I'm 15 and a slut lol, I've been talking to these people since I was 11, I never learn. something horrible happened to me once I was blackmailed into doing awful things and didn't want to go online for months bc ig I kinda get trauma, but later I spoke to one of them anyway. I’m literally such an idiot lol.
im stupid and care more about my interests, i don't want my groomer to start liking the things I like, mameshiba is getting popular and i've been a fan for a year or two now, and before it got popular, i tried talking about it with them, they didn't care or liked it, but NOWWW that its popular, i bet they're going to start liking it, im so so so angry, how do i avoid this
Sometimes I feel like I am missing out on what it should have felt like to not have experienced R or SA. I should not have known what I know now. Sometimes I wish I was clueless again. Its a weird mental battle
Has anyone ever talked about their experiences? I am thinking about telling my Therapist, but i'm too scared. Especially cuz i already have very bad experience with telling adults cuz the last time it ended up making everything worse.
Ik it's probably personal and everything, but can anyone tell me how it went when they told someone? And if it had like any consequences with police or something? Cuz i am still a minor and i'm scared that the police will investigate and everyone will know. I especially don't want my Mom to know...
I love him, he is 25 and I am 15. It’s really fucked up I know, but I matter to him. I ask about his interests, like, “What kind of music do you like?” and then he asks, “What about you?” I feel cherished and loved. I love the way he talks, and I want to live with him, get married, and all that. Do you think what I’m feeling is just temporary?
im friends with my groomer's best friend now, should i tell them about my groomer?, i already did this with another person they were friends with, they stopped being friends with my groomer, and im scared they arent going to believe me, or should i not do it because my groomer already feels bad enough, i'll add more details if needed
I'm a minor (15yo) and I believe I'm hypersexual (no diagnosis). I've had this since a young age and always had nasty thoughts. Those thoughts have always made me wonder what's wrong with me and why I think about such disgusting things. Now that I'm a teenager, I can kinda push away those thoughts? But especially when I have a bad mental health episode, I barely can and I crave it so bad.
The most fucked up part is that I could get my cravings satisfied by my gf, but first, I don't wanna use her. She doesn't deserve that, and second, I kinda want it to have no meaning? In my head, I crave to be abused and used and then just get tossed away.
Now to the grooming part, I have been groomed before, and what makes it even worse is that I liked it and even sought it. I loved what those people said about me and my body (also sometimes sent them pics of myself) and what they wanted to do with me. At one point, it got so bad that I would've met up with someone (gladly, it didn't happen).
There was also one situation where I was messaging a 19yo, and it was going on for like 2–3 months. Our conversations were very sexual, and sometimes we'd even send each other pics and videos. I knew it was wrong, but I simply didn't do anything about it. I did everything he said and one time even took pics on a train in the bathroom. Sometimes it was really exhausting, and it made me think so much worse. Btw, all that happened before I was with my gf.
She kinda helped me get out of this, not on purpose. She still doesn't know about it, but some things she told me hit me very hard, and I blocked the 19yo (many times I thought about and was almost about to unblock them). After this incident, I broke down and regretted it so much. It made my anxiety so bad in the weeks after. I was and still am so disgusted with myself.
I'm kinda in a better headspace now, but today it was really bad again. I almost was about to let some creeps text me and groom me again. And my coping mechanism aren't really a better option.
theyve been very close and grown up alongside each other however their relationship has gotten increasingly touchy now. like INCREASINGLY touchy. pretty sure theyve made out and hes fingered her. yeah which is bad and i dont know if i should classify this as grooming since they grew up so close and their families are so close. only problem is this family friend lives overseas and theyre long distance so stuff only happens like once a year. she thinks its fine and her parents sorta know theyre doing some stuff? but idk im not an ass for thinking this is weird right?
it was my dad, he was abusive as is and threatened to k-ll me daily.
anyway idk if it was grooming but he was a fucking creep. looking at me naked, talking sexual to me, touching my ass, and stealing my underwear once or twice.
i hated it. he was an asshole and only kept me from running away by giving me money and letting me skip school
not to mention he was friends with a pdf file
edit: please don’t vent or anything here i just want advice
I don't know how to stop. I always end up feeling bad and used after but I keep doing it, partly because I don't really have any friends and all my parents tell me is to go to my room or not to bother tell so I'm all alone.
One guy I often talked to was actually nice. He was kind, spent time with me, spoiled me and was just the first person to actually want to be around me but his gf found out and after haven't heard from him.
I don't know what to do. I want to stop and am trying but feels as if somehow I always end up going back but right now it's been a couple weeks so am proud of that so far and am gonna do my best to keep doing it until this is nothing more than a bad memory.
For context, yes I have been sexually assaulted and exploited by several people as a child before this incident and had a porn addiction when I was 9. (I know! Yikes!)
When I was 16-17 I had this weird sexual relationship with my uncle (50 yo at the time). We were always close, and I could talk to him about everything and anything; But it just kept getting increasingly more and more sexual.
