u/futureproblemz

I was banned from Hinge 2 years ago, never looked into why and never bothered appealing since I was too addicted to dating apps anyways.

Fast forward to 2 weeks ago, I decide I want to get back on Hinge, send them an appeal by email, and they reinstate my account in under 24 hours. I assume that means they looked into my ban and found it to be a mistake, but not sure.

Anyways, I have recreated my account, and I have gotten 0 matches in 2 weeks. The reason I feel like this is a shadowban is because in the past, I would get alot more matches with way fewer likes sent. At this point, I have probably sent over 200 likes with no matches.

Is it possible that even though they unbanned my account, it is still shadowbanned in a way?

I'd say 3/6 photos are the same as my old profile, phone number is also the same, but I thought I wouldn't have to worry about stuff like that considering they unbanned me themselves.

I was banned from Hinge 2 years ago, never looked into why and never bothered appealing since I was too addicted to dating apps anyways.

Fast forward to 2 weeks ago, I decide I want to get back on Hinge, send them an appeal by email, and they reinstate my account in under 24 hours. I assume that means they looked into my ban and found it to be a mistake, but not sure.

Anyways, I have recreated my account, and I have gotten 0 matches in 2 weeks. The reason I feel like this is a shadowban is because in the past, I would get alot more matches with way fewer likes sent. At this point, I have probably sent over 200 likes with no matches.

Is it possible that even though they unbanned my account, it is still shadowbanned in a way?

I'd say 3/6 photos are the same as my old profile, phone number is also the same, but I thought I wouldn't have to worry about stuff like that considering they unbanned me themselves.

I just downloaded Hinge recently and noticed there is no way to indicate if you are vegetarian other than explicitly mentioning it in a prompt or poll. How would you guys go about it?

I don't personally mind dating meat eaters, but I don't want to match with people who wouldn't date a vegetarian. Should I just mention that exact thing in a prompt? I also though about using the "what to we have in common" poll and putting "I am vegetarian" in there but then I thought that might make people think I am only looking to date vegetarians.

I also feel like a man being a vegetarian is more of a turn off to women, than a woman being vegetarian is to men. So I rather just get it out of the way

Please hear me about before you all answer that you would obviously take the 110k offer. For context, I am 28 years old and live downtown, both offices are downtown so commute is not much of an issue. However, my issue with in person jobs was never the commute, I just focus much better at home, and enjoy having the freedom to walk around my apartment when I'm working/thinking.

I am currently in a dilemma where I am working at a 75k job where I only have to go in office twice a week, and the work-life balance is pretty solid. Solid as in I work hard during 9-5, but only have to work outside of that during rare occasions when projects are at their busiest. In this job, we also have 5% rrsp matching, and an annual bonus from 5 - 10%, so the total comp is higher than 75k. I think the highest my salary will go at this company is probably around 90k (plus RRSP matching and bonus), maybe 3 years from now. I still don't have much experience for this role and have been here for just under a year, hence the 75k salary.

But I now have an offer for a job where the salary is 110k, but the issue is that they need me in the office everyday and expect around 60 hours of work a week (a C-Suite employee said this to me during the interview). This is a very high growth tech company and they were open about it being a high pressure role during the interview process, that will require alot of hours. But at this company, 110k is the floor of what I can make, I can make up to 200k here without ever going into management, as the role I have an offer for is a junior role. And if they go public, which is very plausible in the next 5 years, then maybe more. This company is also a good name on my resume, so if I can make it to the 1.5 year mark, it will open decent opportunities at large tech companies with better WLB.

However, I have worked a high pressure role before where I had to work evenings and weekends, and it honestly broke me, I had no life outside of work and hated life. The difference is that this company pays much better, but I just don't know if it's worth it. Part of me is wondering if I should just reject the 110k offer, keep my current job, and use this whole process as motivation to build a side hustle instead to get my overall income higher.

Edit -

I did not provide this context in my original post, the reason why this may be difficult to go back to another job if the new one is too stressful, is because I have never stayed at a company longer than my current role, which has been 10 months. My resume looks rough right now, last gig was 6 months, one before that was 4 months. So the next company I go to, I must stay there for atleast 1.5 years imo.

I have some decent time at a job before that one, but there's a 3 year gap in between that and the 4 month gig since I went back to school.

I jumped alot after my second degree because I couldn't find a job relevant to my degree at first (Com sci), and so I started in a really low paying role after graduating (45k base)

I'm in a tricky situation, I recently spent a month going through an interview process for a Solution Engineer role but they need references that they can call before they give me the official offer. This is a role that would completely change my career trajectory, and will probably change my life financially as well.

And by references, I don't mean a background check reference where HR confirms that you worked at your previous company, I mean they want to speak with people who worked with me before. For additional information, this is not a pre-sales role, it is post-sales, hence more of an implementation role, but this is the best subreddit for me to post it. The issue is, ever since I graduated with my Com Sci degree 2 years ago, I have jumped jobs quite a lot.

Job 1 - My first gig was an SDR role and I was only there for 3-4 months, my manager was really disappointed that I left so quick, and I just started performing alright near the end of my time there so there wouldn't be much of a reference to get.

Job 2 - My next gig was a technical implementation consultant role, but it was at a toxic company that paid very little, yet had horrible work-life balance. I knew this going in based on Glassdoor reviews but took the role to get my foot into the door, since I did not want to be an SDR or AE. I lasted 6 months there, I did alright in the role but not great as I couldn't keep up with the workload, and I had a poor relationship with my manager. I left with a 1 week notice rather than a 2 week notice, to which my manager told me I was burning bridges. However, I had a really good relationship with one of my clients here which is a possible reference (it was a very client facing role0.

