u/lingobinch1

$425k? Really? I'm sorry but I'm just not buying it. In 2006? I'd believe $200k tops

Temple has an info session tonight at 6 EST and the link disappeared? Anyone know where to find the link if it's not in the confirmation email anymore?

Moving to Vienna for a year and also in the process of getting my Slovak citizenship by Descent but I do want to make a concerted effort to learn the language. Are there any groups, clubs, or communities for Slovak language?

I (23F) have always had a contentious relationship with my mom. I had a mostly idyllic childhood and my essential needs were met. My parents paid for my university tuition because they didn't want me to worry about student loans and it has been a massive leg up in life, for which I will always be grateful to them. My mom is the primary breadwinner in our house and controls the finances. I moved home after college to live rent free and save money for graduate school. In a lot of ways, it's been an okay living situation. Living rent free is an ideal, after all. If I weren't aggressively saving my money for graduate school, I would have moved out at this point.

Throughout my life, my mom has used her will over my family's finances as a way of controlling us. As grateful as I am for not having to pay tuition, it has been held over my head for most of my life and a constant reminder that my autonomy is limited. And yes, I could have just taken out loans like some of my friends and not had that particular strain of financial coercion, but she would have just found another avenue for that. I studied Arabic for a semester before my mom threatened to cut me off financially and pay my own tuition unless I changed to a different language because she is racist toward Arab people. At one point, she thought I spent too much time with my ex's family (hanging out roughly once every two weeks), and threatened to kick me out since I "obviously didn't want to spend time at home."

She has a habit of belittling me in front of my friends and cutting me down after an achievement. I worked retail for much of my teens and I brought her in on my off hours once, where she started talking to one of my co-workers, who praised my work and manners. She went on and on about how terrible I was at home.

Last year, I went on a couple of dates with someone who is Black and she chastised me for dating before going to grad school (a year and a half later). She's always had an issue with me expressing any kind of sexual autonomy, not letting me spend the night at a boyfriend's house and whatnot.

That brings me to today. I've been seeing someone new for the last several months. He is exactly who my mom would want me to date and eventually marry. I just told her that we've been dating the last couple of months and since I live at home, whenever I would see him, I would just tell her I'm going out with a friend. She's now not speaking to me because of this. I told her I didn't say anything about him until now because I didn't know if it would go anywhere but the real reason is because as soon as I would tell her, I feared that she might kick me out ("if you're old enough to have a boyfriend, you're old enough to live on your own"), stop paying my student loans (which would prevent me from being able to acquire my master's debt free, she has been against me getting my master's since I announced it and she has been covertly trying to prevent me from getting it), or just bitch me out for wanting to date or have sex as a twenty something.

I love my mom and she can be my best friend but through every point of contention, she has shown me that she does not respect me as an adult or individual and if I do something against her wishes or desires for me, there will be severe financial consequences. I've always been a really innocuous person, I never rebelled (at least In a way she would know about), I was studious in high school and graduated from one of the best universities in our country with high honors. I have a solid career trajectory and I would consider myself a productive member of society. I've never had any issues with my dad and he also doesn't understand why she is as financially coercive as she is and why she seems to pick on me more than my older brother.

Because my needs were met as a child, my tuition was paid for, and I now live rent free, I am conflicted. My mother is certainly not like my friends' parents and everyone I talk to about her doesn't understand her either. I feel a tremendous amount of guilt though even calling her toxic because I know that she does love me and did provide for me greatly and I feel like I don't really have a right to complain to voice this issue because so many people have experienced so much worse.

Is she toxic? And more importantly, how do I handle her once I move out in three months for my master's program?

I applied for and was approved on my Platinum card earlier this year with a $2,400 limit (early 20s, working full time and making 50-60k annually). I get a minor raise in June and I'm planning on asking for a limit increase to $4,000. This is my go-to card and I use it very regularly. I have no expenses (I live with my parents to save money for grad school) and a 796 credit score. Do you think I'd be approved for that increase?