u/fay132

I’m 18F and I’ve been dealing with IBS since I was 12 years old. However it seems to be getting significantly worse. On Friday, I took four vegetable laxatives. Stupid me thought vegetable laxatives would be more gentle.

Oral laxatives of all kind cause severe stomach upset and the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my entire life, even if I drink 60oz of water with the laxatives.
The other kind.. well they hurt my butt.

Anyways. I woke up at 5am on Sunday to horrible stomach cramping. I went to the toilet and could barely go. I took zofran for nausea and bentyl to hopefully help relieve some of the pain.

Around 9am I woke up, throwing up completely undigested food from the night before. And I mean terrible pain to the point I was in tears. I had to go to the ER for iv pain meds and nausea medicine. I’m still recovering and barely being able to eat.

Does anyone else have any advice? I’m on probiotics and fiber supplements already. I don’t know what else to do and I genuinely can’t live like this.

I feel like before I was actually groomed and forced into hurting myself, I romanticized being with an older man and being loved because I had rather bad daddy issues. I now realized I just wanted fatherly love. I’m still in a relationship with an older man, but it is no longer illegal and I’m not being groomed or taken advantage of. Any older man who wants to be with a younger girl doesn’t love you. I’m 18 now and realize how dumb I was. My boyfriend still provides me with fatherly love somewhat and I look up to him a lot. The difference now is that I’m not being forced to hurt myself, it’s legal, and I’m not being groomed into doing disgusting things for an old man I barely even really knew. I hope someone out there reads this and realizes that there’s nothing romantic about an old man wanting to be with someone so young because they can’t find anyone their own age.

So I got banned for an inauthentic account, maybe because I gained 300 followers in less than a month? Either way it seems like a lot of people are experiencing it these past few hours.

I’ve watched all the videos of boar cleaning but nothing could’ve prepared me for this. I never been able to open their sack and get everything out, but my mom was able to. My one pig had a lot of white stuff and a little bit of hay. Is that normal? The other one had a bit of poop and bedding in it which I assume is mostly normal. I was able to clean it out but not good.

I have a lot of ptsd from what happened almost two years ago now. Basically my groomer was trying to force me to end it and I told one of my friends who thankfully found my IP address and called in a wellness check. Unfortunately, the cop that came to my house handled the fact I was actively In crisis VERY poorly.

I tried to lie to them because I didn’t want my parents to know I was being forced to hurt myself or groomed by a man who was four years older. (he was actually around 10 yrs older and lied) I did admit that I was in crisis but they had left and told my parents to keep an eye on me. In hindsight, this doesn’t feel legal.

The cops left my house, but the friend who originally called in the report told them to go back to my house because I was being groomed and forced to hurt myself by a man much older than me. They tried to take my phone but I erased it out of panic. They told my parents what the online friend had told them. They AGAIN told my parents to keep an eye on me and left again.

After this, I tried to end my life. The details are blurry but I was taken to the hospital. I’m not sure if my groomer ever really went to jail since he lived in a different country. The police also tried to charge me for “wasting their time”, not sure the official charge though.

Long story short, I have terrible ptsd and think the cops will knock at my door again and arrest me for something I didn’t do. I have paranoia about it as well. Police sirens and even their presence doesn’t make me feel safe, it makes me feel worried.

It feels conflicting being finally 18. I’m really happy that groomers will no longer ever want me again, I’ll never be taken advantage of in the way I was. I won’t be forced to hurt myself or forced to do things I never wanted to do in the first place. A part of me is sad. I wish I had my innocence from my childhood. I was a victim of CSA, and then groomed in my teenager years. I wish I could go back and be a normal kid again. I wish I could tell myself to wait and that those people don’t truly care about you. I wish I could tell myself that I would regret every single message in the future and that it would get me into SO much trouble with my parents. I turned 18 literally six days ago and I still feel like a child. I still feel the same as I was when I was 12, just more jaded and depressed.