u/femmem27

Do you have any K-pop girl group albums? How many? I only have 3 but I just ordered an Aespa album and Twice photocards. I have Le Sserafim, Twice, and Katseye. I need more!

I am a cis woman and she is a trans woman, we’ve known each other for 3 years. We reconnected in January 2026 and made it official 3 days later.. that’s when I started experiencing ROCD symptoms. I kept breaking up with her due to ROCD, it was a compulsion. When I talk to her, get serious with her it triggers my OCD, when I don’t talk to her, want to move on it settles. This is my first time dating a trans woman, it attacks mostly about fear of judgment from other people. I fear that I’ll get portrayed as bi or pan.. nothing wrong with being either but I’ve always been a lesbian and I had to fight to be visible, to accept myself, to love myself. It’s a mix of ROCD and SO-OCD. So it gives me trouble. This isn’t reassurance or anything but just wondering if I should not be in that relationship/situation if it triggers me like that or stay and work through it.. who knows!

I’m sorry, I posted this the other day and I deleted it due to an issue with myself. Are there any K-pop trans girl groups? I know there was a group called Lady. Were there anymore?

What is your type of woman physically? What does she look like? If you don’t have a physical type, that’s okay, I do have a type but it’s not necessarily required.. it’s just what I like.

My physical type of woman is I don’t mind the race/nationality/ethnicity. I love feminine women who wears makeup, nails, heels, has her hair done. I like women with long hair. The height can be short or the same height as me but not too tall.

I had SO-OCD(sexual orientation OCD), I started experiencing symptoms in August 2024. In January 2026 I reconnected with a trans woman who I’ve known for 3 years. We made it official 3 days later, I started to experience ROCD(relationship OCD) symptoms. This is my first time dating a trans woman, both of our families are homophobic and transphobic so we have to hide our true relationship.. we can be openly together but in a different dynamic. I question if I am attracted to her, I have doubts about the distance since we are long distance, I question about sexual intimacy. I don’t have a problem with any of those but OCD blows things out of proportion. I have compulsions like leaving the relationship, seeking reassurance, analyzing, obsessing, posting and deleting certain posts. I didn’t have this until her and I reconnected and tried to be serious, not blaming her or anything, just saying.

I hope this is a safe place for trans women. Are there any trans girl groups in K-pop? Maybe they’re not active now but I’ll still check them out!

What are y’all’s preferences? These are mine:

•Cis 
•Lesbian 
•Same age or older 
•Short/same height but not too tall
•Femme 
•Monogamous 
•Wants the same future as me(marriage and kids) 
•No studs/mascs 
•No polyamory 
•No moms 
•No bi/pan 
•No bi curious 
•No smokers/stoners/alcoholics 
•No poor communication 
•No late in life lesbians 
•No love bombers 
•Doesn’t have baggage 
•Doesn’t view women as objects 
•No liars or cheaters 
•No trans women
•No chrsitians and or conservatives 

I don’t care about race/nationality/ethnicity or physical appearance really. With physical appearance just feminine/girly, long hair(doesn’t have to be super long). But other than that I’m not too picky with all of that.

Some of y’all were giving me a hard time on the last post so I am reposting it. Now before I say anything else, I am pushing 30 so I do not feel comfortable stanning a group who has a lot of minors in it, 1-2 minors is not bad but 3+ is a no for me. And I don’t think that’s weird at all! Anyway.. I want to look into more girl groups, I currently stan 14 girl groups. The last 4 girl groups that I stan, I started stanning them in May. Do y’all have any girl groups that you think I should check out? I’ll list who I stan..

1. ⁠Aespa
2. ⁠Blackpink
3. ⁠Itzy
4. ⁠Kiss of Life
5. ⁠Twice
6. ⁠Red Velvet
7. ⁠Le Sserafim
8. ⁠I-dle
9. ⁠IVE
10. Babymonster
11. Kep1er
12. Meovv
13. NMIXX
14. Illit

I have a question first.. imagine you have a friend or a girlfriend and they’re always depressed, insecure, needy,etc. and only depend on you and other people to be happy. What do you think about that? I’m not talking about they have bad days sometimes but always like that everyday. Could you handle that? I explained to someone that I felt like a caretaker or responsible for someone’s feelings when I have met someone like that and she said “that’s toxic thinking”. Like am I wrong?

Another thing I want to say is I get frustrated on dating apps. I am a femme lesbian and I always attract women who aren’t my type. Trans women and mascs/studs always like my profile, that’s all I attract. I am fem x fem and I prefer cis women.

I went to a fair last weekend, I was standing in line and I was looking around. I looked to my left, across from me and I caught a girl staring at me. When I caught her staring at me, she would look away then I would look at her and I would look away when she caught me.. I wish I wasn’t shy or I would’ve talked to her. I would’ve asked her age first, if she was an adult I would’ve asked if she wanted to walk around or ride something with me, she probably would’ve said no but ya know lol. I still think about her 🤭.