One Christmas he stayed with us for like a week and we flirted hard and there were late nights when it was just the two of us. Eventually it got to the point where I was taking his hands and putting them on my chest, giving him permission to grope me. This progressed, and he touched me everywhere. Fingering me, sucking my nipples, licking/biting me, and I… liked it, I wanted him to do it. I touched him too. I sucked him off, and we were enjoying ourselves. We never had sex, but we would flirt and “joke” about it.
I didn’t really have any issues about this interactions at first other than him almost breaking my 1 condition which was no kissing (for some reason kissing was more intimate to me than sex at the time). It really scared me when he tried to kiss me, and he later apologized, saying it was an automatic impulse from the sexual interactions we were having.
The following months I had really bad feelings about the whole thing. I had terrible dysphoria, and I couldn’t help but feel like I was groomed. Especially after he made me promise to be hush hush about the whole thing. When I expressed this to him he said that he felt like he was the one being taken advantage of because I did most of the initiating. For a while this convinced me that I was in the wrong, and that I sexually assaulted him.
I dont want to get anyone in trouble I just want to understand what happened. From everything I’ve researched, if a child is coming onto an adult the appropriate response is to shut them down and avoid leading them on. I don’t believe my uncle is a bad person, and I don’t think he is a pedophile (he says i was the only minor he had feelings like this towards) and I want to believe that he is the victim, but looking back, he indulged me like this, flirting back for months. Responsible adults aren’t supposed to flirt back to minors.
Yes I did the initiating, and yes I wanted him to flirt with me and touch me, but the fact that he did just makes me feel weird.
Am I in the wrong here for seducting him when I was a minor? Or is he in the wrong for going along with it?
Im so confused and I can’t talk to anyone about this because I don’t want him to get in trouble, I just need to get it off my chest!
I know children can sexually assault adults, but this feels like more than that!?! It’s like we assaulted each other?!?
She was recommended to me by another specialist my parents sent me to when I came out to them as transgender. At our first session she informed me and my mom that I'm too young for Hormone Replacement Therapy, but she would be happy to help me with whatever issues I have. After that she was my therapist from ages 14-18.
Some things I find weird now:
she was very anti-medication, when I asked her if she could help me get medication for ADHD she recommended me an herbal suplement called "good trips"
she stated that any kind of medication (including testosterone) will make me stupid
she continuously brought up her other patients' stories (not sharing their names though)
she insisted I was "too smart" always saying that "if I went to a different psychologist they'd send me to a psych ward"
after a very emotional session she asked whether she could hug me, because "she didn't know how else to help me" and this became a thing we did after every session
one time during a pretty peaceful period of my life - I asked her to talk about herself during my session and she talked about her divorce and the way her ex-husband was treating her for the whole hour
she gave me her private Facebook account saying to message her whenever I want
she said multiple times that I am "special" just like her daughter
even though she was said to be a specialist in this field she continuously rejected helping me with my transition, saying I'm too young to do anything (when I now know that I wasn't). When I was really pushing though, she sent me to a really sketchy psychiatrist with an office in the backrooms of some old bar (?) who ridiculed me and traumatized me sexually. After that she said "He's like that sometimes" and made me believe that every doctor is going to treat me like this.
she told me "in secret" that she didn't like LGBT, because she thought pride parades make people mad
she told me she got her nipples pierced to deal with her trauma and recommended it to me
she supported unhealthy delusions of a soulmate (? figure) saying she also feels the same way with some people
Now I feel like I can't go to a different therapist because "they wouldnt understand me". I feel dirty when I think about her hugging me or us discussing sexual topics. I don't know what to do, we didn't do anything sexual and she didn't pursuit me romantically I just feel used and dirty. Please tell me, if any of this is weird.
I’m 13m and with my boyfriend who’s 16 currently we met on discord, and he keeps saying how he wants to makeout and do sexual stuff to me sometimes I entertain it but I can’t help but feel guilty. He says he wants to break up with me when he turns 18 so he doesn’t get In trouble, I guess what I’m really asking is should I break up with him and Im I really be groomed or just overthinking it?
I’m \[24F adult\] now, and I recently found some old messages between me and my junior high school teacher from back when I was still a student there.
we are both female, and while I never knew her exact age back then, looking back at our history now has left me feeling super confused.
I’ll just paste some of the messages she sent me here since I can’t attach screenshots in this Reddit community. these were the messages:
• “And i miss so much of you... A lot.”
• “No, you are always doubting yourself as one promise keeper.. but we do trust you. I do trust you.
You need to believe that I trust you. Nobody else will.”
• “Do not ever ever forget that you are very special to me. I love you a whole lot. Always here for you! 😘*”*
• “yes and i miss you a lot”
• “❤️* with love. dont cry you have us. we may not be family by blood but in heart..*”
• “and Christmas is coming. you being there alive and happy is a perfect gift for me. i know you always wanted to give me gifts. give me those. but also for us. we love you”
• “I always love you. I do. your thoughts are total opposite of mine. love you.”
• “Hehehe. Miss me?”
• Her: I love how you are honed.
