u/honey222bunny

I'm 29 yrs, 5'2", 127 lbs, exclusively breastfeeding a big baby. I selected "moderately active" bc I do bodyweight strength training 3-4x wk, stairmaster 1-3x wk, typically walk a couple miles almost every day with the baby in the wrap and pushing toddler in the stroller, and I'm generally on my feet staying busy with the kids most days.

I don't know how many steps I'm avging but I hope to get a fitbit or something this week bc I'm really curious.

The TDEE calculator returned about 2400 as my maintenance. I started tracking today even tho my diet was all over the place for the holiday and it was surprisingly a bit under 2000 cals. I will keep tracking just to get a better idea of my avg.

Does this sound right? Roughly How many steps should I be taking to be considered truly moderately active?

I hope it's ok to post here bc my goal is more body recomp like fat loss instead of just weight loss. I wasn't planning on eating in a calorie deficit rn, but if it feels a bit like today, then I think it might be manageable.

Btw the big baby is a happy healthy chunk a monk nearly 8 mos old so I'm not worried about my milk supply. Really I started tracking my cals bc I want to start eating more protein and fiber. If that means I'm also having fewer overall cals then great I guess!?

I co sleep w my toddler and infant on a 3 inch futon on the floor. Nights have been really rough, my sleep is horribly broken and it's really hard on me :'( really want to fix this. It's been going on for a really long time.

But mostly I want some time to myself back. I would even happily roll 3 inches away from the baby so I can journal before going to bed myself.

Anybody go through this? Some nights are better than others but he's basically had to be latched at least every hour or he screams since about 4 months. He has reflux and still spits up. He's a happy healthy chunky baby otherwise , just a horrible sleeper.

I searched this subreddit but many places listed are now closed or they're only available during pop up markets.

Does anyone know where I can browse handmade ceramic mugs in person?? Locally made is best but doesn't have to be.

So far I had some luck at island boy kaimuki. Icky love Kailua looks beautiful but they're currently closed / does anyone know if I can find these at farmers markets or boutiques ? I also Went to a few makers markets and couldn't find any.

Appreciate any recommendations. Thank you!

My firstborn was a horrible sleeper but he did OK once we started co sleeping. It wasn't ideal but I was functional.

New baby is somehow even worse. I literally cannot remember the last time I slept for more than an hour at a time. He is still spitting up at 6 months and he seems to wake up in pain so I guess he has reflux or something. He's gaining weight perfectly fine he's a mega chunk a monk and he's a happy healthy baby otherwise.

My husband cannot console the baby - the baby will literally scream and scream and scream until he can latch. So it's not like we can take shifts and I can get any decent stretch of sleep.

Baby's been eating high cal solids for a bit and it doesn't seem to be helping at all.

What can I do? Refuse to nurse and just bounce him and stretch the times between night nursing? Sounds terrible and like it will be torturous for all of us involved but is that my only option?

I don't know what to do. I've never been in such a dark place like this before and it's 100% from the broken sleep.

I think I'll feel better when my kids are no longer torturing me with sleep deprivation but man I really am so upset about the fact that I'm basically on 24/7. I never ever ever get a break. We have no family here. Husband works a ton. I'm co sleeping both my kids (out of desperation, idk what else to do at this point) so I don't have time alone in the evening. They tend to wake up at 5:30 so I'm not going to wake up earlier to have time alone then.

I basically hate my husband for being at the gym rn. I'm joking I love him and he's the best but we need to figure out how I can consistently get a break too bc I'm gonna freak out if I go on like this for much longer.

Sorry just feeling sorry for myself and need to vent / commiserate.

I just need some validation or advice please 😭 we have a 3yo and an infant, and we don't live near any family. Mf husband has traveled twice since new baby was born - 7 days when bb was 4 months and then 10 days at ~6 months. Leisure travel, not work. I encouraged him to accept these invitations to travel when I was pregnant so he is not the problem.

I just really struggled so much while he was away both times. It wasn't all bad, we had lots of good moments every day, we had some fun outings, but man it was a rollercoaster. I had so many moments of feeling sorry for myself when things were going poorly or I was exhausted, the house was a wreck, the children were torturing me w/ sleep deprivation at night lol. We also had some random problems both time so I'm sure that added to it - power outages, severe weather, random biblical level termite infestation, broken hot water heater. So maybe just poor timing.

I found myself getting really upset and irritable and it just put me in a really bad emotional place both times he went away. I was for real like on the verge of tears from exhaustion by day 9 of this most recent trip.

Is this just how it goes sometimes with two little children and only one adult ? I didn't expect it to be so hard. And now I feel like a shitty mom too bc I found so many moments frustrating and tiring , and I wasn't so patient and engaged w/ my sweet oldest child

Also I'm pissed off now bc my in laws planned my MIL's bday vacation on a tropical island on the opposite side of the planet for us WHEN WE LIve on a tropical island tourist destination LOL like wtf. They either wanted me to fly 20 hours w baby and toddler, or they wanted husband to leave me alone w the kids for this long. I wish I did not tell him to go lol

Lately i've been spending like 3-5 hours daily at two playgrounds nearby. I'm almost embarrassed by how often we are here lol. I swear it keeps me sane. my kids are entertained, we're not trashing the house, I don't have to look at the one million things I'd like to do around the house , my wild high energy toddler gets sun and exercise.

Is anyone else like this? I should've started much sooner. My husband's away on a work trip so we've been going twice a day and it's kind of amazing.

I am a SAHM, I have a 3.5yo and a 5 month old. My 3yo has always been pretty easygoing, happy guy. High energy and wild but really just a happy kid and didn't have very many tantrums. Sleep was tough but once we started co sleeping it got easier.

We travel internationally a few times a year. We host family often. We even just traveled (just me and boys) to see my family and he was literally an angel the entire time. Toddler has never had issues like this.

After our most recent 4 week visit from my in laws, he's like a different kid. yes I know way too freaking long and torturous for me so I'm sure it was weird for my toddler too. But he is scratching, hitting, being nasty and violent, refusing to share, not following any directions, having meltdowns about the littlest things.

Bedtime, which used to be very pleasant, snuggly, relaxing part of our day (the 2 boys and I snuggle and read to sleep) is now a NIGHTMARE. If takes hours to get the toddler to sleep and there is often screaming and violence.

What the actual F? I'm literally so upset. In laws visiting was already disruptive enough but now it's been weeks since they left and his behavior still hasn't improved much.

Has anyone gone through this, a sudden massive change in behavior after a disruption? Any advice? I'm so upset, stressed out, and tired. I feel really bad for my toddler bc he's obviously and distressed.

I don't know how to handle the hitting and attention seeking behaviors. Bedtime is impossible bc the children wake each other up.