix your face, or lose your husband.

The millionaire credited with the phrase “There are no ugly women, only lazy ones” lives on through L'Oréal, the current owner of the Helena Rubinstein brand.

The ideology of the industry's beginnings is still the ideology of the industry.

What this history actually shows

The makeup norm as it exists today is not ancient. It is not natural.

It is the product of a specific historical sequence: men voluntarily leaving ornamental culture and turning it into an obligation for women; a patriarchal economic system that made women's appearance their primary currency; and a commercial industry that transformed that insecurity into a global market worth hundreds of billions of dollars.

At every stage, the logic was stated openly.

Women must correct their faces to have value.

A woman's value lies in her physical appearance.

Women who don't do it are lazy, plain, unprofessional, or at risk of losing their man.

There are no ugly women, only women who haven't worked hard enough on themselves yet.

The idea that “it's just a personal choice” is the most recent layer.

It's also the thinnest.

Manosphere figures like Andrew Tate, Joe Rogan and Jordan Peterson aren’t just telling men how to treat their girlfriends or train for MMA fights; they’re also blasting their listeners with climate denial talking points. Which isn’t a coincidence. The fossil fuel industry has known since at least the 1990s that certain types of men are more susceptible to climate disinformation than other segments of the public. We take a look at how climate denial has seeped into the manosphere, how those messages are shaping men’s views of the climate crisis, and how the results are playing out at the ballot box.

Every time when I see loving fathers who are so sweet and caring with their little children or babies I find that so adorable to see but at the same time I feel something is lacking. No matter how great or loving a father is, he can never be compared to a mother. Mothers just have something and I don’t know what it is, fathers just can’t replace mothers or motherly love. There is something so special about a motherly love and I don’t know what it is or how to explain it. When I used to be depressed or had difficult times as both a child and adult I always went to my mom for comfort and every time when she comforted me or gave me a hand I suddenly felt calm and better. My father could never have that affect on me, no matter how close we were. I’m not saying that fathers are unimportant or not loving, both parents are equal but there is just something about mothers that fathers don’t have and I don’t know what it is. When my dad passed away I cried but when my mom passed away I cried and screamed, I was very hysterical and I’m still in denial that she is gone.
Even writing this makes me emotional. There is just something about mothers. Cherish every moment you have with them while you can cause you never know when you will lose them. Love and respect mom & dad equally!

I know this is probably a bit of a controversial opinion, but I actually think we should be more accepting of women cheating.

I think we should be more open to the idea that women can have sexual needs and desires that don't always fit perfectly into a monogamous relationship. It doesn't necessarily mean she doesn't love her partner, or that there's something seriously wrong with the relationship.

Women have been told for a very long time how they're supposed to behave sexually. So I actually think it's a good thing if we move towards a culture where women can follow their desires without automatically being looked down on or called selfish or disloyal.

I also think we should get better at separating sex and love. If a woman loves her partner but has sex with someone else, why does that automatically mean that her feelings for her partner aren't real?
And honestly, if a woman cheats, I think people should try to understand it instead of just judging her. Maybe she's been curious, missing something sexually, attracted to someone else, or just wanted to try something new. I actually think that's pretty human.

Personally, I have a hard time seeing why women cheating should automatically be viewed as something negative. I actually think it could be a good thing if women had a bit more freedom to explore their sexuality, even if that means having sex outside their relationship.

I'm curious if anyone else sees it the same way? Is this something we should be more okay with, or is it just me?

see question

If we as women are supposed to wear bras, men should too. Do you like seeing men’s nipples through their shirts? Why is this not an equal standard?

Hi everyone, Lucia here from EUobserver. We interviewed Ukrainian frontline reporter Diana Bucko about something I thought this community might find particularly interesting: what happens to war reporting when the war stops feeling “new” to the audience.

She’s been reporting from Ukraine’s frontline since 2022. She describes how the job has changed dramatically, from the stories journalists tell to the risks they're willing to take.

Drones have made the frontline considerably more dangerous. Many male journalists have joined the army or been mobilised, so frontline reporting is increasingly being done by women. And after four years, she says one of the hardest things is simply finding new ways to tell a story that audiences have already seen hundreds of times.

Meanwhile, the war hasn't become any less real for the people living it.

How do journalists deal with that gap between the importance of a story and declining audience attention?

Would be really interested to hear from you :)

Sure, this subreddit has been quite... Absent recently, although, I will reassure all my members that this community will continue! Men are targets of SA as well, men are stereotyped to hide emotions compared to sharing emotion, and men are definitely the targets of prejudice. Some might say that the men pointing this out after feminism began are just the few men trying to grab attention but guess what! Men also had problems just like men and if you didn't know the statement feminism is for everyone doesn't actually work in practice because it's specifically focusing on women's rights to the point they kept on accidentally taking some of the men's rights while protesting which are actually fair! So this community is needed until the equality for men is in movement as well!

If you want to support this movement, go ahead! Feminism is about helping women's rights while masculinism is about helping men's rights, together the world can obtain equality, so I do suggest helping this community grow.

Not hating or judging, just genuinely very curious. I don’t see the pros here. My last ex almost pushed me to the brink of asexuality.

Dick isn’t even very good, I can pleasure myself much better. Most men are very boring. They repeat previous conversations when they run out of what to talk about. They give empty promises and fake their personalities for months so they can rush you into sex. A lot of them don’t have good hygiene. They don’t have a nurturing or gentle side and if they do they suffocate it with porn and other addictions.

A lot of them do not desire to be fathers, they will just say “yeah, I want a kid one day” as if they were thinking of getting a puppy. Way too many of them don’t know how to clean properly. Their cooking skills are at a “I can make a hotdog” level. And they will look you straight in the eye and tell you they don’t know how to turn on the fucking washing machine.

They will tell you what to wear and how much they hate whores and then pay them subscriptions behind your back. They will lie to you like a toddler, “I didn’t shit my pants!” while the diaper is sticking out and stinking, you know what I mean? Like why? Why would a girl with a degree, ambitions and purpose embarrass herself so much with a man wearing jorts and a t-shirts with a gaming print by her side? Baffles me so much. 

You won’t see me chasing a man out in the wild, that’s for sure. If I wanted someone simple in my life, I’d just get a dog. He will be more loyal and won’t force me to have sex because it’s “men’s needs”.