My reply: Honed?
Her: You’re the sweetest and sincerest.
• “You’re the truest child I encounter, but you need confidence booster and guarded therapeutic words.”
• “I miss you. I’m sorry if it’s super random that i thought of you”
• “Haha i really miss you. I appreciate your effort always ❤”
• “I miss those moments with you”
• Me: How are you?
Her reply: Miss me?
• “I miss you 😘*”*
• “I miss you sooooooo bad.”
• “I miss you. I miss your presence.”
To give some context:
I had a massive crush on her starting in 8th grade that grew into a one-sided where I fell in love with her without her knowing, lasting all the way through 10th grade.
We weren't close at all in 8th grade, but because I was very attention-seeking and pursuing, we eventually grew close. I used to buy her gifts, some chocolates or any random food she loves.
We used to go out together for coffee, late-night walks, movies, and even on Valentine’s Day, I brought her food and went to her apartment, which was just nearby our school (Though to be fair, other students hung out at her apartment sometimes too, like when a group of students would go over to record cover songs).
Other people definitely noticed our closeness. Schoolmates would say things to me like:
"I noticed you and \[teacher\] always go home together after school. I first saw you in her faculty and I always see you there."
"Are you and \[teacher\] relatives? I notice you two are so close."
She even told me once herself that other teachers thought we were a couple, and she casually brought that up in front of our other students.
My 24-year-old self feels kind of off imagining myself saying these things to someone younger, but maybe she's just really sweet as a person generally?? especially since everyone on campus loved her.
but to me, at this age of 24, it just feels kinda off to imagine myself saying things like that to someone younger, or especially if im a teacher and they’re a student
At the same time, I know her. She’s a good, decent person with solid values, and I still have a lot of respect for her.
Recently, she sent me a quick message just asking about me with a casual greeting. She’s married and has a family now
Part of me still struggles to understand where our bond fell on the platonic spectrum, especially considering how I felt about her.
when my friends and i one time open up about this topic, they said that i was being groomed. Altho idk what to say bc I know she’s a good person, yet at the same time looking back it feels off somehow.
I’m not going to lie, I did get excited and happy when she gave me attention. I really enjoyed those moments and probably looked forward to them more than I realized. I think that’s part of why I’m having a hard time making sense of my feelings about the bond.
So my question is: how should I understand the nature of the bond we had, especially given how I felt about her? I’d really appreciate your advice.
TL;DR: I’m 24F and had a major crush on my former junior-high teacher, and we eventually became very close back then. Looking back at our interactions now, I’m trying to make sense of the nature of our bond and my own feelings toward it.
Sorry that I keep posting here. It’s just that the people are nice here.
So for context I am 16f almost 17 and I’ve been groomed and exploited 17 times since the age of 5 but the online grooming started when I was 8. I would often get exploited like 4 times a week recently. The reason why I lowkey do this on purpose is because I am lonely and depressed a lot and also my bipolar and PTSD makes me hypersexual. I just wanted to vent, thank you.
13 F: basically since I’ve turned 13 I’ve been putting myself like in the way of grooming purposely for older men and I’ve seen other women speak about it and say it’s just a phase that most teen girls go through but I start to get a little jealous of all my friends who have boyfriends and girlfriends our age and it’s like I can’t find anyone so I’ve just been putting myself towards groomers instead and it’s like a pathetic feeling I get every time I do. I’ve sent nudes before to several guys and I’m a bit concerned that they could have been shared around. but I keep talking to these guys even though I know it’s so wrong. I’ve only told one of my close friend’s about some of of the guys but I’m just so scared to tell my mother and my family because i feel like they may want me to tell the authorities or just make me go to church. like right now two guys I’ve been speaking to for a month or to, one is 36 and the other is 54 and I had an entire breakdown one night because one of them said he needed to find women his own age. it’s like I want to speak out and have help but I know I still want to do it. I just wanted to get advice on it and just share my experience!
Well uh hi, I feel very strange and needing to post here for help because I don’t know what else to do, today at therapy I was hit with the truth and realization I might’ve been groomed, and now I feel so weird and wanting to cry.
Here’s a little bit of context: I met these people on 2023 and we were minors at the time but the moment that friend turned 18 on 2024 shit started to get strange, he felt comfortable letting out his sexuality and stuff and his partner who then turned into my “best friend” wrote smut and nsfw we were minors but with a clear age gap, even as an adult my ex friend would share with me their smut works and nsfw illustrations with me when I am and was a minor.
At the time I thought it was normal but today at therapy I flipped at the realization it could’ve been grooming, they show that work still with other people and I am worried to be crazy and a mythomaniac, please help me figure out if this is grooming.
i dont know if this is relatable at all but i have the worst stockholm syndrome. i swear i dont know how to stop missing my groomer and wanting to be near him and its ruining my life. im so sad that it seems like this feeling is just eternal at this point.
Im tired of falling back into old habits, I keep on talking to older men and going back to groomers. I just can’t stop and I don’t wanna do it anymore but I just can’t i don’t know how to. F17