Job 3 - Finally, my current gig is another technical implementation consultant role, I have been here for almost a year. This has been the best job I have ever had, and as overconfident it is to say this, it feels like I am loved by everyone here. I made an instant impact, and my manager had more trust in me 2 months into the role, than he had in teammates that were here for much longer. When I leave this role, I will have countless people to act as references, my manager, other team's managers, and seniors on my team.

My dilemma is, who do I ask to be my reference? Do I risk my current role and ask my current manager to be my reference? It seems the general consensus is to never do that, but there is a part of me that thinks he would be disappointed but still happy for me (since it's a big comp jump). Can I ask a client from Job 2 to be my reference, or is it bad practice to ask a client from an old role?

I also did a couple internships at a company before my CS degree (it is my second degree), and am planning on asking my manager from there to be a reference as well, since I need at least two references.

Nearing the end of the hiring process for a post sales Solutions Engineer role (not sure where else to post). How likely is it that they ask for a reference?

Only time I've had a new employer ask for a reference from old managers is an SDR role I did 2 years ago. Just worried about it happening now because my relationship with my last manager was horrible. My relationship with my current manager is amazing but not sure if I can ask him to be my reference for a new job when I still work here lol.

They are h*ring people with zero sales expeirence straight to SMB AE roles, what is going on lol. This is like pre 2020 when Tech companies would hire people with any sales experience straight to an AE role, but even worse.

Kind of crazy to see because in the last few years, I haven't even been seeing people that are AEs at non tech companies transition straight into AE roles at tech companies

I got a BSA job at a bank about a year ago, I have been loving it so far, I enjoy how project and team-oriented the work is and it just feels like a very cozy and secure job. Prior to this, I had only worked at Tech companies and I much prefer the work environment in a bank, I find the work to be more interesting, less stressful, plus work-life balance is much more manageable. I also love how there isn't any forced socializing like there is at Tech companies lol.

Ngl it also feels like bar isn't as high working at a bank, my coworkers and manager act like I am way smarter than I am, while I was considered to be a very average employee at my last two companies.

That said, I am starting to get out of the honeymoon phase and thinking about my future some more. It feels like your average BSA makes about 100k TC in Canada, from a combination of base/bonus/rrsp matching. Don't get me wrong, I'm really happy with that right now, but with Toronto getting so expensive, it would be nice to make more in the future. There is a part of me that also thinks staying here for years would not be bad, it's good for my mental health and the salary is solid.

I guess I'm here to ask other BSAs at Canadian Banks what their opinions are, do you also feel like there is a ceiling on how much we can make? Do you also enjoy your jobs, especially those that have been at the same place for a few year now?

I sometimes see people on reddit talking about how they are making crazy money as contractors but I don't really see postings like that.

The show is on the 15th, I can't make it anymore and so I sold on stubhub but it still isn't giving me the option to transfer on Ticketmaster

Still lots of leetcode? System design? Something else?

I graduated almost 3 years ago, never got a job as a SWE, eventually got a job as a Systems Analyst and am making 80k. I'm tired of feeling average, I want to lock in the next few months for potential SWE interviews but just not sure how different they are now

A bit about me - I graduated with a bachelor's in Computer Science in August 2023, and couldn't find a job for a whole year. I tried applying to every type of technical role - SWE, QA, Analyst, Help Desk, etc, and had no luck. So I pivoted to looking for a Sales job and found one pretty quickly.

I knew I didn't want to be actually be in Sales so I started applying to jobs again 4 months in and I landed a Junior Consultant role a small SaaS Company. That was an incredibly stressful and low paying job so I started applying to new roles 6 months into that job, and by some miracle I landed a Business Systems Analyst role at a Bank, which I've been in for 8 months now.

The first few months of this new job were glorious since I was in the honeymoon phase, I'm making 75k + bonus + rrsp matching, have great work life balance, and a great manager, I felt like I made it in life. But now that I'm 8 months in and no longer living life on survival mode, I'm remembering the ambitions I had when I started my CS degree of becoming a SWE and eventually working at a big Tech company, and I realize that I don't just want to settle at my new job at the bank. The version of me 2 years ago would be really happy with where I am now, but the version of me 6 years ago would be disappointed.

Also I know it sounds overconfident, but I already feel like I know everything there is to know in my BSA job at the bank. My team is responsible for doing configuration of our software for new client implementations, test planning, and a good bit of manual QA. This does involve some coding as parts of the configuration require writing scripts, and also I write SQL queries for validation/troubleshooting, but it is honestly nothing too complex. In 8 months, I genuinely know how to do majority of the role, and my manager trusts me more than some coworkers that have been in this kind of role for years. I just can't imagine doing this for 10+ years like many of coworkers have been doing, I crave working on more complex projects/problems during my 9-5. I also want to work with people much smarter than me to grow, and I don't think that kind of environment exists in BSA world in banks. My manager and lead are so incredibly intelligent, but then half of my other coworkers just make me wonder how they ever got the job.

Overall, a SWE role is really the only thing I feel like would give me what I'm looking for in my career, but I don't know if it's too late as it's been almost 3 years since I graduated and I have no SWE experience. So I guess I'm here to ask if people think it's still possible to make the transition and if you have any tips. Let's say I become amazing at Leetcode questions 6 months from now, do I have a shot, or is it very very low? Of course the hard part would be getting an interview. I suppose my other option would be trying to go the PM route, but being a PM just does not excite.

I know that AI has changed the role tremendously and that the SWE job market is more volatile as ever, but I just don't want to let go of this dream.