u/ibetonlosingdogsssss

I used to cry a lot at every minor inconvenience but now i cant like i do wanna cry but i physically can’t and its somehow worse i fucking hate myself sm im a loser honestly but i have made peace with that. All i do is just doomscroll teens my age are doing so much and all i for is just lie on my bed and rant like a fucking loser i do wanna cry sm but I can’t

My parents hate me and my sibling hates me more than anything and that shatters my heart cuz the only people who were meant to love me dont theyve made it clear that they do love me and all but their words are really harsh they yell at me and call me names, my parents even slut shamed me mind you my parents, im falling behind academically, i was a really bright student but now all i do is wake up doomscroll and fight with my family they are never going to understand me and im so ashamed of myself cuz they used to say that all your good at is studying and now i cant even do that cuz of them

And its so weird cuz one day theyd be all happy and joyful and that gives me a sense of hope and genuine happiness but the next day they scream and yell at me for disobeying them like god forbid i have my own individuality they’re always like you’re so disrespectful but im not i honestly am not

And now whenever they yell at me i feel numb but j just keep on arguing with them and i cant stop that even when i do want to its so complicated i used to cry so much and it felt better after crying but now i cant and I cannot even think about these problems anymore like my mind drifts away from everything, im disgusted by myself honestly i wish that i was better i just wake up and keep scrolling until i fall asleep

My parents yell at me for getting up late and fight with me like im talking about extreme yelling and stuff cuz i wanna sleep late i physically cannot sleep early and every single time i beg them to let me stay awake so that i can study cuz i genuinely don’t wanna study at mornings but they dont get me they have problems with my friends and im not allowed to date i feel like no one loves me and no one would choose me

I used to cry a lot at every minor inconvenience but now i cant like i do wanna cry but i physically can’t and its somehow worse i fucking hate myself sm im a loser honestly but i have made peace with that. All i do is just doomscroll teens my age are doing so much and all i for is just lie on my bed and rant like a fucking loser i do wanna cry sm but I can’t

My parents hate me and my sibling hates me more than anything and that shatters my heart cuz the only people who were meant to love me dont theyve made it clear that they do love me and all but their words are really harsh they yell at me and call me names, my parents even slut shamed me mind you my parents, im falling behind academically, i was a really bright student but now all i do is wake up doomscroll and fight with my family they are never going to understand me and im so ashamed of myself cuz they used to say that all your good at is studying and now i cant even do that cuz of them

And its so weird cuz one day theyd be all happy and joyful and that gives me a sense of hope and genuine happiness but the next day they scream and yell at me for disobeying them like god forbid i have my own individuality they’re always like you’re so disrespectful but im not i honestly am not

And now whenever they yell at me i feel numb but j just keep on arguing with them and i cant stop that even when i do want to its so complicated i used to cry so much and it felt better after crying but now i cant and I cannot even think about these problems anymore like my mind drifts away from everything, im disgusted by myself honestly i wish that i was better i just wake up and keep scrolling until i fall asleep

My parents yell at me for getting up late and fight with me like im talking about extreme yelling and stuff cuz i wanna sleep late i physically cannot sleep early and every single time i beg them to let me stay awake so that i can study cuz i genuinely don’t wanna study at mornings but they dont get me they have problems with my friends and im not allowed to date i feel like no one loves me and no one would choose me

So the thing is that im 16 and i just got my personal phone and before that i had all of my social media accounts logged in my mom’s phone and she told me not to log out of her phone and I didn’t say anything cuz they don’t understand me and would have been mad

The day before yesterday my dad checked my phone or my dms specifically and im not okay with that im not okay with that and they got mad at me cuz i had some online friend and he was a male and they are now taunting me

My mom checks my account every single day and im pretty sure that she checks it twice a day i told them that im not okay with this and they always say we’re concerned and checking on what our kid is doing

My mom reads my chat with my bsf and she wrote about her crushes and some other problems she also checked the guy she had a crush on and its so problematic and messed up cuz she trusted me and i was one of the only 4 people who knew about this and 1 of these 4 persons is her crush and she jokes about them she told me to break our friendship and does not want me to be her friend my dad said the same thing

Im not allowed to date and they are constantly checking my phone my messages call log dms and all just to see if im talking to a boy nd when i do have some male friends with whom im talking normally they taunt me and get paranoid and checks each and every message i just got in trouble cuz one of my friends sent me reel and there was a cuss word and i replied with the same cuss word im sick of it

I (16F) get jealous of my friends or any other person when i feel that they are living better lives than me. If i see my one of friends getting a better grade than me i get this weird feeling of not being enough and i hate it cuz i cant enjoy that moment.

I see my old friends or acquaintances travelling spending alot of money living with a happy healthy and understanding family, and i feel so bad i dont even know if its exactly envy cuz i have been convincing myself that im not jealous

I see people having no financial problems and it makes me sad like so sad for myself im happy for them but then again im not for myself and ik its selfish ik that they might have problems in their lives aswell but i dont see that and dont wanna see that

All of my friends are so extremely pretty while im not and i feel so insecure about myself that i now have social anxiety, and actual anxiety(not self diagnosed)

I just saw someone on social media and we both know each other,her financial condition is very good and we’re financially struggling which somehow makes it sooo bad, travelling shes always travelling something that i wanna do so bad saw her getting all the things i want she has cool friends boyfriend abundance of money understanding parents and a very very pretty face i adore her honestly even tho we haven’t talked that much but still i get sorta jealous and its getting worse i need help

I (16F) am in 11th recently there’s been a lot going on in my life and im sorta in depression ig my parents and siblings they just keep scolding me and fighting with me im sick of it soo much it’s getting so bad but lets just not go there
So i gave my 10th board exam and got 99 or 98.8% to be precise and i cant focus and concentrate like i used to and it makes me feel worthless i try to study but just keep procrastinating and im so sick of it
Please help me get rid of procrastination
I chose humanities cuz i wanted to do something related to that field but even tho im doing what i wanna do i jus cant do it
I feel as if im loosing myself cuz of this studying was the only thing i was good at

I (16 F) just feel as if I'm the most boring person ever. It’s not as if I don’t have any hobbies or anything, but I just feel as if I’m not interesting. I feel so embarrassed of myself for literally everything, but it wasn’t like this from the start. I was a very cheerful kid, but that version of me is vanishing. I struggle to be friends with people and open up to them. Even my psychology teacher asked me why I don’t have any friends, when I just didn’t know how to talk and be a part of the group. She also said that I seem lost, but I’m genuinely not lost; I just don’t feel this sense of belongingness anywhere. I just feel as if I’m not a part of anything. I have anxiety. I’m slowly losing interest in everything, and my grades are dropping. I don’t have anything fun about me. It’s not even as if I don’t have friends I have some close friends but I can’t physically bring myself to tell them all of this because every time I think of doing so, this thought drives me crazy that I’m being a burden and they aren’t my therapist. The main problem is that I do want to have a lot of fun, but I don’t know how to do it and not be embarrassed by it.