u/nowtherearetwofthem

I know I’m not that great, I know my aims sucks and my positioning is terrible, I know I have a defeatist mindset and have an unhealthy obsession with the being good at everything I do and get mad when I can’t do that as soon as try something and then quit, also don’t get how I can’t play the game in ranked or qp anymore, I’ve played ranked more consistently then I ever have and for some reason all I do is rank down now, I understand some off angling and that but even when I do get a pick doing that my team doesn’t seem to advance up, or my tank and supports play passively and don’t press our advantage , or maybe I’m just to aggressive and self centered to see that they can’t push up.

I’m trying to play mostly Genji and echo who I understand and highly technical and difficult, but I have played enough Genji over the past year and a half to pick up the basics, I’m new to echo though. It’s just for some reason ever since I’ve got back home for the summer I can’t play the game as good as I did in my dorm.

I’m putting two vods below to get some feedback on what I can do better, besides my aim it’s horrific mostly cause my mousepads to small and I’ve only played fps on pc for maybe 2 years at. Rank is gold 4 and germlin is the player

Midtown-GYTY43
-Moslty played echo here I felt like I didn’t do bad at the start but by the end of attacking we decided to stagger for like 3 minutes and we couldn’t do anything, defense was me showing how bad I can play, I only picked emre cuase I got really frustrated and pissed off.

Runasapi-Rs65aj
-Genji and echo this game, I swap off Genji cuase we were getting our ass kicked, I didn’t do much all game and I resorted to blaming our tank all game cuase I felt like they did nothing instead of blaming myself for not doing enough.

Let me say I’m a bad player, like I struggle to do anything and the only character I play is Genji, who I suck at, but he’s the only character I can enjoy. But I’ve noticed the quality of games in qp just suck, I’m not asking for comp level matchmaking but after going 3-12 6 outta 10 games you’d think mmr would adjust but it’s seems like not matter how continuously bad I preform I can’t get better quality games. like I can still pull out wins but most of them come from me getting carried when I still play horrible, I’ve gotten used to being able to tell when the matchmaker hands you free games to win. This also could be my incredibly low self esteem making me unable to think positively about what I do, but i seriously think my mmr just won’t change for some reason no matter how bad I play.

No matter what I do I can be happy or proud of myself unless I’m the best, I have this obsession with being the best at everything I do and I cant handle not being the best. I have to convince myself I don’t care to be fine with it and that leads to me not trying or giving up in general, but when I do care I have this obsessive need to be the best and beat everyone at everything and as soon as I lose I have a mental breakdown about why can’t I be the best, I’m constantly comparing myself to others to, I just can’t be happy with me because I have this internal belief that theirs always someone better and you should always strive to beat them, I don’t know how to fix it or what to do about this and it’s ruining my life and my ability to just enjoy things.

Like I’m not even good at Genji, but I have never been targeted, counterswapped, tbagged, and gotten as much hate as I have when playing Genji. Like it seems like the community deems it as their goal to immediately destroy Genji when you play him, in comp I’m fine with this, but it happens less in comp then in quickplay, the amount of solo ults I have received is insane, and I used to be a tank main before becoming a Genji main, and I have been counerswaped more with him then I ever did playing tank, its actually insane.

I haven’t enjoyed a game this much in a while, like genuinely the demo was one of the most enjoyable experiences I’ve hade in a while, one thing I think would be cool though would be making stone bridges impassable so rafts can’t go under them, I think it would add more strategy to where you have the major river crossings and where you put your ports, but this game is like a 9/10 and we haven’t even gotten the full game yet.

I don’t understand how hopping into a quickplay match is a more miserable experience than playing drives, like how is the low stress game-mode less enjoyable then the absolute hell hole that it drives. I haven’t played quickplay in a couple weeks but I hoped into to play shion and only 1 game out of almost 10 I think has been a close enjoyable game every other game was one team destroying the other, I swear blizzard just wants this part of the game to rot because it doesn’t work right, or it works perfectly right since I’m on Reddit complaining about it.

This I such a doomer take and rant but I don’t care

Why should I as Genji have to put in 10 times the effort of any other dps players out side of tracer and echo just to get the same and usually less value.

Why should we have to be fine with our character being miserable to play because on paper he’s fine. He has no role in this game anymore and I think that’s what blizzard wants because they’d rather suck on their supports balls and keep him mid so they can get there money from them buying skins, and oh boy of they do buff him and he’s actually fun to play you bet they nerf him into the ground but leave the other busted characters alone because the entire community collectively decides to nerf Genji, fuck this game and fuck blizzard, I’m not gonna stop play because my life sucks and this game is the only decent amount of enjoyment I get but fuck blizzard just hates Genji don’t they.

The truth is 2k isn’t an nba game it’s an online competitive basketball game and the sooner they realize that the better off everyone will be. I prefer simulation play and it’s clear they don’t care about it so they should just drop the license and let someone else pick it up so we can get a decent playable game. They will still get the dedicated my career players who play for the online modes while giving people like me actual hope for someone to make a playable and most importantly fun game for simulation play.

I’m just tired of the same predictable swings between losing impossible to win games and winning for free, both modes quickplay and comp have devolved into not actual having to play the game anymore, I swear 75% of matches your play is irrelevant and the win or lose is just determined by the matchmaker. Like I am at the point where I either get games I can’t compete in at all or dominate, I’m so tired of it. Why can’t they just use an actually competitive matchmaker, because what we have now feels like the most non competitive thing possible.