u/megsnewbrain

I had sort of an unsettling Mall World dream. I’m not immune to the natural disaster themes, needing to move quickly. I have the trashy amusement park, the fancy hotel by the water, the cobblestone shopping area, the underwater subway station and for the most part people just generally move about their business

Last night, a group ‘came in to help prepare’ but it felt a bit more ominous and militant. Like it didn’t belong. As if no one in Mall World could decide if we should listen to them or not

Seeing if anyone has experienced the same

Anyone know what’s going on with the police helicopters overhead?

First, I’m sending hugs to anyone who has experienced any kind of domestic or intimate partner violence. None of what happened to you was ok. You don’t have ever have to say it was. Violence is violence, even if it’s “just words” or “just money”

I have met Nia on the pageant circuit. We have attended some of the same workshops because we used the same coaches back around 2011-2013.

I, too, felt I needed to re center my life and joined a church. Unbeknownst to me, this church was an offshoot of hillsong which is also an offshoot of Mosaic.

I met my ex at church. We went to Bible study. He was ok with me wanting to take this slow physically, seemed like a ‘good Christian man.’

It started with me taking a new job because being a manager of a national brand’s flagship in OC was “a lot on a budding relationship”. So I got a GM role at a small boutique. Then “God” told asshole that I was “the one he’d been waiting for,” and we got married within 6 months.

By the time I left 4 years later, I literally had to ask permission to use the toilet. I couldn’t open windows or take the kids outside. I couldn’t wear anything above my knees. The first time we went to church after having my daughter, I went to begin nursing (with a cover) and was immediately berated with phrases such as “you’re just doing this so other men look at your tits. You are so disgusting”.

He didn’t hit me for many years. But he said and did the exact things Danny says and does and I did the same things Nia does.

It takes a lot to leave. More than you can imagine, if you’ve never been in that spot; but you can leave and I hope she does. I left the moment I knew I had indisputable evidence and guess what? It’s take over 6 years in court and I still don’t have full custody. Fuckface was convicted of a crime against me, left me with a TBI and cPTSD and yet, presents as ‘a good Christian man’ and I look like the hysterical woman. I have 90%physical and “tie breaking authority” but the state never fully removed his custody. Legal or otherwise.

People. Fuck the phrase “sticks and stones,”; they taught us this lesson wrong too. The broken bones heal. The words stay forever. If anyone makes you feel even a little bit sad about yourself, YOU ARE ALL THAT AND A BAG OF CHIPS. That other person can’t even hold the bag of chips.