u/mouurrpfinakuwu

okay so yeah this a rant about a kinda small and insignificant thing BUTT

i'm angry cuz well here a moid on a draw's subreddit was like "do i draw good for my age?? 🥺🥺" and i just saw that post and i was like "damn it is soo good mate, really really good u are talented! i can't draw like that even though i have like 6-7 years drawing, ofc not too often but yeah, it's soo goodd" and he was like "nah i wish i was talented is just the effort i put on that" and i was like "yeah but u still talented, i don't wanna make u feel like i'm invalidating ur effort cuz it isn't the case" and he was like "yeah but it is just the effort and practice" and i was like "yeah but it still good, don't b that rude with yourself" AND THEN he said "u just have to practice dude, is all practice" and ❔❔❔❔ BITCH i'm complimenting you, why are u now so rude?? and i already told him that, like "dude i'm just completing you, come on, relax" and he stills the same like "and i am giving you a advice" what fucking advice bitch i'm literally just complimenting you, you know you are good with that shi but u don't have to be so rude like what the fuck with u, i don't wanna compliment any moid again, just hopeless about them they're have a big ego not matter what, all of them just fucking rude GODDESS

sooo i have 1,216 oomfs BUT I've been inactive so now i just have like 3 likes and if i'm lucky i have 10 or maybe more but isn't too often....

BUT BUT BUUUUUUTTTT i see accounts with 500 followers or even like 200 or less and they have like 20-40 likes and 10-20 reply's

i know maybe it's because i was too inactive but now i'm more active, i interact with my moots, i post things but i still the same

i'm part of subtwt and some communities are getting banned from twt and stuff cuz there's some toxic part of it but i swear i'm not part of the toxic community of them, also, i'm trying 2 start on other communities like idk, archivetwt, or just like everyone that has their acc like a digital dairy and some silly posts uuhhhhhh but idk what 2 do, even if i wanna stay like some kind of 'niche acc' i also wanna some interactions cuz it's boring not having reply's or some likes & rt

i feel like a loser and waister of life, resources and oxygen when ppl around me at my age or kinda like my age are always busy or maybe just have a life....

they always have things to do, they always like "oh yeah i gotta do something that day" or shi like this and well i don't do anything like that, obviously cuz i know i can't and it's more complex than just "going outside and do something" but i feel like a parasite

i feel so ashamed when they see me like "and what u have to do?" and i'm just like ".. nothing"

Sooo u know, imma cosmickin and stuff, well, so because of that i ain't no age, no gender, no body but form.. But in human words and terms, idk what am i!

i'm not male, not female, but this body is a female body, i'm kinda "meh" about it but we live in a human world and with human rules, so, yup uhm, i don't really know what's supposed am i about that gender thing

maybe should i stay just like a androgynous thing that's not going 2 tell u their gender but u can assume whatever u want?

Heloo, imma cosmickin-eldritchkin-celestialkin andd well uhm, i wanna think with us about any tips 4 this..

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i wanna feel more connected with the cosmos and everything, less with this human body cuz, well, i wanna feel connected with my true self, not this human-ish thing sooo, idk

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Glitter, more purple, maybe more cosmic accesories? i can't change too much my clothes but i can use another babies 4 that! like accesories, my piercings, hair,,, uhhmm idk pahhahajshs

I just realized that all i've been through has been so bad that now i'm slowly going literally crazy, i don't even know what to feel or think about it cuz i always feel like nothing of what i've been through is valid and also any problem i have isn't valid too, like they're just sooo small and soft, i'm just overreacting but now i don't know..... I'm literally going crazy and i can't do anything about it cuz i'm still a teenager and well i don't have money and my parents are negligent so i can't get help.. That makes it feel even more smaller.

I've been like this for like a year if we're talking about the hallucinations and being even more paranoid and delusional, ofc isn't "that bad" cuz i can uhh still speaking well, explaining myself well, but i'm slowly starting 2 think that all what i feel and see is real even if i know "my" reality isn't real.

Also, probably the reason of why i'm not "that bad" is because i actually have a really hopeful and strong temperament so yup, it doesn't let it be too bad sometimes but yeah...

I don't know what to think about all of this, like, the majority of the stuff i've been through is because my family yk? i love them with all my soul, it hurts like hell knowing that they did this to me, but i don't blame them.

Uhhh idk what to think idk what to feel...

Also uhm, i don't really wanna get better, like yeah, but first i need to get worse so i could get help cuz it's going to be so bad that my parents can't ignore it anymore and they've been forced to give me help... Sorry it's just that it feels like only in that way i could be helped right now

btw sorry if my english is weird or bad, it's not my first language :b anddd sorry if this vent is kinda weird or something.... it's my first post here btw

okay, so, uhm, imma teenager okay? i'm 16 and idk, these day's i'm thinking a lot about all the hippie movement and budism and all around it, i know it can be a little bit difficult 2 be hippie these day's or, at least, being the most "tradicional" way of hippie, so, i wanna know how you guys are modern hippies cuz i feel like i truly wanna be hippie, probably i'm going 2 be one on my adulthood cuz i'm gonna have more freedom and stuff,,, i feel like the hippie movement need to return these day's, it feels like the world need it yk? we don't need more violence, we don't need more discussions or fights or divisions, we need each other and we need to see each other like a equal, like a sister, like a brother, like humans cuz all of us are humans, sooo also i wanna uuuhhh bring it into my art cuz yeah i guess imma artist and i wanna be one for all my life and yupp, yupp, yupp, heheheh sorry if my english is weird or something, it's not really my first language