Also how do y’all feel about “late in life lesbians”? And I don’t like when people tell me “sexuality is fluid”.. not mine.

I really don’t like the terms “queer”, “sapphic”, and “WLW””. Back when I was growing up “queer” was a derogatory term for gay men, it was a slur but our community says they “reclaimed” it. Sapphic literally means being romantically and sexually attracted to women.. just say you’re a lesbian. Honestly in my 21 years of being in the LGBTQ+ community, I just heard about “sapphic” like last year or something. WLW.. not only lesbians use it but so do bi/pan women.. when bi/pan women use it, it’s like.. I don’t know because you think they’re only into women but you find out they’re also into men. Anyway.. I don’t like them.

Do y’all use dating apps? What apps do you use? I haven’t been on any dating apps in like over a month or something, kind of scared to go back on them but I will eventually.

I just wanted to talk about my feelings, I have no one to talk to. I’ve been single for almost 4 years. I did go back into the closet for 2 years. But after my breakup with my ex gf I haven’t dated since. I tried talking to a few women but it didn’t work out. I’m scared to put myself out there, I honestly don’t know how me dating will work again. I reconnected with someone in January 2026 but that’s not the relationship I want but now I am attached not from desire or love but like a trauma thing. I can’t seem to move on because I have it in my head that I won’t find another safe, calm, and healthy relationship again and that no woman would want me. I am fem4fem and it’s hard to find that. I always attract women who aren’t my cup of tea which is frustrating. I’m going to heal and move on, I’m done settling for less, trying to be okay with things that I am not okay with,etc. I just needed to express my feelings, thank you!

This is just me yapping, saying my opinions based on my experiences!

First of all I want to say that I love this subreddit, y’all think the same way I do, have almost the same feelings on most topics. I’ve been searching for an only lesbian space, so I’m glad this one exists!

This post might get downvoted or removed but have you ever been called transphobic just because you’re not attracted or not interested in dating trans women? I have! For me, I respect them as women and I can be friends with them but not date or do anything sexual with them. Edit: I just got told that if lesbians like penis shaped strap but don’t like trans women then they’re transphobic.. a strap and the real thing are completely different!

It upsets me that being a lesbian is viewed as something straight up sexual. As in people think that being a lesbian is all about sex. For me, being a lesbian is much more than that, maybe it’s just me where I am demisexual. Anytime I say I am a lesbian people always go straight to sex. It’s frustrating to me!

Before I start this post I want to say that this is based on my experiences, this is my opinion. Of course you can disagree but don’t be rude about it. I might get downvoted or my post removed.

So for me, it’s frustrating when I tell my experiences as a lesbian.. how it was so rough on me for over 2 decades and a bi/pan woman tries to relate to it. In my opinion being gay/lesbian is more targeted than being bi/pan. I’m not trying to make it a competition but bi/pan women has more options like they can be with the opposite sex anytime, they don’t have to hide that but us lesbian women.. some of us had to go through so much. I don’t know if I’m making sense but it just makes me upset how bi/pan women tries to relate to me as a lesbian. In my opinion bi/pan is way different than being lesbian, it’s not the same. I think where I had to go through so much, it upsets me a lot to see bi/pan women thinks they relate to me as a lesbian. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me!

I absolutely love this sub! The posts are so relatable and it’s like y’all think the same way I do. I just love it here!

Happy Pride Lesbians!! ❤️

I’m not a big fan of lesbian shows and or movies because most of the actresses are actually straight, bi, or pan. I would look up the actresses and they’re married to a man in real life. Or in shows and movies one of the women is with a man first. Why are men in lesbian shows and movies?! My point is I don’t like them because they’re not actually lesbians and there’s always men in the movies and shows.

I stuck a nerve on this one, didn’t I? Lol. I’m not upset about it, I was just saying, calm down lol

These are the girl groups I just started to stan and my bias in each group..

Kep1er: Dayeon
Meovv: Gawon
Nmixx: Sullyoon
Illit: Minju

Also I have 2 questions..

1. Is Dreamcatcher still active?
2. Is Girlset considered a K-pop group?

Who is your bias/bias wrecker in each girl group you stan? If you stan a lot of girl groups, you don’t have to list them all if you don’t want to.

Aespa- Giselle
Bias wrecker: NingNing
Blackpink- Rosé
Bias wrecker: Lisa
Itzy- Chaeryeong
Bias wrecker: Lia and Yuna
Kiss of Life: Belle
Bias wrecker: Hanuel
Twice- Jeongyeon
Bias wrecker: MoMo, Dahyun, and Tzuyu
Red Velvet- Seulgi
Bias wrecker: nobody
Le Sserafim- Kazuha
Bias wrecker: nobody
I-dle- Minnie
Bias wrecker: nobody
Katseye- Daniela
Bias wrecker: Megan or Sophia
IVE- Wonyoung
Bias wrecker: nobody
Babymonster- Asa
Bias wrecker: Ahyeon